• pairing: zeke x warrior!gn!reader (reader is afab though)
• synopsis: zeke uncovers your secret and offers the only solution he can think of
• cw: pregnancy (but it's NOT happy), miscarriage mention
• author's note: I thought this would be a pretty interesting concept, please don't think too hard about the logistics as I deliberately kept some things pretty vague, this isn't really meant to fit perfectly in the plot cause...how could it. anyway not sure when I'll write the other chapters as this was pretty uncomfortable to write ngl?? lol
As you sat on the bed, your demeanour shifted from cold and tense to terrified and erratic in minutes. You first seemed to almost physically crumble from the weight of your problems, but then heavy sobs tore themselves from your throat, only interrupted by quick gasps for air. Even so, every time you breathed, you looked like you might choke or vomit. Maybe both.
It scared Zeke. Especially when the past few weeks had been so strange. You were distant and very obviously avoiding him. He didn't want to be pushy. You've been patient with him at every turn, when his mental health got bad or when he was incapacitated by the countless lumbar punctures inflicted upon him. You were always what he needed.
Still, he couldn't deny that he was a little hurt. He really did like you and thought you might be soulmates.
Now, he was hesitant even to just reach out to touch your shoulder. He may have been sitting right next to you, but he felt as though he'd never been so far away from anybody.
"What's wrong?" he asked clumsily, knowing you probably wouldn't be able to answer him.
Zeke was correct, you were sobbing so hard there was no way for you to get any words out and even if you had been physically able to do so it may have not been possible mentally, you just couldn't will yourself to say it no matter what. So, instead of saying anything, you staggered to your feet and began to remove your coat. Your sweaty hands were shaking so violently, undoing every button was a struggle. When you finally managed to open the garment, you slipped it off your trembling shoulders and hung your head. Tears spilt down your face endlessly and left small, wet marks on your shirt.
Zeke seemed slightly confused at the gesture, but he anxiously adjusted his glasses and tried to maintain a neutral expression. He didn't see anything out of the ordinary.
He helplessly opened his mouth and then closed it again. He felt like whatever he might say could potentially make everything worse. Even though he would've given anything to know the right thing to say to you in that moment, anything to help you calm down.
You sensed his confusion so next you untucked your shirt and roughly yanked it up to your chest.
Sure enough, there it was.
Inconspicuous enough beneath several layers of clothing but with nothing covering it, unmistakable.
Zeke's eyes widened behind his glasses. He couldn't truly believe what he was seeing. If he could've made a rational, conscious decision, he most definitely wouldn't have reached out to touch it, but he had to. It was the only way to verify that his eyes were, in fact, not deceiving him. As soon as his palm made contact with your warm skin, you flinched and quickly pulled away, but so did he.
Suddenly, Zeke too felt rather sick, the reality of the situation finally sinking in. Still, he tried his hardest not to let his emotions get to him, not now. After all, at the end of the day, it was in your body. He could've technically ran away from it all, literally or, more likely given his circumstances, figuratively. He could've pretended this had nothing to do with him...not that he planned to.
You weren't so lucky, you were trapped in this nightmare no matter what.
"Can...c-can you get rid of it?" he asked, his voice trailing off, not daring to look you in the eyes. You were grateful. You couldn't bear to look at him either.
After taking a shaky breath and nervously licking your lips, you finally spoke. "I tried, I mean I-I wanted to...but then I was too scared. I didn't know who to turn to."
You felt a pang of guilt in your chest. Normal parents would be overjoyed, but you weren't normal parents. Even thinking of the word "parent" made you want to crawl out of your skin.
Zeke tried to steady his breathing even though the pit in his stomach grew by the second. You were not to blame. In your position, he would've been terrified too, hell, he was terrified enough as is. There really was no escape.
"I understand...so how long...how..." Zeke breathed, his voice unsteady, finding his throat too dry to ask what he wanted, but you knew what he meant.
A few moments passed in complete silence before you replied, your voice barely audible.
"I...I don't know. Weeks and weeks...months even."
You swallowed and awkwardly twisted your waist one way then the other as if getting a better look at it would somehow provide you with an accurate answer.
The longer you stared at it, the more horrified you became. It was easy enough to ignore it initially. Even once you started to show, it wasn't too hard. You just had to wear more layers. Out of sight, out of mind, right? But you couldn't fool yourself, not forever. You tried acting like nothing was wrong, but it was difficult when you could think of nothing but methods you could possibly use to induce a miscarriage.
Knowing that it was growing stronger every day frightened you, and before you knew it, the swell of your abdomen was getting difficult to conceal.
Zeke held his head in his hands.
He never wanted children. You never wanted children. Or, more accurately, it was never something you'd think of, even putting your shared worldview aside. People like you did not have babies. Warriors were warriors. Not parents.
Neither of you had more than a handful of years left to live, not nearly enough. Who would care for it after both of you perished? Zeke's parents weren't around anymore, and neither were yours. Would his grandparents be willing? Or even...Eren?
No, no way. That was wishful thinking, not to mention completely unrealistic. Before you'd die, would you be able to find anyone who had the heart to take in a toddler about to become an orphan?
No. It'd be much more difficult than that. Anyone would eagerly take it, the successor of the Wonderboy.
Marley would train it into a warrior in no time. A super soldier, much like Zeke and with royal blood, no less. Endless war, anguish, conquests, countless experiments, and lumbar punctures. A massively shortened lifespan.
Still, nothing could be done anymore. Nothing made sense, and neither of you could think clearly.
Zeke briefly lifted his head and reached out towards you to gently pull your shirt back down over your stomach. For your own sake and his, neither of you could look at it any longer.
"I'm sorry," you muttered, your voice hardly a whisper as you sat back down next to Zeke.
"No, I'm sorry I had been careless. Clearly, I should've taken more precautions, and now I've put you into this situation. I'm sorry."
Suddenly, Zeke felt you embracing him for the first time after weeks of barely any interaction. You clung to him grimly, finally your gasping sobs dissolving into sniffles and hiccups. Despite the circumstances, wrapping your arms around Zeke and feeling his surprisingly soft, warm scent was heavenly. Being so close to him again made you almost believe that things could turn out well. Somehow.
He nuzzled his cheek against your neck, and from the way he was breathing, you could tell he was crying too.
"Let's get out of here. Let's leave Marley," he whispered abruptly.
He wouldn't let you down. This was your only chance.