izzy's playlists!
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sheepfilms
wallacepolsom
tannertan36
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
PR's Tumblrdome
Today's Document
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NASA
d e v o n
Andulka
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Show & Tell
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Keni
Peter Solarz
Discoholic 🪩
#extradirty
YOU ARE THE REASON
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@mediayoutrusthandbook
Tuesday's Fact Free Conspiracy Theory (on a Wednesday)
All humans are born with the inherent ability to control the weather. This ability is completely lost the first time the baby cries. The doctors know this, which is why they always make the baby cry right away.
This is untrue and beyond ridiculous. Moreover, this has no logical headway into anything reasonable.
Nor is it true that anyone is trying to find a way to prevent a baby from ever crying.
Anyone want a job in daycare?
Tuesday's Fact-Free Conspiracy Theory
The real reason we have school is to mentally train us for work. The real reason we have work is to get us out of the house so the powers that be can sneak in and steal your food, mess up your settings, and take naps on your furniture.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Tuesday's Fact-Free Conspiracy Theory
The trees are watching you.
Not everyone.
You, in particular.
No, this one is actually true.
Tuesday's Fact Free Conspiracy Theory
There are in fact, not alligators in New York City sewers. They tried, but the Sewer Rat Kingdom extinguished them with prejudice.
If you don't believe that rats can take out alligators, well... I'll let you keep your naivety. For now.
This is quite a ridiculous idea. I don't know were such quirky and nonsesensical unthinking notions come from. Rats can't possibly take out an alligator.
Anyone have a cat?
Tuesday's Fact-Free Conspiracy Theory (Still technically on a Tuesday)
Like hangers, pens will multiply when you aren't looking and disappear when you need them. Unlike hangers, when pens multiply, the ink does not. Which is why when you finally find a pen... it doesn't work.
This is not true. Why think it is? Pens are not capable of dividing like that.
Tuesday's Fact Free Conspiracy Theory (once again, on a Wednesday)
Sorry about the delay. Yesterday was busy.
Conspiracy:
Bigfoot is real, another name for the Sasquatch family. Several prominent individuals have actually ended up in politics. Despite the claims from the Kelpie population, it has nothing to do with any desire for power or world dominance. It's simply a job that pays well for little work and no one knows who their representatives are anyway.
This is clearly false. The voting populace knows that a healthy government depends on the knowledge of the electorate. Therefore the vast majority remain informed about their government and...
We tried. Sorry.
Tuesday's Fact-Free Conspiracy Theory
In honor of the third time I've needed my new car battery jumped in a month, I present to you this:
There is a species of imps that live in glove compartments. When left alone, they get bored and entertain themselves my changing radio settings, adjusting seats and mirrors, draining the battery, and misfolding maps. They subsist on food left in cars and sometimes wrappers from food that you ate and left in the car.
There is no such creature that would live in a glove compartment. There is nothing strange happening.
Tuesday's Fact Free Conspiracy Theory
The reason schools and businesses close when there is snow is not because transportation is difficult or dangerous. It's because snow lulls the buildings to sleep and no one wants to wake them up.
They get… grumpy.
There is no truth in this rumor. Buildings are not capable of sleep. There is no truth to the rumor that we send teams to investigate these buildings or that these teams only have a seventy percent return rate.
P.S. If you wish a job with M.Y.T.H., section six is always hiring.
Tuesday's Fact Free Conspiracy Theory
Birds are, and have been for decades, trying to take over the world. They have fully mobilized and have only delayed because of lack of supplies. Squirrels keep eating their food.
The squirrels have no idea they are the saviors of humanity. They just like the taste of bird seed.
Birds are not interested in taking over the world in the slightest. That is utter rubbish.
Tuesday's Fact Free Conspiracy Theory
Clothes hangers have magical properties. They really do, and deep down, everyone knows it. They multiply when you aren't looking and disappear when you need them.
Hangers have no magical properties. Do not be fooled. Reason is your best tool.
M.Y.T.H.
Tuesday's Fact Free Conspiracy theory (Some week I'll stop doing these on Wednesdays)
Cars break down frequently (especially mine). The reason for this is not because you have a bad car, but because cars like the garage. Late at night, the cars at the garage do betting pools to see who can rack up the greatest debt for their owner without being replaced. (Mine managed to be put in the shop twice in a week, four times in six months. This is an actual fact.)
This is not true. Cars are great necessities that ocassionally require some general maintenance that may be inconvenient. When this happens, remember it it part of owning a car.
M.Y.T.H.
Tuesday's Fact Free Conspiracy Theory (on a Wednesday)
There are three main theories on why technology issues happen. Theory One: Computers are stupid.
Theory Two: Computers are smarter than we think they are and they hate us.
Theory Three: Gremlins.
Spoiler: It's definitely gremlins.
There are no such things as gremlins. Do not listen to such accounts. Gremlins are a fairy story. Computer issues happen rarely and always have normal sound reasonable answers.
M.Y.T.H.
Tuesday's Fact-Free Conspiracy Theory (On a Wednesday)
It occurs to me that no one knows where I am getting this information from and why it's a conspiracy. All information is stolen from the Media You Trust Handbook.
Today's tidbit:
Rabbits bite people not because they are scared or angry, but because they are part vampire and enjoy the taste of your blood.
This is false. There are no such thing as vampire bunnys. Do not believe it. There is no such thing as the Media You Trust Handbook.
M.Y.T.H.
