angel en la tierra

heya! im a writer by profession and i believe that my purpose in life is to noisily tap my keyboard or wait till my pen dries up..

[victoriaenjoyshardcore]

4 shades of blue captured in a single image in Antarctica

[masidhi]

Moon

She’s so pretty, isn’t she?

So bright and wonderful

So untouchable and free

She’s a beauty, isn’t she?

Always being admired

Always being gazed upon

She’s lonely, isn’t she?

So sad and alone

So silent as it shone

She’s a sight to see, isn’t she?

Always someone’s muse

Always up there, unable to refuse

[remanence-of-love]

[masidhi]

Ineffable

I am dreaming of a blanket full of stars

Of far-off places that haven’t been discovered

Of an abyss full of wonderful unknown

Will i be able to fly and touch the evening sky?

Able to sing of songs that haven’t even materialised?

Able to see prism of colors that are new to the eyes?

My thoughts go to worlds unconquered

To experiences no human has even imagined

To possibilities that no one has ever experienced

Will I see in real life all these colorful tapestries in my head?

All these wonders that no one has even said?

All these universes that I have gone to in the safety of my bed?

[dilfgifs]

BEN BARNES in The Punisher (2015-2018)

[masidhi]

❤️

[masidhi]

Sounds

I will never love you in silence

Because my devotion needs to be heard

I might whisper sweet nothings in your ears

But I will moan your name out loud in delicious surrender

I will speak to you in hushed tones at times

Because sometimes you need the serene calmness

I might communicate through touch and actions

But my affections ring through every vibration

I will never hold back on how much I care

Because I love you with all of me, raw and bare

I might be asleep and dreaming at this moment

But I assure you, even then, i do love you loudly

[masidhi]

Amour

I’m not the person who does half measures

I cannot love you at 50 percent

I cannot put bounds to the amount of care I have

I’m either a 0 or a 100 kind of girl

And sure that stresses me out sometimes

And sure that scares those undeserving of my love 

And sure that leaves me tired and vulnerable

But that makes me happy and that’s make life worth living for

I would rather give my all than be mediocre

I would rather express my love than keep it all to myself

I would rather love with all of me or not at all

Because loving someone to just some extent is not how i roll

Though sometimes I wonder if anyone can handle it

Though there are days I second guess 

Though i wonder if it’s really for the best

But that’s my love, whole, brimming, and full

[masidhi]

Eunoia

There’s something about the stillness of days

The quiet that envelops certain moments

The soft hum of the wind that goes unnoticed

The little sounds and rustling that isn’t always heard

I wonder how others starts their mornings

Is it when the sunlight softly kiss their faces?

Is it when the sound of traffic from the world outside rings?

Is it when the alarm buzzes steadily alerting them out of reverie?

It’s a mystery how an hour stretches sometimes

The way it just passes so fast when you’re busy

But drags on too long when you’re antsy

Only sixty minutes yet a billion of possibilities

I’m curious how people treasure their minutes

Do they watch every tick on their clocks?

Does it still count or it’s too insignificant to notice?

Or do they all cherish each trickle as much as I do?

[masidhi]

Mamihlapinatapai

my fingertips crave to trace patterns on your skin

my body wonders how it’s like to be close to yours

my breath hitches at the idea of your hands on me

my face wonders how it’s like to rest at the crook of your neck

my lips long to softly mesh with yours

my skin wonders how it feels to languidly glide against your body

my back dreams of resting peacefully against your chest as you hold me

my arms wonder how we will fit perfectly both lying down and standing up

my heart seeks to beat closely with yours

but most of all i wonder if you wonder about all of these things and more…

[masidhi]

Parallel Lines

No one really knows how we start

Or where we end really

But we keep going somewhere

We come across others in our journey

But barely having the chance to say hi

Sometimes I feel someone by my side

But never really being able to stay awhile

Maybe this is really how lines are made

But is this all we’re meant to be?

[masidhi]

Basorexia

What do I want?

The quiet mornings listening as the world wakes up

The sound of steady breathing before consciousness welcomes you back

The rustle of bedsheets as one moves closer to envelop another

The soft sigh that escapes because we’re exactly where we’re supposed to be

What made me smile?

The questions not everybody asked

The secret glances that was long forgotten

The sentiment that was never anticipated

The encounters that was planned and the ones not attended

What is this?

The right path after the crossroads

The ellipses after a satisfying birth of a brain child

The maturity that comes along with age

The cosmic joke fate always plays

[important-animal-images]

[masidhi]

otters make me happy <3

[masidhi]

What if I’m not a happy person?

Will you still hold my hand without a reason?

What if my smile falters once in a while?

Will you still stay and sit with me by the fire?

When my jokes become dry,

Will you still look into my eyes and ask why?

When my brows are furrowed,

Will you offer your shoulder for me to borrow?

Where will I hide so you won’t see my tears?

Will you look for me and drive away my fears?

Where should I go to find my spark when it dims?

Will you drive me to the lighthouse and watch with me as it beams?

How will you act when my days are bleak? 

Will you be mad and disappointed to know that sometimes I’m meek?

How will you deal with these parts of me that I hid?

Will you say it’s okay and know that a hug is all that I need?

-- The Saddest Girl Alive, 8.28.24

[masidhi]

Detach

I wonder if you forgot about me

If my taste on your lips no longer lingers

If my warmth no longer draws you near

I wonder if I’m still in your thoughts

The way I smile and look at you

The way I pronounce things that make you laugh

I wonder if your skin still craves for my touch

The way I hold your hands tightly

The way you cover me securely in your arms

I wonder if you still long to hear my voice

That soft whisper of I love you I didn’t plan to say

That I miss you I often say when you’re away

I wonder if I will still wonder as time passes by

If the days, weeks and months will make me forget

If tomorrow you will come back as if you never left…

[masidhi]

"Paint me with the greases on your hands... Mould me into the goddess you want me to be... Embrace me as if your life depended on it... Consume me as if I'm the most exquisite morsel you ever tasted... But most of all, love me as if I'm the only person who made you understand the meaning of the word..."

[cansu-m]

[masidhi]

Fin.

I'm not sad it ended, i'm mourning for the times I could have channeled all that love to myself.

After three years, I finally gambled again. I put myself out there and loved another person more than i should. I thought it will be good this time. it will be better. But I was wrong, dead wrong. I loved him thinking he was a good person, we wanted the same things, we shared values. The first month gave me a glimpse of the truth already but I choose to still stay thinking I can fix it, fix him even though every molecule in my body knows that is not possible nor it was my responsibility. Little by little I can feel my love for him shrinking in my chest. (funny that my background song right now is Exile, the universe really knows and gives us messages eh?) I was hopeful, I thought this is finally it, my happily ever after. So, yes, I'm mourning that. I'm not mourning the failure of the relationship because I'm thankful for that. I'm mourning the energy I spent loving another person unworthy of me. I'm mourning for the hope i nurtured in my heart that will not come into fruition. In a way, I blame myself for it when I know i shouldn't. That's what loving is right? No one knows the ending, but i feel like i should know better by now, the only consolation is I walked away earlier this time. I wasted a few months of my life but that's how it is. That's what gambling is like, still putting your heart on the line now knowing about the outcome. Right now, I just want to learn how to forgive myself and mourn for the lost time, the love and care I gave to yet another wrong person. He was a test and i failed again or maybe I didn't because I walked away earlier than the last, but still it was a time.