being anti ai is making me feel like in going insane. "you asked for thoughts about your characters backstory and i put it into chat gpt for ideas". studies have proven its making people dumber. "i asked ai to generate this meal plan". its causing water shortages where its data centers are built. "ill generate some pictures for the dnd campaign". its spreading misinformation. "meta, generate an image of this guy doing something stupid". its trained off stolen images, writing, video, audio. "i was talking with my snapchat ai-" theres no way to verify what its doing with the information it collects. "youtube is impletmenting ai based age verification". my work has an entire graphics media department and has still put ai generated motivational posters up everywhere. ai playlists. ai facial verification. google ai microsoft ai meta ai snapchat ai. everyone treats it as a novelty. every treats it as a mandatory part of life. am i the only one who sees it? am i paranoid? am i going insane? jesus fucking christ. if i have to hear one more "well at least-" "but it does-" "but you can-" im about to lose it. i shouldnt have to jump through hoops to avoid the evil machine. have you no principles? no goddamn spine? am i the weird one here?
all the petty scenes & all the pretty things | hjs
(where your best friend organizes a weekend away for all your single friends on valentine's and you have to deal with his very annoying roommate)
pairing: joshua hong x f!reader
genre: (one-sided) enemies to lovers, strangers to lovers (kinda) | smut & fluff
rating: explicit, minors DNI
word count: 20.5k
warnings: mentions of food and alcohol, drinking games, this is vaguely a long valentine's weekend (the holiday is barely mentioned), best friend jeonghan (yes, that's a warning), joshua is a menace, but reader is a bit of an unreliable narrator, so much kissing, multiple sex scenes, multiple positions, multiple orgasms, unprotected sex (they talk about it but don't do this), oral sex (f. receiving), some scratching, teasing, briefest edging?, aftercare, nipple/breast play, briefest mention of thigh riding, come eating, idk joshua is just pussy whipped and down horrendous
a/n: another one for the Lonely Hearts Collab organized by the incredibly talented @camandemstudios. please make sure you check out the other amazing fics (like i will be now that i've gotten through both). i'm not really sure what to say about this. something happens when i write joshua and it just...gets away from me. thank you to @tomodachiii, @highvern, and @lovetaroandtaemin for sprinting with me at the end to keep me motivated. and thank you to @100vern for supporting whatever characterization of joshua i wanted.
tag list at the end (join here)
When your best friend, Jeonghan, suggests going away as a group of friends for a Valentineβs trip, you donβt really ask any questions. He says that he wants the trip to be more about friendships than romantic relationships and that sounds great since youβre single at the moment. You donβt hate the holiday or anything. Itβs just nice to know that youβll have something to do that doesnβt revolve around whether or not youβre dating someone. And he says that itβs all going to be planned and all you have to do is show up. Sounds pretty good to you. You give him your budget so that he can find something that works for everyone and pretend you actually had the option on whether you agreed. You donβt have the option, you know, because Jeonghan wasnβt asking. Besides, Jeonghan has been your best friend for years, so you know that itβll be fun.
It occurs to you when the trip gets closer that Jeonghan is your best friend and you really should know to ask for more details. You know better. Part of that includes just which friends that heβs invited to this trip or if there are any that youβre not also friends with. Generally speaking, Jeonghan has excellent taste in friends. Heβs intentional with his time, always has been. It also usually takes him time to get comfortable with newer people. So, when he counts someone as a close friend, you typically know itβs someone that youβre also going to like. Itβs why you have nearly identical friend circles. The one exception? His new roommate that you actually cannot stand.Β
A few months ago, someone new moved into Jeonghanβs apartment after his old roommate and a close friend of both of yours, Wonwoo, moved out to live with his girlfriend. Enter Joshua. At first appearance, heβs kind, patient, artistic, and funny. Nothing that raises any sort of red flags. All your friends seem to like him immediately and none of them can seem to understand your beef with him. Especially since he never has anything negative to say about you. It makes you feel a little crazy. But, you know that youβre not. You know that this man may be just as petty as you and you know that sometimes he fucks with you just because he can. Never anything malicious. Heβs not actually a terrible person. He just seems to delight in the fact that you donβt like him and that your friends give you a hard time over it. Canβt understand your issue when so many of them also love to fuck with you.Β
You consider backing out when Jeonghan conveniently lets you know exactly whoβs coming a few days before leaving. Up until that point, he was relatively vague. Just the standard group of friends you hang out with. Nobody that creates any sort of problems. He reminds you, when you want to back out, that the deposit is already down on the rental house and the activities are already set. Youβre locked into time off from work regardless of going or not. Plus, all the rest of your favorite people (the single ones, at least) will be there so why not just go on the trip anyway? Whatβs the worst that can happen?
You think youβre going to be revisiting that conversation a lot over the course of the trip.
By the time the trip actually comes around, youβre looking forward to it. So what if Joshua is going to be there? Itβs a decent sized group going and the listing for the house youβre staying in is beautiful. There are plenty of places for you to hang out without being on top of someone you donβt like that much. Plus, the shortened week leading up to the trip has crawled by. You need this break. Havenβt really had one since the new year started. Thankfully, youβre able to get done with your work on time and are out the door without giving anyone the chance to add more work onto your plate.Β
When you get into your car a few minutes later, after changing into something more comfortable for the ride, you take a deep breath. Half an hour later, you have another of your closest friends, Jennie, in the front seat and the pair of you are off to your getaway. Youβre happy that itβs just you and her because at least she hears you out on not liking Joshua. Doesnβt really have any suggestions, but sheβs a good ear and an even better partner in crime for the drive up. She has playlists ready, snacks packed, and even a little cooler of drinks. All of that means that you only have to stop once for a bathroom break, to get a little more gas, and to see if you can get something more resembling actual food. The car ride itself is uneventful.Β
Once you get to the house? Not so much. Based on the cars already there, you think that you and Jennie might be the last ones to show up. That only feels confirmed when you get into the house and everyone is already spread out and making themselves at home. Jeonghan is quick to come over, a little bit of alcohol on his breath, and welcome you. He lets you know that rooms arenβt decided yet and they wanted to make sure you were there before assigning anything.Β
And of course, in typical Jeonghan fashion, he has to make it a game for you to figure out where youβre all going to be sleeping. Everyone gets a quick chance to look through the rooms and see which they might want. Of course, you instantly fall in love with the feel of one room. It shouldnβt matter but the colors feel relaxing, the artwork on the walls is your style, and the beds feel comfy. You give Jennie a look that clearly says you should try to share it. Which shouldnβt be an issue because itβs not even the fanciest room. Once you all look at the rooms, you draw for numbers and Jeonghan explains that youβll go in order and stand in the room you want. If more people want a room than it fits, then theyβll have to come up with a way to decide who gets it. Itβs kind of silly, but everyone seems into it and you just go along. Find yourself getting a little excited when you get to go second, too.Β
When itβs your turn, you head straight for the room you want and let out a sigh of relief seeing itβs empty. Jennie has a higher number, so youβll have to wait to see what happens. It seems like everything is going to go well until Joshua walks into the room with that obnoxious smile on his face. You figure heβll turn around when he sees you. Instead, he smiles more and plops himself down on the free bed. You are determined not to say anything to him and just wait for Jennie to come along. Onlyβ¦she never does. Jeonghan calls through the house to say that everyone has picked their rooms and to figure it out if there are too many people in the room.
βYou look confused,β he observes and the furrow in your brow deepens.Β
βI was expectingβ¦β you start and shake your head.
βJennie?β he asks and you frown. βI mentioned that I also really wanted this room and she said she would try for a different room since I was before her.β
βTraitor,β you say under your breath.Β
βWhatβs that?β he asks, clearly amused.
βNothing,β you say. βYou could have picked another room, too, you know.βΒ
βAll we have to do here is sleep. The beds in this room are the most comfortable and theyβre facing the right way. The decorations are relaxing enough that it'll be easy to fall asleep. I want this room,β he says.Β
βBut, Iβm here,β you say kind of lamely.Β
βNot the same problem it is for me that it is for you. Youβre welcome to switch with someone else, though,β he says.
βNot aβ¦you hate me,β you say incredulously.Β
βNo, I donβt. Why would you think that?β Joshua asks and you just blink at him.Β
βBecause youβre always fucking with me,β you say stupidly.Β
Joshua tsks with that infuriating smile still firmly in place. βI promise, sweetheart, I donβt hate you and I donβt know what youβre talking about.βΒ
βButβ¦β you start as he gets to his feet.Β
βIβm going to get my bags. Do you want me to grab yours as well?β he asks. You try to splutter out a response which only makes him smile more knowingly.Β
Once you gather your thoughts, you also get up to get your own bags. He may have thrown you off for a second, but youβre stubborn and youβre not letting him win at this. Youβre not really sure what game heβs playing or why heβs messing with you this way. Youβre also not sure why Jennie let you fall into this situation without so much as a fight. Thatβs a conversation for later when you know that you wonβt be overheard. For now, youβre going to get settled in the house and have a very large drink. Tomorrow is Valentineβs Day, after all, and youβre going to need all of your strength.Β
Your first night goes much easier than you expect. There are enough people that you donβt have to directly interact with your new roommate for the trip. Then, youβre asleep before Joshua comes to bed. Somehow, heβs already out of bed before you get up. A sure sign that you managed to get peaceful sleep. Another sign that you made the right call with the bedroom. It just feels really relaxing. That peace lasts as long as it takes you to get dressed and head out into the kitchen area for coffee. Joshua looks like heβs holding court as he uses the unnecessarily elaborate coffee machine to fill everyoneβs orders. And like every other time, they all look completely happy to have him around. You cannot understand it. This is the man thatβs been terrorizing you since moving in with Jeonghan and acting like heβs an innocent little angel. Constantly telling you that he would never be chaotic or a menace. It makes you insane.Β
(Terrorizing is an incredibly strong word and the rational part of you knows that. Knows that heβs not some evil demon sent from Hell to fight with you, specifically. Knows he doesnβt fuck with you anymore than someone like Jeonghan does. The irrational part of you has decided that fighting with him is the hill youβre willing to die on. That irrational part doesnβt even consider there could be a reason for him acting the way he does with you.)
βOh this is so cute!β Jennie says as he hands over her mug with perfect latte art. You didnβt realize this was some fancy coffee house set up.Β
Joshua smiles soft, the kind that he never shows you, and pushes his glasses back up his nose. Nobody should be allowed to look that good while wearing pajama pants and a sweatshirt. But, heβs got that just rolled out of bed look that would work if you didnβt hate everything about him. His eyes land on you and his smile changes entirely. You think it looks like heβs up to something. Jennie turns around and catches sight of you.
βBabe! You have to let Shua make you coffee. Look how cute this is!β she squeals and shows off her cup as you walk over to her.Β
βShua?β you ask with a raised eyebrow.Β
βDonβt worry, you can still just call me Joshua,β he says like heβs doing you a favor.Β Β
βHow about Satan?β you ask under your breath.Β
His face lights up with that all-too-common look of mischief and you know he heard you. βYou know, I prefer Lucifer, actually.βΒ
βWhy is that?β you ask. βThey were the same.βΒ
βIn theory, maybe. But, we talk more about Lucifer being a fallen angel than Satan. Plus, it just sounds better, especially when you add Morningstar onto the end. Just a fallen star,β he says and you roll your eyes. He turns back to the coffee machine. βCoffee?β
βAre you asking me?β you say and look around. Everyone else seems to have coffee already.Β
βWho else?β he answers with a question of his own. A challenge implicit in the words
βI can make my own, thanks,β you say. βYou might put salt into it instead of sugar.βΒ
He turns around, a lock of faux outrage on his face. βWow.β
βCome on. Donβt you think thatβs a little harsh?β Jennie asks. Itβs just the three of you at the kitchen island.Β
βOh, coming from the traitor,β you say without any real heat to it.Β
Jennie shrugs, entirely unashamed. βIβm sharing with Seungcheol. He doesnβt snore and he mightβve had to share the bed with Mingyu otherwise. When Joshua said he wanted your same room, I didnβt feel like fighting when I still might lose.β
You sigh at her and Joshua just watches the exchange with more interest than you expect. βSo, where are we on letting me make your coffee?β
βFine,β you say with another sigh.Β
Jennie only chuckles under her breath as she gets up off the stool, coffee in hand. βEnjoy.β
Joshua looks at you with the same annoying smile and asks how you like your coffee. You answer him while saying as little as possible and heβs off to work. Itβs a nice break once he turns around. He canβt give you shit while heβs focusing so hard on the drink. For a second, you even forget to watch the ingredients he uses. Heβs so peaceful. Thankfully (for you, at least), you shake yourself out of it before he turns back around with your mug.Β
βHere,β he says and hands it over with the sly smile he saves for you. βHappy Valentineβs Day.βΒ
Itβs casual, the way he says it. Like the way you would say it to an acquaintance or even a newer friend. Certainly not the way you expect him to say it to you. Actually, you donβt expect to hear him say it at all. You roll your eyes for the hundredth time. βThanks, you too.β
His eyes are still on you and itβs unnerving. βArenβt you going to try it?β
The alarm bells go off in your head. Itβs so easy to imagine him fucking with you. Itβs not like you could see through his body to know what he was doing while making the coffee. If you say anything now, though, and itβs a normal cup, then youβll be the one who seems crazy. All thatβs left to do is (begrudgingly) take a sip. Which you do. It takes everything in you not to give away that itβs the best cup of coffee in your life. How does he manage to make it taste so good? How does he get perfect portions of everything?Β
You must not totally control your face because he smiles again like he can read your mind. Then he prompts the answer he must already know. βSo?β
βItβs not bad,β you say noncommittally.
βNot bad?β Seungcheol asks. Itβs beyond you how that man manages to sneak up on you. Makes you start a little. He only chuckles at that and puts a hand on your arm to steady you. βSorry, I thought you heard me.β
βItβs fine,β you say with a smile. After all, you donβt have beef with him. Jeonghan, maybe, and Joshua, definitely, but not Seungcheol. You canβt blame Jennie for saving him from sharing a bed with Mingyu when Mingyu sleeps like a starfish.
βThis is the best coffee Iβve ever had. I want to pay him to just make me a cup whenever I need it,β he jokes.Β
Joshua shrugs, feigning a humility that you know he doesnβt feel. Itβs the version of him that everyone else but you seems to get. It just feels so fake. Doesnβt occur to you that maybe itβs all the real him. That he could be both a chaos demon and a genuinely nice person all at once. Or maybe youβre getting the fake version of him.Β
βItβs nothing,β Joshua says, like the compliment makes him shy. βI worked as a barista while I was in school. Got pretty good at it because it meant better tips.βΒ
βYou know, maybe we should talk about you opening a coffee shop. I know some people who might want to invest and youβre wasting away in an office job. Youβre much better around people,β Seungcheol says.Β
You snort and quickly cover it. Although Seungcheol seems to second guess what he heard, one look at Joshua tells you he knows. His face is even again by the time the other man looks back. Leave it to Seungcheol and his giant heart to want to help someone who may not even deserve it. Before you can say anything else, you excuse yourself from the conversation with a final forced thank you. You donβt want to spend the whole weekend feeling crazy any time someone sees you bickering with Joshua.Β With a whole weekend like this, heβs bound to show his true colors. And youβll be waiting for that moment. No, you donβt think thatβs crazy at all. Itβs just how it has to be.
The rest of the morning and afternoon pass in kind of a blur. You and Jennie offer to do the big grocery shopping trip to get everything on the communal list. There had been a little bit of food, some drinks, and plenty of coffee. But, you need food for the rest of the weekend, especially with tonight being a meal in the house to avoid the insanity of Valentineβs Day crowds. Shopping the night before just hadnβt been on the agenda either. So, you and Jennie head out to brave any last minute shoppers with a (slightly longer than expected) list of what you think youβll need the rest of the weekend.
Once you get back, Jeonghan is quick to take over while ushering you off to hang out in the living room. Youβre not sure if he unpacks the groceries, or, more realistically, gets someone else to handle it. Thatβs definitely something nice about having a house full of people. Thereβs no shortage of helping hands. Itβs just nice to get to sit for a minute. The grocery store had been busier than expected. You donβt mind crowds, neither does Jennie. Thereβs just something about holidays that seems to bring out the worst in those that are out last minute.Β
It seems like people have scattered while you were at the store. The weather doesnβt quite feel warm enough to be outside. It is sunny, though, and that seems like enough to pull some of your friends outside to kick a ball around. Definitely not something that appeals to you. Instead, you drift over to join Jun and Jeonghan playing a boardgame. Most of your friends have a rule against playing games with Jeonghan because heβs not above cheating for fun. Or just to win since he can be competitive. Thatβs never been a rule you bothered with. Itβs just as fun for you to see his reactions when you donβt react to his cheating. That can be more fun than the game itself. Besides, youβre pretty good at a lot of the games he plays. Itβs a safe option while Joshua is outside.Β
Eventually, Jun has to excuse himself from your games. Not really a big loss to Jeonghan since Jun really only joined for the vibes and because running around outside felt like too much work. As the afternoon slips away, he leaves to join Mingyu in the kitchen. The two of them are tackling dinner for the entire group. A fact youβre all happy with since theyβre both incredible cooks. You, personally, are less excited when Joshua plops into Junβs vacated seat, freshly showered after being outside. His hair is still wet as he shakes it out a little and runs a hand through it to get it out of his face.Β
βWhatβs with the glasses today?β Jeonghan asks and Joshua rolls his eyes.Β
βI wear glasses a lot. Are you saying that youβre not just always staring at my face?β Joshua retorts. Jeonghan is the only other person Joshua ever messes around with. But, itβs very different than with you. Those two banter. Sass each other back and forth. Joshua genuinely fucks with you. At least, thatβs how it feels to you.
Jeonghan narrows his eyes at his roommate and glances over at you for some reason. Even as long as youβve been friends, you still canβt read the look on your best friendβs face. It looks like heβs putting something together and you have no idea what. Arenβt sure you want to know, honestly. He and Joshua may not have been roommates long, but Jeonghan considers them two peas in a pod. Yet, somehow everyone knows Jeonghan is a demon with a kind heart, while nobody thinks Joshua is anything but sweet.Β
βPlease tell me you didnβt wear glasses soβ¦β your best friend starts, only to be quickly cut off.Β
βI thought we were playing games over here,β Joshua interrupts. Although Jeonghan narrows his eyes, he doesnβt comment further. Weird.Β
βIβll leave the roommates to it,β you say flatly and start to stand up. Jeonghan grabs your arm gently, so you could pull away if you wanted. Itβs just to get your attention.
βCome on, you canβt abandon us. The games are more fun with more than two people,β he says. Gives you that angelic smile you still havenβt figured out how to ignore after years of friendship.
βI was going toβ¦β you start and trail off when a good excuse eludes you.
βWhat?β Jeonghan challenges with that sparkle in his eye. βHelp in the kitchen? Watch whatever Jennie is trying to teach Cheol? Let Soonyoung corner you the way he probably cornered Jihoon and Sana to talk about his idea to adopt a tiger?βΒ
βHeβs a menace,β you protest weakly, glancing briefly at Joshua. Heβs been watching the exchange with clear interest and this makes him laugh.
βJeonghan is your best friend!β he says while holding back a laugh.Β
βYeah, but everyone knows heβs a menace,β you start.
βHey!β
βOh you are, Hannie, donβt deny it.βΒ
βStill.β He pouts at you and you know it means heβs not actually upset. He is a menace and the most loyal person you know. Itβs fine.Β
βYou, on the other hand,β you say, turning to Joshua. He gives you a look of polite interest. βYouβre a menace and everyone thinks youβre an angel.β
βI am an angel,β he says with a shrug.
βEvery day the universe tests my patience,β you say under your breath.Β
βJust play with us,β Jeonghan says and you sigh.
βFine.β
In some ways, it is actually funnier than playing with Jun. Joshua tries to be stealthy as he cheats, but youβre best friends with Jeonghan and youβve absolutely seen it all. The normal rules go out the window and you all try to see who can be the sneakiest in cheating for an advantage. Your best friend receives a shock with how well you keep pace. Not that it should be surprising. You pick things up with Jeonghan in your life. Despite how much fun youβre having, you stop just short of admitting that. Canβt let Joshua have the satisfaction.Β
Eventually, itβs time for everyone to head back to their rooms to get ready for dinner. Even though youβre staying in, everyone wants to get dressed up. Pretend youβre all fancy for no real reason. You let Joshua go back to the room first. He and Sana are relieving Mingyu and Jun so that they can also get ready for dinner. At least you have the confidence neither of them will burn anything. Heβs changed by the time you return to the room and sit down on your bed to do your makeup.Β
βTrying to impress someone?β he asks, voice low in a way thatβs unfamiliar to you.Β
It makes you glance up at him sharply, searching to understand the tone. He doesnβt have his standard sly grin on his face and itβs a little disarming. Instead, heβs studying your face. βSometimes I just like to look nice.βΒ
Joshua turns to grab his watch and says something under his breath. Something so quiet that you canβt hear it even looking right at him. Canβt read his lips either since youβre looking at his profile. He seems so concentrated and, for once, unguarded. It gives you a moment to take him in when you usually try not to linger on him for more than a moment. Heβs wearing a crisp dress shirt with the top few buttons undone. Just the right amount of casual and dressy. Your eyes linger on his necklace that should look a little too fine or thin, yet somehow works on him. Itβs an interesting combination. Something you might expect to see on Jeonghan with all his delicate features. Lost in your consideration of the piece of jewelry, you miss the moment Joshua finishes fastening this watch and looks back up.
βWere you staring at me?β he asks and youβre not surprised to hear his usual tone back. Maybe a little cockiness thrown in for good measure.
βYour necklace, actually,β you answer. It comes out much more smooth than you feel after being caught staring at your enemy.Β
He chuckles and touches a hand to it. Runs a careful finger along the chain. Then, he smirks at you and you know thereβs no good that can come from that. βMaybe if youβre good, Iβll let you borrow it.βΒ
A million things run through your head at that statement. None of them can come out of your mouth, though. βArenβt you supposed to be helping Sana in the kitchen so our lovely chefs can get ready?β
βSure,β he agrees easily and you like that tone even less. Itβs like he knows some kind of secret that youβre not in on. Itβs unnerving. He turns to the door before giving you a chance to say anything else. βSee you at dinner.βΒ
What the hell was that?
You finish getting ready and head out into the dining area to find Jennie and Soonyoung setting the table. As seems to be usual, he has entirely too much energy for such a simple task. Itβs kind of endearing, really. Everything with him around the group feels exciting, even the boring things. Jeonghan is just behind them with little name cards to assign you where to sit. You would roll your eyes if it werenβt so completely him. Though, he seems to have taken at least a partial night off from causing problems on purpose. Your seat is between Jennie and Jihoon, which seems harmless enough. Knowing Ji, he may not even have much to say.Β
As something to do, you help bring food to the table. Everything looks amazing. Not that itβs a surprise. If Seungcheol wants to pay Joshua to make him coffee every day, you wish you could pay Mingyu to cook all your meals. Even as the one who went grocery shopping, you arenβt expecting this. Thereβs an assortment of dishes, both hot and cold, with something seemingly from every food group. And it smells even better than it looks. Everyone loads up their plates and takes their assigned seats. Naturally, Jeonghan sits at the head. And, of course, Joshua is sitting across from you. Not directly across from you, no. Jeonghan has him sitting across from Jennie. It seems deliberate since youβre far more likely to turn to chat with Jennie than Jihoon. But, nothing should ruin your mood or this dinner. Instead, you heap your praise on Mingyu and Jun before digging in. Just kind of follow the conversation as it goes.Β
Dinner is just as amazing as you imagined it would be. Even cleaning up after dinner goes quickly. And then itβs to the part of the night Jeonghan seems most excited about: drinking and playing games. Multiple people veto Soonyoungβs request to play strip poker, causing him to pout. So, Seungcheol jumps in with another card game where you can all drink and keep your clothes on. Someone seems to mutter that everyone keeping their clothes on is boring, earning a chuckle. Still, you all settle around a large coffee table and start drinking. Jihoon joins once he gets a playlist going for background music.Β
The game lasts longer than you expect before Soonyoung starts to lose interest again. And he doesnβt seem to be alone. Heβs giggling along with Jun and Sana, the lightest of the lightweights in the group when it comes to drinking. None of them are really paying attention to their turns, but how can you be mad? Theyβre all so cute. So happy.
βOh I know!β Soonyoung says, volume several settings too loud.
βInside voice, Soonie,β Sana giggles.
βWe should play truth or dare,β he says. Itβs still a bit too loud, but at least your ears donβt hurt.
βSoonyoung, weβre adults,β Jihoon says, only a slight flush to his cheeks showing heβs been drinking.
βWhich makes it even more fun,β Jun chimes in.Β
Jihoon looks around for support. Looks for someone else to object. Most people only shrug. You all know that Soonyoung is going to get what he wants. Heβs got a cute pout and he never asks for anything that would actually make someone uncomfortable. Why not play a silly game while drinking with friends on a getaway to forget none of you are in relationships at the moment? What could possibly go wrong?
The first few rounds, as always, are pretty mild. Nobody wants to be the first one to cross the line into something a little raunchier. Then the drinks keep flowing and people seem to get a little looser. Soonyoung gives Sana a lap dance that has the entire group on the edge of their seats. Jihoon has to admit that he wrote half a dozen songs about a crush on Sana when he first got started (which earns him a kiss on the cheek from the woman in question). Mingyu has to share a sexual fantasy. Sana has to suck on someoneβs fingers (and picks Jihoon, which makes his cheeks flush). Around and around it goes with the only constant being that neither option is safer. It all depends on whoβs asking and who theyβre asking. The majority of what comes out is known to at least part of the group since most of you have been friends for years. Itβs also all in good fun while the drinks flow.Β
βJoshua, truth or dare?β Jeonghan says and his roommate seems delighted.
βDare, obviously,β he says without a second thought.
You roll your eyes and take a drink while you watch Jeonghan pretend to consider. Itβs an act, one you know well. He knows what heβs going to say and it comes out a second later. βI dare you to whisper in someoneβs ear til they blush.β
βSomething dirty?β Joshua asks.Β
Jeonghan just shrugs. βUp to you about whatever you think will work best.β
Joshua casts his eyes around the group like heβs actually considering. You figure heβll probably pick someone whose cheeks are already a bit flushed from drinking. Make it easier on himself. Thatβs what Jeonghan would do, at least. Itβs only when you realize that heβs moving towards you that you get a little nervous. Jennie offers you a smile before getting up so that he can sit next to you. You really need to get better friends. It should be fine, though, because you donβt blush that easily. Definitely not because of someone you donβt even like.Β
Your other friends seem to move a little further away, too. Maybe so they can see better or maybe so they donβt hear what he says. This is a test of wills and itβs one you intend to win as you give him the most neutral look. Unfortunately, he surprises you right from the start by gently taking hold of your chin and turning your face away from him. His fingers are just as gentle when they push your hair away from your ear. Itβs the way you treat someone you actually like, not someone you constantly terrorize. The warmth from his breath tickles you as he leans into your ear.Β
βYou think you have me fooled. Want me to think that you canβt stand me,β he begins and youβre already fighting off a shiver. His voice is low, as smooth as honey and just as sweet. He keeps a hand around the back of your head and one in front of his own face to create the illusion of privacy. Even though nobody else could hear him with his voice so low.Β
βI know, though. I know thereβs a very fine line between hate andβ¦desire. I saw the way you looked at my necklace earlier. Tracked the way you watched my fingers slide along the smooth chain. Were you imagining what else my fingers could do? Maybe you want to imagine them sliding across your lips. Iβd do it if all our friends werenβt watching. Or maybe you were thinking about having my fingers ghost over your neck. Applying feather light pressure.βΒ
Itβs getting harder for you to keep your cool. Thereβs a slideshow of the least sexy images that you can conjure playing in your mind. You cannot lose this to Joshua, of all people. Anyone else, fine. Just not him.
βHmm. Or maybe itβs my mouth that gets you going. That mouth thatβs always terrorizing you. Always seems to have something to say. Do you want to know what it feels like pressed into your skin? Do you want to imagine me dipping my head down from your ear? Can you imagine me sucking a mark into the soft skin of your neck and then soothing you by running my tongue over the spot? I will keep kissing down your skin. Finding every spot that makes you moan. I bet you make the sweetest soundsβ¦β
βBESTIE!β Jeonghan says, nearly shrieking with delight. βOh my god, I cannot believe he got you!β
Joshua pulls away with the worst grin youβve ever seen and you just huff out in annoyance. Cross your arms and firmly look anywhere but Joshua. Itβs all you can do to try and calm down the rapid beating of your heart. You shake your head and then glare at your best friend.
βWhat was he saying?β Mingyu asks, feeding too much into bullshit.Β
βThatβs between us,β Joshua says as he gets up to return to his original seat.Β
βCannot believe he managed to make our strongest soldier blush like that,β Sana says through a giggle.Β
βIs she?β Joshua asks Sana, seeming genuinely intrigued. Sana raises her eyebrows in question. βOur strongest soldier?β
βYeah, nothing gets her, usually,β Mingyu says and you cast a look at him for betraying you.
βIt was like he was reading some smutty book to me. I wasnβt even thinking about it being him,β you say with a pout.
βSure, sure,β Jeonghan says dismissively and turns to his roommate. βYour turn.βΒ
Part of you expects him to turn it right back on you given the look on his face. He surprises you, though, and turns over to Sana. You space out on whatever the truth or dare is. Kind of canβt think about anything other than the things Joshua whispered into your ear. You know he didnβt mean any of it. Thereβs no world where Joshua wants to do any of those things with you. And no world where you want him too, either, you remind yourself. It just kills you that he won this round. You refocus just in time to hear Sana direct the next question to you.
βTruth or dare?β she asksΒ
Sana is trustworthy. Not someone out to get you, so itβs easy to answer. βDare.β
βKiss the most attractive personβ¦β she starts, only to get an elbow to the side from Soonyoung. βSorry, I want you to kiss the most attractive guy on the lips for at least 5 seconds. Jennie and I are off the table.βΒ
βWhat would it take to get you on the table?β Seungcheol jokes and somehow keeps it from sounding sleazy.Β
You roll your eyes and look around the group. All of your friends are pretty, which makes something like this hard. Easy to overthink, too. Thatβs when it hits you. Quickly rising, you make it seem like youβre heading towards Joshua. His face shows surprise for the briefest moment. At the last second, you curve towards Mingyu.Β
βCan I kiss you?βΒ
He chuckles, catching onto your game immediately. βNot like itβs the first time.βΒ
You lean in and press a kiss to his lips. Itβs nothing that deep, but you do make sure it lasts longer than five seconds. When you pull away, Joshua seems to be watching intently. Even follows you back to your seat.Β
βHey, now why does Mingyu get to be the most attractive?β Soonyoung protests with a pout.
βMaybe because heβs a literal model?β Jennie says with a laugh.Β
βDetails,β Soonyoung says dismissively.Β
During the exchange you look back at Joshua and tune out the bickering. You find his eyes already on you, an unreadable look on his face. βTruth or dare?β
Joshuaβs eyes widen. βMe?βΒ
βMhm,β you hum in agreement.
His eyes narrow, just for a second. βTruth.βΒ
βWhatβs your most embarrassing sex story?βΒ
The question seems to catch him further off guard and youβre not sure what he expected you to ask. Maybe he thought you would ask about why heβs always terrorizing you. This is infinitely better, though. The way he answers will tell you a lot about him.Β
He actually launches into a legitimate story. Apparently, he had been dating someone and wanted to spice things up a little in the relationship. So, he let himself into her apartment to set up a little dinner for them and then stripped down to a sexy waiter outfit. Just cuffs, a collar, and the tiniest underwear known to man. The only problem was that she didnβt know that he was setting up the surprise and showed up back at her place with her parents, who he had not even met yet. He was never able to recover from it and they broke up. Itβs not technically a sex story, but you let him have it because itβs definitely embarrassing.Β
The game carries on once again. The truths and dares get bolder until someone reels it back in with something a little tamer and the cycle resets. You think you might be in the clear, even though your mind still lingers in places you wish it wouldnβt. If your friends can tell youβre zoning out, they donβt call you on it. Youβre actually surprised the game has gone on this long with everyone drinking and being silly. Itβs kind of nice too, though, to get to take a break from real world responsibilities. Thereβs a lightness to the whole night that makes you warm. At least, thatβs what youβre deciding has you feeling the way you are.
βOkay, last one and then weβre moving onto a drinking game,β Seungcheol says.Β
βBossy,β Jennie comments and earns a smattering of chuckles.Β
βYou up for it?β Seungcheol asks Joshua.
βSure, dare,β he says without missing a beat.Β
βNo more of this whispering in her ear to make her blush, I want to see an actual kiss,β Seungcheol says and looks right at you.
βExcuse me?β you ask. Heβs the last person you imagine engaging in whatever this is that the rest of your friends are up to.
βI could cut the tension with a knife and I just wanna see if itβs one sided,β he says, unapologetic.Β
βDidnβt take you as the type who liked to watch,β Jeonghan says, shit-eating grin taking over his face.
βOh, Iβm into all sorts of things, but we can talk about that later,β Seungcheol says with a wink at Jeonghan. You forget, sometimes, that he can be just as insufferable as your best friend. He turns back to you. βYou can back out, though.β
Joshua is watching you for your reaction and his face is unreadable. Itβs impossible to tell if he actually wants to do this or if heβs just going along with the game. You know that he wonβt follow through if you say no, though. Maybe itβs the drinks coursing through you, but it doesnβt feel like the worst thing in the world. The buzz in your veins is pleasant and you know youβre still totally in control.Β
βWell?β Joshua presses when you donβt say anything.
You try to seem unaffected again by rolling your eyes. Can tell by the looks you get that it doesnβt really work. So, you huff out a short reply. βFine.βΒ
For the second time tonight, Joshua rises from his seat and crosses to you. Jennie doesnβt even get a chance to move this time because he reaches a hand to you and pulls you to your feet. Itβs gentle again, just like he was when he whispered filth into your ear. Almost cautiously, he puts one hand on your waist, sliding it along so itβs on your back as he pulls you into him. His other hand rests on your cheek and then he kisses you. Not just a peck like youβre expecting. His lips are impossibly soft and it takes everything in you not to sink further into it. To fight the way your body wants to respond to his touch. The next second, he pulls back. When you meet his eyes, itβs the first time you can remember seeing him look like that. Soft, unguarded, curious. The mask slips back into place when he steps away.
βSatisfied?β Joshua asks Seungcheol.
βOh, definitely.βΒ
Nobody says anything about the kiss as you move into whatever drinking game Seungcheol picks to play next. There are plenty of looks that both you and Joshua miss, though. Itβs almost like seeing the version of Joshua that all your friends talk about. The one who could be kind and thoughtful. Funny and supportive. All the sides youβre very convinced are reserved for anyone but you. It makes your head spin in a way that has nothing to do with the alcohol in your system. It fills you with questions, too. Why did he kiss you like that? Itβs the kind of first kiss everyone wants. One thatβs full of promises and meaning. One that sets the tone for everything going forward.Β
Itβs going to spiral you back into annoyance again if youβre not careful. Itβs all just a game to him, right? Just another way to mess with you and get you to think about wanting him. Another way to show that heβs somehow in control of this whole dynamic. Thatβs a win you canβt give him. So, you dial yourself back into the present and into the game. Make sure to act like everything is fine. And it is. Youβre definitely not thinking about the things Joshua whispered in your ear now that you know exactly what his lips feel like on yours.Β
The next morning comes brighter than youβre expecting. Then, you realize itβs not that early after all. A side effect of staying up into the early hours of the morning having the best night with your friends. Your head feels a little fuzzy from drinking. Could be a lot worse. Thankfully, you drank a ton of water and took a couple painkillers to hedge your bets, so you wake up without a hangover. Sometimes, past-you really does look out for future-you.
In the other bed, Joshua shifts. You freeze, not entirely ready to deal with him before even wiping the sleep from your eyes. Instead, he just rolls over and his breathing stays even. Itβs that steady rhythm of someone sleeping soundly. He looks younger, somehow, while heβs sleeping. Or maybe itβs just that heβs completely relaxed. No time for scheming or terrorizing you. Thereβs an innocence that almost makes you forget the war between you and him. Almost.Β
After you brush your teeth and wash your face, you decide to see if anyone else in the house is awake. The whole house is quiet, though. Not surprising. You always seem to be the first one awake after a night drinking and this is supposed to be a vacation. Thereβs no point in waking anyone up when you donβt have plans until later. So, you decide to grab your book, an oversized hoodie that you stole from one of your friends, and one of the blankets from the living room before heading outside. Thereβs a chill in the air, though not itβs not as bad as the previous day. Thereβs also heating units on the patio that you can turn on before settling down.Β
Itβs the perfect cozy morning. The heaters and the blanket keep you just warm enough without it being uncomfortable. The world around you is calm, peaceful in a way it never could be in a city. A breeze gently rustles through the trees. Birds call out to each other. There arenβt any of those sounds that people contribute. You get lost in the fictional world and the vivid imagery, completely unaware of anything going on around you.Β
At least until a voice interrupts your thoughts. A voice thatβs quickly becoming too recognizable.Β
βI brought you coffee,β he says and holds out a steaming mug.Β
Without consciously making the decision, you move your legs on the couch, allowing him to sit down on the other end. He has his own mug that he blows gently across before taking a sip. Your eyes study his profile for a moment before taking a sip of your own.
βThank you,β you say without the normal bite.Β
βI made it the same as yesterday, hope thatβs okay,β he says. Heβs still facing forward and you canβt really place why. Or why it bothers you that heβs not looking over at you when youβre not even friends.Β
You sigh. βYou make incredible coffee. You donβt need me to tell you that.β
The side of his mouth that you can see quirks into a smile. Probably a smug one, knowing him. Then he does actually turn to face you and, of course, his eyes sparkle. βStill nice to hear.βΒ
βYes, Joshua, you are the coffee god,β you say with heavy sarcasm.
You set the coffee down on the table long enough so that you can mark the place in your book with the receipt youβre using as a bookmark and set it aside. Somehow, this seems to interest him, even though it seems like the most mundane thing. Instead of trying to figure out whatβs going on in his head, you just pick your coffee back up and resume drinking in peace. A peace that only lasts a moment.
βYou can tell a lot about someone by how they handle their books,β he says.Β
That gets your attention even though you know itβs meant to bait you into a conversation. βIs that so?βΒ
βProbably not,β he says with a light laugh. βBut, I like that you donβt dog-ear your pagesβ¦β
βA crime.βΒ
βAnd I use receipts as bookmarks, too. Sometimes, from when I buy the books if they donβt just email it to me or otherwise, just one I have lying around. I canβt ever seem to remember an actual bookmark, but who doesnβt have receipts lying around?β
βThatβs true,β you concede. Joshua takes another sip of his coffee and shivers a little, even though heβs also got a sweatshirt one. One of Jeonghanβs, you think, because you know youβve seen him in it. βHere.βΒ
βWhat?β he asks and turns to you. Youβre pushing the edge of the blanket towards him with your foot. Itβs plenty big enough to share.
βYou brought me coffee. Iβm not going to let you shiver,β you say and he smiles at you. One of the real ones that youβre not used to.Β
βThanks,β he says and pulls it toward his lap.Β
βIβm surprised youβre not inside making everyone else coffee, too.βΒ
βNobody else is awake yet. Or, I didnβt see anyone. I thought I heard voices, couldβve been a TV in one of the rooms. But it seemed so peaceful out here and I figuredβ¦β
βYouβd come bug me?βΒ
The look he gives you is a little exasperated. Something new on his face. Joshua reaches into the pouch of his sweatshirt and pulls out a book. Itβs a title and an author you donβt recognize. You wonder what you might be able to learn from his reading habits.Β
βI thought I might read, too,β he says instead and glances at your book. βYou know, not what I pictured you reading.βΒ
Several responses war in your head, all wanting to come out. You look over at the book to buy yourself a minute to see which answer wins out. βI like fantasy. Itβs nice to escape into a world that isnβt real.βΒ
βThat doesnβt surprise me,β he says, seemingly pleased that youβre not being snarky.Β
βSo, why not this, then?β you ask. It hits you that maybe he pays more attention to you than you realize. Maybe thatβs why heβs so good at getting under your skin. A thought occurs to you. βIf you say you think Iβd prefer sparkly vampires, I will end you.β
That makes him laugh, loud and clear. Like heβs not concerned about coming off a certain way. Itβs a nice sound, you think. βNo, thatβs not what I was thinking. I was thinking more fantasy mixed with some kind of dystopia. Not something set in the Middle East.βΒ
βI do like that, too,β you admit grudgingly. βHave you read this one? It was out on a fantasy table at the bookstore and it just sounded interesting.β
βNot yet, maybe youβll let me borrow it,β he says with that smirk that reminds you just what a pain he can be.
βWeβre definitely not at book sharing,β you deadpan, falling right into the trap without realizing.
βSo we can swap spit but you wonβt share a book with me?βΒ
βEw.βΒ
βI know the kiss wasnβt so bad that youβre saying ew about it.βΒ
You pull your legs closer into yourself and wrap your hands more tightly around the mug for both warmth and comfort. Regard him for a moment and decide how you want to go forward. Thereβs something about the setting that makes it feel like the two of you are in your own little bubble. Like you can say things you wouldnβt with your other friends around. Even though you know that you can see the patio from inside, it feels more private. Less on display than you and Joshua were the night before during the game. Somewhere along the chat, Joshua has also turned to face you and crossed his legs in front of him.
βI donβt understand you,β you admit after a moment.Β
βI didnβt think I was complicated,β he says.Β
βYou hate meβ¦β
βIβve already told you I donβt.βΒ
βBut you picked me to make blush even though there were better options and then kissed me without hesitation.β Joshua opens his mouth, a smart retort on his lips, youβre sure. So youβre quick to cut him off. βAnd donβt say it was just a dare. I didnβt kiss Mingyu that way and I got to pick whoever I wanted.βΒ
That makes him snap his mouth shut briefly. He takes a slow sip of coffee, seemingly to buy himself a moment to reconsider what to say. Itβs hell on you, though, because seeing his lips on the mug reminds you of the way his lips felt against yours last night.Β
βI donβt hate you,β he repeats to start. βI was maybe a little envious, at the beginning, of your relationship with Jeonghan and the rest of that friend group. Iβve always made friends easily, but this felt different. I know we all joke about it, but Jeonghan and I must have been friends in another life. And I saw how everyone also loved you and joked around with you, but you werenβt like that with me. So it felt a little like I was still on the outside of this group I loved.βΒ
βWho all love you, too, for the record,β you say with a sigh.
βYou donβt, though,β he presses.
βBecause you terrorize me!β you say without any real heat.Β
βSo does Jeonghan,β he points out.Β
βHe gets best friend privileges,β you say. βAnd he doesnβt fuck with me like you do.βΒ
βI watched him eat your ice cream out of the freezer and try to convince you that it wasnβt ever yours. And that he had no idea what happened to yours,β he deadpans and you immediately close your mouth, forgetting what you wanted to say.
βIβ¦okay, yeah, he does fuck with me,β you concede.
βI figured if you already didnβt like me, I might as well have a little fun,β he says with a shrug. You can see the smile tugging at the corner of his lips, though.Β
βAnd irritating me, then pretending you havenβt done anything is fun to you?βΒ
βYeah, actually.β
You huff out in annoyance. βAt least you admit that Iβm not crazy.βΒ
βNow, thatβs not all my doing.βΒ
Youβre about to snap back at him when you catch sight of the look on his face. Heβs just needling you again. Like he has been since moving in with your best friend. So, you switch tactics, hoping to catch him off guard. βStill doesnβt explain the dares last night.β
Joshua gives you a look thatβs almost a little sympathetic. Like thereβs something right in front of you that you canβt really figure out. It instantly makes you want to wipe it off him. βLike I said, I like to annoy you. Youβre even hotter when youβre annoyed.β
βExcuseβ¦β you start.
The door opens behind you and Jennie pokes her head out. βBrunch is ready, lovebirds.β
βWeβre notβ¦β you try to start again.
Joshua is too quick, though. Giving you that obnoxious smirk and slowly moving the blanket off his lap. βThanks for sharing your blanket with me, sweetheart.β
With that, heβs up and heading inside before your brain can even catch up. God, heβs so fucking infuriating that itβs going to make you crazy. But, as youβre gathering your things to head inside for brunch, and ignoring Jennieβs pointed look, you consider that maybe you did just get to know a lot more about Joshua than you realized.Β
After brunch, everyone gets ready to head out to the action park. This had been a Soonyoung and Jun suggestion, but everyone seems pretty interested. Since theyβre the only ones who have been to one before, youβre not entirely sure what to expect just from the website. In person, itβs actually really cool. They have go karts, bumper cars, indoor mini golf, rock climbing and ropes courses, small ziplines, laser tag, and even more things that you canβt really put a name to. Thereβs definitely something for everyone and it lets you split off to go do whatever seems the most interesting.Β
Youβre barely in the door before Soonyoung and Jun are running off giggling. Jeonghan peels off to go karts. Heβs not a great driver, but heβs as competitive as they come and itβs definitely something he can try to win at. A little surprising, especially with mini golf being right there, but whatever floats his boat. You try to drag Mingyu along with you to the zip line, figuring itβs not that high and maybe itβll help him work on his fear of heights. Youβre a little surprised that you get him to agree eventually. More surprised still that he actually seems to enjoy it. From the top of the zipline, you see that Jun and Soonyoung are playing some teenagers in laser tag, giggling in a way that has you concerned for the teenagers. Those two are devious with games like that.Β
Itβs the perfect kind of relaxing afternoon thatβs also engaging. You try out as many things as you can and just get lost in the fun of it all. Donβt really think about Joshua or your earlier conversation. Definitely donβt feel any kind of way when the person securing his harness lingers a little longer than necessary, seemingly flirting with him. Itβs too far away to tell if heβs flirting back. Not that you should care, either way. The distraction lets Jeonghan ram into the side of your bumper car and forces you back into your mission of chasing after your best friend.Β
Several hours later, your whole group is ready to leave. Itβs been a lot of fun, but nobody wants to get completely worn out. Especially when you have dinner reservations at a nice restaurant and then plans for an escape room after that. So, you pile back into your cars and head back to the house to get ready again. Joshua lets you have the bathroom to get ready because you want to take a quick shower without washing your hair. Heβs not going out of his way to fuck with you and itβs a bit disarming. Still, itβs better than before, right?Β
Dinner is even better than expected, but youβre careful not to praise it too much. Canβt have Mingyu pouting over thinking the professional chef does a better job than him (even though it is literally the chefβs job). Nobody drinks too much, either. Except itβs not because you drank the night before. No. Jeonghan, like the true chaos demon that he is, tells you at dinner that itβs actually two escape rooms because itβs too easy with 10 people and youβll be splitting into two groups. So, itβs kind of like a competition to see who finishes first. That sharpens everyoneβs attention. Well, after Soonyoung makes a joke about finishing first, of course. You can tell that people are looking around and wondering who the best teammates are going to be or how youβre going to split up.
Somehow, your friends let you and Jeonghan be on the same team, which feels like an unfair advantage when the two of you do these a lot. Itβs been a tradition of yours for years, even now when theyβre not as popular anymore. Itβs a little surprising that Joshua doesnβt press about also being paired up with you. It seems like the perfect chance to give you a hard time and you know he wants to win. He just heads to the other group without a word, though. It hits you while youβre getting ready to start your room that he also left you alone during the entirety of dinner. Weird. But, then the timer starts and nothing else matters.Β
Soonyoung whines the whole way back to the house about how unfair it was to have to go against you and Jeonghan. Itβs good natured, though. He admits that he still had fun even if his team only made it out with a few minutes to spare. Your team had over 10 minutes to spare, by comparison, so it hadnβt exactly been a close fight. The bickering picks back up again when you get out of your cars and Soonyoung can argue with Jeonghan again. Itβs incredibly endearing to watch them that way. Fills your heart with warmth. This really is the perfect weekend away with friends.Β
βOh, I brought my karaoke machine!β Soonyoung says as everyone is dispersing into the house.
βSoonyoungβ¦β you start, exasperated.
βIβm in!β Jun squeals and Soonyoung is off to retrieve it without another comment.
βIβll start mixing up some drinks,β Sana says with an affectionate sigh.Β
βIβll help,β Jennie agrees.Β
Even though nobody else shows any enthusiasm, you all get sucked into the mess with the promise of drinks. Soonyoung actually doesnβt have a bad voice at all when heβs not trying to be as ridiculous as possible. Itβs nice, though, because this isnβt the kind of thing you canβt do at home when you share walls with other people. Or not the kind of thing you should do. Soonyoung, in particular, does not need any more noise complaints.Β
Jeonghan takes the seat next to you and itβs comforting to have him there, even if itβs not exactly a quiet moment. The two of you go over some of the more difficult clues from the escape room and wonder if you could have gotten through the other room just as fast. Figure you probably could because the difficulty levels were the same. The two of you are nothing if not confident in your abilities. Somewhere during the conversation, Joshua plops down on Jeonghanβs other side and shares what it had been like in their room. More chaotic than yours, by the sounds of it.Β
βHey, I didnβt ask,β Jeonghan says suddenly, turning to Joshua. βI saw you were getting some extra attention from that worker putting your harness on for the rock climbing wall.β
βAh, it was nothing,β Joshua says dismissively.Β
βIt didnβt seem like nothing,β Jeonghan presses, ever the pest.
Joshua gives him a look that seems to convey a silent conversation. Itβs strange to see when youβre so used to doing that with Jeonghan yourself. βShe was just asking about our plans and if we needed any suggestions or wanted a guide to anything.β
βSo, she was hitting on you,β Jeonghan concludes, smug for a reason you donβt understand.
βMaybe,β Joshua says with a shrug. βI told her it was a friends trip and that we were set.β
βNot interested?β Jeonghan presses.
βNo,β Joshua says without explaining.Β
βCanβt imagine why,β Jeonghan says like he knows a secret. You recognize the tone well. What you donβt recognize is what the secret is.Β
βIβm gonna go get a refill,β Joshua says and stands up abruptly.
βWhat was that?β you ask, watching Joshua as he retreats into the kitchen.
Jeonghan only shrugs like he doesnβt know whatβs going on. You might believe it on anyone else, but you know better with him. βI think Iβm going to go see if Soonyoung wants to do a duet.β
With that nonanswer, Jeonghan also stands and heads over to see what Soonyoung has for song options in the app heβs using to connect to the machine. Something about the whole interaction feels off. And though you still donβt know if you even like Joshua, you get up to follow him into the empty kitchen. At least, youβre going to continue telling yourself youβre not sure if you like him.Β
βAre you okay?β you ask and he turns at your voice.
βFine, why?β he asks. Itβs not how he normally interacts with you.
βI donβt know, you just seem off,β you say. βJeonghan can be a shit sometimes, butβ¦β
βBut, youβll give him a pass and not me,β Joshua finishes and it pulls you up short. βSorry, Iβ¦β
βNo, youβre right,β you agree and that does surprise him.Β
βAre you okay?β he asks and starts to slip back into his more normal self. βAdmitting, Iβm right? I should check your temperature. Or should I call my family? Is the world ending?β
βYouβre impossible,β you grumble. You turn away from him to refill your own drink.
You can feel his presence rather than hear it over the sounds from the living room. Know he moves to stand right behind you. βAnd you missed me messing with you today, admit it.β
His voice is low again and entirely too close to your ear. You hate the way you have to fight your reaction to him. Hate the way he flips a switch and sends you spiraling like this. You canβt admit that it felt weird to not have him messing with you. Wonβt admit that you fell right into his trap with him being short. It even occurs to you that Jeonghan might have helped set the whole thing up. After all, who knows you better than your best friend?
βI wouldnβt go that far,β you say.Β
βIf you ask me to stop messing with you, then I will,β he says, still standing just behind you with his mouth near your ear. βIf you tell me that you genuinely canβt stand it after last night and after we talked this morning, then I promise Iβll leave you alone.βΒ Β
βAnd if I donβt ask you to stop?β you ask, so quietly that youβre not sure heβll hear you over the din. He does, though. His soft chuckle is confirmation of that before he steps away.
βThen, Iβll be very happy to keep seeing more sides of you,β he says.
By the time you actually turn around, heβs retreating back into the living room. You almost could convince yourself that you imagined the whole thing. Then, he looks over his shoulder and winks at you. Itβs infuriating. Heβs infuriating. Heβs also confusing. This weird dynamic between you has definitely shifted and you realize itβs up to you to set the new boundaries. But, if itβs up to you to set the boundaries, then why does it feel like heβs still pulling all the strings?
Youβre kind of in a daze while you try to process whatβs actually going on. Outwardly, you keep sipping on your drinks and laugh along when Soonyoung does something particularly ridiculous in the name of karaoke. It seems, to most of your friends, at least, that youβre fully present. You refuse Jeonghanβs request to sing with him, like you always do. Itβs just for fun, but heβs actually got an angelic singing voice when he wants to put effort in and youβre more of a sing in the shower type. Itβs just friends, sure. Youβre still not going to sing.
Inwardly, youβre in a constant battle. Going over all your interactions with Joshua and trying to figure out exactly whatβs going on. It seems insane that he could flirt with you when heβs such a menace. Yet, your brain canβt really consider it anything else. Maybe you can write off last night as part of the game. Today, though, seeing more honesty out of him hadnβt been part of a game. And in the kitchen definitely wasnβt part of a game. You can also understand what he meant this morning. The rational part of your brain knows that itβs entirely fair to think he could mess around with you like the rest of your friends do. Itβs even easy to see slipping into that despite not being close yet because he felt so immediately close to everyone else in the friend group. If you cut him some slack with that, then you can even start to see why your friends all like him as much as they do. Heβs easygoing and also mischievous. Just the right combination for the friend group.Β
And, okay, maybe itβs the alcohol talking, but you can also admit that heβs insanely attractive. The sharpness of his jaw contrasts the soft way his hair frames his face. He laughs along with something Seungcheol says and itβs an oddly comforting sound. Makes his whole face light up. You catch yourself glancing over at him entirely too much only to find him looking back at you most times. Thankfully, it doesnβt seem that many of your other friends notice. Really, just Jeonghan, if the look he gives you means anything.Β
Thereβs a thin between hate and love. At least thatβs what you hear. Maybe you never actually hated Joshua and you certainly donβt love him now. But, you have to admit, if only to yourself, that youβre curious about him. More curious than you want to be. And itβs driving you more than a little crazy. The worst part is that he doesnβt even seem affected. Sure, he throws a lot of glances in your direction and teases you along with your friends. But, itβs justβ¦normal behavior. Nothing that suggests that heβs having an internal argument the way you are.Β
Eventually, when itβs into the early hours of the morning again, the group starts to wind down. Soonyoung has long since abandoned his singing career in favor of queueing endless videos on YouTube on the TV. Jun is playfully arguing with Jennie about something nobody else seems to understand. Sana is drifting off where she sits, prompting Mingyu to gently wake her up and help her off to her bedroom. Itβs the perfect chance for you to announce to the room at-large that youβre going to bed. You miss the look that passes between Jeonghan and Joshua at your announcement.Β
You get as far as a quick facial cleanse to remove any makeup before you hear the door to the bedroom open and close. It makes you poke your head through the door, though you know it could only be one person.Β
βYou dipped pretty quickly without actually saying goodnight,β he says and you pull your head back into the bathroom so that you can dry it off.
βAnd thatβs an issue?β you ask when you step out into the bedroom.Β
βAn observation,β he corrects.Β
βIt seemed like the night was winding down, so I figured that I might as well turn in,β you say.
βIs that all?β he asks and takes a few steps towards you.Β
βWhat else would it be?β you ask, drifting a little closer yourself without even realizing.
βI donβt know,β he says, but the look he gives you says otherwise. It feels like he pierces right through you with it.Β
βVenture a guess,β you suggest, narrowing your eyes at him.Β
βYou might have been signalling me to follow you,β he suggests and you hate the way your stomach does a little flip.Β
You hide it behind a scoff and turn your head. βWeβre sharing a room, Joshua. Itβs not like you wouldnβt end up here eventually.βΒ
βHave you thought about what I said in the kitchen?β he asks, changing his approach.
You lick your lips to buy yourself a minute. Donβt miss the way his eyes flick down to watch the movement of your tongue. There are a million different thoughts fighting to the front of your brain. Thereβs only one way to really know, though. You close the space between you and he doesnβt make a move.
βI need to see something,β you say quietly into the space between you.Β
βOkay,β he agrees without even knowing what youβre asking.Β
Thereβs no time to second guess yourself or you might lose your nerve. With your hands on his face, you pull him down to your lips and kiss him. For real, this time. Without an audience or a game or anything else. His body is tense for a second before he winds his own arms around your lower back to pull you against him. Heβs confident and calm, letting you find the answer to whatever question youβre asking. Youβre not even sure who deepens the kiss as your tongue tangles with his. You arch your back, pressing tighter against his chest and he lets his body follow yours. Let your hands slide from his face so your arms are around his neck. His hands slide down to land on your ass. The lightest squeeze makes you moan softly into his mouth.Β
Itβs him that breaks the kiss, pressing his forehead against yours as he catches his breath. Doesnβt move his hands from your body, though. The chemistry with him is electric, like nothing you can remember experiencing before. With a kiss like that, itβs going to be very hard to act like your body doesnβt want him.Β
βHow much have you had to drink tonight?β he asks, still breathing a little harder than normal.Β
Of course heβs concerned about that because he really is just as nice as all of your friends say. βEnough that my guard is down. Not so much that it stops me from knowing what I want.βΒ
βAnd what do you want,β he asks. The low tone of his voice is going to drive you insane, actually.
βYou,β you say simply.
βDonβt toy with me,β he warns you.Β
That makes you pull away so that you can look at him. βIβm not. I donβt have any answers for you, I just know I canβt ignore whatever this is thatβs drawing me to you.βΒ
βThen donβt,β he says and pulls you back into him.Β
The kiss is demanding. The kind of kiss that sets your entire body on fire. Even more consuming than the first kiss where you just wanted to see what would happen. You have no idea what any of this is going to mean and youβre not even sure you care. Itβs a problem for later when your head isnβt clouded with nothing but thoughts of his man that drives you insane. A conversation to have in the light of day, maybe.Β
His hands are everywhere on you and youβre not sure how you havenβt appreciated them more before this moment. They squeeze at your ass in a way that makes you press into him. They run up your sides and make you shudder. Tease across your breasts even though youβre fully clothed. It shouldnβt turn you on so easily. Shouldnβt have you making so many soft moans that he catches. Itβs better than you could have imagined from the way he whispered in your ear the night before. And he hasnβt even moved on to kissing down your body. Not yet, at least.
Without warning, he breaks the kiss again and youβre a little embarrassed at the way you follow his lips. Joshua doesnβt say a word as he disappears into the bathroom and returns with a couple of towels. Rolls them up and presses them against the crack in the door. Thankfully, your room is separate from the others. Still, you donβt want any of your friends hearing whatever is about to happen. At least this should muffle it a bit.Β
βAre you still sure?β he asks when he finishes with the towels.
βYes,β you say.
βBecause if we keep going, I donβt think I can stop. Not now that Iβm getting a taste of you,β he says and you shudder.Β
βI donβt want you to stop,β you say.Β
Any hesitation disappears when you utter that simple sentence. He turns you around so that your back is to his chest and brushes your hair to the side. This time, heβs not just whispering in your ear. He's running his tongue along the shell of it. Kissing behind your ear while his hands grip your hips. You wiggle your ass against him experimentally and appreciate the way he moans into the kiss. He continues on to the pulse point of your neck, sucking in just enough so that it wonβt leave a mark. The way he takes his time is going to be your undoing. When he starts pressing you forward to one of the beds, you donβt even fight him.Β
Before you can collapse onto the bed, he turns you around again and kisses you hard on the lips. Lets himself get lost in you again. Uses one of his hands to hook your leg up around his hip and deepens the kiss even further. You cling to him for balance and trust that he wonβt let anything happen to you. Itβs insane the way everything can change in a moment. The way your entire view of him changes when you stop fighting over nothing. Then he grinds into you and your thoughts go blank. Heβs not even hard yet and you can only imagine what heβs going to feel like when he is. Itβs too much. Enough to make you pull away so that you can start stripping out of your clothing. Joshua watches you for a moment, pupils totally blown, before doing the same.Β
Your breath catches at the sight of him. You already know heβs beautiful, but this is something else. Heβs all lean lines without it being too much muscle. Deceptively in shape for someone that never shows off his body. You would have had no idea, especially with the way your other friends show off their own bodies. It makes you self conscious for a second until you see the look in his eyes. The way he drinks in every inch of you like he canβt believe this is happening. Like heβs the lucky one in this situation. And heβs the one to close the space between you. To reach out and put his hands on your bare skin, resting them on your waist to pull you closer. When he kisses you again, itβs strangely soft, at complete odds with being naked against him. When his kisses trail down your neck, you have to try to stifle a moan. Remind yourself that youβre still in a house full of your friends.Β
Joshua backs you up against one of the beds as he kisses down your body. He stops every time he finds a spot on your body thatβs a little more sensitive. Gives you a little more attention there. You swear it feels like heβs smiling against your skin when he pulls noises out of you. That smile thatβs so familiar to you that you donβt seem to mind so much anymore. Not now when his lips feel so good on you. Gently, he presses you back so that you collapse onto the bed. Youβre about to move back when he catches you. Leans over you to kiss you breathless again. But, heβs pulling away too soon and crouching down so heβs between your legs. It pulls you up short because surely heβs notβ¦
βCan I taste you?β he asks, low and a little desperate. He pushes your knees open gently, experimentally.Β
βYou donβt haveβ¦β you start and he chuckles. Itβs insane that he can pin you in place with a look.
βI know that I donβt have to, but I really fucking want to,β he says.Β
βOkay, but this angleβ¦β you start again, feeling a little too exposed.Β
βIs perfect,β he finishes without hesitation. βYouβre stunning and all I need for you to do is say yes. Let me show you just how well my mouth works.βΒ
βFuck,β you whisper out, losing any remaining nerves or self consciousness. βYes.β
βThank god,β he whispers like a prayer.Β
You expect him to dive right between your legs. Of course he doesnβt, though. He kisses up the inside of one thigh. Lets his breath ghost across your wet core as he moves to kiss down the inside of your other thigh. You cannot let this man get you begging. Not so soon. Not like this. But, you donβt have to. The look he gives you before putting his mouth where you need it the most is sinful. Full of lust and desire and designed to ruin you. Not that he needs to know that. Gently, he places a kiss against your center. Looks up at you from under his lashes and youβre struggling. Thankfully, he doesnβt keep you waiting. He licks a stripe up your center. Must feel how wet heβs already gotten you. It seems to be driving him crazy, too. He licks deep into you, eating your pussy like a man starved. A loud moan escapes you before you clamp a hand over your mouth and knit your other hand in the sheets. Joshua adjusts so that your legs are over his shoulders and he can tilt you back. His tongue hits you at a new angle and you think you might lose it. He pulls back just for a moment to flick his tongue across your clit and suck it into his mouth. The look he gives you says he knows exactly what heβs doing. Knows that heβs going to push you over the edge entirely too soon.Β
Itβs the best you can ever remember feeling with a man between your legs like this. He definitely knows what heβs doing. And youβre in such a haze that you canβt hold back. Canβt stop the praise that falls quietly from your lips. Canβt stop yourself from telling him just how pretty he looks. How much you love the sight of him there. How good his mouth feels. All of it seems to spur him on more. When his mouth returns to your pussy, you really do think youβre going to be done for. You canβt believe that it feels this good without him even using his fingers. But, that coil forms low inΒ your tummy and you know itβs only going to be a minute.Β
And then he does the worst thing imaginable. Pulls his mouth from you just as youβre about to cum. The look you give him is pure betrayal. For a horrible moment, you wonder if this has all been some kind of trap. Until he smirks at you and rises to lean over you again. Joshua puts one large hand behind your head and kisses you hard. Desperate. You can taste yourself on his lips and his tongue. Can feel how turned on he is by the way his dick hits your skin and he groans into your mouth. Itβs kind of satisfying to know that you have him this worked up just from eating you out.Β
βI want you to fuck me,β you whisper against his lips between kisses.Β
He groans. βI donβt think I have a condom.βΒ
You pull back and look at him. βIβm covered and Iβm clean. So as long as you are, tooβ¦βΒ
Itβs kind of cute to watch the way he blinks, clearly trying to make sure he heard you right. βIβm not sureβ¦β
βYou donβt want to?β you ask and he must see something in your expression because he softens.Β
βBelieve me when I say I want you more than fucking anything in the world,β he says. It doesnβt escape you that he says he wants you. Not that he wants to like you said.Β
βItβs okay. If you say that I can trust you, then I will,β you assure him. Heβs so unguarded that it actually makes your heart skip a beat.Β
βYou can trust me,β he says softly.Β
Thereβs entirely too much emotion for you to process behind those four words. So, you pull him back into you to kiss him. Hope he feels what youβre not going to say. Not now. He seems to understand, though, because he kisses you back just as fiercely. Using his free hand, he lines himself up at your entrance. His tip teases your folds and you moan. It would be entirely too loud if Joshua hadnβt caught it in the kiss. Maybe he does know what heβs doing. Heβs definitely the one protecting both of you from being overheard by your friends. Friends that youβre not even sure had gone to their rooms before this all started. You quickly cast that thought from your head.
Joshua presses in and out of you slowly. Takes his time because he doesnβt have a condom (or any lube) to make the slide easier. The pace drives you crazy, though; You hook your legs around his hips and he braces himself with one hand on the bed. The other grips your hip to anchor you. You run your hands all over him as he continues to gently ease into you. Note the way he gasps into your mouth when you tangle a hand in his hair. Smile against his lips at the way he reacts to your nails on his scalp. Think it may be the death of you when you run your nails down his back and his hips stutter. You do it again and he nearly growls. Actually breaks the kiss to look at you.Β
Youβre just about to ask if itβs too much when you register the look on his face. His voice is low, warning. βYouβre going to be the death of me if you keep that up and Iβm not even inside you.β
βThen maybe you should hurry up,β you say back, almost challenging.Β
This is a game you canβt win. Not when he looks like that. Joshua moves his hand from the bed to your hip so heβs only gripping you. You get one look at his face and know youβre fucked before he snaps his hips, bottoming out in you. Lets you moan for a split second before he catches your lips again.Β
βWhat was that?β he asks against your lips.Β
Youβre totally fucked. Absolutely done. The way he fills you feels perfect. Itβs just the right stretch and you know heβs going to hit exactly where you need him to. Your brain goes totally blank. You forget that this is the same man whoβs been a demon. Forget that youβre not going to beg him for anything. It all goes out the window.
βPlease, I need you to move,β you say and try to wriggle against him.Β
He chuckles a little. Presses feather light kisses to each side of your mouth and then along your jaw without moving inside you. Moves one of his hands from your hip to gently brush hair off your face. Then, heβs smiling that confident smile. βWell, since you said pleaseβ¦β
With his hand on the bed next to you again, he starts actually thrusting into you. You tighten your legs around him so theyβre not dangling off the bed. You let your hands roam his body, exploring every inch of him. Try to map what he reacts the most to through the haze of the tension thatβs building up within you again. Joshua alternates between kissing you and whispering praise into your skin. Heβs so free with it. Thereβs nothing cocky about it, either. Not now, at least. His pace is steady, alternating between shallow thrusts and deep ones that make you shudder. He makes a small adjustment to the angle and it takes everything in you not to scream out. You clap one hand over your mouth with the loss of his lips on yours. Your other hand knots in the sheets and you throw your head back. Joshua picks up his pace. Can tell that youβre close. He must be too because he presses a thumb into your clit. Rubs quick circles over it and thatβs too much for you. The coil snaps and youβre coming hard around his dick. He keeps fucking you through it and releases just after you, somehow managing to keep his thrusts relatively even through his own orgasm.Β
He leans over you and kisses you again, messy and needy. You respond even though you canβt catch your breath. Drunk on the thought of him, but feeling entirely sober now despite drinking earlier in the night. Your chest rises and falls in time with his when he pulls back and just gazes at you. Heβs still inside you and youβre sure itβs not comfortable to be arched over you next to the bed. But, he doesnβt seem to care. The gaze is so soft and you have to turn your head, just for a second. Joshua, instead, gently turns you back to him and brushes some of the sweaty hairs away from your forehead. Runs his hand down your body and gently helps you disentangle your legs around him. They feel a little stiff from how tightly you held on. Then, he slowly pulls himself out. Watches where youβre sure a little cum leaks free. It makes you wonder if heβs thinking he wants more like you do. Except, you know that you canβt really risk it again tonight.Β
βLet me go grab a towel,β he says and presses a kiss to your forehead.Β
All you can do is nod and flop back against the bed. Your whole body feels relaxed. Satisfied in a way that you havenβt been in a while. Unconsciously, you trail your fingers over your lips and along the parts of your body where you can still feel his touch. His presence lingers on you like a blanket. Comforting and warm. You donβt even realize youβre smiling.Β
βIf you keep doing that with a smile, Iβm not going to be able to stop myself from diving between your legs again,β he says.
You roll your head to the side to look at him. Push yourself into a sitting position so that you can watch him walk back over to you. He really is one of the most beautiful people youβve ever seen in your life. βI think weβve probably pushed it enough for tonight.β
That makes both of you chuckle. βProbably. Though, I might not care if it meant you kept making those noises.βΒ
Without your permission, your cheeks flush and you look away from him. This time, he lets you have the moment. Instead, he goes to work wiping the sweat clear from your body. Thereβs shouldnβt be that much care in the gesture, but there is. Joshua Hong is good at a lot of things, apparently, including aftercare. You watch fondly as he gently wipes between your legs to make sure nothing dries there.Β
βI know thereβsβ¦a lot to talk about you,β you start as Joshua steps away. He turns back to you, looking a little guarded again for the first time. It hurts your heart. βJoshua, I promise Iβm not saying weβre not going to talk. I just wanted to know if we could get ready for bed and talk in the morning?βΒ
βOh,β he says, relaxing again. Smiles at you in a way that youβre not sure you can handle. It makes you want to tell him to be gentle with you. βYeah, of course. Itβs been a long day.βΒ
βThank you,β you say.
In a second, heβs back over in front of you to help you up. You roll your eyes and swat at him for a second, but do let him help you. You stretch your body out, arms over your head,Β and miss the way Joshua stops to watch you as you roll your neck. Then, you do catch him looking at you and he plays it off by offering you one of his baggy shirts to sleep in. Considering it for half a second, you accept and grab a pair of the boy shorts you like to sleep in. The ones you havenβt worn yet because you werenβt expecting to be sharing with him. The two of you stand together and do your nighttime skincare routines. He stands behind you, wrapping an arm gently around your stomach as he brushes his teeth. It doesnβt feel clingy like it would in another situation. Just very soft, which is going to be an issue for tomorrow-you to handle. Your heart seems to be rushing way ahead of your head.
Joshua disappears for just a moment, after checking the door, to grab waters for both of them. He returns without any issue. Neither of you says anything about it when you both get into the same bed together. It just goes unsaid as you let him pull you against him. Both of you relishing in the comfort of the other as you fall into an easy, dreamless sleep. Nope. definitely not going to be any issues here.Β
It takes a moment for your brain to clear the next morning. Not because you donβt remember the night before. Your brain is just in that hazy half-asleep, half-awake state when you register the arm around you. As youβre waking up, you glance over at Joshuaβs face. Peaceful, again, like you noticed yesterday morning. Completely unguarded while he sleeps.Β
Except, he also looks entirely different to you now. Sometimes things look different in the light of day. Sometimes, a new day dawns and you wonder just why you made a decision. Thatβs not the case for you. Not this time. Your body warms at the thought of him. It doesnβt make you want to pull away like other times, either. Even though you know that the path forward might be complicated at first. Or it might involve a lot of teasing. None of that seems to turn you away from this man that has so many more layers than you realized.Β
As youβre looking over at him without really seeing him (because youβre zoning out in your thoughts), you realize his breathing changes. Heβs awake now, but still looking very groggy. He pulls you into him, letting your legs tangle together, and kisses you gently. You canβt even fight the way you melt into him. The kiss is slow, languid. Not desperate like the night before. In any other situation, you hate kissing first thing in the morning. Youβre not going to stop to think what that means this time.Β
Joshua pulls away and smiles at you. βIf I keep kissing you, Iβm never going to be able to get up and our friends will definitely know somethingβs up.βΒ
βFine,β you sigh.Β
βGuess you donβt hate me anymore,β he teases, running a finger along your arm and watching the goosebumps spring up.Β
βI donβt think I ever hated you,β you say and earn a look from him.
βYou donβt think?β he questions and you break first, smiling.Β
βYou can never be totally sure,β you say.Β
βMaybe weβll have to test it again,β he says to play along.
βGuess so,β you agree easily.Β
βSo,β he starts and moves to sit up. You mirror him and cross your legs. βYou mentioned needing to talkβ¦β
βYeah,β you agree and take a deep breath. βIβm not really sure whatβs happening here or if it was just, like, a one-time thing to get some tension outβ¦β
βIt wasnβt for me,β he says, interrupting you. Takes a steadying breath like he needs to prepare for the next bit. βWas it for you?βΒ
Itβs vulnerable, honest. You canβt ignore that heβs being brave. That heβs putting himself out there without knowing where you stand. This is the thoughtful Joshua youβve heard so much about. The one that makes friends as easily as breathing. Just as he looks away, you gently reach out to take his hand. βNo, it wasnβt for me, either.βΒ
βDonβt do that to me,β he breathes out as the tension disappears from his shoulders.Β
βIβm sorry,β you say with a smile and can tell he forgives you immediately. βThis has caught me a little off-guard.β
βMe too,β he agrees and the considers. βNot in the same way, though, I donβt think.β
βIβm confused,β you admit.Β
He takes a breath like heβs bracing himself again. Youβre not sure for what, though. Youβve already been honest. βI already knew I had a crush on you.β
βOh,β you say softly.
βIβve had a crush on you basically since moving in with Jeonghan and Iβd basically given up before this trip. I didnβt think youβd ever consider me. Now it seems like maybe it wasnβt just one sided,β he says.Β
βMaybe not,β you concede.Β
βI think Jeonghan might have known. He definitely teased me about it even though I never told him. Heβs too observant,β Joshua says with an eye roll.Β
βItβs justβ¦β you start and frown. βI want to figure things out with you and thereβs a lot of questions to answer, so Iβm not sure that Iβm ready toβ¦β
βLet our friends in on it?β he asks with a soft chuckle. You nod, thankful he doesnβt seem mad about that.Β
βYeah,β you agree, unsure of what else to say.Β
βI can agree to that,β he says with a mischievous smile. βWhen weβre out there with our friends, Iβll keep teasing you like I always do.βΒ
βGreat,β you interrupt with an eye roll.Β
βBut, when weβre in here,β he continues, the heat from the night before returning to his gaze, βIβm not going to act like I donβt know what you taste like. Or what you sound like when I fuck you.β
βYou canβt say shit like that,β you squeak out and cover your face.
Joshua gently pulls your hands from your face. He kisses you softly. βSorry, itβs out of my system. For now.βΒ
You swat at him and he quickly jumps off the bed. Maybe itβs not him you need to worry about giving you away. Heβs got the easier job, after all. Normal for Joshua and you, in the eyes of your friends, just means heβs teasing you. Feeding into your distaste for him. But, how do you act annoyed by him after last night?Β
Pretending everything is normal proves to be just as difficult as you expect. Thankfully, it doesnβt seem like anyone heard you the night before. The house is big and several of your friends need to sleep with some kind of background noise on. Plus, everyone had been drinking, even if nobody (other than Soonyoung or possibly Jun) had been drunk. Thatβs at least one hurdle that makes your day easier. Joshua carries on acting like he always has with you and you try to give your normal responses. Try not to let on that anything has shifted between the two of you. Rationally, you know that whatever is forming between the two of you is a good thing. Know that your friends would be happy for you (after teasing you relentlessly). Thatβs not what holds you back. Itβs that you and Joshua need the chance to figure out whatever it is by yourselves. Without having to answer questions from your friends that you canβt answer yet.Β
The schedule during the day is relatively busy. Thereβs a scenic train ride that includes an amazing brunch buffet. Some of the sights through the windows take your breath away. Everything seems quiet, untouched. You and Jennie sit together and just watch the world go by, commenting on the beauty or else catching up on life. Everything about it is relaxing and just what the group needs. Even the train ride itself is smooth, a feat youβre not sure how they accomplish. Itβs easy to see why itβs such a highly rated thing to do in the area. And, since Joshua isnβt sitting right next to you, itβs not so hard to pretend like everything is normal. Well, except for one comment that he makes that causes you to blush a little and earns you a skeptical look from Jennie. Sheβs not as observant as Jeonghan, though, so you think you manage it fine.Β
After the train ride, you all walk around in town to explore the little shops. Soonyoung and Jun take off giggling and chasing each other, for no apparent reason. Just for the vibes, probably. You mostly focus on window shopping unless something catches your eye. Itβs just nice to be out in the fresh air. Thereβs also something about the shops that make you feel like you stepped back in time, a little. Itβs not a bad feeling. It just adds to the sense of calm you feel.Β
One shop draws you in because itβs local, handmade jewelry. Thatβs definitely a favorite for you because it feels unique. Special. Some of the pieces you get from big chains can feel impersonal. The handmade pieces feel like they tell a story. They feel more perfect for any of their imperfects. Sana, Jeonghan, and Joshua follow you into the store, dispersing to look at different pieces.Β
βWhat do you think of these?β a soft voice asks from your side, making you jump a little.Β
βWhy do you keep doing that?β you ask, heart racing, as you turn to Joshua.Β
βItβs fun to see you jump,β he says with a shrug. That glint is back in his eyes.Β
βIβm not sure thatβs your color,β Jeonghan chimes in, nodding at the necklace. Where did he come from?Β
βMaybe itβs not for me,β he says with an easy shrug, looking at the necklace again.Β
βOoooh,β Jeonghan teases. He turns to you. βLucky person, donβt you think?βΒ
You level Jeonghan with a glare, surprising yourself how easy it is, at least for that moment, to pretend. βIβm not sure about lucky since itβs Joshua. He does have good taste, though.βΒ
βThatβs probably as close to a compliment as youβll get from her,β Jeonghan says and elbows his roommate.Β
βNobody can resist me forever,β he says and throws you a wink that has Jeonghan laughing as they head in another direction.
Once again, you really want to ask him to be gentle with you. How are you meant to act like everything is fine? How come heβs trying to make this even harder on you? Then, you remember him asking your opinion on the necklace and realize heβs struggling, too. It makes you feel lighter knowing that he wants to buy you something from this store that drew you in all while you havenβt even figured out whatβs happening. He did say that you could trust him. And you want to. A scary thought, to be sure.
The next stop on the agenda is a late afternoon murder mystery show. Thereβs audience participation and itβs something several of your friends have been talking about all weekend. The audience participation part may not be the most appealing to you, but it does sound interesting. At least, until Joshua makes sure to sit right next to you during the show. And lets the actors comment on what a cute couple you make without correcting them. He actively encourages them, instead, and it makes your friends howl with laughter. Itβs painfully on brand for how he interacts with you, but it makes your brain short circuit a bit. Makes you stumble over a response before you gather your composure again. Itβs par for the course for Joshua, but definitely not for you. You carefully avoid the questioning look from Jeonghan. You donβt trust yourself in the moment. If anyone could read you and figure it all out, itβs definitely Jeonghan. When things settle down, you do glare over at Joshua, though.
By the time you make it back to the house, having decided to get a bunch of take out and make your own feast, youβre just happy the day is over. Spending time with your friends is great. Pretending you didnβt fuck Joshua the night before, not so much. Despite agreeing not to tell your friends yet, heβs making it as hard as possible. Each time he needles you a little, itβs like heβs trying to figure out more about you. Trying to figure out your reactions to file them away for some later use. At this rate, Jeonghan, as your best friend and Joshuaβs roommate, is going to figure it out. Especially if heβs already figured out Joshua had a crush. Yet, Joshua doesnβt seem concerned. Well, two can play at that game.Β
Mingyu and Jun head into the kitchen to set up the spread of food, even though thereβs no cooking involved. You, along with several other friends, excuse yourself to change into more comfortable clothes to hang out in. When you return in yoga pants and a slightly cropped sweatshirt, you revel in the way Joshua does a double take. Feel immense satisfaction at the way he drinks you in before looking away. He disappears, probably to change and buy himself a minute, and you smile to yourself. By the time he returns, you already have a plate and he doesnβt take the open seat next to you. His eyes bore into you, though, and you know that he knows itβs your way to push back at him a little.Β
After you all finish eating, you notice Joshua in the kitchen and get up under the pretense of needing something to drink. He hears you coming and looks around to see that all the rest of your friends are still in the living room area and talking.
βWhat happened to pretending nothing happened?β he asks softly.Β
βI could ask you the same.βΒ
βIβm only teasing you like normal.β
βAnd Iβm only putting on comfortable clothing, same as anyone else.βΒ
The look he gives you says he doesnβt believe a word of that. βYouβre gonna give me a semi in that outfit with the way you keep moving around. God, I sound so pathetic.β
βNo, you donβt,β you say, but your eyes sparkle. βGuess I shouldnβt say that Iβm not wearing a bra or any underwear.β
βYouβ¦what?β Joshua gapes at you.
Instead of answering, you just grab your drink and head back to join your friends. You donβt have to turn around to know that his eyes are on you. The point definitely goes to you for this round. And maybe it sends at least a little message because Joshua tones it down a little the rest of the night.Β
Compared to the other nights, this one is pretty tame. You all know that you have to head back home the next day, even if you donβt have to get an early start. Some people have a drink or two, but itβs just casual. You agree on something to watch and all settle in. Soonyoung struggles with sitting still for that long, and Mingyu pouts that nobody will cuddle with him in the oversized chair. He canβt understand why you donβt give in when he can convince you any other time. But, otherwise itβs just nice. Easy. The perfect kind of ending to a wonderful weekend away with friends.Β
Slowly, people start excusing themselves to go to their rooms and nerves hit you again. Youβre going to be alone with Joshua and youβre not really sure what to expect. Donβt even want to make eye contact with him because you donβt trust yourself to keep it together. So, you just stretch your arms out and say goodnight to the room. Figure you can leave it to Joshua to decide when he follows you to the room.Β
It takes longer than you expect. Longer than it did the night before, by far. You turn some music on, just loud enough that it may cover anything that happens. But, itβs at least twenty minutes before the door opens. Long enough that you consider just going to sleep. Long enough to think that maybe the moment in the kitchen had been a step too far.Β
You rise off your bed when he closes the door behind him and take a few steps over to him, preparing to say something. He doesnβt give you the chance. He closes the space between you and catches your lips in the most bruising kiss yet. Groans when you gasp into his mouth. He backs you into the wall and presses himself hard against you. Thereβs no space for you to move. He presses your legs apart so that he can slide one of his own legs between them. One hand rests behind your head, cradling it so you donβt hit the wall. The other hand runs up your side and under your sweatshirt. Rough and a little possessive. A very different side to him and itβs turning you on more than it should be.Β
Joshua pulls away from you just enough so he can run his hand across your breast, confirming what you said about not having a bra on. He groans again, jerks his hips against yours almost involuntarily. He breaks the kiss and you gasp for air.
βI canβt believe you really came out without a bra just to tease me,β he whines out. A little desperation slipping into his voice.Β
βI canβt believe you waited so long to come to our room that I considering going to sleep,β you retort, a little bratty now that you realize heβs not mad.
βI couldnβt come right away because it would have been obvious,β he explains. βThen, I started to think about you not wearing a bra or underwear. And the way I would have you clenching that pretty pussy around my dick again and it took a second to calm down.βΒ
βWho says Iβm gonna let you fuck me again?β you challenge.Β
βDonβt play with me,β he whines, some of the confidence disappearing.Β
βI wonβt,β you say, suddenly serious.Β
You kiss him again to say the things youβre not sure how to. He gets the message, though. Your lips chase his when he pulls away entirely too quickly. But, he ducks his head and pushes your sweatshirt up without taking it off completely. Runs his tongue over your nipple and drags it between his teeth. It makes you arch into his mouth. Itβs kind of hot, actually, the way he canβt wait to have his mouth on you. He switches to your other breast and is sure to give your body all of his attention. In response, you drag your core along his thigh thatβs between your leg. Searching for any kind of friction.Β
In any other situation, you might be embarrassed by how quickly your body reacts. Joshua erases that, though. Youβre not even sure how. Despite all the time youβve both spent terrorizing the other, itβs insanely easy to trust him. Easy to feel confident when he reacts to you just as strongly. Easy to just let things happen when heβs so willing to be desperate for you. No games, no bullshit, just making sure youβre both feeling good.Β
The friction just isnβt enough anymore and you need more. Donβt want to keep riding his thigh while he laves over your breasts. You pull his face up to kiss him again and let your sweatshirt fall. His pupils are blown and somehow the confused look he gives you is cute. Youβre not sure how he does it. A thought for another time, anyway. You pull him over to that reading nook you were so excited about and havenβt used. Push your yoga pants down your legs and kick them aside. Bend over and look over your shoulder at him. The lust is clear on his face.
βI just need you inside me,β you say and watch his eyes get wider with surprise. βPlease.β
βGod, I love hearing that from you,β he admits. βThink Iβd agree to anything if you asked me like that.βΒ
βSimp,β you tease.
βAbsolutely,β he agrees without any teasing.Β
You donβt have a chance to react to the honesty in the statement before heβs pushing his own sweatpants down and kicking them aside. Casts his shirt aside even though he doesnβt need to. He presses your lower back so youβre bent at the right angle and you arch your back. Impatiently, he pushes your legs a little farther apart. The next second, heβs gathering your wetness and pressing a single finger into your pussy. Trying to at least prepare you a little. In no time at all, he inserts a second finger and pumps quickly into you. You reach for one of the pillows to bury your face into it so that you can moan little more freely. Joshua bends over your back and presses kisses into your skin.Β
βPlease,β you say again, pulling your face from the pillow. βI donβt wanna cum on your fingers.β
βFuck,β he mutters and pulls his fingers out.Β
Itβs a moment before you feel him again. You bury your head back into the pillow when he presses his head against your entrance. You wiggle and encourage him to press harder. Any self control he might have disappears and he snaps hard. Soon, the sounds of skin on skin mingles with the music and your muffled moans. Joshua moves your leg so one knee is on the bench and he can get a better angle to fuck you. His hands wander your body. Digging into your hips hard enough that you imagine youβll have fingerprints there. Flicking a thumb across your nipple. Finally working down to your clit and rubbing in time with his thrusts.
Entirely too quickly, your body shudders as the orgasm rips through you right as Joshua finds his own release. Your legs feel like jelly and youβre not sure if you can keep standing, even as youβre trying to come down. But Joshua, surprising you again, carefully pulls out and drags you over to one of the beds with him. You collapse, sliding further up to make room for him and pulling the sweatshirt off, finally. Except he doesnβt settle next to you. No, he settles between your legs, pressing them open.Β
βJoshua, whatβ¦β you start to ask, breathless still.Β
What becomes obvious immediately. He licks into your cunt, gathering your cum that mixes with his own. If you thought he was a man starved the night before, itβs nothing compared to tonight. Heβs not taking his time with you, either. Not giving you a chance to recover. Youβre so sensitive, but the way his tongue laps at you feels amazing. You knot a hand in his hair and he groans, sending a vibration through your pussy. This time, when he moves his mouth to your clit, he slides a finger inside you. Quickly adds another. You canβt believe the way your body responds to him. Canβt believe how good it feels even though youβre so incredibly sensitive. You bite down on your own fist to stop yourself from screaming out the way you want to. The end of this trip canβt come soon enough. You absolutely cannot wait to have him in your own space where you donβt have to worry about friends overhearing.Β
The second orgasm hits you so hard it whites out your vision. Has you coating Joshuaβs fingers and mouth. He guides you through your high as all the tension leaves your body. You feel like youβre nothing more than a puddle on the bed when you feel him settle next to you. After giving you a minute to catch your breath, he pushes himself up to hover over you. Gives you what should be a gentle kiss until you wrap your arms around him and pull him down on top of you. Even though he offsets some of his weight, thereβs still a pleasant heaviness having him on top of you. Itβs so comfortable that you could kiss him for hours without getting sick of it..Β
After a long moment, he pulls back to look at you. That tender look back on his face. βI hope that was okay.β
βYou know Iβm not complaining,β you say earnestly.
βI was wondering if I could make you squirt,β he teases and heβs all confidence again. You swat at his arm and pretend youβre going to wriggle away.
βI take it back,β you joke.
βNo, you donβt,β he says, confident without being cocky.
And then heβs kissing you again. Youβre back to tangling yourself up with him. Just letting things happen without overthinking anything. Thereβs something wonderful about this side of Joshua that just makes your mind go blank. Not even in a fucked stupid kind of way. Itβs more like it just feels right. You feel safe and cared for in those moments. You also both feel a little insatiable. Simultaneously wanting to kiss for hours and unable to stop yourself from it turning heavier.Β
Joshua pulls back from the kiss and flops dramatically onto the bed next to you. You roll over and pro yourself up on an elbow to look at him. His eyes find yours, affectionate and also very clearly turned on. βIf you donβt stop this, Iβm going to want to be inside you again.βΒ
βMe?β you ask, pretending to be shocked.Β
βYes, you,β he says and leans forward to kiss your nose.Β
βI donβt know what you mean,β you say and flutter your eyelashes.
βI bet you donβt,β he says quietly, unable to stop the light laugh. Then, takes a breath and sits up. Swings his legs out of the bed and reaches back to you. βCome on. Letβs clean up and go to sleep. Weβre heading home tomorrow and itβll be a lot easier to figure this out without so many nosy friends.β
You pout but accept his help, anyway. Heβs right. Even if you canβt really get enough of him, youβre already going to be a little sore from this and you have an endless amount of time to figure things out. As you fall asleep that night, tangled up in him, you feel confident. This isnβt something confined to the little bubble of a vacation. Heβll tell you exactly how he feels and what he wants once youβre back home. Help you be brave enough to be just as honest. Itβs definitely going to be enough.
The next morning is a flurry of activity. Everyone seems to have left packing for the morning, even though there shouldnβt be much to do since itβs only been a few days. People mumble greetings to each other around bites of breakfast as you all clean up. Somehow, things seem to have spread out much more than expected and you want to make sure everything is in good shape before leaving. Not that you let it get genuinely messy. Itβs just that thereβs 10 of you and you donβt want any sort of extra cleaning fee slapped onto Mingyuβs credit card. Youβre still thankful he volunteered to take the charge (though, obviously, you all split the cost).Β
It also becomes clear that even though the check out time isnβt early, you should have set an alarm. Add in the fact that youβre very much sore thanks to Joshua, and itβs an interesting morning. Neither of you is trying to keep up any sort of facade around the other because the focus is making sure youβre ready to leave. It keeps you from even worrying if anyone notices something different. Then again, if things go the way you expect, all your friends will find out that something is going on soon enough. Itβs just a matter of timing. A thought that puts you in an incredibly good mood. You donβt even notice that youβre humming while cleaning until Soonyoung starts singing along to the tune.Β
Worrying about anyone finding out becomes a moot point when youβre all getting ready to leave. At least, in part. Really, you should know better than to try to get anything by Jeonghan. After years of friendship, he easily knows you at least as well as you know yourself, probably better. And he knows something is up. Youβre not sure if he knows the specifics. Donβt really want to think about if he somehow heard you and Joshua the night before.Β
Jennie seems to know something is up, too. Youβre not sure whether she figured it out or if Jeonghan told her. Probably the latter, if youβre honest. Sheβs generally a little easier to fool that Jeonghan. As heβs prone to telling you, you canβt bullshit a bullshitter, and nobody does bullshit better than him. He loves sniffing out a scheme almost as much as he loves coming up withit himself. It confirms your suspicions when you see him and Jennie whispering together then looking over at you. He doesnβt leave you waiting for his response either.
βJennieβs coming back with me,β Jeonghan announces. βShe offered to drive my car, and how can I say no?βΒ
βAnd Iβm supposed to head home alone?β you ask skeptically.Β
βOf course not!β Jeonghan says, pretending to be offended.Β
βWe just thought you and Joshua could use the drive to work out whatever your issues are,β she chimes in, sharing a look.Β
βItβs like you donβt want them to make it back in one piece,β Mingyu jokes, but doesnβt otherwise comment. You canβt tell if he knows anything.
βEven Iβm not going to leave you stranded in your time of need,β Joshua says, immediately falling into the plan. You canβt read the look on his face and you wonder if he already knew, too. Probably, knowing Jeonghan. Heβs a demon, but heβs not cruel. Heβs not going to put you in a situation you genuinely donβt want to be in without checking.Β
The rest of your friends laugh and continue to load up the car. You just shake your head at your best friend as he approaches you. He turns over his shoulder to call to Jennie. βIβll be there in a sec!β
βWhat are you up to?β you ask in nearly a whisper.
βThe better question, bestie, is what youβre up to,β he says, eyes sparkling. You open your mouth to protest and he holds up his hand. βYouβre not as slick as you think you are. Did you forget weβve been friends for a decade?β
βNo, youβd never let me forget,β you joke and Jeonghan rolls his eyes.Β
βI told him that I didnβt expect him back tonight. But, please know, if Iβm right, then I will be teasing you both without mercy,β he says and itβs your turn to laugh.
βThereβs my best friend,β you say with a smile still in your eyes.Β
Heβs serious for a moment. This is the side of Jeonghan that he reserves for only those closest to him. You wait patiently because you know whatever he has to say is important. βYou seem happier than Iβve seen you in a long time. Donβt be afraid of that. You deserve it.β
βThanks, Hannie,β you say softly.Β
βEven if you did totally ignore the point of a single friends Valentineβs getaway,β he says, returning to his normal self as Joshua approaches.Β
βGoodbye,β you say and push him away.Β
His eyes fall on Joshua. βTake good care of her. Youβre a great friend already, but sheβs family.βΒ
βI will,β Joshua promises and plucks the car keys out of your hand.Β
βHey!β you protest and hear Jeonghan laughing as he walks away. βThatβs my car.β
βAnd Iβm an excellent driver,β he says before dropping his voice lower. βCome on and be my passenger princess.β
He really is going to have to stop making your brain short circuit like that. Itβs diabolical. But, then again, thatβs exactly who he is. Not like you expect him to change now. With one last look at the beautiful house, you get into the passenger door that Joshua holds open for you. Youβre very thankful that you gave the weekend a chance. Even more thankful that you gave the man next to you in the driverβs seat a chance. He reaches a hand over to squeeze your thigh and you know itβs going to work out just fine.Β
if you made it through that insanity, thank you and tell me what you thought π
a/n: I have too much fun writing big strong men into pathetic bottoms. my requests are now open so go ahead and ask for a fic!
tags: @hanniebanggi , @sexygrass, @dunixxd join my tag list to get notified about new chapters - here
Cash never smelled so good.
What you laid your eyes on, after fishing Cheol's wallet out of his suit jacket, came as a surprise even to such seasoned scam veteran like you. 50k bills neatly rolled into a bundle, secured with elastic band, reminded you of old mafia movies. You were not sure why this man had, literally millions of Won on him but you were not one to complain. Chaebols were indeed built different. You could only be grateful to this real life Motherlode opportunity. In the same time it was more convenient to take his nice, clean, sparkly cash than cards. Purring knowingly at the sight of his black credit card but keeping it in its place.
Loot +1!
Smirking as you look back at the mess of a man, showing the treasure into your tiny purse. It barely fits. Absolute unit of a man who would usually strike fear to his enemies was laying peacefully in bed. So big but so spent. Dishevelled hair, blanket revealing most except his lower body. His dried up release from yesterday marking perfectly toned muscles. Strands of hair sticking to his forehead.
"You won't mind if I take this, will you?" asking with utmost politeness as you gently take his golden cross necklace off of him and dangle it around your neck.
"All that just for me? Oh, you shouldn't have~" pressing soft peck on his cute nose. The handsome man smiles from his dream and hums in agreement.
Loot +2!
"This will go together nicely." you chuckle, unclasping another treat. Obviously expensive bracelet on his wrist.
You didn't know much about modern jewellery, mostly being antiques and vintage aficionado, but you did know your gold and by the look and weight of this piece, it will earn you nice sum at your favourite pawn shop.
Loot +3!
The night was nearing it's end, muted red light slowly painting the sky, you were pleased by the outcome. Seungcheol was quite a treat, his fucked out puppy eyes filled with tears will most likely occupy your mind for the upcoming week. Unfortunately this would be the first and only time you see each other. Made it a rule for yourself to never go for the same man twice. It was just easier that way. And safer.
You smirk as you write a little goodbye note, leaving it next to his, deeply, breathing body.
"Hmm, something is missing.." you look around the messy hotel room to see bunch of fresh towels piled up on a cabinet.
"Perfect" you smirk as you arrange them into a heart around the note.
It will be better to get going and deposit your newfound fortune into your checking account. Before the princess wakes up.
Well, but this much cash.. will have to be split into smaller bits. After the banks passed new rule about the amount of money you can deposit without having to name source of income.. your head has been aching more than usual. Why make life harder than it already is?
"Sleep tight, pretty boy. Dream of me." You sigh as you fix Cheol's hair behind his ear and close the door behind you.
"Hmm, is it morning already? You really did a number on me, princess." eyes still closed shut, he rolls over to the other side of bed, in search of your warmth, only to be met with a bunch of cold pillows, put together like a barricade. Plus something resembling a towel arrangement?
"..the hell?" he takes one pillow after another, throwing them to far away corner of the room, digging thru your towel heart he is smoothing down the sheets with palm of his hand, when something rustles.
"You need to stop spoiling me so much, pretty boy." he read out loud, your note was accompanied by tiny little heart.
"So you seduce me, have your way with me and disappear next day? Not even kiss goodbye? Not even a breakfast? After all you did to me? Use me like if I am some kind of common SLUT?!" voice thunders between four white walls.
Furrowing eyebrows meet in the middle of forehead. Shaky fist crumples the poor piece of paper, letting it fly straight to the bin.
"Me, Choi Seungcheol, man worth billions, the face of Forbes 30 under 30(!!), won't be treated like that! No, no. Don't think so, Darling!" swearing with that same clenched fist asking any god who was watching for help.
Fully awake in matter of seconds, Seungcheol springs out of bed ready to get justice only for his legs to wobble, adventures of yesterday taking their toll, tumbling down to his knees. For the second time in span of 12 hours.
Pride -10! Ego -20!
--
We already established the fact that Seungcheol was an adventurous guy.
Emphasis on was.
However, he felt rather meek in dark depths of night, spread out in all his glory on hotel bed with your malleable tongue working him open.
"H-hey! Where do you think you are going???" he almost cried out
"Exactly where you need me to be" you rub your thumb over his pulsing, pretty, pink hole.
"Fuckfuckfuck. I don't think that's righ-" he has no time to finish as you forcefully pull him up by the hips, flush against your mouth.
"Oh? But I think this is so right, pretty boy. Be good for me?" Hot, slippery tongue lapping circles in his prohibited zone. You can feel him vibrating under your touch. You can hear his breathing getting louder. You can see his legs slowly opening on their own.
"Let me hear you, big boy" as you slam his hips on your waiting tongue. And then again. "Beg for me."
"p-please" Seungcheol couldn't think, Seungcheol couldn't breathe. Only thing he could do was to speed up his thrusts and meet your insatiable mouth halfway. It was a reflex really. It was a reflex for him to chase after the source of his pleasure as it was a reflex for you to whine into him. Body's natural reaction was making you drip on the crips white bedsheet under you.
"P-please d-don't stop" mouth agape as you slid one finger into his slacken hole. Other hand gripping his thigh harder. Nails digging into flesh.
"fuckfuckfuck, I will be good, I will be so soo good for you.. j-just don't stop." Oh no. You did not plan on stopping anytime soon. Hearing his pathetic pleas had your pussy squeezing around nothing.
"Turn around for me and I will give you whatever you need."
Seungcheol felt a bit dizzy from all the action but followed your instructions nevertheless. Falling apart in front of you.
"Such a good, good boy. Looking so handsome all open for me like this." eyes dark with lust, you bend over to meet his quivering lips, licking into his mouth.
"mmmf.. yes" shutting his eyes in bliss he gave you full access as you added a second finger. Curling them up, diving deeper inside of him. Searching for that special spot... Finding it and immediately hitting it vigorously.
"mmmf, I.. your good boy..yes" big hands shot straight to your hips, getting a handful in attempt to ground himself. Those rough hands were squeezing your flesh, thumbs were massaging circles into your skin as you danced with his tongue. Gently sucking on his plump bottom lip. Each moaning to the other's mouth..
The two fingers inside of him were pistoning without mercy. With each slap on his balls you could feel him squeezing you harder, swallowing you deeper. It was so obvious he was close.
"Such a little slut, aren't you, Cheollie?" grazing his ear with edge of your mouth. "Letting a woman you just met fuck your pretty ass.. That's not what good boys do." halting your movements altogether.
There it was. That nickname again. Such a little thing made his erection throb against your stomach. "P-please, I will do whatever, fuck, need you so bad."
"That bad, huh?"
"So so bad, touch me pleasepleaseplease, don't stop..I will do whatever you want!"
"Whatever I want?" you finally fit third finger into his completely messed up, stretched out hole.
"god yes"
"What is you credit card PIN?" sliding fingers almost all the way out jut to ram them right back in. Taking his breath away.
"8895" rumbles on without hesitation. Few sharp inhales, wiggling himself even deeper on your digits.
"Well done," you purr "now cum for me, pretty boy." Not much else had to be said or done. Seungcheol pulled you down by the back of your neck, locking your mouth in desperate kiss.
"thankyouthankyouthank you." Holding you right there, flush on his chest, while thumb of his other hand rubbed tight circles on your dripping heat - eager to please. Bucking his hips ungently into the palm of your hand.
He was such a good boy for you. So polite. Took all what you gave him. His shiny boba eyes, the moaning into your mouth, how he held you in place while eating your mouth alive, his thumb touching you exactly where you needed him, your fingers way too deep inside working on his high... It was all too much for little Lando Norris..
Just as he came undone, painting his bare torso white, you reached climax sobbing into his lips.
Nirvana +1!
--
Sitting on his knees in silent lonely hotel room Seungcheol noticed quite an empty space around his wrist and neck. Black leather wallet laid open on coffee table, visibly thinner than yesterday. Only his credit card was left. Ramming thru the rest of his belongings, he picked up the phone and dialled a number.
"It's me. Need you to find somebody." he bend down, fishing your little hand written note from the trash.
"You forgot to take my card, Darling" smirk on lips, he smooths out the paper and raises it to his eye level. Pressing small kiss on that tiny heart.
a/n: I have too much fun writing big strong men into pathetic bottoms. my requests are now open so go ahead and ask for a fic!
tags: @hanniebanggi , @sexygrass, @dunixxd join my tag list to get notified about new chapters - here
Cash never smelled so good.
What you laid your eyes on, after fishing Cheol's wallet out of his suit jacket, came as a surprise even to such seasoned scam veteran like you. 50k bills neatly rolled into a bundle, secured with elastic band, reminded you of old mafia movies. You were not sure why this man had, literally millions of Won on him but you were not one to complain. Chaebols were indeed built different. You could only be grateful to this real life Motherlode opportunity. In the same time it was more convenient to take his nice, clean, sparkly cash than cards. Purring knowingly at the sight of his black credit card but keeping it in its place.
Loot +1!
Smirking as you look back at the mess of a man, showing the treasure into your tiny purse. It barely fits. Absolute unit of a man who would usually strike fear to his enemies was laying peacefully in bed. So big but so spent. Dishevelled hair, blanket revealing most except his lower body. His dried up release from yesterday marking perfectly toned muscles. Strands of hair sticking to his forehead.
"You won't mind if I take this, will you?" asking with utmost politeness as you gently take his golden cross necklace off of him and dangle it around your neck.
"All that just for me? Oh, you shouldn't have~" pressing soft peck on his cute nose. The handsome man smiles from his dream and hums in agreement.
Loot +2!
"This will go together nicely." you chuckle, unclasping another treat. Obviously expensive bracelet on his wrist.
You didn't know much about modern jewellery, mostly being antiques and vintage aficionado, but you did know your gold and by the look and weight of this piece, it will earn you nice sum at your favourite pawn shop.
Loot +3!
The night was nearing it's end, muted red light slowly painting the sky, you were pleased by the outcome. Seungcheol was quite a treat, his fucked out puppy eyes filled with tears will most likely occupy your mind for the upcoming week. Unfortunately this would be the first and only time you see each other. Made it a rule for yourself to never go for the same man twice. It was just easier that way. And safer.
You smirk as you write a little goodbye note, leaving it next to his, deeply, breathing body.
"Hmm, something is missing.." you look around the messy hotel room to see bunch of fresh towels piled up on a cabinet.
"Perfect" you smirk as you arrange them into a heart around the note.
It will be better to get going and deposit your newfound fortune into your checking account. Before the princess wakes up.
Well, but this much cash.. will have to be split into smaller bits. After the banks passed new rule about the amount of money you can deposit without having to name source of income.. your head has been aching more than usual. Why make life harder than it already is?
"Sleep tight, pretty boy. Dream of me." You sigh as you fix Cheol's hair behind his ear and close the door behind you.
"Hmm, is it morning already? You really did a number on me, princess." eyes still closed shut, he rolls over to the other side of bed, in search of your warmth, only to be met with a bunch of cold pillows, put together like a barricade. Plus something resembling a towel arrangement?
"..the hell?" he takes one pillow after another, throwing them to far away corner of the room, digging thru your towel heart he is smoothing down the sheets with palm of his hand, when something rustles.
"You need to stop spoiling me so much, pretty boy." he read out loud, your note was accompanied by tiny little heart.
"So you seduce me, have your way with me and disappear next day? Not even kiss goodbye? Not even a breakfast? After all you did to me? Use me like if I am some kind of common SLUT?!" voice thunders between four white walls.
Furrowing eyebrows meet in the middle of forehead. Shaky fist crumples the poor piece of paper, letting it fly straight to the bin.
"Me, Choi Seungcheol, man worth billions, the face of Forbes 30 under 30(!!), won't be treated like that! No, no. Don't think so, Darling!" swearing with that same clenched fist asking any god who was watching for help.
Fully awake in matter of seconds, Seungcheol springs out of bed ready to get justice only for his legs to wobble, adventures of yesterday taking their toll, tumbling down to his knees. For the second time in span of 12 hours.
Pride -10! Ego -20!
--
We already established the fact that Seungcheol was an adventurous guy.
Emphasis on was.
However, he felt rather meek in dark depths of night, spread out in all his glory on hotel bed with your malleable tongue working him open.
"H-hey! Where do you think you are going???" he almost cried out
"Exactly where you need me to be" you rub your thumb over his pulsing, pretty, pink hole.
"Fuckfuckfuck. I don't think that's righ-" he has no time to finish as you forcefully pull him up by the hips, flush against your mouth.
"Oh? But I think this is so right, pretty boy. Be good for me?" Hot, slippery tongue lapping circles in his prohibited zone. You can feel him vibrating under your touch. You can hear his breathing getting louder. You can see his legs slowly opening on their own.
"Let me hear you, big boy" as you slam his hips on your waiting tongue. And then again. "Beg for me."
"p-please" Seungcheol couldn't think, Seungcheol couldn't breathe. Only thing he could do was to speed up his thrusts and meet your insatiable mouth halfway. It was a reflex really. It was a reflex for him to chase after the source of his pleasure as it was a reflex for you to whine into him. Body's natural reaction was making you drip on the crips white bedsheet under you.
"P-please d-don't stop" mouth agape as you slid one finger into his slacken hole. Other hand gripping his thigh harder. Nails digging into flesh.
"fuckfuckfuck, I will be good, I will be so soo good for you.. j-just don't stop." Oh no. You did not plan on stopping anytime soon. Hearing his pathetic pleas had your pussy squeezing around nothing.
"Turn around for me and I will give you whatever you need."
Seungcheol felt a bit dizzy from all the action but followed your instructions nevertheless. Falling apart in front of you.
"Such a good, good boy. Looking so handsome all open for me like this." eyes dark with lust, you bend over to meet his quivering lips, licking into his mouth.
"mmmf.. yes" shutting his eyes in bliss he gave you full access as you added a second finger. Curling them up, diving deeper inside of him. Searching for that special spot... Finding it and immediately hitting it vigorously.
"mmmf, I.. your good boy..yes" big hands shot straight to your hips, getting a handful in attempt to ground himself. Those rough hands were squeezing your flesh, thumbs were massaging circles into your skin as you danced with his tongue. Gently sucking on his plump bottom lip. Each moaning to the other's mouth..
The two fingers inside of him were pistoning without mercy. With each slap on his balls you could feel him squeezing you harder, swallowing you deeper. It was so obvious he was close.
"Such a little slut, aren't you, Cheollie?" grazing his ear with edge of your mouth. "Letting a woman you just met fuck your pretty ass.. That's not what good boys do." halting your movements altogether.
There it was. That nickname again. Such a little thing made his erection throb against your stomach. "P-please, I will do whatever, fuck, need you so bad."
"That bad, huh?"
"So so bad, touch me pleasepleaseplease, don't stop..I will do whatever you want!"
"Whatever I want?" you finally fit third finger into his completely messed up, stretched out hole.
"god yes"
"What is you credit card PIN?" sliding fingers almost all the way out jut to ram them right back in. Taking his breath away.
"8895" rumbles on without hesitation. Few sharp inhales, wiggling himself even deeper on your digits.
"Well done," you purr "now cum for me, pretty boy." Not much else had to be said or done. Seungcheol pulled you down by the back of your neck, locking your mouth in desperate kiss.
"thankyouthankyouthank you." Holding you right there, flush on his chest, while thumb of his other hand rubbed tight circles on your dripping heat - eager to please. Bucking his hips ungently into the palm of your hand.
He was such a good boy for you. So polite. Took all what you gave him. His shiny boba eyes, the moaning into your mouth, how he held you in place while eating your mouth alive, his thumb touching you exactly where you needed him, your fingers way too deep inside working on his high... It was all too much for little Lando Norris..
Just as he came undone, painting his bare torso white, you reached climax sobbing into his lips.
Nirvana +1!
--
Sitting on his knees in silent lonely hotel room Seungcheol noticed quite an empty space around his wrist and neck. Black leather wallet laid open on coffee table, visibly thinner than yesterday. Only his credit card was left. Ramming thru the rest of his belongings, he picked up the phone and dialled a number.
"It's me. Need you to find somebody." he bend down, fishing your little hand written note from the trash.
"You forgot to take my card, Darling" smirk on lips, he smooths out the paper and raises it to his eye level. Pressing small kiss on that tiny heart.
a/n: I have too much fun writing big strong men into pathetic bottoms
tags: @hanniebanggi , @sexygrass, @dunixxd join my tag list to get notified about new chapters - here
Cash never smelled so good.
What you laid your eyes on, after fishing Cheol's wallet out of his suit jacket, came as a surprise even to such seasoned scam veteran like you. 50k bills neatly rolled into a bundle, secured with elastic band, reminded you of old mafia movies. You were not sure why this man had, literally millions of Won on him but you were not one to complain. Chaebols were indeed built different. You could only be grateful to this real life Motherlode opportunity. In the same time it was more convenient to take his nice, clean, sparkly cash than cards. Purring knowingly at the sight of his black credit card but keeping it in its place.
Loot +1!
Smirking as you look back at the mess of a man, showing the treasure into your tiny purse. It barely fits. Absolute unit of a man who would usually strike fear to his enemies was laying peacefully in bed. So big but so spent. Dishevelled hair, blanket revealing most except his lower body. His dried up release from yesterday marking perfectly toned muscles. Strands of hair sticking to his forehead.
"You won't mind if I take this, will you?" asking with utmost politeness as you gently take his golden cross necklace off of him and dangle it around your neck.
"All that just for me? Oh, you shouldn't have~" pressing soft peck on his cute nose. The handsome man smiles from his dream and hums in agreement.
Loot +2!
"This will go together nicely." you chuckle, unclasping another treat. Obviously expensive bracelet on his wrist.
You didn't know much about modern jewellery, mostly being antiques and vintage aficionado, but you did know your gold and by the look and weight of this piece, it will earn you nice sum at your favourite pawn shop.
Loot +3!
The night was nearing it's end, muted red light slowly painting the sky, you were pleased by the outcome. Seungcheol was quite a treat, his fucked out puppy eyes filled with tears will most likely occupy your mind for the upcoming week. Unfortunately this would be the first and only time you see each other. Made it a rule for yourself to never go for the same man twice. It was just easier that way. And safer.
You smirk as you write a little goodbye note, leaving it next to his, deeply, breathing body.
"Hmm, something is missing.." you look around the messy hotel room to see bunch of fresh towels piled up on a cabinet.
"Perfect" you smirk as you arrange them into a heart around the note.
It will be better to get going and deposit your newfound fortune into your checking account. Before the princess wakes up.
Well, but this much cash.. will have to be split into smaller bits. After the banks passed new rule about the amount of money you can deposit without having to name source of income.. your head has been aching more than usual. Why make life harder than it already is?
"Sleep tight, pretty boy. Dream of me." You sigh as you fix Cheol's hair behind his ear and close the door behind you.
"Hmm, is it morning already? You really did a number on me, princess." eyes still closed shut, he rolls over to the other side of bed, in search of your warmth, only to be met with a bunch of cold pillows, put together like a barricade. Plus something resembling a towel arrangement?
"..the hell?" he takes one pillow after another, throwing them to far away corner of the room, digging thru your towel heart he is smoothing down the sheets with palm of his hand, when something rustles.
"You need to stop spoiling me so much, pretty boy." he read out loud, your note was accompanied by tiny little heart.
"So you seduce me, have your way with me and disappear next day? Not even kiss goodbye? Not even a breakfast? After all you did to me? Use me like if I am some kind of common SLUT?!" voice thunders between four white walls.
Furrowing eyebrows meet in the middle of forehead. Shaky fist crumples the poor piece of paper, letting it fly straight to the bin.
"Me, Choi Seungcheol, man worth billions, the face of Forbes 30 under 30(!!), won't be treated like that! No, no. Don't think so, Darling!" swearing with that same clenched fist asking any god who was watching for help.
Fully awake in matter of seconds, Seungcheol springs out of bed ready to get justice only for his legs to wobble, adventures of yesterday taking their toll, tumbling down to his knees. For the second time in span of 12 hours.
Pride -10! Ego -20!
--
We already established the fact that Seungcheol was an adventurous guy.
Emphasis on was.
However, he felt rather meek in dark depths of night, spread out in all his glory on hotel bed with your malleable tongue working him open.
"H-hey! Where do you think you are going???" he almost cried out
"Exactly where you need me to be" you rub your thumb over his pulsing, pretty, pink hole.
"Fuckfuckfuck. I don't think that's righ-" he has no time to finish as you forcefully pull him up by the hips, flush against your mouth.
"Oh? But I think this is so right, pretty boy. Be good for me?" Hot, slippery tongue lapping circles in his prohibited zone. You can feel him vibrating under your touch. You can hear his breathing getting louder. You can see his legs slowly opening on their own.
"Let me hear you, big boy" as you slam his hips on your waiting tongue. And then again. "Beg for me."
"p-please" Seungcheol couldn't think, Seungcheol couldn't breathe. Only thing he could do was to speed up his thrusts and meet your insatiable mouth halfway. It was a reflex really. It was a reflex for him to chase after the source of his pleasure as it was a reflex for you to whine into him. Body's natural reaction was making you drip on the crips white bedsheet under you.
"P-please d-don't stop" mouth agape as you slid one finger into his slacken hole. Other hand gripping his thigh harder. Nails digging into flesh.
"fuckfuckfuck, I will be good, I will be so soo good for you.. j-just don't stop." Oh no. You did not plan on stopping anytime soon. Hearing his pathetic pleas had your pussy squeezing around nothing.
"Turn around for me and I will give you whatever you need."
Seungcheol felt a bit dizzy from all the action but followed your instructions nevertheless. Falling apart in front of you.
"Such a good, good boy. Looking so handsome all open for me like this." eyes dark with lust, you bend over to meet his quivering lips, licking into his mouth.
"mmmf.. yes" shutting his eyes in bliss he gave you full access as you added a second finger. Curling them up, diving deeper inside of him. Searching for that special spot... Finding it and immediately hitting it vigorously.
"mmmf, I.. your good boy..yes" big hands shot straight to your hips, getting a handful in attempt to ground himself. Those rough hands were squeezing your flesh, thumbs were massaging circles into your skin as you danced with his tongue. Gently sucking on his plump bottom lip. Each moaning to the other's mouth..
The two fingers inside of him were pistoning without mercy. With each slap on his balls you could feel him squeezing you harder, swallowing you deeper. It was so obvious he was close.
"Such a little slut, aren't you, Cheollie?" grazing his ear with edge of your mouth. "Letting a woman you just met fuck your pretty ass.. That's not what good boys do." halting your movements altogether.
There it was. That nickname again. Such a little thing made his erection throb against your stomach. "P-please, I will do whatever, fuck, need you so bad."
"That bad, huh?"
"So so bad, touch me pleasepleaseplease, don't stop..I will do whatever you want!"
"Whatever I want?" you finally fit third finger into his completely messed up, stretched out hole.
"god yes"
"What is you credit card PIN?" sliding fingers almost all the way out jut to ram them right back in. Taking his breath away.
"8895" rumbles on without hesitation. Few sharp inhales, wiggling himself even deeper on your digits.
"Well done," you purr "now cum for me, pretty boy." Not much else had to be said or done. Seungcheol pulled you down by the back of your neck, locking your mouth in desperate kiss.
"thankyouthankyouthank you." Holding you right there, flush on his chest, while thumb of his other hand rubbed tight circles on your dripping heat - eager to please. Bucking his hips ungently into the palm of your hand.
He was such a good boy for you. So polite. Took all what you gave him. His shiny boba eyes, the moaning into your mouth, how he held you in place while eating your mouth alive, his thumb touching you exactly where you needed him, your fingers way too deep inside working on his high... It was all too much for little Lando Norris..
Just as he came undone, painting his bare torso white, you reached climax sobbing into his lips.
Nirvana +1!
--
Sitting on his knees in silent lonely hotel room Seungcheol noticed quite an empty space around his wrist and neck. Black leather wallet laid open on coffee table, visibly thinner than yesterday. Only his credit card was left. Ramming thru the rest of his belongings, he picked up the phone and dialled a number.
"It's me. Need you to find somebody." he bend down, fishing your little hand written note from the trash.
"You forgot to take my card, Darling" smirk on lips, he smooths out the paper and raises it to his eye level. Pressing small kiss on that tiny heart.
a/n: I have too much fun writing big strong men into pathetic bottoms. my requests are now open so go ahead and ask for a fic!
tags: @hanniebanggi , @sexygrass, @dunixxd join my tag list to get notified about new chapters - here
masterlist / requests
Cash never smelled so good.
What you laid your eyes on, after fishing Cheol's wallet out of his suit jacket, came as a surprise even to such seasoned scam veteran like you. 50k bills neatly rolled into a bundle, secured with elastic band, reminded you of old mafia movies. You were not sure why this man had, literally millions of Won on him but you were not one to complain. Chaebols were indeed built different. You could only be grateful to this real life Motherlode opportunity. In the same time it was more convenient to take his nice, clean, sparkly cash than cards. Purring knowingly at the sight of his black credit card but keeping it in its place.
Loot +1!
Smirking as you look back at the mess of a man, showing the treasure into your tiny purse. It barely fits. Absolute unit of a man who would usually strike fear to his enemies was laying peacefully in bed. So big but so spent. Dishevelled hair, blanket revealing most except his lower body. His dried up release from yesterday marking perfectly toned muscles. Strands of hair sticking to his forehead.
"You won't mind if I take this, will you?" asking with utmost politeness as you gently take his golden cross necklace off of him and dangle it around your neck.
"All that just for me? Oh, you shouldn't have~" pressing soft peck on his cute nose. The handsome man smiles from his dream and hums in agreement.
Loot +2!
"This will go together nicely." you chuckle, unclasping another treat. Obviously expensive bracelet on his wrist.
You didn't know much about modern jewellery, mostly being antiques and vintage aficionado, but you did know your gold and by the look and weight of this piece, it will earn you nice sum at your favourite pawn shop.
Loot +3!
The night was nearing it's end, muted red light slowly painting the sky, you were pleased by the outcome. Seungcheol was quite a treat, his fucked out puppy eyes filled with tears will most likely occupy your mind for the upcoming week. Unfortunately this would be the first and only time you see each other. Made it a rule for yourself to never go for the same man twice. It was just easier that way. And safer.
You smirk as you write a little goodbye note, leaving it next to his, deeply, breathing body.
"Hmm, something is missing.." you look around the messy hotel room to see bunch of fresh towels piled up on a cabinet.
"Perfect" you smirk as you arrange them into a heart around the note.
It will be better to get going and deposit your newfound fortune into your checking account. Before the princess wakes up.
Well, but this much cash.. will have to be split into smaller bits. After the banks passed new rule about the amount of money you can deposit without having to name source of income.. your head has been aching more than usual. Why make life harder than it already is?
"Sleep tight, pretty boy. Dream of me." You sigh as you fix Cheol's hair behind his ear and close the door behind you.
"Hmm, is it morning already? You really did a number on me, princess." eyes still closed shut, he rolls over to the other side of bed, in search of your warmth, only to be met with a bunch of cold pillows, put together like a barricade. Plus something resembling a towel arrangement?
"..the hell?" he takes one pillow after another, throwing them to far away corner of the room, digging thru your towel heart he is smoothing down the sheets with palm of his hand, when something rustles.
"You need to stop spoiling me so much, pretty boy." he read out loud, your note was accompanied by tiny little heart.
"So you seduce me, have your way with me and disappear next day? Not even kiss goodbye? Not even a breakfast? After all you did to me? Use me like if I am some kind of common SLUT?!" voice thunders between four white walls.
Furrowing eyebrows meet in the middle of forehead. Shaky fist crumples the poor piece of paper, letting it fly straight to the bin.
"Me, Choi Seungcheol, man worth billions, the face of Forbes 30 under 30(!!), won't be treated like that! No, no. Don't think so, Darling!" swearing with that same clenched fist asking any god who was watching for help.
Fully awake in matter of seconds, Seungcheol springs out of bed ready to get justice only for his legs to wobble, adventures of yesterday taking their toll, tumbling down to his knees. For the second time in span of 12 hours.
Pride -10! Ego -20!
--
We already established the fact that Seungcheol was an adventurous guy.
Emphasis on was.
However, he felt rather meek in dark depths of night, spread out in all his glory on hotel bed with your malleable tongue working him open.
"H-hey! Where do you think you are going???" he almost cried out
"Exactly where you need me to be" you rub your thumb over his pulsing, pretty, pink hole.
"Fuckfuckfuck. I don't think that's righ-" he has no time to finish as you forcefully pull him up by the hips, flush against your mouth.
"Oh? But I think this is so right, pretty boy. Be good for me?" Hot, slippery tongue lapping circles in his prohibited zone. You can feel him vibrating under your touch. You can hear his breathing getting louder. You can see his legs slowly opening on their own.
"Let me hear you, big boy" as you slam his hips on your waiting tongue. And then again. "Beg for me."
"p-please" Seungcheol couldn't think, Seungcheol couldn't breathe. Only thing he could do was to speed up his thrusts and meet your insatiable mouth halfway. It was a reflex really. It was a reflex for him to chase after the source of his pleasure as it was a reflex for you to whine into him. Body's natural reaction was making you drip on the crips white bedsheet under you.
"P-please d-don't stop" mouth agape as you slid one finger into his slacken hole. Other hand gripping his thigh harder. Nails digging into flesh.
"fuckfuckfuck, I will be good, I will be so soo good for you.. j-just don't stop." Oh no. You did not plan on stopping anytime soon. Hearing his pathetic pleas had your pussy squeezing around nothing.
"Turn around for me and I will give you whatever you need."
Seungcheol felt a bit dizzy from all the action but followed your instructions nevertheless. Falling apart in front of you.
"Such a good, good boy. Looking so handsome all open for me like this." eyes dark with lust, you bend over to meet his quivering lips, licking into his mouth.
"mmmf.. yes" shutting his eyes in bliss he gave you full access as you added a second finger. Curling them up, diving deeper inside of him. Searching for that special spot... Finding it and immediately hitting it vigorously.
"mmmf, I.. your good boy..yes" big hands shot straight to your hips, getting a handful in attempt to ground himself. Those rough hands were squeezing your flesh, thumbs were massaging circles into your skin as you danced with his tongue. Gently sucking on his plump bottom lip. Each moaning to the other's mouth..
The two fingers inside of him were pistoning without mercy. With each slap on his balls you could feel him squeezing you harder, swallowing you deeper. It was so obvious he was close.
"Such a little slut, aren't you, Cheollie?" grazing his ear with edge of your mouth. "Letting a woman you just met fuck your pretty ass.. That's not what good boys do." halting your movements altogether.
There it was. That nickname again. Such a little thing made his erection throb against your stomach. "P-please, I will do whatever, fuck, need you so bad."
"That bad, huh?"
"So so bad, touch me pleasepleaseplease, don't stop..I will do whatever you want!"
"Whatever I want?" you finally fit third finger into his completely messed up, stretched out hole.
"god yes"
"What is you credit card PIN?" sliding fingers almost all the way out jut to ram them right back in. Taking his breath away.
"8895" rumbles on without hesitation. Few sharp inhales, wiggling himself even deeper on your digits.
"Well done," you purr "now cum for me, pretty boy." Not much else had to be said or done. Seungcheol pulled you down by the back of your neck, locking your mouth in desperate kiss.
"thankyouthankyouthank you." Holding you right there, flush on his chest, while thumb of his other hand rubbed tight circles on your dripping heat - eager to please. Bucking his hips ungently into the palm of your hand.
He was such a good boy for you. So polite. Took all what you gave him. His shiny boba eyes, the moaning into your mouth, how he held you in place while eating your mouth alive, his thumb touching you exactly where you needed him, your fingers way too deep inside working on his high... It was all too much for little Lando Norris..
Just as he came undone, painting his bare torso white, you reached climax sobbing into his lips.
Nirvana +1!
--
Sitting on his knees in silent lonely hotel room Seungcheol noticed quite an empty space around his wrist and neck. Black leather wallet laid open on coffee table, visibly thinner than yesterday. Only his credit card was left. Ramming thru the rest of his belongings, he picked up the phone and dialled a number.
"It's me. Need you to find somebody." he bend down, fishing your little hand written note from the trash.
"You forgot to take my card, Darling" smirk on lips, he smooths out the paper and raises it to his eye level. Pressing small kiss on that tiny heart.
summary: jihoon's been pushed aside and ostracized from the moment he was born. completely alone, with no family and only a handful of friends, he's been too beaten down to expect anything good with the shitty cards life has dealt him. when he's presented with his new coworker, it's hard to not fantasize about her, but he'll never actually allow himself to believe she could ever look like him with anything but pity β just like everyone else.
content: loser!jihoon, antisocial!jihoon, sociallyawkward!jihoon, insecure!jihoon, sunshine!reader, jihoon is basically just a complete loser with horrible luck who's never felt true happiness (sorry), mentions of bullying, mentions of jihoon's sad past, sunshine!reader, slowburn, lots of worldbuilding but its just so u can feel sorry for jihoon lol, coworkers au, pining, miscommunication, afab reader, smut, sub!jihoon, virgin!jihoon, handjob, body worship, nipple play, dry humping, penetrative sex, etc.
wc: 14k
a/n: this was my fave concept to write so far honestly hehe
masterlist
Every week was the same.
Jihoon would get up, fix his overgrown hair the best he could, and take the train over to work.
This was as far as he'd gotten in life; an overly repetitive existence with no sense of joy within it.
He should've been happy. Things were better now. Being 27 with a stable job and no real issues in his life should be something to be grateful for, yet Jihoon found himself being completely displeased with his life.
Surely there must be more to life than this, right? A lonely and loveless life that appeared to be leading him nowhere. But still, things were better than before.
It was hard for Jihoon to speak of his childhood, much less his teenage years (or even his college life). It was all too grim. He'd grown to accept it, to let it all go, but the past had made him who he was, and he knew his current self was to blame for his loneliness. For his lack of love.
And so he continued his daily routine, living day after day with no change in sight. He accepted this with a flat smile, grateful that things were just fine. Not good, not great, not even varied, but just fine.
This week, though, finally had something different. But to Jihoon that was usually bad news.
Were you bad news?
You were the brand new thing in his life.
It was your first week in his office. A brand new face. A very pretty face.
Jihoon never thought about such things. He'd never had any romantic experience in his life. He had a long distance girlfriend once, but even that didn't work out. Too much distance, too many lies, too many complications. Jihoon just wasn't made for love.
So he never thought of such things again.
It was rare for him to even see a pretty girl on his day to day. His morning commute was far too early and filled with people way too old for him to even look in the eye without feeling disrespectful. His workplace, although consisted of a variety of people, was not a place where he felt very welcome initiating friendships or anything of the sort. Cliques had ended in high school, he thought, yet he found himself at the bottom of the food chain among his coworkers. He wasn't liked and was deliberately avoided by everyone around him.
Until you came along.
Finding you beautiful was no surprise to Jihoon. It was the most obvious thing in the world. Putting appearances aside, you were sunshine personified. Smart, confident, hardworking, gentle, nice, beautiful. You were everything anyone could ever want. At times Jihoon even wondered whether he wanted you or if he just wanted to be like you.
You'd caused an immense impression in him within the short time in which he'd known you.
He hadn't really gotten to know you on a personal level yet. But you had extended him an olive branch upon the first meeting, which was a memory that had implanted itself on his mind. It was rare for Jihoon to come by good memories.
This was the first time he'd felt accepted in a very long time. Yet the fears of it turning around and slapping him in the face (like in so many prior instances) was too big for him to really consider you good news in his life.
It was kind of embarrassing looking back at it. Jihoon hadn't been expecting you (how could he have?), but you suddenly showed up at his cubicle accompanied by one of his coworkers, Doyle.
Doyle wasn't someone Jihoon thought too much about β or at least he tried not to. He was the classic high school bully, except in a corporate-world wrapping. Jihoon had dealt with bullies his whole life, he'd become desensitized to it by now. Still, it bothered him to see him standing next to you. He hadn't met you yet, but he was immediately disheartened by the new girl at the office looking buddy-buddy with someone he considered an adversary.
What had been surprising to Jihoon, though, was your complete disinterest in Doyle's obvious advances.
It was pretty often that Doyle would attempt to assert his dominance by putting Jihoon down in front of other coworkers. He'd tease him and patronize him in front of anyone to see in order to show others who was in charge. And it was not Jihoon, that was for damn sure.
Jihoon got up as soon as he sensed a presence at his cubicle, somehow managing to stumble over his feet as he did so. When he looked up, he was not expecting you, yet there you were. Beautiful, smiling down at him with genuine interest in your eyes. You didn't know him, but you had kindness in your eyes. He could tell.
He stumbled over an introduction as Doyle interrupted him, telling you Jihoon's name and position at the company for him. Unwarranted and once again showing that if he so wished, he could speak over Jihoon.
But you'd interrupted him in return, turning to Jihoon to extend your hand with that smile never leaving your lips.
"Hi, it's really nice to meet you," you'd smiled as he felt fire at the mere handshake.
"Hi, I, uhm, I'm Jihoon. Lee Jihoon. I didn't realize we had someone new coming. It's nice to meet you. You- If you need anything, you can always ask me," he slapped himself mentally when he said it. He stuttered his way through it like a fucking loser. His immediate attraction to you was too obvious. Doyle's smirk as he stood beside you told him all he needed to know.
"Oh, that's so nice, thank you! I'm right next door. Well- right next cubicle, so I'll probably take you up on that sooner or later," you laughed at your own attempt of a joke.
Jihoon couldn't help chuckling back, ignoring Doyle as he patted your shoulder, laughing along. Jihoon noticed a short-lived discomfort in your eyes at the action, one which died when your eyes went back to him.
Was he imagining it, or were you showing preference towards Jihoon?
"Well, let's not bother our little Jihoonie here any longer," Doyle interrupted once more, "It's almost lunch time," he leaned in to tell you, looking down at Jihoon, "We all usually go to a burger joint nearby β Jihoonie here likes to stay in, so we try to stay out of his way."
That wasn't entirely true.
Once upon a time, Jihoon did attempt to join the rest of his coworkers in outings, but he was always alienated. After a few too many slights about his hair, his height, his weird choice in clothing, or even just his personality, he decided to stray away from anything that wasn't strictly professional when it came to his coworkers. He was always the butt of the joke, so he made the decision to isolate in the office with a cold sandwich he packed for himself every day.
Sometimes his friends Soonyoung and Mingyu from accounting would join him, but there was usually not enough time to see them during regular working hours. This left him alone most of the time.
Your face seemed to deflate at Doyle's words. Whether it was out of pity for Jihoon or annoyance at Doyle's overzealous confidence around you, he wasn't sure.
"Oh, I actually brought a packed lunch," you told Doyle before turning to face Jihoon again, "Would it be okay if I stay in with you?", you looked at him with expectant eyes.
"You wanna, uhm, have lunch with me?", he asked dumbly and you nodded, "Y-yeah, that'd be nice, yes," he attempted a shy smile, succeeding when you returned it.
Doyle cleared his throat, interrupting the silent smiles you and Jihoon were sharing.
"Well, I could stay in with you if you want, I-"
But you interrupted him again.
"That's fine. I don't wanna get in the way of your plans. Jihoon will make fine company," you said politely, stepping away from Doyle to head over to your desk, popping back next to Jihoon with a brown paper bag.
Doyle looked dumbfounded for a few moments before masking it with a tight smile. Jihoon simply stood there as you pulled up a chair and settled it on Jihoon's desk, paying no mind to Doyle.
"I guess I'll leave you two to it. I'll keep showing you around after lunch. You have my number if you need anything," Doyle made emphasis on that last statement, offering you what looked like a genuine smile before giving Jihoon a look that told him he still felt victorious in the end.
"Thanks, Doyle! Bye!," you smiled back before turning to Jihoon.
Lunch was incredibly awkward for Jihoon. But that wasn't your fault. You'd been incredibly nice, asking him questions and keeping the conversation going despite the mumbly, shy mess Jihoon was. The conversation was entirely carried by you, with you surprisingly taking an interest in him. Every word, every gesture, they all led him to believe you were genuinely nice.
At the same time, he felt entirely delusional.
It wasn't often that people were nice to him, so it was likely he was building it up to be more than it actually was. You likely did not want to stay in with him, but after Doyle brought up that Jihoon was the only one in the office during lunch break, you had no option but to join him since you also planned to stay in. However, you were a good team player, Jihoon believed. Not many people would sacrifice their lunch to stay in with the black sheep of the office just to rid yourself of any possible awkwardness. Jihoon knew damn well many previous coworkers had gone out of their way to avoid him before.
But despite the belief that you simply pitied him, Jihoon missed your time spent together the moment it ended. He felt shy and blushed bright red at every single word uttered from you, but it had been the nicest interaction he'd had in a long time (a long, long time).
That had happened last Wednesday, repeating itself on Thursday, Friday, and then a whole weekend was spent with Jihoon solely thinking about you. Time that he usually spent reading or playing chess online was instead used up to think about you. It was mostly to overthink every tiny interaction and panic over it, but it was was still preoccupied by you.
But he also thought about other things.
How beautiful he found you to be. How nice, funny, hardworking, smart and riveting you were (despite this being an assessment he'd made in less than a week of knowing you). This was Jihoon's first crush in ... he couldn't even remember how long.
And it was terrible.
Every crush he'd ever had had turned out terribly. Harmless elementary school crushes turned into pranks pulled by his classmates in order to embarrass him. Prepubescent middle school crushes became false confessions that led to public embarrassment. Hopeless high school crushes were nothing but a farse that led him into giving up altogether.
Throughout his practically non-existent love life, Jihoon had always been met by nothing but discouragement, sometimes by simple rejection and other times by harassment from people who believed him to be unworthy of being liked. These were memories he did not like to relive, but the resurgence of feelings for someone brought them all back.
And so he was unsure of how to feel. He was unsure of whether to let himself like you or recoil, unwilling to even try.
"Hey, Jihoon, do you think you could help me with this?", you asked him on Monday.
After spending all weekend thinking about you, Monday finally came. He was unsure as to whether or not your friendly behavior would continue onto your second week, when you were more settled in. In the usual cold and reserved fashion he'd adopted for the past decade, he avoided you most of the morning. When he saw you in the elevator upon arriving at the office, he stalled, waiting for the door to close so he wouldn't have to share the ride with you. He hadn't wanted to avoid you so blatantly, but apparently his past trauma had taken control of his body at the time.
If you noticed, he hadn't realized. He hoped you hadn't.
And now, a few hours into the day, you were asking for his help, and even his anxieties couldn't prevent him from helping you. He wanted to be good to you. At the moment, it was what he wanted most. He was unsure as to why.
He got up, hands fidgeting together as he took the few steps over to your desk, awkwardly standing next to your seat as you turned towards the computer on screen. Taking a few steps closer, he cleared his throat, standing right behind you and leaning down in order to check out whatever was on screen before you began to explain.
"So sorry to bother you, Jihoon! I, uh, I was just wondering what I should do when I get this pop-up? I tried looking over the manual, but I couldn't find anything," you pointed over at the screen, eyes still on it, "It's just-"
Jihoon invertedly leaned closer, eyes also on the screen. As soon as he looked at what was on display, he locked in, fully focused on the issue at hand.
Surprisingly even to himself, Jihoon enjoyed his job. He was amazing at it, and getting to help you out was just a bonus.
"Oh, yeah. It's a glitch. It happens sometimes. Here, let me just ..."
Without thinking, he interrupted you, hands taking over your mouse and keyboard as he leaned impossibly closer without realizing it. His head was right next to yours, but since he was too focused on the task at hand, he did not have the realization to be flustered at the proximity. And then he fucked up even further.
Continuing to help you, he began rambling out explanations about what he was currently doing on screen. He rambled on and on, showing you step by step how to handle the issue and adding on extra details the average person would not concern themselves with. He was so into it, he didn't realize he went on for a good five minutes, all while you sat next to him, staring quietly at the screen as you watched his every move.
That was until he was abruptly interrupted.
"Jesus Christ, Jihoon, you're going to make the girl never want to ask for help again," Doyle's voice suddenly rang through, a mocking yet patronizing tone wrapped around every word.
Jihoon's movements halted when he heard a few giggles from other coworkers resounding at Doyle's statement. Slowly, he backed his hands away from the mouse, barely registering how close he was to you when his face turned to your own, finding you looking at him with a worried look on your face β he couldn't decipher what it meant, but he was too embarrassed to even think of it.
He jumped back at the proximity, mumbling out an apology with a bow of his head.
"S-sorry, I-"
"Yeah, yeah. It's fine, Jihoon, we all know you get a little over excited sometimes," Doyle leaned over the other side of the desk, "Don't mind him, Y/N. You'll learn to tune out his rambling at some point, we've all had to β that, or you'll go crazy."
Doyle turned around after that, throwing a wink over at you that, for some reason, made Jihoon wince.
Yeah, okay. He was a fucking loser, he was well aware. The reminder felt like overkill at this point in his life.
Like a dog with his tails between his legs, Jihoon looked down, giving you one last pathetic 'sorry' before turning away. Not even chancing a single glance your way after Doyle's interruption, he preferred to save himself further embarrassment and left the room altogether. He had done most of his work and lunch was close. Taking an early lunch seemed like the best idea.
Hastily, he grabbed the lunch bag under his desk and walked towards the exit, ears barely registering a faint 'Jihoon' coming from the direction he had just left.
~
Today, he'd chosen to leave the office for lunch.
Well, not really. He'd just stepped outside, finding some empty bench in front of the building to sit at. It wasn't like he could eat at his desk as per usual when everyone else was still there. He just couldn't stay there after being shut down like that in front of you.
All things considered, it hadn't been the most embarrassing thing to happen to him, but it still left him feeling like an absolute loser.
The worst of it all had been that you'd seen it all and hadn't even reacted.
It's not like he had expected you to stand up for him. Hell, you barely knew him. Maybe it was just easiest to engage with the majority; to laugh along when Doyle made a joke, joining in on the muted laughter of all his other coworkers any time Jihoon was used as the butt of some joke.
Except that you didn't laugh. Jihoon didn't even register your reaction before leaving, instead reacting in the same fashion as a toddler throwing a tantrum.
Fuck, you probably thought he was a fucking baby on top of already thinking of him as some defenseless loser. Jihoon wanted to blame it all on Doyle, but it was also his fault.
"Jihoon?"
His train of thought was interrupted by a sudden voice, startling him into squeezing his hands around the unbitten sandwich he'd been holding this whole time.
Turning to the voice, he found you standing there, paper bag in hand as you hesitated walking closer.
When he turned to you, mouth agape in surprise at your sudden appearance, you took a few steps forward, likely taking his silence as an okay. Like a fish out of water, he opened and closed his eyes a few times, unknowing of what to say. He really hadn't expected you to follow him out.
Dropping his sandwich, he cursed at himself. He attempted to catch it, but his hand to eye coordination had never been the best, so it just resulted in him fumbling his hands like an idiot before his sandwich met its demise on the dirty floor.
"Fuck, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to catch you off guard," you apologized, rushing to the floor in front of him, squatting in front of him as you picked up his fallen lunch.
"I-It's fine, I-"
"No, Jihoon, I've already ruined your day enough, fuck. And now your lunch is ruined," you sounded genuinely disappointed, "Here, we can share my lunch! I'll make it up to you tomorrow, I promise."
You remained kneeling in front of him as he sat on the bench. Jihoon cringed at knowing your skirt would get dirty at its contact with the floor but you didn't seem to care. Instead, you looked up at him with worry towards him. Your eyebrows were furrowed and your bottom lip stuck out a bit in a small pout. It was both adorable and nerve-wracking.
"Please get up, you'll get your skirt dirty," was all he found himself saying.
Jihoon caught you chuckling under your breath before getting up, dusting your skirt and then taking a seat next to him. The distance you allowed between the two of you was too small for Jihoon's well-being, but a part of him deep down was happy about him.
You looked down at your lap for a bit, so did Jihoon. The two of you were quiet for a few seconds, but Jihoon was unsure why. You appeared to be bashful, perhaps even a little shy? It was strange to see. There was no reason for you to feel shy around Jihoon. He was the mess here. He was the one who should be avoiding eye contact, hiding himself away from you to ensure he didn't ruin things between you β Things, as if the two of you were anything at all. He was overthinking things again.
"Jihoon," you interrupted his train of thought.
"Hmm? Yeah?"
Idiot.
"I, uhm, I'm sorry about what happened back there," you began. Jihoon almost interrupted you, shaking his head and raising his hands to halt you, but you shook your own head, continuing, "I should've said something. I know I'm new, but god, Doyle's such an idiot. You didn't deserve that, especially since it was my fault. I'm really sorry."
Your eyes showed nothing but sincerity as you spoke. A certain worry reflected in your face, making Jihoon's heart soar, crumbling with some sort of guilt he didn't understand.
He had no idea how to react.
"I- I'm sorry," he stuttered, "I didn't- It's not your fault. I didn't mean to make you feel like-"
"What? No, Jihoon, I'm apologizing. You just wanted to help me and I wasn't appreciative. I should've told Doyle to get fucked," you put your lunch bag aside, scooting over a little closer and hesitating a bit before grabbing onto one of his hands, "I'm really sorry. I hope this doesn't hurt our friendship."
"Friendship?"
You flushed at his question, "Yeah, I, uh, aren't we friends? I know it's only been a few days, but-"
"Yes! We're friends, I'm sorry," you gave him a look, "Right, sorry, force of habit. Fuck, okay, I'll stop now," his hand itched in yours as you chuckled at him, "I ... Thank you. It's really nice of you to come check up on me. Don't, uh, feel like you have to stand up for me. Doyle's just ... well, what you said. I wouldn't want you to get picked on too."
"Don't worry about that, Jihoon. He wouldn't do that. He likes me," you revealed casually.
"What?"
"He asked me out last Friday, but I turned him down."
Jihoon's hand tightened around yours without him realizing. That revelation made him feel something he'd never felt before. It was as if his heart dropped while his jaw tightened. It might've been annoyance, but it felt stronger than that. Doyle? Doyle liked you? That bit was not shocking to Jihoon. But the fact that he'd asked you out surprised him. Did he have no care for you as a coworker? You were new, for god's sakes! What you needed was guidance, a friend, a colleague willing to walk you through the work like he needed back when he first started. Yet Doyle was instead choosing to-
"Jihoon? Are you okay?"
Fuck. He'd been rambling internally again. If Jihoon had a nickel for every time he embarrassed himself in front of you ..
"Yeah, uhm, sorry. Just, uh, don't really get along very well with Doyle."
"Can't imagine why," you said sarcastically, "Is there a story behind it?"
Your hand left his own at some point during your conversation, instead going to empty out your paper bag and absentmindedly split the sandwich you had in there. Without saying anything, you offered him a half, smiling in encouragement when he hesitated to take it.
"I, uh, it's nothing. Just dumb workplace drama," he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, "I'm just not too good at standing up for myself."
That sure was a way to downplay it. But Doyle truly wasn't the sole culprit to Jihoon's history with alienation. This had been his entire life. Jihoon had grown far too accustomed to being harassed in every way imaginable. From alienation, to physical beatings, to even having his life threatened, Jihoon had gone through it all. Back in his youth, he wondered if it'd been something he'd done. If maybe he was just unlikable and that was why everyone either avoided him or attempted to make his life even more miserable. As he grew, he began to wonder if perhaps it'd been due to growing up without any proper socialization. His parents had, well, not really existed β something which pained him to think about β which left him sad and alone for most of his upbringing. This was probably why he was never able to properly interact with other people, leaving him as an easy and defenseless target.
It wasn't a secret to Jihoon that he was weird. And even that was an understatement. As a young boy, he was always into things that most people found strange. He was too focused on books and anything that could expand his intellect. This was followed by his incessant need to babble about his niche interests to anyone willing to listen (which was usually no one). He quickly into his teenage years that this was not welcomed by people β usually learning it through patronizing teasing or some classmates taking on physical means to shut him up. Unfortunately, even as an adult, he'd continued to make this mistake, thinking that maybe he'd meet people who enjoyed his eccentric personality without shutting him down. He'd done it at this same job, immediately learning that his input (or his personality in general) were not very well appreciated.
"But that's still not okay, he shouldn't-"
"Hey, it's fine, really," he smiled at you, "It's more than enough that you'd wanna, uh," he hesitated, "that you'd want to be my friend. You know, with all things considered."
"Are you kidding? You're easily the funnest person in the office," you moved past the subject, likely understanding it was a sore spot for him, "Everyone else is kind of stuck up, honestly."
"Hmm, yeah? I can believe that."
He went on to take a bite from the sandwich you'd offered him, humming at finally being able to fulfill some of his hunger.
"What, they're mean to you but you won't even say anything bad about them?" you gaped at him.
He shrugged, "It's not productive. I don't hate them."
"Wow. You're a way better person than I am, Lee Jihoon," you sounded impressed as you said it.
And that was more than good enough for him.
Jihoon's friendship with you continued to flourish during the upcoming months after that.
Any other instance in which Jihoon would've usually cowered under the targeted disdain of his coworkers was instead met with your intervention. You'd usually interrupt, somehow turning the conversation away from him or even subtly shooting back against whoever had decided to snark at Jihoon.
The first few times had him blushing an embarrassing shade of red, stammering as he attempted to respond or even just appear normal at what had just occurred. He'd never experienced someone standing up for him, much less did he feel like he deserved it. Having your presence in such uncomfortable circumstances was more than enough to aid him, but knowing that you wanted to defend him made his heart go crazy.
Within the short time that he'd known you, it was obvious to Jihoon that, against all his attempts to prevent it, he'd developed a crush on you.
Under any other set of circumstances, that might've been fine. However, Jihoon had never in his life been under normal circumstances.
Crushing on you was entirely too terrifying. You were the most perfect girl he'd ever met β the only girl he'd allowed himself to be interested in in far too many years. He knew deep within him that he could not allow these feelings to continue flourishing, but he had never been quite good at burying his emotions.
It felt so high school. All of it. He was the loser outcast and you were the pretty cheerleader the quarterback was chasing after. The only difference was that unlike in high school, you were giving him the time of day.
Back in school, any time Jihoon found himself liking a girl, he was never met with reciprocation. Which was fine, of course. There were a few instances, though, in which it went further than lack of reciprocation, or even just rejection. Jihoon would need more than two hands to count the amount of romantic humiliations he'd undergone in his life.
There had been instances where he was confessed to as a joke, or even times when he was led to believe his feelings were mutual, only to be rejected in some cruel way. It felt like out of a movie at times.
Jihoon supposed he couldn't really blame others for their childish games. He was an easy target, lacking any familial or any sort of adult protection during his youth. Plus, he knew his victimhood was only a phase of these people's lives.
It was strange, however, that staying at the bottom of the totem pole throughout his life just seemed to become normalcy for him. He expected that once he grew, got a respecting job and found more friends that he'd move up in social hierarchy β or at least stop being metaphorically beaten down at every turn (he was at least grateful that the beatings were now metaphorical rather than literal).
You were the complete opposite of him.
In the time he'd known you, he'd come to find out that your life up until now had been nothing short of picture-perfect. You made friends easily in the office, even befriending people outside of your department you had no obligation of interacting with. And this was not new to you. You'd let Jihoon in on your childhood, telling him about your years as a cheerleader in high school, even riding that cheerleader wave all the way to college. Your entire life had been spent happy and surrounded by people who enjoyed your company.
Yet, somehow, your company of choice had become Jihoon.
Being chosen, wanted β even if just platonically β was something Jihoon had never experienced. His brain would override every single time he saw you, attempting both to not fuck things up between you and to leave his crush dormant.
This proved incredibly difficult at times. Any time you subtly stood up for him, or any time you smiled at him before leading him outside for lunch (at the bench that had now become your place. Yours and Jihoon's) together, or even when you'd simply scoot your chair slightly closer to his own during meetings, Jihoon felt himself sink deeper and deeper. His heart and his brain were constantly working against each other.
Tonight would be his hardest battle as of yet.
The two of you had yet to see each other outside of work in the past two months you'd known each other. This was fine to Jihoon. More than fine, actually. It gave him time away from you to recover from the palpitations your mere presence caused him (which required quite a lot of time).
Tonight, however, was the in which night he'd begrudgingly agreed to join you and the rest of your department on a night out.
Apparently these happened every few weeks. Jihoon had never known about them. Figures.
You were an active participant of these outings, usually insisting that Jihoon tag along, that you'd be there and would not leave his side (God help him). He'd even come to find that his friends Soonyoung and Mingyu from accounting would be there. The realization that he was such a hermit that he didn't even know his closest friends hung out outside of work without him did bother him a little.
And so he agreed. Against his better judgment, he let your pout and your wide eyes talk him into going to a bar with people (mostly) he knew hated him.
~
Jihoon had been unsure of how to dress.
When he'd texted Mingyu about it, he'd been met with a three-way call between him, Gyu and Soonyoung celebrating his first social outing in months. And then he'd been berated about showing off his 'assets,' whatever that meant.
Sure, Jihoon knew he was more fit than the average person, but this was something he usually felt shy about. He believed himself to be overcompensating for everything else he lacked in his person, both physical and personality-wise. So, it was safe to say that most of his clothes did not show off his assets.
Still, he made the attempt to follow both Mingyu's and Soonyoung's advice when it came to dressing up. Even if his crush was currently forced down a basement and locked away, he still had some dumb desire of impressing you.
You impressed him every day, whether you meant to or not. There was no dress code at his company, but formal attire was pretty much the norm, and you ... you worked with it quite amazingly, if Jihoon had anything to say. From the pencil skirts to the perfectly tailored dress shirts and blouses, you always left Jihoon working overtime to avert his eyes to more respectable places.
And so today he wanted to impress you. Donning some tighter jeans than usual (to show off his lust-worthy legs, had said Soonyoung) and a dress shirt unbuttoned just enough to give way to his chest (which Mingyu had called 'sculpted to the gods'), Jihoon moved on to his hair. He'd come to realize that unlike most other people, you really liked his hair. You constantly complimented the length and the pale tone of it. Bleaching his hair was something he'd started to do once he graduated college. He wanted some sort of separation away from his hometown when he'd moved away to work at the company, and despite the constant negative feedback, he'd decided to keep it.
He opted to let it down tonight, diffusing it after washing it to ensure some volume and a slight wave to it.
He looked fine, he thought. Jihoon didn't have any particular positive opinion about his appearance, but at least he'd gone from thinking himself a hideous hermit to simply okay. But according to Mingyu and Soonyoung, who'd offered to drive him, he looked like sex waiting to happen.
Blushing, Jihoon was unsure as to whether he wanted that to come true or not.
~
The hardest part had been arriving at the bar.
You were the first person he spotted as he and his friends walked in. The place was packed with members of your office, people he'd only seen in passing as he made his way over to his floor gathered with coworkers he wished he didn't know as well as he did.
But all of that left his mind immediately upon registering it. You were his priority. And everyone else's it seemed. Various men in your vicinity had their eyes on you, Doyle included.
Jihoon couldn't blame them. How in the world could he when you looked like that?
You were completely ignorant to any of the attention you were receiving. Standing by the bar, you were nursing a drink, leaning your body against it and giving Jihoon (and everyone else) the perfect view of your form. The slip dress you were wearing was shorter than the usual skirts you wore at school, allowing your legs to receive the well-deserved attention of anyone willing to appreciate the beauty before them.
This was the most skin Jihoon had seen of you. It made him feel like a depraved pervert to stand there and just stare, but he was hypnotized. The fleeting thought of getting to do more than just see passed through his mind, sending shivers down his spine. He had to shake his head to remove any filthier thoughts from entering his mind. He felt embarrassed and idiotic involving you in such thoughts. A sad, lonely virgin using his one and only female friend to feed himself with such thoughts was incredibly sick and deprived and-
"Dude, stop drooling. You haven't even said hi yet."
Mingyu nudged at him, breaking him away from his trance at once. Jihoon shook his head again to reset, coughing awkwardly as he attempted to negate what Mingyu had said, only to be interrupted by the other guy he'd arrived with.
"You look like sex on legs, man. Go talk to her. We'll go find a table. Come find us if you fuck everything up somehow," Soonyoung received a swift punch to his shoulder at his comment, but shrugged it off as he gave Jihoon thumbs up, walking away with Mingyu.
Taking a deep breath, Jihoon walked over to you, finding you still distracted by your drink.
Before he could even announce his presence, you sensed him, turning back and immediately offering him a wide smile. Good, you were happy to see him.
"Jihoon!," you left your drink on the counter to engage with him in a hug. His arms hovered over your waist, avoiding direct contact both for his sanity and out of respect.
Physical contact had never been Jihoon's forte. Usually he'd need some sort of warning ahead of time in order to mentally prepare himself. When it came to you, he so badly wanted his proclivity against physical touch to burn and die in a fire. He found himself craving your hug the moment you pulled away.
"I honestly thought you wouldn't come," you chuckled.
"I promised I'd come," he smiled back.
"C'mon, let's get you a drink. On me," you turned back to the bar, flagging down the bartender before turning back to him, "You don't seem like a big drinker. Is a beer okay?", he nodded at you as you handed him the drink.
The two of you leaned against the bar after that, letting silence between you consume you. Jihoon wasn't sure what to say. This was the first time he'd seen a girl outside of work in ... well, ever. And it wasn't just any girl β it was you.
"You look beautiful," he braved, finishing it off with an awkward cough.
Your body turned to his, a shy smile being hidden behind a lip bite, "Yeah? High compliment coming from you."
"H-hmm?"
"Jihoon, you look amazing," you emphasized, "I had no idea you were hiding all this under those baggy suits," your hands went to play with the neck of his collar, "Maybe unbutton it one more?", you said as you did so, "There, that's better."
Jihoon burned up. A tomato's red shade could not compare to how red his ears must've been at that moment. He flushed, breath hitching at your fingers gracing the skin of his chest. All he could do was clear his throat and advert his eyes, awkwardly smiling and nodding at you.
"You're cute," you giggled.
"Uhm, are you drunk?", he couldn't help in asking.
You giggled again, "I'm not, Jihoon. Is it that hard to believe I find you cute? Because you are. I don't know how you don't realize. You've been getting eye-fucked by those girls over there since you walked in," you pointed behind him, leading him to find two girls attempting at subtly looking his way, whispering among each other.
"O-oh, uhm, I'm sure that's not what they're doing," he stumbled, flushed.
"Uh-huh. Anyways, c'mon. I hate hanging out at the bar. Let's find a table," you grabbed onto his wrist then, pulling him towards the back of the bar.
On his way to the table of your choosing, he spotted his two friends, receiving a childish thumbs up from Soonyoung and a mouthed 'my man!' from Mingyu. He groaned internally, shaking his head and frowning at them. Once you made it to an empty table, you even commented on it.
"Those are Soonyoung and Mingyu, right? I'd never actually met them before. Come here with them?"
"Oh, yeah. I- ignore them, they're just being dumb," he scoffed lightly.
His hands laid flat on the table, unknowing of what to do with them. Your demeanor was way more relaxed than his own. It was clear to anyone around that you could blend into any environment. Jihoon, in the meantime, had trouble adjusting practically anywhere, especially at a social pool such as a bar.
"It's fine, Jihoonie, they're just rooting for you," you winked at him before enveloping the straw of your own drink in your mouth.
Jihoon decided not to overthink that (or maybe save it for later), also swinging at his own drink to avoid more awkward words leaving his mouth. He wasn't even sure why he was being such a socially inept mess. The two of you had had long-winded conversations at work many times before, maybe it was just the current setting. It felt the way he assumed a date would, except that it wasn't.
"Hmm, can I have a sip? My drink's too sweet. Here, have a taste," you went to grab at his beer, shoving your pink drink to his side of the table.
Looking down at the straw, he noticed the red shimmer of your lipstick on it, gulping at the thought of letting his lips touch it. But before he could psych himself out, he did it.
Before actually sipping at the drink, he allowed himself taste the lipstick. It was a sick and depraved thing to do, but he couldn't help himself. If this was as much of you as he could have, then he'd take it. The cherry tang it left on his lips made it worth it, but he couldn't let himself to enjoy it for too long. The drink itself had been entirely too sweet, causing his nose to scrunch up, which immediately earned a giggle from across the table.
"Sweet, huh? I should've gone for a beer, but I figured you wouldn't mind sharing," you shrugged as you took another swing of it, handing it back afterwards.
Now his eyes landed on his own beer bottle, eyeing that same glimmer on the mouth of the bottle. Without thinking of it, he took an swing of it, dropping the bottle too harshly back on the table before looking back at you. There, his eyes couldn't help but finding your lips. He tried being subtle, but he seemed to be lacking that skill at the moment.
"Oh, is my lipstick smudged?," your hand went up to your mouth. You fished your purse for a compact mirror and a set of two tubes, smiling at him before beginning to reapply, "It's such a hassle. That's why I never wear darker lip products at work," you said mostly to yourself. Then, you turned to him, plumping your lips before smiling, "How's it look?"
There was absolutely no way you weren't hitting on him. Jihoon may have been an absolute idiot when it came to any social interaction, but he was sure you'd been hinting at something all night. Right?
This was the perfect moment for him to flirt back. To compliment you, to woo you and make his interest known. If any moment was tailored for such a thing, it was this one. Jihoon just needed to grow some balls for once and be assertive.
However, that is not what he did.
Instead of coming up with some charming one-liner, Jihoon instead stumbled over his words, delivering a mixture of 'uhm, yea!' and 'looks great!,' completely emotionless while also awkward.
Fortunately for Jihoon, all you did was giggle in return. It sometimes felt both demeaning and like a relief when you'd giggle in return to his awkwardness. He hoped to elicit different reactions out of you, but that fault fell completely on him.
You eyed the bar behind him, causing him to turn back. There was a small area that was supposed to make up a dancefloor. This wasn't exactly a club, but the dancing scene appeared pretty turned up. Jihoon could even spot his two friends on the dancefloor with some girls unknown to him.
When his head turned back to face you, you smiled at him, opening your mouth to speak. Jihoon could see where this was going.
"Hey, Jihoon. Wanna dance with me?"
You were grinning as you asked. That overexcitement that was usually present on your face was there once more. Disappointing you with a rejection was the very last thing Jihoon wanted to do. It was literally how he'd ended up out tonight.
But, still, his idiocy knew no limits, apparently.
"Oh, uh, I- I don't dance," he stammered, "Sorry."
He went back to nursing his drink, eyes avoiding yours and closing off from further questions. When he looked back up, he was mortified to find some dejection in your eyes.
He needed to salvage this. He was a good enough dancer. He had no idea why he'd even said no in the first place.
"I, uh, actually, I could-"
"Hey, beautiful. If he won't dance, I'll take you out for a spin. I'll give her back in a bit, Jihoon, don't worry."
Jihoon's abrupt interruption was, of course, delivered by Doyle. Why he had been close enough to make out your conversation, Jihoon had no idea. It irritated him, though. That was for damn sure.
Jihoon knew you wouldn't say yes to him. After the endless lunch breaks you'd spent together, you'd become privy to Doyle's treatment of Jihoon. And although you never once actually acted on the negative feelings that had inspired against Doyle, you had still expressed to Jihoon how much such things had dampened your view of him.
What Jihoon hadn't considered, though, had been the very frustrating concept of peer pressure making an appearance.
A few other coworkers at a nearby table started to instigate, encouraging you to go join Doyle. Claims that he was a great dancer and that you'd look good out there together were thrown around. Each comment made Jihoon sink more and more into his seat. At some point, one of the girls in your neighboring cubicles even walked over to you, grabbing your hand to further encourage you to accept Doyle's offer.
You appeared troubled. From Jihoon to Doyle to the girls, you looked back and forth, mouth opening and closing without an actual response leaving you. An uncomfortable smile was on your lips the entire time.
It was obvious to Jihoon you simply did not want to leave him to his own devices. You'd promised so, after all. So he decided to take you out of your misery.
Getting up, he cleared his throat, "Go ahead. I, uh, I'll just go hang out with Gyu and Soon. I kinda ditched them earlier."
He added a little white lie to really sell it. His friends wanted him to stay with you, but he didn't want to force you to not have fun. He had his chance, twice, and stupidly missed it.
"See? Jihoon's busy. This isn't really his scene anyway. C'mon," and so Doyle managed to pull you away.
As you walked away, you turned back to Jihoon, but he was faster. You mentioned going to find him after you were done, but Jihoon tuned it out. Walking away in order to get to his friends, he could hear a short exchange between a few comments made by some coworkers. They weren't anything new, but they still bothered him at this moment.
"They'd made such a cute couple, huh?"
"Yeah! I heard Y/N was head cheerleader in high school. Doyle used to be a quarterback. It's literally like fanfiction."
"Yeah. Jihoon, though ... I don't think that'd work. He's too fucking awkward."
"A bit of a weirdo too. She's out of his league."
And then he was out of earshot.
He found Soonyoung sitting by some table near the entrance quick enough, he thanked god for that. He needed to at least not be alone right now.
"Dude! What are you doing here? What happened to your girl?", Soonyoung was quick to question.
Jihoon shrugged, taking a seat dejectedly.
"Oh, shit, man. I'm sorry," Soonyoung caught on, patting Jihoon on the back, "What happened?"
Jihoon simply gestured north of him, directing Soonyoung's eyes to the dancefloor you were currently at. You'd quickly warmed up to the mood, a smile gracing your face as you danced along with a few of the girls from the office. The silver lining was that you weren't actually dancing with Doyle as originally intended, but rather dancing near him. Still, Jihoon could see Doyle occasionally make his way to you and try to subtly get you to dance with him.
"Fuck. It's that asshole Doyle, huh? I'm sorry, man."
"What happened?", Mingyu suddenly showed up, sweaty and out of breath.
"That dick Doyle took Hoonie's girl," this was met with a frown and an expletive from Mingyu.
"She's not my girl. She's not my anything," Jihoon grumbled, "I think I'll just go home."
Getting up, he was stopped by Mingyu, pleading he stay and have fun. Similar complaints were given by Soonyoung. But neither were enough for Jihoon to want to stay. He'd been an idiot and done nothing to even try and match your energy. It was no wonder you left at the first chance you had.
"I only came to hang out with her," Jihoon sighed sadly, "I'll just see you guys next weekend, okay? Have fun without me."
He hugged each goodbye, disregarding their pouts and heading out. He didn't bother looking back, not wanting to sadden himself even more.
"You're lying to me."
Both Mingyu and Soonyoung stared at Jihoon like puppies awaiting a treat. Their metaphorical tails were practically wagging. It was unnerving. Especially because of the subject at hand.
Jihoon had decided to take the Monday off. He'd decided to grovel over what happened. After what happened last night, he felt like a complete loser facing you at work. Like an idiot, he'd let his feelings get all muddled and made himself believe that maybe you had some interest in him. Only to immediately fuck things up and leave you alone with the guy who was his literal antithesis. Not only that, but he'd left you there without even saying goodbye despite having agreed to be there for the sole reason of being with you.
After four o'clock, Jihoon should've known that his two nosey friends would come find him. It was rare for Jihoon to miss work, so their sudden knocking a few hours after clocking out was predictable.
However, they'd been the ones to shock Jihoon. They had shit-eating grins when he'd let them in. They'd managed to sit through a quick lunch prepared by Jihoon before spilling what had them in such an annoying mood.
"Dude, she came looking for you after you left," had said Mingyu.
"She looked sad as fuck when we told her you left! Then today when you didn't show up to work, she-" then Soonyoung was interrupted by an overexcited Mingyu.
"She asked us for your address, dude! Came all the way to accounting all shy and shit and asked if we thought it'd be okay if you stopped by," Mingyu had finished.
Jihoon spent a few minutes in surprised silence after that. The belief that they were playing a prank on him was the most logical to him.
"Dude, we're not lying!," Soonyoung exclaimed, nudging Mingyu so he'd confirm his statement.
"Yeah, she said she'd stop by in a few hours. We had to clock out early to come warn you."
"You clocked out early cause you hate working," Jihoon rebutted."
"Okay, two things can be true at once."
"Anyways, she'll be here at any moment. So you should doll yourself up for her. I have no idea what she may want, but-"
Mingyu interrupted this time, "Are you kidding? They're gonna fuck. It's going to be a k-drama moment and then they'll seal the deal."
Soonyoung made an O face and gave Gyu a high-five. The children in front of Jihoon were beginning to drive him insane. And usually he would've scolded them, but their words were making him too anxious to think.
Suddenly, Jihoon got up, ushering them out.
"Okay, get the hell out of here. I need to be ready for her, fuck. Fuck. I should've just gone to work today, I'm such an idiot," he groaned to himself, beginning to pick up their plates so he could tidy up the place a bit.
"Dude, calm down. It'll be fine. Clearly she cares if she's coming to check up on you after just one day of you being gone," Soonyoung reasoned, "Whatever happened to a phone call anyway?"
"This is the romantic way to do it, Soon, c'mon."
Mingyu shrugged in agreement, now dragging Soonyoung along with him towards the exit. Their goodbyes were as prolonged as per usual, but Jihoon was eventually able to get them out of his apartment.
Jihoon rushed to make the place as tidy as possible, even fixing himself up as best as he could whilst also looking casual. The hardest hurdle was coming up with non-pathetic reasons as to why he'd left in such a rush last night and why he had skipped work altogether.
How was he supposed to explain that he was a sensitive, good for nothing, pathetic, loser piece of-
But there was a knock before he could even finish a single thought.
He knew who was on the other side, even if he tried to will you away by purely praying to get himself out of this situation.
"Jihoon? I know you're in there," you called out from outside, "I saw Mingyu and Soonyoung leave work early today. I assume they came over to warn you I'd be coming."
Fuck, you were too smart.
There were too many good things about you. And Jihoon would've loved nothing more than to take a few hours to think about all those things, but he had your actual presence to deal with at that moment.
With a deep breath, he walked over to the door, opening it and finding you standing on the other side of it. You were still wearing your usual office ensemble, meaning you'd come directly from work.
"Jihoon," you breathed out. There was a mixture of relief and worry in your tone.
"Uhm, come in," he moved aside to allow you in.
Naturally, the two of you moved over to the couch, rushing to the kitchen really quick to get you a drink β one he, of course, knew by memory from the months in which he'd known you.
"So, uh, what's up?", he cleared his throat.
"Jihoon," you put down the coffee cup he'd handed you, shifting your body on the couch to face him, "I'm really sorry about last night," you began, "I promised I'd stay with you and then I left when I really should've said no to Doyle and all the girls."
He wasn't fully facing you, but he could still perceive how apologetic you were. It made him feel like an asshole to be the cause of this. Why did he have to be so damn sensitive?
"It's not your fault, it's-"
You went to grab his hand from his lap, mirroring that first time you'd followed him outside back when you'd barely started working with him. Physical touch always made him anxious, but it was a good type of anxiety when it came to you.
"No, Jihoon, it is," you reaffirmed, hesitating to continue.
A sort of shy look overtook your face, drawing your eyes away from him for the first time since your arrival. You even let go of his hand, acting as if you'd been shocked you even took it in the first place. A small 'sorry' left your lips before you continued speaking.
"And I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable last night with all my, uh, flirting," you swallowed, "I know you don't see me that way. I guess it was just the whole, uh, vibe? that made me feel like it was okay, but I won't do it again, I promise. I want to respect your boundaries. I didn't think you'd end up skipping out of work because of me. Fuck, I feel like a terrible friend."
Jihoon could do nothing but watch in horror as you spoke.
Every word that left your lips was more wrong than the previous. You'd misunderstood everything. But then again, Jihoon had not communicated his interest at all. You had no way of knowing that he liked you or that he'd been hoping against all hope that he hadn't misinterpreted your advances.
There was one last chance presenting itself in front of Jihoon. This was his last and only chance to set things straight. To grow some balls and risk it when he told you that he reciprocated any feelings you may have had for him β and tenfold.
But he stayed quiet, gulping when you sat there with an equally horrified look on your face. It was likely due to his silence, yet his body was still frozen.
"Uhm, Jihoon, I- I don't know what else to say. I'm sorry, I-"
"Will you go out with me?"
It had been said so suddenly that Jihoon didn't even register he'd been the one to say it. He hadn't planned to say that, especially so suddenly. It was as much a shock go him as it must've been to you. Surely his face matched yours, which consisted of wide eyes and an agape mouth. The shock was entirely mutual.
"What?"
Jihoon flushed, gulping and looking at his lap. His heart was practically beating out of his chest. This was the most daring thing he'd done in years, and its effects were manifesting physically. Sweaty palms, rumbling stomach, eyes burning, he had it all.
But at least it was out there now.
"I, uhm, I wanted to know if you'd want to go out with me?," he tried again, pathetically adding a quiet 'please' afterwards.
"Jihoon, what? You like me?"
The way you asked made it sound like it was the most shocking thing you'd heard in your life. That in itself made his eyebrows furrow in confusion.
He decided to start from the beginning. And this time he was the one to grab your hand.
"I was okay with everything you did or said last night. Trust me. I was just a coward. I was especially a coward when you asked me to dance. I wanted to say yes- I should've said yes. But instead, I let that idiot take you and- and when I saw you having fun, with- with him, I just left like an idiot. I'm sorry I left just like that. It wasn't you. It was me, I swear," he rambled on a single breath, "I do, uhm, I do like you. A lot. An embarrassing amount, really," he chuckled to himself, "And if you'd still be willing, I'd, uh, I'd really like to take you out on a date."
Eye contact had never been Jihoon's forte, and much less in an instance such as this. His eyes remained on his lap, altogether avoiding even daring look in your general direction. But eventually came the time in which he had to look your way to try and gauge your reaction.
Looking up at you, he believed to see horror in your eyes. The very last thing he could've ever wanted to provoke in you.
This was it. This was yet another rejection. Another humiliation leading up to social ruin. His one and only friend in his department would seize to want any sort of relationship with him and it was all because he misread a situation yet again and acted like a socially inept idiot.
"I, I'm sorry, I didn't-"
"I didn't know you liked me," you interrupted.
"Huh?"
"God, Jihoon, I had no idea you liked me back, what? This is crazy. I thought I fucked everything up," you let out a humorless chuckle.
"What?"
Now he was confused. Now he was the one with horror in his eyes.
'Back'?
"Sorry," you chuckled, scooting closer to him, "I like you. I assumed it was obvious and that you were just having a hard time letting me down easy," and with that, you blew his mind.
Jihoon sat there, mouth agape and eyebrows scrunched together in absolute shock. Things could not have turned more different than he'd ever imagined.
Yet he still felt like he was being played. Such things had happened in his past. Fake confessions, tricks of the mind, you name it. As much as Jihoon liked you, his past experiences screamed deep within him to back away, to not fall for it.
And then you grabbed his hand again, scooting even closer. There was a look of understanding in your eyes.
"I'm sorry," you began, "I'm not lying Jihoon, I really do like you."
Before he could ask what you meant, you continued.
"I, uhm, talked to Mingyu yesterday β I asked him not to mention it to you. He told me some stuff about your childhood," you paused, waiting for the solemn nod he gave you to continue. He tensed, leading you to squeeze his hand, "I know there's been some stuff in your past. We didn't get into details, but I promise I'm being genuine. I like you. And if you really do like me back, I'd love to go on that date with you."
Jihoon hadn't processed your proximity until this moment. He'd been too focused on the possibility of this being another ruse, another way to break him down just because of his social ineptitude. But now that his brain was working again, it immediately malfunctioned once more as he realized what was happening.
Not only had you admitted your own feelings and accepted his invitation, but you were far too close for anything other than a kiss to occur. If your proximity didn't give it away, your eyes did. Zeroed in on his lips, they occasionally made their way back to his eyes as if asking for silent permission.
And for once in his life, Jihoon was daring. Jihoon took the first step without fear of fucking things up.
As pathetic as it'd be to admit out loud, the very first touch of your lips was life-changing for Jihoon. There'd been one or two kisses in his life, all filled with instant embarrassment or simply being nothing to write home about.
Yet this kiss was devastating. It was a testament to everything he'd ever fantasized about yet convinced himself he'd never have. It was soft and barely there at first, but the quiet sound you let against his lips was all he needed to lose his mind.
Before he could pull away, shy, bashful, you pulled him back in, opening your lips and welcoming him to do the same.
Your tongues met in the middle before Jihoon completely surrendered to you. He didn't even try to put up a fight. It was unnecessary. All he wanted was your kiss, to fall victim to anything you wanted to take and give him.
A shaky breath was let out into your lips. It felt as if his body was vibrating. The immense nerves he usually felt in social situations and all their physical symptoms were present, but it was all too different than usual. They were accompanied by a burning in his stomach.
Jihoon knew this to be arousal. Frankly, it was a pathetic realization β to feel such things with a simple kiss. But it wasn't any kiss. It was you. It was your tongue in his mouth, your hands making their way to his hair, your soft sounds muffled with his own.
"N-no, not yet. Please," he found himself pleading when you pulled away to breathe.
And he almost cried when you moaned at his pleading before trapping him in another kiss, just as heavy as the last.
Jihoon was in over his head. He could barely follow along. Could barely please you with his own lips. He was defeated by you, too high on lust to be a worthy opponent. And god, he couldn't even let himself begin to think about what was going on in his pants at that moment.
"Jihoon," you breathed.
You'd learned your lesson from last time, it seemed. Instead of attempting to pull away, you licked at his lips, keeping a nonexistent distance between you.
"What do you want?", you asked, "What do you want from me? I'll give you anything you ask for."
His mind couldn't wrap itself around that statement. He wanted everything. His body was burning and his mind was reeling. Never in his life had he come close to feeling like this.
It had been many years since he'd settled for his life. No more hopes or dreams for love, for anything grander out of life. The concept of physical touch or any sort of pleasure had left the picture quickly into college. All he'd ever known had been senseless fantasies of what could be but would never be.
Yet now he sat here, prettiest girl he'd ever seen looking into his eyes β eyes heavy with lust that made him have to use all his strength to not cry and moan and whine at the effect he seemingly had on you. Did you like stupid losers with nothing to offer? Because he was the perfect candidate.
And his eyes dropped to your lips again, almost as if there was some sort of pull towards you that he could not control. Even while knowing all other forms of pleasure he could beg for, he needed to kiss you again.
"Nghn, I- Kiss, I wanna kiss you. Please? I wanna-"
His begging didn't last long, soon interrupted by something he could barely call a kiss. It was wet and messy, teeth clanking and tongues suckling at each other. Sounds of pleasure shamelessly left both your lips and your bodies got closer to one another.
The next thing to blow his mind was your body, which soon made its way to straddle his own. From this angle, you were slightly above him, now ensuring you had all the control β though that was met with no complaints from him.
His usually shy hands were forced onto your hips by your own before yours went back to running through his hair. They were liberal, your hands, in exploring him. When your lips trailed down to his neck, exploring and quickly finding his weakest spots, your hands went to his shirt, reaching under it and exploring the bare skin underneath.
"I want you, Jihoon. Do you want me too?," you whispered into his ear, teeth softly pulling at the lobe.
Jihoon couldn't think, couldn't breathe. His mind was a chorus of yesyesyes, too broken to actually respond.
"Want you, p-please. Anything ... You can do anything, just-"
Everything cut off then. Your touch, your lips on his skin, your weight on his lap.
But it was replaced by you pulling him towards the door leading into his bedroom, quickly assessing the room before pushing him onto the bed.
He was pliable under your touch. He'd be a boneless doll if necessary. Anything you wanted was yours β Jihoon was yours.
The empty weight of his lap only lasted a few seconds before you filled it back up, hands once again finding his shoulders. He felt shy under your gaze, especially knowing you could probably feel the hardness beneath you.
"I've never ... I know it's probably obvious, but I, uhm ..."
"That's okay, Jihoonie," your hand went to his cheek, soft in caressing it, "We don't have to do anyth-"
"No!", he suddenly interrupted. He became bashful when he realized how sudden and loud he'd been, "I mean, uhm, I want to. I really want to. Please."
You sighed, "So polite, Jihoonie. Bet you're going to be so good to me, aren't you?", you said almost to yourself.
Jihoon swore his dick twitched at your words. There was nothing in this world he wanted more than to be good for you. He needed you to tell him how nice and how good he was. Nothing would ever compare to being the giver of your pleasure.
He nodded numbly, mouth agape as you leaned down.
But instead of kissing him as he'd expected, the hand on his cheek shifted. Your thumb graced at his bottom lip as you watched intently. Jihoon's body reacted on its own. He needed no direction to open his mouth the tiny bit necessary to let your thumb in, suckling softly without needles any further direction from you.
This caused you to groan, which in turn made him moan. He'd never been one to have any sort of creative fantasies. Any time he allowed himself to think about sex, it was all pretty cut and dry, usually involving some faceless girl that he knew would never manifest herself into real life.
But now he had a girl β a girl he was completely infatuated by. And she had her thumb in his mouth, looking at him like he was the manifestation of her lust.
Jihoon didn't know what to do with you. You were too much for him to deal with, too much for him to function properly. He'd never imagined himself having to will himself into not cumming due to a pretty girl's thumb in his mouth, but in this moment there was nowhere else he would've preferred be.
And then you pulled your thumb away, earning yourself an embarrassing whine from him. He almost had it in him to complain, to whine and ask for you to give it back. He wanted to provide, to give you something back. But instead, you kissed him again, this time using your hands to unclothe him in the midst of the messy kiss.
Somehow he ended up shirtless, with his pants removed and sitting there with mere boxers while you sat atop him, still fully clothed. Yet he didn't have it in him to complain. If this day was full of you doing whatever you desired with his body, allowing him not a single touch of yours, he'd take it. He'd be willing to take anything you gave him. He'd beg if necessary.
"God, you're gorgeous. How do you not have a line waiting to get their turn with you?", there was a hint of frustration in your voice. It was as if the sight made you angry, like it made you so frustrated you couldn't hold back. Cuteness aggression but replaced with lust. Jihoon couldn't comprehend having such an effect on someone, much less you.
"I, uhm, I don't-"
He had no idea how to respond to your praise. But thankfully, you didn't give him enough time to muster out some pathetic response, instead opting to kiss him again, hands feeling up every available inch of skin.
You pushed him up on the bed, silently encouraging him to scoot up so he could lay down with your body still straddling his own. This felt more intimate. Jihoon knew where it was leading, he'd imagined being in this position once or twice, but never pictured it'd be anything like this.
"Is this okay?", you asked once your hands went to his chest, softly tracing shapes in it in a way Jihoon wasn't sure was supposed to be teasing or if he was just so touch-starved that it felt euphoric to him.
"Yeah, I, oh, fuck, yes, just ..."
He found his answer when your hands went to his nipples, circling them softly before pinching and pulling at them with your fingers, shutting him up before he could even make out a single sentence. It only became worse when you lowered your head, mouth meeting one nipple while the other remained engaged by your hand.
Sensitivity on his chest was not something he was aware of. There were likely countless things he was into but had never managed to explore. But Jihoon decided in that moment that what he was into was you. Every touch, every kiss, every look, every word. He held onto every single one and sighed into them, losing himself in the process and- fuck.
Fuckfuckfuckfuck.
Any further exploration of his mind halted at that moment. The moment in which your hips joined in on the fun. They ground against his own shyly at first, testing the waters. His hands gripped at your hips helplessly, almost as if attempting to hold onto his remaining sanity.
The worst part was when you reacted to it. Enjoying the feeling that first rock of your hips gave you, you continued, whining into his mouth as your hips sped up. Your hands gripped at his shoulders, though they occasionally felt up at his arms and chest, clawing at the muscle there and ensuring to leave your mark.
Jihoon was on fire. He couldn't think, couldn't breathe, couldn't speak. All he could do was pathetically whine into your lips, silently begging for you to never stop, for you to make him forget himself.
Fuck. Of course you liked him pathetic and whiny. Of course you were turned on by it. It created a never ending cycle of you doing whatever you wanted to him and him crying like a needy loser, only causing you to double down. It was heaven and hell. Jihoon's body was in overdrive.
"You're gonna make me cum, you- fuck, don't stop, I need- shit, please."
His voice was unrecognizable now. Jihoon didn't know which dimension he was in anymore.
Until it all halted.
Your movements ended, and the weight on his crotch left him. A pathetic whine came from his lips at this, but he was too needy to feel embarrassed.
Before he could get up and kneel, begging at your feet to continue (something which he'd truly do if he wasn't to embarrassed by the thought), you made your way back to him, though this time Jihoon felt an unexpected warmth on him. A warmth accompanied by sticky wetness. It took Jihoon a few seconds to realize what was sitting on him, but when it dawned on him, it destroyed him.
Daring to open his eyes and look up at you, he found you flushed. Your face looked warm and your expression was far too lustful for him to handle. What caught his attention the most, though, was your sudden nudity. His brain could not process it, the sight of you in complete nudity, sitting on his cock with a single layer of his damned boxers intervening.
The sight went beyond his imagination. Goosebumps formed on every inch of his skin, and even his hardness twitched under you in a manner so pathetic it shocked even himself. The image above him would haunt him for the rest of his life, especially as he laid there unknowing of what to do with himself, of how to respond to such a sight.
And then you responded for him.
You grasped his hands, taking them away from your hips and bringing them up to your chest. Naturally, they engulfed your breasts, a groan leaving his lips at their weight in his palms.
"Like this, baby. Just touch me however you want," you encouraged with a breathy sigh.
"You're so pretty, fuck," he groaned again.
It caused you to giggle, biting your lip when his hands began to fondle you, playing with your nipples in the way you'd played with his earlier.
Your hips began moving again, though this time it was hotter, more desperate. You became frustrated with the friction quickly enough, digging into his boxers and pulling him out. Jihoon cried out at this, eyes rolling back at your hold.
After a few experimental tugs at his dick, you let go, letting it fall back against his stomach and taking a seat on it. Not putting him in yet, you began sliding against the length of it, letting your warm wetness grind against it in a manner so filthy it had Jihoon's head throwing back into the mattress.
"God, I wanna fuck you so bad," you groaned, "You'll feel so good, I already know it."
It was like you wanted to kill him. But Jihoon knew it was the mindless lust speaking. Which only made it all the worse for him. His incidental effect on you drove him crazy.
"Please, I- I want it," he cried.
But you decided to kill him some more.
"How bad?", you whispered into his ear, movements not halting.
If you wanted him to beg, to become a pathetic whiny mess as he pleaded for a single touch, he would. He had no pride when it came to you.
"So bad, you ... you don't understand. I need it. I need to feel it so badly."
But god, you were so mean. So terribly mean and wicked to him. Simple begging would not do, Jihoon realized. You wanted more.
"Need to feel what?", your hips sped up, the friction half-killing Jihoon.
"Your ... your, fuck," he gulped, "Your pussy. Please."
You moaned and then giggled, separating your cunt from his dick in order to create some distance. Sneaking between your bodies, your hand grabbed onto his hardness, sitting yourself up on your knees so you could align him to your cunt.
His tip was at your cunt, forced to circle at it by your hand as you teased both yourself and him. The warmth begging to wrap around his head made him delirious. Nothing had ever felt as good. There was no comparable experience.
"N-no condom?", he willed himself to ask.
"I'm on birth control. So if it's okay with you ...", you trailed off, chuckling when he nodded desperately at you.
You continued to tease yourself with his dick, gasping at the feeling of his tip against your clit as he twitched in your hand. The teasing was killing him, though it was too pleasurable for him to beg for anything else.
"God, Jihoon, I can already tell you're gonna feel so good, baby," you practically whined, "I'm gonna fuck you so good, angel. Just you wait."
And then your welcomed him in. In a slow descent, you lowered yourself on him, crying out his name once he was finally bottomed out.
Under you, Jihoon lost his soul. It was too warm, too wet, too perfect for him to react. His brain clocked out for the day, leaving him a hollow body meant for nothing but receiving pleasure. That orgasmic feeling of, well, an orgasm, was approaching far too quickly. Jihoon could feel his body contract on itself, insisting at him to let go, to give himself up to you.
But he persisted. The sight above him β the pretty girl with her eyes rolled back and her arched back causing her to press up impossibly close against him β had his body begging for just a few more moments to enjoy the endless pleasure you were currently giving him.
"'m gonna move now, okay, baby? Feel so good already, shit. So full," you sighed.
Your hands settled on his chest, palms pressed against it as you began to bounce. Sometimes you'd bounce, sometimes you'd grind. It was all too deliriously good for Jihoon to realize the exact science behind it.
If everything that came before had led him to this moment, he'd happily go through it all again. Nothing in his life could compare to this, to the intimacy, the closeness he felt to you at this moment. He had to do nothing but cry tears of pleasure under you, taking every bounce, ever rock of your hips, every kiss and every word of praise in his direction. If he had to go back to the lonely, hellish life he lived before just in exchange for this very moment, he'd beg for the chance.
But Jihoon didn't need to be as fatalist anymore. Not when you kept whining his name, when your eyes were crossed and your breasts were bouncing above him in a demonstration of your incessant need for him.
"Baby, give ... give me your hand," you suddenly moaned. Your hips sped up, clearly driving yourself to your orgasm and surely dragging him along with you.
He followed your instruction, just as his brain had been programed. He gave you his hand, groaning when you placed it at your cunt, silently instructing for his knuckle to bend and dig at your clit. You tightened impossibly harder at that and fuck, it was too good. It was too tight, too wet, too filthy as your moans heightened in pitch.
And Jihoon truly wanted to warn you. He wanted to tell you and come right alongside you, but his poor virginal body could only take so much before breaking. It was an impossible task to hold back and await for your own pleasure to join his. But god was it mind-blowing.
He'd orgasmed before. Alone, cold in his room, feeling pathetic due to his lack of possibility at romance, knowing he'd never find a girl to look at him with anything but apathy. Yet here you were, whispering filthy words into his ear, encouraging his orgasm with a hint of mischief in your tone as your orgasm interrupted your words.
You were evil, Jihoon realized.
Above him, you made a show of your high, providing him with a view that would surely ruin him for life. Your hands let go of his body, instead choosing to fondle with your own, putting aside your own orgasmic experience to instead destroy any last bit of sanity left in him (which truly was not much β likely in the negatives by now). Your face was one that Jihoon would tattoo in his memory, bringing back up again and again in order to finish himself off in the many lonely nights to come β he couldn't help his fatalistic way of believing this might be a one and only type of situation.
It felt endless, so endless that the pleasure was almost painful. But Jihoon could still categorically asses this as one of the best experiences of his long years on this earth.
The low after the high was still blissful. Jihoon had heard of 'post-nut' clarity, with it being sold as a negative after such a high. Yet Jihoon felt nothing but bliss as you disconnected from him and dropped to lay at his side, wordless as you intertwined your bodies and stole body heat from him (which, really, he was more than happy to give).
Jihoon was unsure of what to say, but the smile you gave him said enough for the two of you. It was a silent exchange of affection that Jihoon never thought he'd be on the receiving end of.
"Maybe skipping work today was a good idea," you joked after some silence.
His eyebrows lifted. Understatement of the year.
You laughed and nuzzled further. He must've said it out loud. Well, the effect was nice, so he had no complaints.
"We're going to have to visit HR first thing tomorrow morning," you groaned into his chest, seemingly unable to help yourself in pressing kisses there. Jihoon felt too loved.
"Hmm?"
But he was still half-dead.
"I'll wanna jump you as soon as I see you tomorrow morning. I won't be able to be discreet," you joked.
"You wanna, uhm, be official?", he risked in asking.
He wanted to slap himself. You'd given no indication of changing your mind about him. This fatalism was something he really needed to work on.
"Yes, you idiot. God, Jihoon. We're going to have to work on this," you agreed without realizing.
It was quiet after that. It was the same quiet Jihoon had grown used to in his solitary life, except it had morphed into a silence he could see himself becoming fond of. Your breath against his chest was all he could hear, and it was the one and only sound he desired from now on.
The following morning, you awoke before him, loving on him without question, wordlessly showing him how easy it was for you to want him, to love him. It was new, but for once, it didn't scare Jihoon. For once, he could see himself giving into something good without fear.
to read short 2.3k word continuation (+ all other previously written bonus content) you can go join my svt monthly tier on patreon!
That was as far as Jihoon had been able to get all morning before yet another rude interruption from you.
Well, calling it rude would be going too far.
In reality, Jihoon was very welcoming of every single interruption. Especially since each one consisted of your lips on his, with the occasional involving your tongue down his throat.
You'd woken up early, awakening him with soft caresses and kisses to his bare chest. It was a first for him. Everything was a first, really.
He'd been defiled for the first time last night, having the girl of his dreams suddenly showing up to his apartment to fix up a miscommunication (entirely caused by him) and turning his world upside down by confessing to a crush he'd believed completely unlikely.
The details made Jihoon too flustered to really think about, but at least he'd allow himself to enjoy the aftermath of it all.
But sadly, he had to try and interrupt you again. It was nearing the time to go to work, and as happy as he was with you, he knew things at work would likely have to change due to the sudden development of your relationship.
...
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to all the boys i've loved before (maknae ver.) π a choose-your-own adventure.
one day, the letters you wrote for everyone you've ever loved go missing. said letters find themselves in the hands of the six boys you've wanted throughout different points in your life. now: who will you pick? -> see hyung ver. here!
βοΈ πππππππ, your summer camp crush.
βοΈ ππππππ, the guy on the bus.
βοΈ πππππππ, the bookstore cashier.
βοΈ ππππππ, the friend of a friend.
βοΈ ππππ, your auntie's son.
choose your adventure. π¬
seokmin, your summer camp crush.
mingyu, the guy on the bus.
minghao, the bookstore cashier.
seungkwan, weekend warrior.
vernon, the friend of a friend.
chan, your auntie's son.
Voting ended onFeb 7, 2025
π the winning member will have a special chapter release in time for valentine's. happy voting!
with love, kae β this was made possible with the input, hand-holding, and crush-trope suggestions of some amazing people: a, ally, bennie, eunha, kat, maple, nana, serena, tara, and tiya!
βΊ scroll through all my work ദΰ΅ΰ΄¦ΰ΄Ώ ΛΝΜκ³ΛΝΜ )β§ αΆ» π π° .α my masterlist | @xinganhao
