a lion still has CLAWS.

here's the truth: a girl is a gun. and between the two, was there ever any difference? MARY AGATHA MACDONALD. auror. mudblood & proud. dog person. former gryffindor. relentless. twenty one.

[marvelsrunaways]

[findingwordsforthoughts]

Stop wishing you had thicker skin just so you could take more hits.

m.v., There’s a reason we have bruises.  (via padshiy)

[marvmacdonald]

@traitcrisms asked me to shuffle my playlist and use my favorite line of the next song ( me & mr jones - amy winehouse ) as a starter  ( meme. accepting. )

“What kind of FUCKERY are we?,” she exclaims, hands thrown in the air in desperation before laughter bubbles past her lips, loudly and freely. It’s not that funny, really, but Mary is serious all too often, and would rather laugh at her situation than cry at it. “Jesus, Peter. Sorry for laughing. It’s not --- I guess it kind of is.” She buries her head in her hands, shaking it slightly, still. Part of her wants to burst out in tears, right there, or kick something hard, but she sticks with laughter. ( It’s desperate, though, as if she’s asking it to heal all the broken spots in her body. ) “I mean, bloody look at us --- at all of us, really. Can’t believe that the world fucked us like this.” Denying reality has never been something Mary has been good at, but to accept the whole truth of the situation is hard nonetheless. ( Especially when it’s so fucking dreary. ) “It’s complete madness, all of this. Ridiculous.”

[dailyb99gifs]

[macdvnaldarchive]

[marvmacdonald]

mary + social media 1/?

[macherierps]

[tvandfilm]

[marvmacdonald]

@hvldings​ asked me to use a line from my favorite TV show ( the office ) as a starter.  ( meme. accepting. )  

“Do you want me to beat him up for you?,” Mary asked, raising her eyebrows as she brought her coffeecup to her lips. “I’ll do it. I’ll even pay you, if you’ll let me --- what an arse.” That plenty of their male colleagues were able to be right dickheads was no surprise to Mary, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t endlessly frustrating. “I’d love to ... just ... have a go at his nose. After my coffee, of course, but still. Fighting with fists is just more satisfactory than dueling.” She was grinning, then --- she wasn’t serious, of course ( not entirely, at least --- she wouldn’t mind a reason to introduce someone to her right hook at that moment, but that was unrelated to all this ). “I’d love to knock a Death Eater’s mask off their face just with my bare fist, one day.”

[marvmacdonald]

@alixcs asked me to use a line from my favorite TV show ( the office ) as a starter.  ( meme. accepting. )  

“I don’t back down,” said Mary. A statement that was true enough, as she had proven over the past years --- Mary MacDonald fell down plenty, but she always got back up. ( Maybe one day, she no longer would --- but not if she had a bloody say in it. ) “I’ll be fine, Alice. It’s just a tough week, but it’s just another week, you know? It’ll end. The next one will come.” She sipped at her tea, looked at the old newspaper that lay between them on the kitchen table for a second before folding it up tighter so she could see less. A sigh spilled past her lips as her head went over the past few days --- and then it reflected the past few weeks, months, years. Mary felt a fatigue in her bones that made her want to close her eyes and forget about the world for a second. ( She wouldn’t, though --- Mary had never been able to ignore the things in front of her, no matter how badly she wanted to. ) “At least tea still exists, right?” 

[marvmacdonald]

It had been a long day --- SCRATCH THAT, it had been a long bloody year. Time seemed to pass by so much slower, despite the fact that so much was happening, and Mary didn’t get it. Confusion was not a new emotion to her, though --- but it was overwhelming that day. Death Eaters dying was usually good news, but this time when she’d heard the news ( when she had seen the body ), her mind had reacted differently. She hadn’t known Regulus Black well, but she had known him. She had hit bludgers in his direction. She’d seen him during dinners and breakfast and in the hallways. And --- fuck, Mary knew that someone having been at Hogwarts didn’t make them bad or good, but still --- he was younger than she was. ( And he was Sirius’ brother, and that made things even stranger. )

There was no use in trying to understand how she felt. Feelings never worked well at work, after all ( or in general, during a war ), and so, in stead, Mary had taken to the Leaky Cauldron after work. Not to get smashed. Just to get a beer. Talk to a stranger or acquaintance or friend. Sneak outside for a cigarette and return for another beer and then --- damn it --- her elbow clashed against her bottle and it fell. Glass broke, the content of her beer bottle spilled over her feet and Mary cursed loudly, “Fucking hell.” She kicked the glass, wanted to stomp on it, but grabbed her wand in stead to clean up the mess. A beat. A deep breath. A dry chuckle -- “WHY are these bottles not charmed to be unbreakable? Would be grand for business, and make my life a whole lot bloody easier.”

[dailyb99gifs]

[marvmacdonald]

@warharbinger asked me to use a line from the last movie I watched ( roma ) as a starter ( meme. accepting. )

“We are alone,” said Mary, her words not louder than a huff of air. Her eyes trailed over her hands for a moment before looking up at Remus. “No matter what they tell you.” There was something uncoiling in her chest, a feeling of dread and sadness and bitterness. They were always there, of course, those feelings --- but as she spoke, it seemed as if they were being rudely woken up, shaken and trashed around. She took another hit from the spliff, passing it back to Remus. “When it comes down to it, you’re always bleeding alone. Don’t even know if that’s a bad thing.”

[ofhotheads-blog]

Want a random starter?

[spitfircs]

ofhotheads:

Send me a symbol…

🎬 for me to use a line from the last movie I watched as a starter 📹 for me to use a line from my favorite movie as a starter 📚 for me to grab the book nearest to me, flip to a random page, and use the first line of dialogue I see as a starter 🎧 for me to shuffle my playlist and use the first line of the next song as a starter 🎶 for me to use my favorite line of the last song I listened to as a starter 📺 for me to use a line from the last TV show I watched as a starter 💻 for me to use a line from my favorite TV show as a starter 🎵for me to shuffle my playlist and use my favorite line of the next song as a starter 💋 for a shippy starter 😡 for an angsty starter 👊 for an argument/fight starter 🌈 for a random encounter starter 💀 for a dark starter 🍬 for a fluffy starter

[thequeerwithoutfear-deactivated]

pick your battles. pick… pick fewer battles than that. put some battles back. that’s too many 

[marvmacdonald]

“she's fucking impetuous and daring, a little too bold and way too fucking fearless.”

MARY MACDONALD is 21 years old and works as an JUNIOR AUROR and is loyal to THE OOTP they were an GRYFFINDOR and are a MUGGLEBORN. SHE look like CHRISTIAN SERRATOS. 

CHARACTER PARALLELS: jessica jones ( jessica jones ), leia organa ( star wars ), arya stark ( asoiaf ), johanna mason ( the hunger games ), nancy wheeler ( stranger things ), rosa diaz ( b99 ), ellie ( the last of us ), raven reyes ( the 100 ), kat edison ( the bold type ), nina zenik ( six of crows ) AESTHETIC: red lipstick stains on drained cups of tea, leather jackets, cigarette bums crushed under doc martens, sitting down in the shower and letting time pass by, always wearing your gold cross necklace, messy ponytails, beer burps, laughter that’s filled with desperation, jean dungarees, screaming in your pillow, mud stained clothes, denim on denim on denim. LINKS: stats. pinboard. character tag. playlist.

history

mary had a little lamb? WRONG. mary had a little calf. because she was born on a dairy farm in the highlands of scotland ( laugh at my joke pls i worked hard on it ). she was born third to two muggles – a scottish father and a mexican mother, who loved each other deeply – and would eventually become their middle child. she could have become overlooked, but mary never felt discounted at home: while her parents were very often busy with the cows, their love ran deep.

her youth consisted of this: running through fields of grass, attending a muggle elementary where people sang songs at her ( old macdonald had a farm and mary had a little lamb, the former of which was, of course, accurate ), playing with the animals, building tree houses with her brothers and sister and playing football every spare moment she got. it was good and simple and wholesome.

of course, strange things happened, as they tend to with muggleborns: she’d explode her brother’s toy when she got angry, or let things fly around the room when she was laughing. when she found out she was a witch at age eleven, things fell in its place. and the macdonalds, while traditional catholics, accepted mary, which is the most important thing of it all. her parents were shocked, yes, but they squeezed her shoulder and promised to discover this all together.

which?? very much influenced mary greatly? because it went against a lot of things they – and she, too – believed in. magic was deemed evil by the church they attended. everything about this was supposed to be wrong, but her parents shifted their views because their love for their daughter was greater than their desire to cling to all the rules the church laid down for them, this has allowed her to have a faith in people, and while she may be cynical and bitter at times, that faith is still there.

i mean --- her parents accepted her, they were capable of openmindedness despite being traditional people in most other situations. other people can too.

hogwarts was as chaotic as home, and mary settled in quite nicely. sorted into gryffindor ( she guessed it was for her rambunctious nature, but who knew ), she found herself a second home and loved it. as it turned out, she was rather good with a wand as well – she didn’t do so good at essays, though – and genuinely liked learning ( except for history of magic. fuck that. ).

being a muggleborn had its downsides, of course, but mary never really allowed herself to feel discouraged. hurt? yes, definitely, but never discouraged. she wasn’t going to let it get to her, she told herself, but it did, especially when the harsh words turned into something more. it was during her confrontation with mulciber that mary felt true, harsh fear for the first time. she felt shut down, paralysed, depressed —– but then, after a while, she got up and took some important steps. she reported mulciber, which led to nothing, which caused her to feel angry, which in turn caused her to feel determination. if the system wasn’t going to be on her side, she’d just have to fucking change it, right? mary started throwing herself in her schoolwork, determined to join the dmle – hopefully as an auror, but any position would do. she suppressed her fear and the trauma that was there, and kept her head straight.

this entire situation is up for change and stuff when/if we get a mulciber! 

graduation rolled around and mary got the five required NEWTs to even apply. it was a nervewracking process, but once she got into auror training, she cried. like. for a full ass day. she was so proud of herself and she felt so determined and !! man. it was such a good, defining moment. around the same time, mary joined the order; she knew the ministry was corrupt, and that it’d not allow her to do everything she wanted to, when the order DID. mary had too much anger, too much determination to fight this bullshit to just stick with the ministry, and so the order seemed like the right place.

it’s only recently that mary graduated from her training and became a junior auror. it’s ... infuriating, at times, but also amazing. she hates the ministry and most of the people in it, feels paranoid in those walls, but knows that there are good people, too. people who want to better that place, like she does.

kaz brekker voice: brick by brick, i will destroy you.

also --- mary is ... very quite involved in the war. her time is divided between the order and work, and her dog. she’s determined to get this war to end. she doesn’t even care if she destroys herself in the process --- what does her life mean, if she could help save numerous people?

so right now, she’s fighting. she’s gritting her teeth and keeping her goals in the back in her mind and is focusing. and she does not always feel brave or confident or self assured, but that does not matter: mary macdonald always gets the fuck back up, and that’s what she will keep doing until she’s completely knocked down.

personality & tidbits.

mary is a human espresso. she’s so. damn. bitter?? despite the fact that she keeps on going and that she’s fighting her ass off, she’s tired and angry that things don’t seem to be moving in the right direction, she’s feeling bitter about the fact that this kind of discrimination is happening right in front of her eyes and that she does not have enough power to stop it. she feels powerless, which makes her feel bitter, which makes her cynical.

still! mary is not necessarily a debbie downer to be around. she keeps her bitterness ( and hopelessness, even ) carefully hidden in boxes in her mind. on the outside, she’s filled with quips and smiles and quick comments! just a sociable bean, but just a bitter one.

is a dog person and will fight anyone who prefers cats. has a cairn terrier called bowie. she loves him more than anyone.

obsessed with tea, tbh. her ma always said that ‘there’s nothing a cuppa can’t fix’ and mary definitely agrees with this statement.

though is also a ‘whiskey in a teacup’ kinda gal

can be spotted wearing either a rly nice ass blazer or a jean jacket, no inbetween. either office-fancy or farmer-chique

fucking loves muggle culture and loves fellow muggleborns and !!!!!! she loves it!!!

very much in a take-no-prisoners mindset at this point re: death eaters. it kind of scares her, tbh, but mary is very much capable of murdering a death eater, even if she could stun them — she’s just done. she’s very. done. with them. and this whole shbang? will only feed into this.

mary is ruthless, that’s what it boils down to. she’s a lot more than that, of course, but she’s ruthless — in small things ( football matches & boardgames ) but also in bigger ones, and of course the war is the main way it shows. mary is so angry. she’s so angry and scared and tired of feeling that way and tired of being scared to lose people and herself and of death and she’s so angry that people really are this way and that they really do these things — she wants it to stop. she wants the world to be right. and sometimes she thinks the ends do justify the means.

this is why she’s chaotic neutral and not chaotic good.

like ive had her turned to dark arts before just bc she’s so desperate to. fucking win. tbh i’m sure she has a growing interest rn. stop it mary :(

and she’s also like — mary doesnt care if she ruins herself? if she becomes a bad person who’s unable to live with the shit she’s done? as long as the world is better for it, as long as kids can go to hogwarts and feel safe and the world is a safe place for everyone. what does her soul matter in the grand scheme of things? she’d burn in hell forever if it meant the rest of the world changed for the better.

emotionally driven mess of a being

is catholic but struggles a lot with religion and feeling faithful, but she does still identify is a catholic, it’s just? complicated. it’s rly complicated and she hates it.

is a bit flighty when it comes to romance, def has a lot of one night stands/fwb situations though??? she’s just like??? i dont have time for romance its a WAR

has been trying to stop smoking for five years, but alas

a proud scot. a proud latina. proud proud proud. such a fucking lionness.

mary was a beater during her time at hogwarts and was Highly competitive. threw herself into the sport tbh after the mulciber incident. she still thinks football is superior, but you know, it isnt in the air.

she’s pan and out of the closet --- something that did put a strain on her relationship with her family. ( the fact that they could accept her magic but not her sexuality ... baffles mary, but bigots have never been very reasonable. ) she’s not very open about it at home, but otherwise ... she’s out here lovin everyone.

plot ideas!

roomies —– so mary is not Earning A Whole Lot Right Now but does not want to live at home any more because 1. its in the middle of nowhere and 2. most importantly, she’s afraid of endangering her family. she needs roomies! i’d love for her to live in glasgow/edinburgh/london/idk a city!!!

hook ups/fwb’s/etc —– mary is what the old ppl call promiscuous and she sleeps around. so ! let’s talk! former hook ups! booty calls! friends with benefits! etc etc etc!

party pals —- mary likes going to pubs and clubs in the muggle part of town bc it is a LIT way to escape the reality of the wizarding world and also, muggle clubs have better music. come party w her!!!!

in the dragon’s den together —- fellow ministry employees who side eye the ministry and whom mary can sip tea and judge their colleagues with

mudbloods club —- mary loves her fellow muggleborns and i would love some muggleborn friends that she can be buds with. ranting about dumb pureblood names and traditions and the fact that wizards dont have movies

general friendship ideas —- im just going to a bunch of ideas here: hogwarts friends, ride or dies, order pals, friendly exes, fellow tea drinkers that she can go on coffee/tea dates with, friends who are growing apart bc of the war (my fave), etc.

etc —- some other ideas i want to spitball: purists who h8 on mary’s life, fellow diagon alley employees, fellow order members, Annoyances, there is solidarity in being scottish, ministry connections, etc etc etc HIT ME UP

[baawri]

[dvoyd]

help me remember: not everything in life is a battle. i don’t need to carry a knife everywhere i go. help me learn: how to shed my armor without shedding tears. how to open up my arms without raising my fists. help me understand: i can be vulnerable, and still be strong. i can be made of steel, and still be soft. help me realize: if life is a battle, i don’t have to fight it alone.

even in war, i am not without allies | m.a.w (via dvoyd)