MarWandering...

[marwandering]

[marwandering]

21km, 1hr56mins later! #rakmarathon

[marwandering]

21km, 1hr56mins later! #rakmarathon

[marwandering]

Friends are the family you chose @ayafiji thank you for an amazing birthday surprise!!

[marwandering]

[marwandering]

Log and catalog all the stuff you want to accomplish before you expire. Read stories and watch videos by people who checked items off their own bucketlists.

[marwandering]

Free falling

I googled bucket list  and this was the first link I found: http://bucketlist.org/.

A social media medium to help you keep track of, and share all the things you want to do before you die. I was a fan of the whole pin board  hanging on your bedroom wall idea. It's a creative reminder that also has decorative purposes. Nonetheless, we are in the midst of a digital revolution, so i guess it's about time to get the app and receive regular reminders that you have yet to complete 170 items of your dream inventory. That wouldn't be half bad actually...

Either way, with or without notifications, it's been my mission to tackle as much as i could off that list- although every time i make some progress it seems like another item is added to it. But that's a story for another time. This weekend, i ticked off another: skydiving!

I made my friend book it for me a month ago because i never though i would actually go through with it. Eventually though, the moment of truth crept up and i found myself sitting inside the Skydive Dubai building waiting for my "buddy" to call my name and strap me in. Due to undesirable weather conditions, our jump kept getting delayed. The 3 hour long wait though, was made so much more entertaining by friends posting horror stories about "jumps gone wrong"-thanks Gaby! My mom freaking out because she saw i was online on whatsapp but not responding to her messages. No mom I wouldn't be taking selfies and whatsapping them to my friends if i were laying in a ditch with a broken spine. And of course all the hilarious buzz feed articles to scroll through on Facebook. I must say it's impossible to be bored nowadays! Anyhow, we were finally called to suit up and board our flight!

Now, up until that point i was quite calm. I guess it hadn't occurred to me that i was about to jump out of a plane. However, once boarded, my heart rate escalated in proportion to our atmospheric altitude. I was seated at the end of the plane and as every one of the 6 jumpers dove before me i heard a not so encouraging "woooosh". Finally, it was my turn to start walking down the narrow aisle. My heart went thump, my brain said turn back and then suddenly i was staring down at the palm. Why did i want to do this? my personal camera man, who by the way was hanging out the side of the plane, points to his go pro yells out over the ear blasting wind "say cheese!". I wanted to yell back "Say cheese!?!? I'm about to throw myself into an abyss!!!". And then, I was hurled forward and free falling for what felt like an eternity completely unaware of my body, my thoughts, even that i was pretty much yelling my lungs out. Suddenly, i was yanked backwards and the world slowed down. Forget panoramic view, 360 vision. You are looking down at the city of life from the heavens. My advice, seeing the world from 13,000ft-must add to your bucket list.

Well, that was then followed by a sushi dinner and drinks on the beach. Life, went back to normal. Haha, talk about anti climatic! Okay so while life goes back to normal and for the most part, so do you, a spark still ignites. And no matter how small, it triggers a reminder that you need to turn that list into a reality.

So, what are you scratching of that bucket list?

[marwandering]

#winetimeisthebesttime

[marwandering]

2014 rak bank half marathon race pack #21Kaintgotnothingme!

[marwandering]

Mindfully Mindful

I've wracked my brain trying to decide what to write about but it seems this week has lacked a little explicit inspiration. While you have your set of eccentricities in Dubai, I have yet to encounter the inspiring story of a woman going above and beyond to bring English lessons to her refugee camp, or the eye opening family of 15 that lives in a room no bigger than a tiny African hut.

However, if you listen intently enough there is always an underlying theme...in these last two weeks it seems that it's been mindfulness and meditation. Every other post on my news feed was "the benefits of meditation",  "practice mindfulness" "Why your brain needs more downtime" and so fourth. It seemed like someone was trying to clue me into something. "Hello...anyone there?".

Well I decided to give this a try: signed up for Get Some Headspace, did more yoga, tried to focus on my breathing and let my thoughts drift away like clouds as I ran up and down the Dubai Marina. Well, not to kill the buzz on the western fad of adopting eastern philosophy, but this whole mindfulness thing...it's only just  probed at my existential crisis. HOWEVER,  as I have mentioned before,  with a little sanding any said "negative" emotion, event, trait etc. can be morphed into a sleek work of art. Personally, this is what I have discovered: my anxieties stem from the fear of living the mundane routine of the unwritten, but collectively believed societal story of success (granted it does work for many! not saying there's anything wrong with it). The problem is, it's very easy to get comfortable and get carried away with a job, rent bills, "priorities", going out, social customs that the bigger picture gets lost in the chaos (if you have managed not to lose sight, I beg of you tell me how). I am guilty of this, there are moments of spontaneity and inspiration where I tick of 3 things off my  bucket list, but then they are followed by months of drought. My mother would accuse me of looking at the glass half-full. She would say "There is no need to accomplish it all at once, you have a full life ahead of you to do it all...". Agreed, but what if getting so caught up with responsibilities makes you forget what it is you dreamt of doing. I'm not talking about going sky-diving on the weekend, or the two week trip to Italy you manage to squeeze in over the summer. Those are the little joys of life, the momentarily or temporary ecstasies we experience (which we must also keep in mind). I am talking about living in a constant state of elation by becoming that writer you wanted to be, saving the planet and humanity, opening a business...

What I am trying to say is, it's important to check in everyone in a while... Tell me, what dream have you let sit on that shelf for too long?

[marwandering]

My kinda #retailtherapy

[marwandering]

“The more powerful and original a mind, the more it will incline towards the religion of solitude.” ― Aldous Huxley

[marwandering]

The hidden power of loneliness

I often get asked: What is it you love about running?

I can name many reason why: The opposition as your body pulls you in different directions, your feet propelling you forward, the beat your sneakers create as they hit the pavement, the rhythm of your breath. Hell, I even love the blisters. But mostly, the solitude. An hour of just you, your challenge, your thoughts. Hence my surprise every time I see people running in pairs… Makes me want to yell: you’re missing the point!

But then again, if you love something, doesn’t sharing it with someone make it that much more exciting? Thus, the different kinds of runners got me thinking of: company, solitude and loneliness. 

As a hidden introvert, I still cannot wrap my head around the need to constantly be around people. There is, undeniably a beauty in sharing experiences, emotions, thoughts, words, even food with a fellow soul but there is also an undeniable strength in the soul that can spend time alone. Solitude though, differs from loneliness. Websters dictionary defines solitude as “a state or situation in which you are alone usually because you want to be” and lonely as “sad from being apart from other people”. But, how does one differentiate the two? 

In recent weeks, between moving, training, working…much of my time has been spent alone. Some of it I loved, other times I hated it. It’s that simple. Jean Paul Sartre says it best “If you’re lonely when you’re alone, you’re in bad company”. To me, it is a state of hanging out with a worst enemy. Solitude, on the other hand, is conversing with the one who knows you best. The rare moment we are allowed the complete liberty of being ourselves, be it in our minds or in the privacy of our homes, an opportunity to get re-acquainted with ourselves. We learn, change and grow on a daily basis, solitude is when you shed the old skin and let the new layer breath. But what when you discover something you don’t like? A feeling too negative to bear? Knowledge of the self we wish not accept? An idea our ego wants nothing more than to deny? Those questions are why many reject  the mere idea of being alone. But why? Gibran, in his essay on Reason and Passion talks of both as guests in our homes. Now why would we welcome one and not the other? We encounter all kinds of people on a daily basis, some we love, others, I don’t want to say hate, so let’s say “don’t hold in very high esteem”. Whether we like it or not, we must interact with both. So why accept the feelings of joy and excitement and positivity gladly, but shy away from the negative? What if beyond that we find the diamond in the rubble?

[marwandering]

[marwandering]

13 months and 4 days since my last post. I had pretty much given up on this blog, but in light of my new "move" I have decided to re-ignite it.

From the capital of Spain, to the villages of Ghana, followed by a stint in the camps Palestine I have finally ended up where I never though I would: Dubai. I shunned the idea of coming here for the longest time. The Gulf and Dubai especially, just screamed sell out. But, sometimes, intuition, the soul, the heart, a sixth sense, a gut feeling, call it what you will, draws out an unexpected path and the day I got on that flight, I knew I wasn't coming home.

Prior to coming here I worked in retail at one of my favourite brands: Lululemon Athletica. The experiences there have nothing on my Spanish escapades, or the soulful impact of a Palestinian refugee camp but I learned one thing in my goal coaching that I have resolved to live by and that is "When something scares you, then you have to do it". I still remember my manager asking me "if you could do anything what would it be?"  I told her. She then asked "Well why aren't you" and I responded "because I am afraid, afraid of failing, of the response and of so much" and she said "because it scares you, you absolutely must do it. I had ignored that piece of advice for a long time, not that I don't do things that scare me, I just never thought about it. However, last night, when slightly under the influence that conversation popped into my head.

I thought of all the things that have scared me in the past that I've overcome and how that's affected my present. How things could have been had I done others?  And the power of fear, not in terms of the hold it has over us, but in what it could teach us. 

Not to state the obvious but most of our greatest challenges and rewards always stem from doing something that involved some kind of being afraid. Regretting what hasn't been done is useless but for one thing: to remind you not to listen to the voice that held you back last time. Strangely enough I realized that fear is an indispensable tool. This contradicts all eastern philosophy and every empowering blog post advising you on how to "live a better 2014". Let me explain my philosophy. We, as human beings are born with a set of tools, personality traits, emotions, attitudes and attributes, neither one of which, I believe, is either positive or negative. Our utilization of them determines whether they become our greatest strengths or weaknesses. And fear, like other emotions, can go either way. Its detriments are obvious, no need to state them. 

It's when thinking of my present terrors that I concluded that it could be one of our greatest assets if we chose to mould it as such. Understanding your fears and where they come from gives you a better idea of who you are. But more importantly it is a reminder of what you love, you wouldn't worry about failing or losing something if you didn't love it. 

So my new question is: do I not strive for what I love out of some kind of fear or do I pursue it, confidently knowing that whatever comes out of this I can somehow bend to my benefit?

[marwandering]

“A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water.”

Eleanor Roosevelt,

[marwandering]

Half the sky

I took a second trip this week, this time to the other end of the world. While Ramallah, Jerusalem and Bethlehem were great touristic experiences involving sights, local foods, hostels, drinks and ended with uplifted spirits on the ride home. This last trip, however, was slightly more depressing. The executive director of the organization was emailed by a stranger, a traveller who had visited Hebron and stayed with a community whom she believed would greatly benefit from, and deserved, the kind of work we offer.

Again, as the only Arabic speaker in the group, I was invited to come along as interpreter. I had been pre-warned that this was not going to be like anything I’d seen in Palestine for the time being. Hebron, in general is more affected by the occupation than other parts, there being a settlement in the middle of the city and all. Where we went was a camp on the outskirts. It was made up of nothing more than a cluster of tents spread out across deserted land. Previously, this community lived on a seperate plot of land that had been raided by settlers and were forced to move to the nearest place possible so as not to lose their original land forever. Right now, there is a threat of their homes being torn down…again. There is no running water and they only get a few hours of electricity a day, which is provided thanks to solar panels.

            Nonetheless, there was a little light amidst that darkness. The woman we were put in contact with was something of a rarity. Married at 18, she left her husband only a few years later because he wasn’t good to her (she did not go into more detail). She then went to university and studied NGO organization (that’s what I understood at least), remarried and had a son. Her husband was a cab driver in Hebron that illegally drove back and forth from Israel, was fined, had his license revoked and now cannot drive until he pays his fine. She now works with several NGOs in Hebron and helps them set up shop in the area- connect them with locals, provide them with drivers, find them housing…making her the sole provider for her family. Which is seldom the case for women in Palestine. We visited her family’s home/tent at the camp and quickly popped into her brother’s home for a cup of coffee. Before that she showed us the women’s embroidery center. Women at the camp embroider dresses, bags, pouches…all to keep their families going.

The next day I went into a salon to get my eyebrows done. The esthetician seemed to have taken a liking to me and asked me to stay for a cup of coffee. Within half an hour she’d informed me all about her divorce, all her children, her relationship with them, what it took to leave the husband, how she is doing everything in her power to keep the strongest presence in her children’s lives, that she’s working so as not to have to ask her husband for a penny.

When the stereotype of the Arab woman is that of a stay at home mom, who does not leave her husband no matter what because of the shame that would bring to her and her family,  for whom it is more important to be married than educated.

There is nothing more inspirational than breaking a stereotype, defying a culture.