25. a simp for war criminals. kinda obsessed with COD currently. some (read: a lot) of my stuff is going to be inaccurate because explaining it all is tedious, sorry in advance. i tend to reuse names and scenarios multiple times because i'm not creative like that, so if it bothers you, sorry (but also feel free to drop ideas bc my brain is always fried). ("bowtruckleninja" is my main blog, so responses come from there)
A/N: Soooo, it’s been a while, hey? Instead of studying for my immunology exam, or even going to bed at a reasonable time, I wrote 1460 words of angst/hurt/comfort instead. Apologies in advance for any poor writing, I’m running on not enough sleep and not enough dopamine, hence this new piece after months of nothing. Spoilers for MW3 kind of. Let me know what you guys think!
It’s the middle of the night; she suddenly bolts upright in bed panting heavily, her hair wild from sleep as she gasps, trying to hold back tears. She clutches at her chest as she tries to catch her breath, disoriented to her surroundings. Simon is currently asleep beside her, but begins to stir when he feels her moving and hears her gasping. He cracks open his eyes, alerted to his love’s distress.
“Sweetheart? Are you alright?” He reaches up slowly as he sits up, trying not to startle her in her disoriented state. “What’s wrong?”
Still half asleep and half panicking, she turns to Simon and immediately starts conducting a trauma sweep, the muscle memory of her training kicking in as she checks him for injuries.
Simon doesn’t fight the inspection, letting her check him with the understanding that it might take a bit for her to snap out of her frantic nightmare-induced state. He gently brushes his fingers across her cheek, hoping that the gentle touch will pull her back to wakefulness and help her feel safe again.
“You’re okay, you’re safe here love. It’s just a nightmare.” He murmurs gently, cupping her face.
Although still frantically checking Simon for injuries as she presses on his collarbone followed by his facial bones, she slowly starts coming back to a more coherent state, her frantic search slowing down as she calms down.
With his other hand he gently reaches to rub up and down her back, looking at her with worried eyes. He takes one of her hands and places it on his chest, letting her feel his heartbeat.
“Slow down babe, you’re okay. You’re fine, I’m fine. You can calm down.” He says softly, sliding his fingers from her face into her hair.
He lets her get herself oriented, softly brushing her hair back as she rests her hand over his heart. “You’re okay, nothing’s wrong, I promise.”
“You’re alive.” She pants softly, the tears in her eyes threatening to spill.
“I’m safe, I promise.” He reassures her, rubbing her back in soothing motions. “It was just a nightmare, I’m right here.” He knows he needs to be gentle with her right now, she can be on edge for a while after a nightmare like this.
She relaxes onto her knees a little bit, leaning into Simon’s shoulder as he pulls her close. He wraps his arms around her, pulling her into his lap, holding her tightly to give her the comfort she needs. He can tell she’s still tense, so he encourages her to lean into him as he soothes her.
They sit there in charged silence, curled into each other as he gives her a few moments to gather her thoughts together.
“Makarov came after the 141 again.” She sobs softly, pressing her face into Simon’s neck.
Simon knows exactly why she’s been having recurring nightmares about Makarov, he’s been having similar ones alongside her. They almost seem to take turns having fitful nights of sleep, interrupted by each other’s nightmares.
He sighs, knowing there’s not much he can do at the moment except comfort her. “It’s okay, it’s over now. It was just a dream.” He turns his head to press a kiss to her forehead, hoping his touch soothes her frayed nerves.
He lets her melt into him, his arms around her tightly enough to keep her pressed to him, his heartbeat thudding in his chest as he recalls the events of a few months ago. They simultaneously feel as if they happened yesterday, just like they feel as if they happened a lifetime ago.
He shifts their bodies across the bed so that he can adjust them from sitting into laying down, encouraging her to rest her weary body on his. He keeps her curled onto him, running his hand up and down her back to try and comfort her.
After several moments of sniffling, she finally bursts into tears, breaking the silence in the room. “I’m scared….”
As soon as she starts crying, he knows she’s one step closer to getting it out of her system for the night. This is a recurring event, and he knows how to comfort her so that they can eventually both fall back asleep. He gently rubs the back of her head, encouraging her to let it out.
He holds her tight to his chest, knowing that all he can do right now is comfort her. It’s easy for him to do so, he knows her like no one else. He allows her to press herself into him and cry, letting out intense sobs as she processes the nightmare and the events that caused it.
After several minutes of intense crying, it seems she’s gotten through the worst of the breakdown. She continues crying, but a little less intense, eventually shifting to sniffles instead of sobs.
He kisses her forehead again as the tears start slowing down, his comforting touch doing its job of calming her down as she cries it out. “It’s okay love, it’s okay. You’re safe here with me.” He whispers soothingly.
“I miss Johnny.” She sniffles into Simon’s neck. “He’d laugh if he saw us like this.”
“He called it from the beginning, didn’t he?” Simon agrees softly, holding her a little tighter. He knows Johnny’s death had hit her extremely hard, the two of them having become fast friends upon the formation of the Task Force. “I miss him too. I just know he’d be teasing us about being right.”
“It was cruel of the universe to not let him see he was right.” She sniffles softly.
“I’m sure he knows love, I’m sure he knows.” Simon chuckles softly.
A few more moments pass before Simon nudges her with his shoulder. “Are you feeling a little better?” He asks gently as he swipes his thumbs across her cheekbones.
She nods, sniffling away a few remaining tears. “I was just thinking.”
“About?” He inquires hesitantly.
“The first time you kissed me.” She mumbles.
Simon recalls the incident in question. It had been her birthday, just before midnight to the next day. They had gone out for a quiet dinner to celebrate, neither of them being in a particular mood to do so, but using it as a reason to get off base.
On the walk up to her door, Simon had finally gathered up the courage to kiss her, but she had started crying after he did so.
“I’d be lying if I said I didn’t remember the moment. It was certainly… unique. Had I’d known you’d cry, I might have held off.” He says softly still inwardly cringing at the idea that he’d made her cry. “You never did explain why you cried…”
After the tears started, she had bid a hasty goodnight and shut the door in Simon’s face rather abruptly. Things had been a little awkward afterwards, but upon her insistence, Simon eventually accepted that it wasn’t necessarily his fault she’d shed tears.
“It’s kind of silly now, in retrospect.” She mumbles into Simon’s shoulder. “Before… Makarov… There was one night Johnny and I had gotten a little drunk, and he’d bet me that you’d wait until something like my birthday to kiss me.” She sniffles, trying to clear her nose. “When you kissed me, I remembered that bet and the memory kind of startled me, because it felt like Johnny was shouting ‘I told you so!’ from the afterlife or something. So I guess I owe him a drink the next time I see him.”
Simon chuckles slightly at the explanation, relieved that her tears hadn’t been exactly his fault. “He was right on target with that one. I didn’t think I’d have the guts to do it, but I’m glad I did.”
They lapse into a comfortable silence, the warmth of the bed helping them both feel a little more relaxed after tonight’s ordeal.
She yawns, the adrenaline from the nightmare finally starting to wear off. “Sorry for manhandling you earlier.”
“It’s alright, it was just a nightmare, it can be incredibly disorienting sometimes. I’m just glad you’re feeling a little better.” He smooths his hand across her hair before pulling the blankets back around them.
She takes a deep breath, letting the warmth of Simon’s embrace comfort her. He tucks the blankets around them, settling into the bed as they get sleepy again. He continues rubbing his hand up and down her back a little longer as she drifts off to sleep, feeling at ease that he’s there to comfort her.
He presses one last kiss to her head before drifting off to sleep himself, comforted by the fact that his lover is safe in his arms.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are always appreciated! (Requests are also still open)
even in a different life, you still would have been mine
A/N: Here's a stray kitten fic! I hope it's to your liking @v1naco <3
It’s a quiet Sunday afternoon on base, and Artemis is out for a walk when she hears a faint meowing sound come from the corner of one of the buildings. She stops, trying to pinpoint where the sound is coming from.
As she waits, she hears another pitiful crying meow sound, and Artemis realizes it’s coming from one of the gutter drains.
She carefully approaches, crouching down next to the exit of the gutter, and spots a little black furball in the drain.
“Hey little buddy. Guess the cat distribution system chose me today, huh?” Artemis whispers to the little kitten, hoping she doesn’t startle it.
“Pspspsps” Artemis whispers to the kitten, trying to see if she can coax it out. The kitten doesn’t move, only meows and cries pitifully as he stares at Artemis.
“Aww, are you stuck little buddy?” Artemis asks softly. “Let’s see if we can get you out, okay?”
She carefully reaches her hand into the drain and gently grips the kitten by the scruff of its neck, and pulls it out. The kitten gives another pitiful meow, but doesn’t scratch or bite Artemis as she pulls him out.
She looks the kitten over, and realizes that he’s got something stuck in his paw. “Aww buddy, is that why you couldn’t leave the drain? Where’s your momma?”
Artemis spends a few minutes looking around, trying to see if she can spot any other cats, but she doesn’t see any.
“Okay little buddy. Let’s get you inside, cleaned up and fed, and then we’ll see what happens, okay?” She says to the kitten.
She tucks the kitten into the pocket of her hoodie, hoping that she can subtly make it to the kitchen without anyone noticing.
She’s halfway down the hallway to the kitchen when Simon sees her from the corner of his eye. He’s in the rec room watching a movie with a few other people, but he seems to always be aware of Artemis’ presence.
He sees her sneaking down the hallway, and he leaves the rec room to follow her and see what she’s up to.
“Artemis, what are you doing?” He asks her.
Artemis freezes in her tracks, but doesn’t turn around.
“Artemis, you’re trying to sneak more snacks, aren’t you?” Simon sighs slightly.
“No…” She says suspiciously, not fully turning around.
“Then what are you doing?” He asks.
“Nothing…” She says hesitantly, guarding the pocket of her hoodie.
Artemis and Simon stand in the hallway staring at each other in awkward silence, while Artemis tries to come up with an excuse for her suspicious behavior.
The silence is interrupted by a small ‘mrow?’ coming from the pocket of her hoodie.
Simon sighs and rolls his eyes at the sound. “Did you seriously bring a cat onto the base and into the building? Temi, you know that’s not allowed.”
Artemis flushes bright red. “I didn’t bring the cat. I found it.” She says as she places her hands protectively around her pocket.
“Artemis, we have these rules for a reason. The cat isn’t allowed in here. It might make a mess or something.” Simon sighs. “Go put the cat back outside please.”
She shakes her head. “I think he’s injured, I was just going to feed him and clean him up before calling someone about it.”
Simon pauses, having a better understanding of where Artemis was going with this. “Alright, show me that cat. We’ll see what we can do about it.”
Artemis lifts the bottom of her hoodie up and opens the pocket, revealing to Simon a tiny black kitten with wide greenish eyes. “Look at him, he’s so cute.”
Simon, unable to resist the cuteness of the kitten, relents and coos softly at the kitten. “Yeah, he’s cute. If he’s injured then I guess he can’t go back outside on his own.”
“He’s got something in his paw,” Artemis says softly as she cradles the kitten in her hoodie. “He was crying when I found him.”
“Alright, let me get a look.” Simon extends his hand for the kitten.
Artemis carefully pulls the kitten from her pocket, who lets out a meow of protest before she places him in Simon’s outstretched hand. “Just be careful, he’s scared.”
Simon gently holds the kitten, looking the creature over, taking care not to scare or hurt him. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.” He inspects the paw Artemis mentioned, carefully turning it over. “It looks like a piece of glass. It’s small, but that doesn’t make it any less dangerous for the poor guy.”
“I was going to take care of its paw myself, but it might be easier with another set of hands.” She says to Simon, as she softly pets the kitten.
Artemis and Simon make their way to the kitchen where Artemis flicks the overhead light on so that they can see the kitten better.
She pulls a pair of tweezers from a pouch on her cargo pants and hands them to Simon.
He carefully uses the tweezers to pull out the glass embedded in the kitten’s paw. With only a small drop of blood and a small meow from the cat, the glass was out. “There we go little guy, it’s gone.” He says softly, handing the kitten back to Artemis.
“Alright little buddy, I’m gonna wash you now.” Artemis says to the kitten as she runs warm water in the sink. She carefully places the kitten in the bottom and starts bathing the kitten to clean it of any dirt or other things it might have on it.
After she finishes bathing the kitten, Simon wraps it in a dish towel and starts drying it off. The kitten meows again, seeming much calmer. As Simon dries the kitten, it starts meowing more, almost sounding like it’s purring.
Simon smiles, wrinkling his mask, as he starts to pet the cat. “What are we going to name him?”
“Hmm, I don’t know,” Artemis starts thoughtfully. “He seemed to really like hiding in the dark pocket of my hoodie.” She pets the kitten as Simon cradles it in his hands. “And he was hiding in the shadows, I almost missed the little guy when I was looking for him.”
Simon softly rubs his thumbs along the kitten’s fur as they think about a name.
Artemis laughs softly, “He just appeared out of nowhere, kind of like you do sometimes. Like a phantom.”
Simon looks at Artemis with a twinkle in his eyes. “Maybe we should name him Phantom then.”
Artemis lifts the kitten, smiling at him. “What do you think, little buddy? Should we name you Phantom?”
The car purrs, seeming to like the name it’s been given.
“It’s settled then.” Simon smiles, “Welcome to Task Force 141, Phantom.”
Artemis hands the kitten back to Simon and laughs, smiling softly at the pair, “Ghost and Phantom.”
“It’s got a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?” Simon laughs, then sighs. “We’ll have to talk to Captain Price, and Supply about this. I’m sure they’ll be thrilled about this.”
“Maybe…maybe if we train him to catch mice around the base, they’ll let us keep him?” Artemis says, looking hopeful.
“Well…” Simon pauses, taking a moment to think. “It might be possible, but it’s a bit of a long shot. We’ll see what happens.”
“We’ll see…” Artemis agrees, petting Phantom softly. “We’re gonna take good care of you for as long as we’re allowed to have you buddy.”
Simon looks down at the cat, giving it a soft pet on the head. “You seem pretty attached to the kitten…”
“He’s so little, and he was all alone.” Artemis explains, softly petting the kitten. “I couldn’t find his momma or anything, and I couldn’t leave an innocent kitten out there, especially since he was injured.”
“That was really noble of you, and incredibly sweet.” Simon smiles at Artemis.
“Maybe it’s the medic in me.” She says as she softly pets Phantom. “Maybe I just need to make sure that everyone’s okay.”
“It sounds like the medic in you runs pretty deep.” Simon whispers as he brushes a hand down Artemis’ cheek. “You’re a good person. Maybe too good of a person for this place.”
She shakes her head, a smile on her face. “I’m not ‘too good’ for this place. Someone has to make sure you all come home alive.”
“You might be right.” He says as he pets Phantom again. “Still, make sure you don’t let people take too much from you. They’ll take twice as much as you’re willing to give them, and they won’t think twice about it.”
“I know, but that’s why I have you.” Artemis looks at Simon, smiling at how he pets Phantom.
Simon is about to say something else when he gets interrupted by a small “mrow?” from Phantom.
“He’s probably hungry.” Simon chuckles, laughing at how cute Phantom’s little meows are.
“Probably. I think there’s some canned tuna in here.” Artemis says as she reaches into one of the cabinets and pulls out a can. She opens the can and places some of the tuna on a plate. “Alright Phantom, here’s some food for ya.”
Phantom sniffs the tuna hesitantly, but then immediately starts eating, appearing to be excited by the food.
Artemis washes her hands and then stands next to Simon, leaning her head on his shoulder as they watch the kitten eat the tuna.
“Well isn’t that adorable.” Simon whispers to Artemis, wrapping an arm around her waist.
“I hope we can keep him.” She says softly.
“Me too… Although we’ll have to convince Price that keeping the cat is worth the time and effort, and that it’ll add value in having him.” Simon says as he nuzzles his nose into Artemis’ hair. “Maybe the little guy could be a mascot.”
“Hey, pets can be good for morale. Maybe a base cat would be helpful.” Artemis whispers to Simon. “And look at him! He’s so cute! Who could say no to that little face?”
Simon chuckles at Artemis’ enthusiasm for the cat. “When you put it like that, it’s really hard to imagine someone saying no. He’s damn cute, that’s for sure.”
When Phantom is finished eating, Simon picks him up, petting him softly. He then hands the kitten to Artemis and washes the plate. “Alright little guy, let’s go talk to Captain Price.”
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated! Requests are also open!
A/N: Sorry for being MIA lately y’all. Life has been a rollercoaster these past few weeks. In honor of me failing my final exam and getting broken up with last night, here’s a little bit of comfort from our favorite skull-faced boy.
This piece is geared more towards f!reader with ADHD, since I’ve been having a really rough time lately, it’s an excerpt from a longer self-indulgent piece I’m working on.
x
He leans down to press a soft kiss to her lips. He wraps his arms around her body, pulling her close to him as they kiss. He was so happy that she was getting back to her old self, the one that was vibrant and full of life, not dull and suppressed. The kiss, mixed with smiles and soft whispers of contentment, had his heart bursting with joy at the thought of having her back to her happy self.
As the kiss continued, he could feel her wet tears on his face. He paused the kiss and pulled back slightly so he could look at her. He felt her tears on his face, and he knew what they meant. It was as if his sweetheart was finally becoming free from all the isolation and depression she had been experiencing. She was beginning to feel free, and it made him feel relieved to know she would be okay.
“My love…”
He gently wiped away the tears from her eyes and kissed her again, more lovingly than before. He wanted to shower her with his love.
“I’m sorry.” She sniffles slightly, as she smiles through her tears. “It’s just, for the longest time I believed I was too hard to love because of my ADHD.”
His eyes widened as he heard her words. She felt like she was too hard to love because of her ADHD? He couldn’t stand that idea, and he had to reassure his love that he felt differently than what she had been led to believe for so long, different from what she had always thought.
“My sweet girl, you’re wrong. I love your talkative and energetic self. I love your laugh. Everything about you is perfect the way it is. I don’t love you any less because of your ADHD.”
He pauses to press a kiss to her forehead.
“My beautiful sweet girl, I’m sorry that others have made you think this way for the longest time. I don’t see your ADHD as an issue to ‘deal with’ when I’m with you. I see you, my love. There is no need for you to ever doubt that you are worthy of love, or reason to believe that you are difficult to love.”
He was going to try his hardest to make her believe that she was loved, regardless of what others may tell her. He wanted her to know that she shouldn’t have to be ashamed of her ADHD, that she could be comfortable in her neurodivergency.
“Sweetheart, you have nothing to be ashamed of. I love all of you, including your ADHD, not despite it. I don’t want you to ever think that there’s something wrong with you, or that you have to hide your personality to try to tone it down for other people. My love, you are a wonderful person. Sure, sometimes you might need to work a little harder at things, but you are amazing. The limitations that the world tries to place on you because of your ADHD don’t define you. You define you, and the definition I see when I look at you is a beautiful one.”
He presses a kiss to her cheek before he lovingly whispers to her.
“I love you.”
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated! (Requests are currently open!)
On a quiet Wednesday morning at 3 AM, Simon and Artemis were enjoying a peaceful night’s rest, in preparation for a relaxing two days off for the both of them. Schedules had aligned perfectly across all fronts, and both were excited to spend the next couple of days just relaxing, before jumping back into their hectic work lives.
Unfortunately, life doesn’t always go as planned, and Artemis’ phone rings, interrupting their peaceful sleep.
“Hello?” Artemis whispers groggily into the phone, as she sits up.
Simon was woken up by Artemis’ phone ringing, and rubbed his eyes as he sat up slightly in the bed.
“Are you serious!?” She whispered into the phone.
“Who’s calling?” Simon asked softly, a hint of raspiness in his voice from sleep.
“It’s the hospital.” Artemis turns to Simon, whispering. “Apparently too many people called in sick, they want to know if I’d be willing to come in today…”
Simon rubbed his eyes again, feeling himself wake up a little bit more. He turned more towards Artemis, looking her up and down. “....are you going to go?” He asked, sitting up fully in the bed.
He wanted to respect whatever decision she made, so he didn’t say anything about what he wanted.
“I… I don’t want to…” She admits. “It’s already been a long week, and I’ve been looking forward to spending time with you.” She says softly.
Simon smiled when she said she’s been looking forward to spending time with him. “Then don’t go, and we can spend today and tomorrow together.” He suggests quietly, tracing tiny circles into her back with his fingers. “You’re not obligated to go, and it’s kind of late for them to be calling you anyway.” He added, kissing the top of her head softly.
“I just… I feel bad leaving them understaffed…” She sighs, but then sits up straighter when an idea pops into her head. “But that’s what float pool is for…”
She turns to Simon with a slightly mischievous look on her face. “Tell me you need me at home today…”
Simon chuckles as he sees the gears turn in Artemis’ head. He reached up, gently placing a hand under her chin. “I need you at home today.” He smiled softly, his voice low and a loving look in his eyes.
Artemis smiled at him before turning back to the phone. “I’m sorry, but my partner needs me at home today, I can’t come in.”
Simon smiled as she spoke with the charge nurse, leaning closely to press a kiss to her hair. “Good girl.” He whispered quietly, a proud look on his face. He liked the idea of her saying that she couldn’t go because he needed her at home.
“Alright… okay… good luck… m’bye…” Artemis said as she finished, hanging up the phone call.
“M’kay, now let’s get back to sleeping…” Simon said, as he playfully dragged Artemis into laying down again, wrapping his arms tightly around her and nuzzling into her neck.
He always enjoyed cuddling with her, it was very relaxing.
“Yes, please.” She yawned as she snuggled into him.
Simon smiled softly, he loved that they were so comfortable with each other, and that they were able to cuddle so closely together. He pressed a kiss under her ear as he held her close.
“I’m so lucky to have you.” He whispered, holding her tight as they both fell back asleep.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
A/N: content warning for a scorpion in the shower (definitely not writing from experience...)
A calm Tuesday evening on base, and Simon is on his way back to his barracks room when he hears a high pitched shriek followed by a loud “HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” coming from the women’s shower block.
“What the hell…?” Simon wonders as he changes course for the shower block, to investigate what’s so unholy.
As he approaches, Simon sees his girlfriend stumble out of the shower block, wrapped in only a towel, absolutely soaking wet.
“Jesus Christ, Hail Mary, Mercy Me.” She says under her breath as she shudders.
Simon’s eyes widen when he sees her. “Hey, are you okay? Did something hurt you?” He asks, concern evident in his eyes. “You’re dripping wet; do you want to go back inside and get changed?”
“Oh hell nah, not with that devil spawn in there.” She says, shaking her head.
“Devil… spawn?” His eyebrows furrow under the mask in confusion. “What are you talking about?”
“There’s a big ass scorpion in the showers. Ain’t no way in hell I’m going back in there.” She shudders again.
“A scorpion…?” Simon slowly approaches the door to the shower block and takes a look inside. His eyes widen as he takes a step back. “Jesus Christ…”
“See? Big ass devil spawn.” She shakes her head. “I usually have no problem with scorpions, but not when I’m naked, just trying to take a shower. No way.”
“Hell no, that’s awful…” He glances back at her. “How did it even get in there?”
“I don’t know. Poor bastard’s probably freaking out as much as I am though. But it’s either him or me in there, and right now I’m not wearing enough clothes to deal with it…”
He runs a hand down his masked face. “Damn… do you want me to take care of it? I’m still dressed and everything. I got this…” He pauses for a moment. “How big is it though?”
“Big, like the size of your palm maybe. Which means it isn’t all that venomous, but it still doesn’t mean I want to risk getting stung by it.” She says.
“Your palm, or my palm?” He asks, teasingly, lifting an eyebrow under the mask.
“Your palm. Like I said, big ass scorpion.” She responds.
“Alright, I’ll handle it.” He says with a slight smirk on his face.
He takes a deep breath before entering the shower block. He’s a little hesitant, but keeps a keen eye out for the “devil spawn” of a scorpion.
He sees it hiding in the corner. And… she wasn’t exaggerating. It’s a pretty big scorpion, just chilling in the corner.
His eyes widen as he takes in the size of the arachnid. He lets out a swear under his breath as he grabs a towel from off the floor, slowly approaching the scorpion. He then drops the towel on top of it, scooping it up, holding it together tightly to avoid being stung.
Simon walks back outside, goes several steps behind the building, and flings the towel to launch the scorpion far away.
“That… that’ll work.” He says hesitantly as he watches the scorpion fly through the air and land a solid distance away.
“Well, that was kind of terrifying.” He says to her as he comes back around the building. “You really weren’t kidding about the size.”
“I don’t usually scream for bugs, but….” She trails off, shaking her head.
“Yeah, it would be one thing if you were wearing clothes, but…. Just bare naked and this massive scorpion just… pops up?”
“Devil spawn.” She mutters under her breath. “Thank you for taking care of it, Simon.”
The corner of his mouth twitches up into a half-smile. “No problem. Glad to be of assistance.”
He gestures to her form clad in the wet towel. “Are you… comfortable enough to go back in and finish showering?”
“Yeah, I’m good now.” She says, leaning up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to Simon’s jaw. “I’ll find you later?”
“Of course, you know where to find me.” Simon turns his head slightly so he can press a masked kiss to her forehead.
He brushes a hand down her cheek before stepping back and making sure she gets back to the shower okay, giving her a gentle wave as he turns to walk away.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
“Have I… done something to annoy you?” She asks hesitantly.
“What? No, you haven’t annoyed me. Where did you get that idea?” He asks, turning to face her.
“You’ve just been… really distant lately. And a lot quieter than usual… You don’t really laugh at my jokes anymore…” She says softly.
“It’s nothing, love. I’ve just been tired and stressed.” He says, sighing as he crosses his arms, staring out the window, watching the rain fall outside.
“Is there anything I can do to help?” She asks.
He looks at her for a moment, before looking down at the ground, speaking in a small voice uncharacteristic for him. “A hug…?” He says awkwardly, almost as if he’s embarrassed to ask.
“I can do that.” She smiles as she steps forward and wraps her arms around him tightly.
“Thank you.” He rasps, trying to keep his voice from breaking. “You really are the sweetest.” He says, gently placing a hand on the back of her head as he wraps his other arm around her back. He squeezed her softly, letting the hug linger long enough for them to comfort each other.
She holds him tightly, pressing herself against him in an attempt to show how much she cares.
“You have no idea how much I needed this.” He says softly. “No idea how much I appreciate this right now.” He mutters, pulling her closer to him, resting his cheek on her head, inhaling the soft scent of her hair. “Thank you.”
“I will hold you for as long as it takes for you to feel okay.” She whispers softly.
They stand still for several moments, just enjoying each other’s comfort.
He closes his eyes, enjoying the warmth of holding her, letting out a deep breath as he starts to relax in her embrace.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
After an intense 24 hour long mission for Task Force 141, and another chaotic 12 hours for Jaguar, who had bandaged and stitched everyone up while they waited for exfil, the team was finally loading up on transport to make their way back to base.
Despite fighting the exhaustion and trying so hard to stay awake, Jaguar was quietly nodding off in her seat as the transport rocked them back and forth while driving.
Ghost sat next to her and watched silently as she nodded off, waiting to see if she would fall asleep. His usually cold gaze had a sense of warmth in it, his eyes softening slightly as he watched her.
He continued to watch her head bob slightly as she fought the feelings of sleepiness that were hitting her.
“Hey, Artemis.” He called quietly, unsure if she’d hear him or not.
“Hmm?” Her head snapped up at the sound of her name, eyes trying to blink the exhaustion away.
“How are you feeling?” He asked, his eyebrows raised under his mask, a faint note of concern in his eyes. She had been pushing hard for about 36 hours, and it made sense that she was as tired as she was.
“I’m fine, how are you?” She asked, looking up and down as if checking Simon for injuries.
“I’m well, thank you.” He gave her a soft smile beneath the mask. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m…” She interrupts herself with a yawn. “I’m good, just ready to get home.”
He notices her yawn and gently pats her knee, a hint of humor and affection in his eyes. “Want me to wake you when we get back to base?”
A faint blush tints Artemis’ face at having been caught falling asleep. “That would be great, thank you.”
“No worries.” Simon smiled softly. “I’ll wake you when we get there.”
At his reassurance, she tentatively leaned her head on his shoulder, and he shifted down a bit to try to make it more comfortable for her.
Artemis fell asleep, exhaustion overtaking her body as she basked in the warmth of Simon’s presence next to her.
Simon waited until they were the last ones on the transport before waking Artemis.
“We’re here… Time to wake up cutie.” He said, nudging her softly.
She smiles at the pet name, gently rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. “Thanks, love.”
“Anytime, beautiful.” He smiles softly, a slight wrinkle appearing on his mask. He reaches up with one hand to gently caress her cheek before getting out and helping Artemis step down from the transport.
“Let’s go get some rest.”
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
It’s usually pretty quiet at 02:30 AM on the base.
Unless your name is Simon Riley, and you have a penchant for taking peaceful walks when a strong bout of insomnia kicks in, preventing you from getting a restful night's sleep.
Desiring a warm cup of tea before heading back to bed to try to catch a few hours of sleep before being forced to start the day, Simon heads to the communal kitchen, and notices the light is turned on as he approaches.
When he enters the kitchen, trying to suppress a yawn, the sight of Artemis sitting on top of the fridge causes a smile to crack across his masked face.
“What in the world are you doing up there?” He asks, a faint laugh lining his voice.
He’s almost too tired to care, but even the sight of Artemis on the fridge is strange enough to make Simon do a double take.
Artemis’ eyes widen at the realization of being caught, but she regains her composure quickly. “Umm… eating a snack?”
Simon rubs his eyes and gives a slight chuckle. “You know what I mean. Why are you on top of the freakin’ fridge at 2 AM?”
He’s genuinely amused, but tries to hide it behind the mask.
“It’s nice up here. I feel tall.” She responds.
“Oh yeah? Never would’ve thought to climb up there.” He says, a slight smirk across his face. “How’d you even get the idea to get up there?”
“I was grabbing a snack, and my brain said, ‘what if you sit on top of the refrigerator?’ So I did.” She explains simply.
Simon lets out a soft chuckle. “Your brain sounds very intriguing.” He says, walking over to the fridge and getting out a snack. “What’re you eating?”
“Dried blueberries, you want some?” Artemis extends an arm, reaching the bag in her hand for Simon to reach.
“Sure.” Simon replies, taking a small handful of the blueberries from the outstretched bag.
He lifts his mask and pops a few in his mouth. “You might be onto something here, these are pretty good. I might have to get a bag for myself next time I go to the store.”
“Do it.” She nods. “They’re so tasty.”
They both munch in silence for a moment, before Simon looks back up at Artemis, nodding at her position. “So do you get up on the fridge often when you’re snacking? Or was this just a one-time ‘I wonder if I fit up there’ type of thing?”
“First time actually, but it’s fine. Although… I didn’t fully think through the ‘getting down’ part.” She says.
“So you’re stuck, is what you’re saying.” Simon turns his head, trying to hide a laugh. “Do you want help getting down?” He asks, turning back, losing the battle of containing his laughter. “Or were you planning on living up there from now on?”
“I’m not stuck.” Artemis says indignantly, trying not to smile.
Simon raises an eyebrow, wrinkling his mask slightly. He’s not sure he believes her, otherwise she might have already climbed down. He’s not going to force her to come down, but he is curious to see if she can do it on her own or not.
“And you’re that confident about that? What’s your plan for getting down?” He asks, tilting his head in amusement.
“Well… you remember how I’m afraid of heights?” She starts slowly.
Simon briefly glances down at the floor in front of the refrigerator, and sighs, mildly disappointed in Artemis’ decisions.
He did remember that Artemis had mentioned she was afraid of heights, but it hadn’t occurred to him that it would play a factor in her current predicament. “You’re afraid of heights, and yet you climbed on top of the fridge? Did you plan for getting down at all, or not?”
“I had no issue climbing up here, but when I realized I can’t really get down the same way I came up, my brain started trying to convince me that something’s going to go wrong when I try to get down…” She explains.
Simon looks back down again, then up at Artemis. He wants to help her down, but he doesn’t want to force her into anything. Even if it’s slightly amusing to his inner chaotic self, he doesn’t want her to be stuck up there for the rest of the night.
“You know,” He starts, a smirk across his face, “You’re not wrong. Something could go wrong if you just jump off the top of the fridge.”
“I wasn’t going to jump off, I’m not stupid.” Artemis huffs.
Simon shakes his head, letting out a small laugh. “How were you planning on getting down then?”
“Using the cabinets to climb down…” She says, a faint blush tinting her cheeks.
Simon looks over at the cabinets, and the back at Artemis, raising an eyebrow. The question he’s about to ask has an obvious answer, but he wants to hear her say it first. “And how stable do you think those cabinets are?”
“...That’s… That’s why I’m still up here…” Artemis says hesitantly.
He pauses for a moment to consider her answer. “Alright, you’ve got two choices, you either take your chances with the cabinets and climb down like you planned. Or…” He takes a breath. “...I’ve got a better idea. Do you trust me to help you get down?”
“Yes, I trust you.” She nods.
Artemis puts her legs down on the front of the refrigerator, scooting forward as Simon reaches up to steady her. She places her hands on his shoulders as he firmly grasps her waist to lift her up and off the fridge.
Simon is a tall man, and he has no issue reaching up to grab Artemis and bring her down to the floor. He firmly holds her as he sets her down gently on the ground, waiting until her feet are steady to let go.
“And, you’re down. Nice and safe.” Simon nods when he lets go of Artemis.
“I hope your brain doesn’t convince you to do anything else dumb tonight, Artemis.” He says in a playful tone. “No more adventures on the fridge, yeah?”
“Hey, sometimes the impulsive thoughts win. But, thank you for helping me down.” Artemis says, a small smile on her face.
“Sometimes they do.” Simon nods. “I just don’t wanna see you get hurt, but, I suppose I can’t stop you from being reckless sometimes, either. Just, be careful, yeah?”
“I’ll try.” Artemis says softly. “Thank you, Simon.”
“Any time, Artemis.” Simon says gently. “Any time.”
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
got used to the feeling of letting it go, so give me something to believe in (deep end, part 3)
A/N: continued content warning for suicidal ideation, domestic violence, and excessive alcohol consumption.
“Damn it…” Simon stared at the apartment door, his mind flooded with circling thoughts. “What do I do now?”
How can he get her to stop? Can he even do anything? Is he making things worse by trying? He felt a knot form in his throat, making it difficult to swallow.
As he stood there, he heard a yell come through the door followed by the sound of glass smashing.
“Aaarrrggghhh!”
At the sound, Simon’s heart joined the knot in his throat, panic flooding his veins. He knew he had already lost control of the situation, but suddenly it felt ten times worse. He felt like some of his worst fears were coming through, and he was paralyzed by the fear of something else happening to Juliana.
All he wants to do is make things right.
She needs to be okay. She has to be.
Simon tried to take a deep breath to steady his nerves, in an attempt to calm himself down. In through the nose, out through the mouth.
He turned around to face the door, and as he lifted his hand to the handle, he heard another yell followed by more glass shattering.
“AAARRRGGGHHH!”
“NO!” Simon yelled in response, slamming the door open and rushing inside.
He was done deliberating, he had to do something. He wouldn’t leave until Jules let him help her.
Upon entering the living room, Simon could see smashed bottles on the floor that hadn’t been there earlier.
He heard a third smash come from the direction of the bathroom, followed by a yelped hiss and the sound of running water.
Without another thought, Simon rushed to the bathroom, his mind flooding with all kinds of horrible scenarios.
His heart pounded in terror as he approached the doorway, panic flooding his mind as he pushed open the bathroom door.
The world seemed to stop when Simon finally laid eyes on Juliana.
He rushed over to the sink where she was standing, his heart stopping when he saw the shattered mirror and her hands under the faucet, the water running pink.
“Jesus Christ, Juliana! Are you okay!?” He cries out.
“Peachy keen.” She slurs, swaying slightly.
“Oh fuck.” Simon’s words shook as he saw the blood dripping from her hand. She had sliced open the skin on her hand, probably from punching the mirror.
The pit of guilt in his stomach grew ever wider, threatening to consume him.
He put his hands on her shoulders in an attempt to turn her towards him so he could get a look at her hands.
He wanted to help her. He needed to help her.
“Jules, what the hell…what did you do!?” He asked, voice still shaking.
He felt like his world would collapse at any moment.
“What you couldn’t…” She slurs. “Finish the job.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt you!” Simon exclaims, a tear starting to run down his face. “I’m so sorry, I really am.”
It was killing him to see Jules like this. Her eyes were clouded with an alcohol-induced haze, but he could read the anger in her body language.
She was hurting, and he was to blame.
“I want to help you…” He says, voice cracking a little.
“Sure you can, join the party.” She shrugs. “There’s a whole selection under the kitchen sink. Just make sure to clock me in the right spot.”
“I’m not going to hurt you!” Simon cried, his voice laced with notes of desperation. “There has to be some other way to fix this…”
“My ex said that too. And then he tried to kill me anyway. Might as well get it over with, right?” She slurs, still running her hands under the faucet.
“I’m not him!” Simon exclaimed. “I don’t even know who he is!” He shook her by the shoulders and looked directly into her eyes.
He stared at her for a moment, and with a sinking realization came to the conclusion that nothing he said would help.
“I just want to make things right, Juliana. I…I’m so sorry for what I did to you. Please, please forgive me.” Simon pleaded, voice finally cracking.
“Make sure they use lilies at my funeral, not roses.” Juliana slurs, seeming pretty out of it.
“You’re not dying! I’m not going to hurt you!” Simon shouted desperately.
His concern grew even more. Was she going to try to kill herself? Would she really try something like that?
“Juliana, for God’s sake! I’m not going to hurt you, I want to help you!” Was she even listening to anything he said, or had the alcohol blurred her mind so much that nothing was making any sense?
“Hmm, maybe if you hit me again, it’ll sink in this time…” Juliana mumbled.
“NO!” Simon shouted, trying to pull her out of the bathroom.
She may hate him for the rest of his life, but he still cares about her. He’s not going to let her hurt herself, no matter how much she hates him.
“Listen to me!” Simons says as he shakes her shoulders. “I’m not going to let you continue hurting yourself!”
He slid his hands down her arms and he began to drag her away from the sink.
She stumbled as he dragged her, the insane amount of alcohol she had consumed affecting her balance and coordination.
“Christ…” Simon growled, his body tensing as he held Juliana up. “Jules, please, let me help you.” He pleaded. There has to be another way to get through to her.
“Our father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.” She mumbles. “How can God’s name be hallowed if people curse it all the time?” She asks no one in particular.
Simon didn’t really know what to say to that. “Huh?” He asked softly, staring at her.
Why is she bringing up religion? Just how drunk is she? The alcohol must be making her lose her common sense.
“Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.” Juliana continued softly.
“What in the hell?” Simon muttered under his breath, confused. “Jules, where did you learn that?” He asked, as if this were a normal conversation, as if she hadn’t just been talking about killing herself moments ago. “Jules, what the hell is going on with you?” This was taking a turn for the weird, she wasn’t making any sense.
“My grandma, the catholic one.” She slurs. “Used to say it all the time when my mom and I would fight.”
“Your mom and you?” Simon asked, sounding concerned. “Did…did she hit you?”
Some of the puzzle pieces were starting to come together. “Why would she do that?”
He wanted to know, but he knew he had to tread carefully so that he didn’t hurt her further.
“I don’t know why.” Juliana tries to shrug. “I never cared much for religion. What kind of god allows parents to hurt their children?”
“You were abused.” Simon concluded softly, sadness evident in his voice. “Is…isn’t there anyone else you could have turned to about this? Anyone you trust?”
Simon felt like he was starting to understand. He felt guilty for not having understood earlier. For not having seen it sooner.
“You, the team…but when you backhanded me, in front of everyone, I felt like I was back to square zero.” She says softly.
“I’m sorry.” Simon said, his voice laced with intense guilt. “I really am.”
The events of the past two days were his fault. He had driven her to this. He was responsible.
Simon stared at her in silence for a moment. “I’m sorry, Juliana.” For a brief moment, you could see the deep pain in his eyes, the pit of guilt that had been growing, beginning to consume him.
“It’s okay.” She shrugs sadly. “I’ve been through worse.”
His eyebrows furrowed at her statement. “No, no, it’s not okay.” He said seriously, his tone still soft. “It’s never okay for this to happen to anyone. I…I don’t care what’s happened, or what you’ve done. No one deserves to be abused.”
“For the longest time… I believed it was my fault, that I had done something wrong.” She whispered.
“It wasn’t your fault.” Simon said with conviction. “It was never your fault.”
He felt awful. Simon felt awful that she had been through this, twice, and that he had contributed to it.
“Juliana, you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s your parent’s fault. It’s your ex’s fault. Not yours.” He said, trying to convince her. He wanted to make sure she knew it wasn’t her fault. To make sure that she didn’t blame herself for what had happened, never again.
Juliana looked at him, tears beginning to slide down her face.
Simon saw the tears in her eyes, and felt his heart shatter. He hadn’t felt like this in years, he felt worse than he had in a long time, seeing her cry like this.
“It’s okay Jules.” He said softly. He lifted her up a little bit so that she could sag against him as he wrapped his arms tightly around her. “You’ll be okay.”
Simon sighed as he looked down at her. “Just… just promise me one thing, okay?” He asked softly. “Promise me you’ll stop drinking like this, okay?”
He looked at her, sounding a bit desperate. “You’re drunk. Very drunk. And your emotions are running high. You can’t keep going like this, Jules. You know I’m right.” He said firmly.
“I don’t even like alcohol.” She mumbles. “It’s gross.”
“Yet you’ve been drinking it anyway, why?” Simon asked, notes of confusion in his voice. He didn’t understand. Why drink if she doesn’t like the taste?
“Nothing hurts when I’m drunk. Everything feels numb.” She says.
“And what do you do when you sober up? It will still be there, waiting for you. You’re only going to hurt yourself more if you keep drinking like this, Jules.” He sighs. “Drinking your problems away doesn’t solve them, trust me.”
“I know it doesn’t actually fix anything.” She sighs. “But sometimes it’s nice to not have to feel anything for a little while.”
“It’s never good to numb yourself out like this.” Simon gently explained. “It always gets worse when you sober up. Please, stop drinking like this. You’re better than this.” He said, notes of concern and love in his voice. “You’re worth more than this, Juliana.”
“Is that what you were thinking when you hit me?” Jules asked quietly.
“Do you want to hear the honest answer, or the sugar-coated answer? Because I’ll give you the honest answer.” Simon said, slightly bitter. “I was angry. I was mad at you. And I let that anger get the best of me. “I’m sorry.” He said sincerely.
“Thank you for being honest.” She said softly.
“So… will you stop trying to drown yourself in alcohol?” Simon asked, hoping she understood how worried he was and how much he cared. “Please?”
“Yeah… I think I’m done.” She whispered. “Help me pour it out?”
“Sure.” He replied, the sound of relief evident in his voice.
He helped her pour out the bottles sitting on the kitchen counter, and he grabbed the bottles under the kitchen sink and emptied those as well. He searched the fridge and the kitchen cabinets, and poured out the bottle he found.
“I think I got it all.” He said softly.
“Did you check under the bathroom sink?” She asked.
“Under the sink?” Simon sighed, going to the bathroom to retrieve the two bottles stashed there. How long has this been a problem that she has so much alcohol hidden in her apartment?
“That should be the last of it.” He said gently.
“You know, it’s kinda funny.” Juliana muses. “I tried to go to AA when I was 19. No one believed I had a problem… A 19 year old college girl with a drinking problem? Nah.”
“That’s awful, I’m sorry they didn’t believe you, that you didn’t get the help you needed.” Simon said softly.
“I was underage, but otherwise well put together.” She shrugs. “I didn’t fit the stereotype.”
“Even so.” Simon said, slightly frustrated. “They should have helped, not turned you away.”
“Did... did you ever try again? To get help?” Simon asked, sounding worried.
“No. I took the initial failure as a sign that I had to fix it by myself.” She answered.
“It doesn’t have to be that way. You can get help.” Simon squeezed her gently. “There are people who care. I care, Juliana, I really do. Let me help you.”
“I know you do.” Juliana sighs. “But when my boyfriend hits me when he gets upset in an argument, that really scared me, Simon.”
“I’m sorry, Juliana. I shouldn’t have done that. There is never a good reason to hurt someone like that.” Simon said, pain in his voice. “I won’t do it again, I promise.”
“I hope not.” She tries to stand on her own, but wobbles because of all the alcohol.
“Are you okay?” Simon asks. “You’re still very unsteady. Should you be standing?”
“I need to go to the bathroom… I feel like I’m gonna be sick.” She wobbles.
“Okay, let’s get you to the bathroom.” Simon helped her get to the toilet, just in time before the alcohol made a gross reappearance.
She leaned over the toilet, and all the alcohol in her stomach started the process of leaving her system.
“That’s it. Get it all out.” Simon soothed, rubbing her back. “You need to rest, Juliana. You’re not in a good state right now. You need sleep, or you’re going to feel worse.”
“Ughhh, I already feel awful.” Juliana groans. “I remember the last time I got alcohol poisoning. It was horrible.”
“That’s why I was trying to stop you from drinking more.” Simon said, his voice slightly cold. He knew that he had to stop her from continuing down this path of self-destruction. He had to stop it.
“I get it, Simon. I fucked up.” She said flatly.
“You made a mistake. You were upset. I get it. I’m not mad at you. But I want you to get better.” He said softly.
“Ok.” She wobbles as she tries to stand up. “I… I want to take a shower… but I… I…”
Simon helps her to her feet and helps her towards the shower. “Here we go.” He says gently.
He opened the shower curtain and helped her get undressed, starting the water at a warm temperature. He helped her sit down in the tub, and knelt next to it as he started to help her bathe, as if she were a child.
“I’m sorry for fucking up.” She said quietly as he washed her hair.
“It’s alright, Juliana.” Simon replied as he continued to wash her, taking care to be gentle. “I’m here to help you.”
“Thank you.” She sighed under his touch. “I’m the worst girlfriend ever…”
“I think you’re a pretty nice girlfriend, actually. This was just a hiccup, you didn’t do it intentionally.” Simon said gently as he helped her wash off. “Nobody is perfect, Jules, but that’s okay. It’s what makes us human.”
“You’re not alone. You have people who love you. Me included.” He said.
“I’m sorry, Simon. For everything, for… for this, for arguing with you, for provoking you to the point of violence. I’m sorry.” She says, tears gathering in her eyes.
Simon sat silently for a moment as he helped her rinse the shampoo from her hair. After a bit, he felt like some of the weight had been lifted from his shoulders. “It’s alright, Jules. It… It was a mistake. But we’re okay, we’ll move on from this. And it wasn’t just you who provoked me, I also reacted poorly.”
“I know I don’t say it often enough, but I appreciate you Simon. My life is better with you in it.” She teeters a little, the alcohol still making its way through her system. “I… I don’t ever want to lose you.”
Simon took a deep breath, and then pressed a kiss to her cheek. “I love you Juliana. I don’t ever want to lose you either.” He said softly. “You’re amazing, you know that?”
She lets out a small laugh. “Simon, I look ridiculous, I’m drunk, naked, and covered in soap suds because I can’t even shower by myself right now.”
“And yet you’re still beautiful.” Simon said matter-of-factly. “You’re still gorgeous even if you do look kind of ridiculous.”
“Even when I’m wasted?” Juliana whispers.
“Even when you’re wasted, or sick, or tired, or any version of anything you think is less than perfect.” He kissed her cheek again. “I will always love you, no matter what. I am here to protect you.” He said, almost as if he were swearing a promise.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever be deserving of you, Simon.” She whispered fondly before pressing a kiss to his jaw.
“Trust me, you are. I don’t want anybody else. I love you, all of you. Your faults, your flaws, your traumas, your insecurities. All of you, Juliana.” He gently ran a hand down her hair as he finished rinsing her off. “Don’t you ever doubt that.”
She shivered, a tingle running down her spine.
“I love you.” She whispers. “But can we get out of the shower now? The water is starting to run cold…”
“Yeah, of course.” Simon nodded, turning off the water. “Give me a moment, yeah?” He grabbed a towel and gently picked her up, sitting her on the outside edge of the tub.
“Just dry off a bit, I’ll grab you some clothes.” He rubbed her arms a bit to warm her up.
“Here you go.” Simon stepped back into the bathroom, clean pajamas in hand.
Juliana shivered, despite the warm steam in the bathroom.
“Are you alright?” He asked as he saw her shiver, wanting to make sure she was okay.
“It’s kinda cold…” She shivered again. “I think the alcohol is making its way through my system.”
“Alright, let’s get you in bed and get you warmed up.” He helped her get dried off and dressed, then picked her up and carried her to the bedroom, carefully setting her down on the bed.
He pulled up the blankets around her, before kicking off his shoes and sliding under the covers next to her.
“Thank you Simon, for not abandoning me.” She whispered, snuggling into his side. “I’m sorry for hurting you.”
“I’m right here.” He replied. “You’re safe, no one is going to hurt you anymore. You’ll always be safe with me. I’m never leaving you, ever. Okay?”
She nods, tucking her face into his neck.
Simon grew quiet, wrapping his arms around her, gently rubbing up and down her back.
“You’re warm.” Juliana mumbled softly.
“Is it comforting?” Simon asked.
“Mmhmm. You smell good, too, like home.”
“I… I do? I smell good?” Simon wondered curiously, running his fingers lightly through her wet hair.
“Yeah,” She mumbles. “Like spice, and pine, and… and home…”
Simon smiled at her description, his heart fluttering a little bit. “You’ve got to rest now, my sweet girl. That’s the best thing for you right now. Get some sleep, I’m right here.”
“Not close enough.” Jules muttered, wrapping an arm around Simon’s torso and bringing herself tighter against him, with surprising strength for someone so drunk.
Simon let out a small laugh at her actions. “You want me right next to you, huh?”
He gently pulled her tighter against him. “Alright love, I’m right here. You’ve got me.” He whispered, tucking her closer to him.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
knowing that canon simon grew up in an abusive home with him regularly seeing his mother (and him and his brother tommy) getting beaten up by his alcoholic dad that the first thing he did when he was able and earning was to kick that guy out, your fic feels wrong and hurtful.
i can’t believe that simon would do that, not to mention the disgust and disbelief for the enabling actions of price and the rest of team, i just refuse to believe that they would do that. but i also know that that’s wishful thinking. i know because i am my father’s daughter and fact is, hurt people hurt people. and for all the many fanfic written here about fluffy or softie simon, the reality will probably be nowhere near that. i guess what im trying to say is, your writing is good and too realistic that it wakes up feelings that i tried to bury.
i want to say that i wont read anymore of your fics but that would be a lie. nevertheless, thank you for sharing your work with us.
Hey anon, thank you for your feedback.
I honestly deliberated back and forth a lot as to whether or not I wanted to even publish the “deep end” series. It’s one of the heavier pieces I’ve published, and while I agree that I hope Simon wouldn’t do something like that, I wanted to explore the darker aspects of his personality as it relates to his previous trauma.
The original version that I sketched out was much darker than what I published, dark enough that it made me reconsider what I was writing out.
Juliana as a character isn’t fully fleshed out yet, but she has a very labile personality, and tends to feed into her insecurities in order to try to push Simon’s buttons in hopes of getting a reaction out of him.
At the beginning of part 1, it says that tensions have been high the past couple of weeks due to multiple failures, and that Simon and Jules have been arguing more and more in the time leading up to this fic.
I haven’t written out what happens just yet, but the idea that I have so far is that Jules has been pushing and pushing Simon, waiting for him to snap.
Part of Juliana’s issues stem from the fact that while she believes that everything bad that happens to her is her own fault, she still instigates conflict in order to get reactions from people, because her past experiences have taught her that any attention is good, whether the reactions are good or bad.
She has a very unhealthy view of herself, and she hasn’t really taken the steps to try to figure out why that is.
Simon never had the intention to hurt Jules, but she’s been pushing and pushing him, and with enough force, people eventually snap. Hence why he feels so incredibly guilty, because he loves her, and doesn’t ever want to cause her pain again.
As for the team’s reaction, I would hope that they wouldn’t let an assault incident slide, but I feel like I also don’t know all of their characters well enough to say so. I’ve been trying to work off of what I know from the canon, but between both versions of MW, I feel like there isn’t enough information as to what the team is like outside of the field.
Unfortunately, I’ve seen enough incidents where the chain of command gets a little messed up, and people try to cover for each other when something happens, hence why their reactions are a little convoluted.
Whether or not you choose to continue reading any of my works, I do appreciate the feedback. I use my writing as an outlet for my own problems and feelings, and that tends to influence the type of content that ends up in different fics.
Should you choose to continue reading, part 3 of “deep end” should be finished within the next day or so, and hopefully it can provide some context to the first two parts.
i’d drift away and you’d pull me in, but the waves are deep and i’m wearing thin (deep end, part 2)
A/N: continued content warning for this mini series, suicidal ideation, domestic violence, and excessive consumption of alcohol.
Simon spent the second half of the day looking for Juliana, but couldn’t find her anywhere. By noon the next day, Simon had looked in every possible place he could think of, with not a single sign of her anywhere.
“Damn it…” Simon mutters. “Where in the fucking hell is she!? If she’s not here, then where in the hell is she?”
Simon was running out of ideas. He’d looked everywhere he could think of on base, and he couldn’t find her anywhere.
Then it hit him. If he couldn’t find her anywhere on base, maybe it was because she was no longer on the base.
She must have gone home.
“FUCK!” Simon shouted. She had to have gone home. And… hopefully stayed home. At this point Jules had been gone a full 24 hours, which meant that she could be anywhere if she hadn’t stayed home. She lived an hour away from the base. If she had gone home, but then left, she could be anywhere, and Simon would have no idea where to start looking.
Simon took off back to his room to retrieve what he would need before leaving the base to look for Juliana. He was anxious to know what had happened to her in the past 24 hours. It was all his fault. He should have never yelled at her like that, he should have never laid his hands on her. He should have known better.
His heart sunk further into his stomach the more he thought about it. It was his fault she was hurt, it was his fault she had run. And if anything happened to her, it would be Simon’s fault.
He had to get to her, and soon. Simon drove faster than he should have to get to her apartment, almost cutting the usually hour-long drive in half.
Finally arriving at her apartment building, Simon parked the car and sprinted up the stairs to the entrance. He rang the door buzzer, hoping that Juliana would answer. Instead he was buzzed in without so much as a question about who it was.
Going through the front door and into the elevator, he tried to calm his nerves while he waited to get to her floor. His heart was pounding as he stepped forward to knock on her apartment door.
“Juliana?” He knocked on the door, waiting. He could hear music pounding through the hallway, and he was starting to wonder if anyone could hear him from inside the apartment. “Juliana? It’s me, Simon. I’d like…to talk to you for a bit…about what happened yesterday.” He said a little louder, hoping someone would hear him.
The volume on the music went down significantly before the lock clicked and the door was slowly pulled open.
“Lieutenant Simon ‘Ghost’ Riiiiiiilllllllleeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyy.” Juliana slurred. “Come to finish the job?”
Is she….is she drunk!?
“Juliana…” Simon was surprised at the state she was in when she opened the door. She was definitely drunk. The way she spoke, her demeanor, all of it pointed to being drunk.
He felt a pang of guilt in his chest. He had caused this. He’d never seen her like this before. He’d seen her tipsy, maybe a little drunk, after a fun night out with the team, but never… wasted. Absolutely, utterly, wasted.
He reached out to place a hand on her shoulder, and felt his heart sink when she pulled back away from him.
“...I came to apologize.” He said as he entered and shut the door, his tone of voice serious.
She ignores his statement. “If you’re gonna kill me, keep it clean.” She slurs. “I don’t wanna lose my security deposit.”
“What!?” Simon asked, his eyes widening in shock. “What are you talking about? Jules, I would never hurt you!” He said, his voice cracking. “I swear, I’m here to apologize. I never meant to hurt you.”
“S’not what you said yesterday when ya smacked me.” She slurs. “Ya shoulda been rougher with me. Oh, harder daddy!” She moans sarcastically.
She looks at the bottle in her hand. “Ya know, my daddy was right, four bottles in, and I agree that the black label is better than the red label.”
Simon felt a pit of guilt open up inside him as he listened to her. She was right, he had hurt her. He shouldn’t have done that. And now, she was determined to hurt him back.
“Jules…” He said, trying to keep his tone calm and even. “What do I have to do to get you to forgive me?”
She chugged a few more gulps of the whiskey before answering. “Whatever you want, baby, I can take it.”
“I want your forgiveness, what do you want me to do?” He waited for her response, but he wasn’t sure what she’d say to him next.
Jules holds up a finger and chugs half the bottle. “Ooh, that kinda burns.” She hisses.
“Juliana, be careful with that.” Simon says, a flash of concern burning in his chest. He was still trying to act tough, but what he really wanted to do was just help her. He stood where he was, waiting for her to say something else to him.
“Are you going to say anything?” He asked, his tone starting to grow firm.
She ignored him and wandered off, reaching for another bottle on the kitchen island.
“Jules, you need to slow down…” He said, concerned.
“Slow down? Baby, I’m on the highway to hell! There ain’t no slowing down here!” She grinned, popping off the cap.
“Juliana, listen. Don’t drink anymore. You’re drinking too much. You need to slow down. Don’t make yourself sick.” He says, his concern beginning to turn into panic.
“Don’t make yourself sick.” Juliana mocks. “What’re ya gonna do, hit me if I don’t stop?”
Simon flinches, feeling another flash of guilt. He couldn’t really blame her for what she was saying. “I never meant to. Jules, please, just listen to me.”
He took a couple of steps forward, just to try to take the bottle from her.
But when he stepped forward, she stepped back, pushing him back with a hand against his chest. She then proceeded to chug a couple of gulps from the bottle.
She is most definitely drunk.
“Stop… Please, Juliana. You need to stop drinking, please.” Simon doesn’t know what to do. He’s never seen her like this before.
She gives a slight cough as she lowers the bottle. “You ever got alcohol poisoning before?”
“Alcohol poisoning?” Simon froze. “Juliana… are you–”
Simon didn’t finish the question, but given the state of the apartment, he could assume she’s been drinking for hours.
“Juliana, what are you doing!? You need to stop!” He says, trying to keep the panic out of his voice as his tone escalates. “You’ll drink yourself to death!”
“That’s the plan.” She shrugs as she raises the bottle up again.
“Juliana, please, stop!” Simon shouts as he tries to take the bottle from her. But she refused to let go of it. Simon didn’t want to hurt her, so he was having a hard time getting it away from her.
“Stop! You’re hurting yourself! Why are you doing this to yourself?” He pleaded, tears starting to gather in his eyes.
“BECAUSE EVERYONE ELSE DOES IT TO ME.” She screams. “FOR ONCE I WANT TO BE IN CONTROL OF WHO HURTS ME.”
“Juliana!” Simon shouts. “You’re not in control! You can’t make it stop by killing yourself!”
All the hurt he’d caused her came flooding back into his mind. He just wanted her to not be in pain. “I’m sorry! I’m so fucking sorry!” He cried out. “Please, I’m so goddamn sorry!”
“Then get the fuck out.” She sneers.
“Jules, please, you don’t mean that.” He said, voice pleading. The guilt Simon had been feeling was starting to hurt. He was angry. He had hurt Juliana, and had been one of the things that drove her to do this. “Damn it, Jules. Look at me!” He snapped. “You’re ruining your life by doing this! You have to stop, or at least slow down!”
“THERE’S NOTHING LEFT TO BE RUINED.” She screamed back.
“YES THERE IS!” Simon shouted, a lump starting to form in his throat. “You have your life! You have a whole life ahead of you! You can’t give up like this!” Simon was filled with panic now. This couldn’t be happening. He cared about Juliana, he couldn’t lose her. There had to be a way to fix this. He had to fix this. He had to make things right.
“I GAVE UP A LONG TIME AGO. I HELD ON FOR YOU, AND YOU ENDED UP BEING JUST. LIKE. HIM.”
“Then why are you still here!?” Simon shouted, throwing his arms up in the air. “You’re still alive!” He exclaimed, before pointing to himself. “And don’t tell me I’m anything like him.”
“You’re still here, you’re still alive!” He screamed, pointing at her. “And I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry. But please! Please! I’m sorry for everything! I didn’t mean to hurt you! I really didn’t!”
“Can you please forgive me?” He asks, his voice cracking.
“TO QUOTE YOU FROM YESTERDAY: GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT.” Juliana screamed at him.
“Fine.” Simon stared at her for a moment.
He felt hurt, angry, and upset. But most of all, he felt guilty.
“Fine.” He repeated, before turning and leaving, slamming the apartment door shut behind him.
He hoped she would be alright. He hoped she would stop drinking. He just hoped to God that she would be okay.
But he had a feeling all his hope would be in vain.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
it all feels the same with your eyes closed (deep end, part 1)
A/N: This mini series needs a content warning for suicidal ideation, domestic violence, and excessive alcohol consumption. (I told y’all I was gonna throw some angst at ya.)
Things had been tense around base since the return of Task Force 141 after an unsuccessful mission. Mistakes had been made, resulting in the loss of personnel and vital intel.
The main core personnel of the Task Force were currently in a meeting, discussing information for an upcoming mission. The meeting was already tense, but it escalated as Simon and Juliana were arguing back and forth about protocols.
“I AM YOUR SUPERIOR OFFICER. I’M THE ONE IN CHARGE HERE.” Simon yells at Juliana before backhanding her across the face so hard that she stumbles back.
The room goes silent, shock spreading among everyone as they stare at the couple.
Simon throws a vicious glare at Juliana before spitting out the final piece of the argument. “Get the fuck out of my sight.”
She doesn’t bother to grab her things before sprinting out of the room.
Simon stares at the door she left through for a brief second, before turning to the rest of the room. Tensions were high, but he was trying to remain calm after his outburst. “I’m sorry you had to witness that. I’ll handle this. We’ll continue later.” He says gruffly.
He sighed internally. What was she so upset about anyway? Simon doesn’t like fighting with her, but lately it’s been happening more and more.
“Witness that? Simon, you just hit your girlfriend, not to mention you just assaulted a fellow soldier, IN FRONT OF WITNESSES.” Captain Price roars.
Simon flinches at Price’s reaction, and tries to defend his actions without being rude. “I wouldn’t have hit her without reason. I had to do what I did. It’s not like I’m proud of it. I’ll handle it, and apologize to her personally.”
“Good luck getting her to hold still long enough to do that.” Soap mutters under his breath.
“Soap!” Simon whirls on Johnny, glaring at him intensely. “Are you insinuating what I think you are right now?”
“It depends, sir,” Soap addressed him mockingly. “What is it you think I’m insinuating?”
Simon’s voice became harsh, as he spoke quickly. “I want a straight answer, Soap. Are you implying that she’s going to be so furious, that she’s going to fight me?”
“I’m implying, sir,” Soap mocks again, “That you’ll be hard pressed to even find her and get her to listen long enough for you to say the words ‘I’m sorry’, without her bolting. There’s a reason we call her Bambi.”
Simon sighed, he knew Johnny was right. She would disappear the minute she saw him. He had to do something.
His mind raced, trying to think of a plan. He didn’t know where she’d run off to, he just knew she was angry. Very angry.
“I’ll find her. I’ll make sure she hears me out.” Simon huffs.
“You’d better get this sorted out, and fast Simon. We’re getting deployed again in a few weeks, and we need this team 100% together.” Captain Price says sternly.
Simon nods, still pissed that this even became a fight in the first place. “She’ll come around. I’ll make sure of it.”
He then turns to Johnny and Kyle. “You two keep your mouths shut about this. Especially you, Soap. We don’t need anymore drama. Are we clear?”
Johnny looks him squarely in the eye. “If she wants to fill out a SHARP violation report against you, I’ll happily sign as a witness.”
“Soap…” Simon sighs. He doesn’t want any more trouble. He just needs Juliana to understand her place in the chain of command. He needs her to understand why he did what he did. He can’t afford to lose his job because of one stupid mistake. He needs to not let his temper get the better of him. He needs a break.
He looked at Johnny, then Kyle, then Price, then back at Johnny. “Soap, don’t force me into doing something drastic over this. Understood?”
“What, are you gonna hit me too? Beat me into submission? No wonder Bambi is so banged up all the time.” Johnny spits venomously.
Simon growls angrily. He was already on edge, and now this? He had a serious urge to hit something, but he held it in.
“You think it’s funny, making jokes about this?” He clenches his fists, setting them down harshly on the table. He lets out a deep breath, trying to get himself under control. “I’m warning you, Soap. For the last time, keep your mouth shut, or I’ll make you. Got it?”
“It’s not a joke, not this time.” Johnny growls. “This had to have escalated from somewhere. You make a regular habit of hitting your girlfriend to get what you want?”
Simon’s mind goes blank. A regular habit of hitting her? A sense of shock went through his system. He didn’t know Johnny could think of him that way.
“Don’t assume you know anything, Soap.” He says coldly. “I don’t go around hitting her all the time. I’ve only done it once. Just this one time. One. Time.”
“That’s what they all say.” Johnny sneers at him.
Simon took a deep breath trying to keep everything under control. He couldn’t believe Johnny was saying all of this.
“Soap, I swear to God, I only hit her this once. It was my fault, but I’ve never done it, and I won’t do it again. You’re only making this worse. We are supposed to be a team. Remember?”
“Yeah. Teammates are supposed to protect each other. They don’t backhand each other during arguments.” Soap retorts.
Simon knew he was in the wrong for hitting Juliana. He felt bad for hitting her, but he felt like he couldn’t admit that in front of Johnny, he was already digging himself in way too deep.
“I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have done it, you’re right. I let my anger get the best of me. It won’t happen again.”
He stared at the floor while he tried to figure out what to say next.
“Please, let’s just try to work through this. Don’t go around telling anyone else about this.”
“Fine.” Soap scoffs. “I won’t say anything. But if I catch even a hint that something is off, I’ll file the damn SHARP report myself.” Johnny stands up to leave, pausing in the doorway. “I wouldn’t be surprised if she was halfway through writing up a unit transfer request already.”
Simon watched as Johnny left the room. What had he done? How could he let his anger take control of him like that? Would Juliana really file a transfer request because of all this? Would he lose everything over this? And why was Johnny so defensive of her?
“Damnit.” He muttered. “I really need to talk to her. Now.”
Why had Johnny been so protective of Juliana? What is going on here?
Johnny must have known something Simon didn’t, something he wasn’t telling Simon. But that wasn’t important. He needs to go find Juliana and fix all of this.
Unless… unless Johnny really does know something. Maybe it will help Simon figure out where it all went wrong.
“Fucking hell.” Simon swore. Johnny might be the only one who might know something about what’s going on, or where Juliana went. As much as he hated the idea, asking Johnny was worth a shot.
He made his way to Johnny’s room, and knocked on the door. He just wanted to talk to the man and hear what he had to say himself.
Johnny opened the door. “Come to take a shot at another teammate?”
Simon glared at him. “You know what, Soap?” He growled. “Quit your bullshit. I know that you know where Bambi is, and I know you know why she’s mad. So tell me. Now.”
Johnny leveled him with a cool stare. “I don’t know where she is.” He said plainly.
“I don’t believe you. Why were you defending her so much?” Simon asks. He knew there was something happening that he didn’t know about. He could feel it, he just doesn’t know what it’s about. “I need the real reason, Soap.”
“Why wouldn’t I defend her!? I’ve had family go through what she has, and I’m not about to let her go through it alone again.”
‘Had family members go through….’? What the hell? Simon’s eyes widened a bit. When it clicked, Simon was surprised to hear that Johnny had a family history of domestic abuse. He hadn’t realized that that was the reason Johnny defended Juliana so much.
Johnny thought Simon was abusing her…
“So, you know something about her past, then?” He asks.
Johnny’s eyes widened. “You… you mean she hasn’t told… you?”
Simon frowned. Why hadn’t she told him anything about that part of her past? He was confused.
“No. She didn’t. And now I need to know, Soap. What happened?”
He ran his hands over his balaclava. Maybe this was the reason she got so upset? If this was the case, then he needed to tread very carefully, at least until he figured out more of what was going on.
“I don’t know the whole story, just bits and pieces, but enough to know that it was bad. Like, really bad. Almost career ending bad.” Johnny explained.
Simon was slightly disturbed by that description. He couldn’t imagine what might have happened for her to be reacting like this. He couldn’t imagine what she had gone through. What did Johnny mean by ‘almost career ending’?
“Can you at least give me some sort of basic idea? Anything, Soap, please.” Simon never pleads, ever, but right now he is. He looked at Johnny, worry and concern evident in his eyes.
“Juliana had gotten into a relationship of sorts with someone on her team, and when the guy got promoted, he outranked her, he became her superior officer.” Johnny begins. “He started getting violent with her behind closed doors, especially whenever she’d disagree with him about missions or protocols.” He pauses. “I know at one point, he hurt Jules so badly she was in the ICU for six days, and she almost got medically discharged from service. That’s when she finally put in for a transfer.”
Simon’s face paled under his mask. His hands shook slightly, but he wasn’t sure if it was from anger at himself or at the guy who hurt Juliana. This was too much for one person to carry alone.
“And… she went through all of that…. Alone? She never said anything to me, ever!” Simon sighed. “I need to find her and make sure she’s okay. I’ve fucked up, and I’m the only one who can fix this.”
Johnny shakes his head. “The only reason she told me was because she overheard me talking on the phone with my sister about a similar issue, and she offered her help. Otherwise, I don’t think she ever would have said anything.”
Simon ran his hands down his face. “So… if she hasn’t told me anything about it… I guess she doesn’t want me to know… Did she ever go into any detail about what happened, or about who this person might be?”
“She never specified, she just said someone from a previous unit. Refused to say when or where.” Johnny explains.
Simon nods. “Alright. Well… thank you for at least telling me this, Soap. I would’ve never known.”
He couldn’t believe that he hadn’t ever noticed something like this. He had always known Juliana as one of the most gentle, kind-hearted people he had met. He would never have dreamt that she had gone through something like this before.
But it also made something clear. Simon could never allow anything like this to happen to her, ever again. He would have to protect Jules - no matter what it took.
Sometimes, the people with the brightest smiles are the ones who have gone through the most oppressive darkness.
“I need to find her. I have to make sure that her past won’t define who she is in the future.” Simon sighs deeply.
“It might already be too late for that, Simon.” Johnny says cautiously.
“Do not tell anyone else about this, Johnny. You got that? We can’t have rumors spreading around right now. Understood?”
“Yes, sir.” Johnny rolls his eyes.
“Good. I appreciate it.” Simon turns to leave, and makes his way across the base, going through different areas in search of Juliana. “God damnit” He swears. “Where in the hell is she?”
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
i pray with the devil you rest in peace (divinity, part 2)
As a result of the success of the mission, everyone had been given a few days leave to rest and recuperate. Simon and Artemis had decided to spend their leave together, using the quiet days to spend some time together, in a calm, relaxed environment.
After a chill night watching movies and playing video games, Simon and Artemis had fallen asleep cuddling on his bed, enjoying a restful evening together.
Simon was fast asleep on the bed, a soft smile on his face as his chest rose and fell with his breathing. Both of them were dressed for comfort, Simon in a black t-shirt and sweatpants, Artemis in pajama pants and one of Simon’s hoodies.
Simon rolled over in his sleep, pulling Artemis closer to him. His arm was draped around her back, tucking his face into her neck. He sighs, nuzzling into her.
Artemis was having a dream…no, a nightmare. She feels like she can’t breathe. The memory of the enemy soldier’s knife pressed against her throat causes her to whimper in her sleep.
Her whimpering rouses Simon from the confines of sleep, and he pulls back slightly to look at her. He starts gently running his fingers through her hair, leaning up to kiss her forehead, trying to provide any semblance of comfort during the nightmare she’s experiencing.
“Shh…everything’s okay now… I promise you’re safe, I’ll always protect you. Just like I did then.” He whispers softly.
“No…please…let me go…” She mumbles quietly, a frown marring her features.
“Hey, hey, It’s okay.” He gently pulled her closer to him, putting a hand on her shoulder and leaning her against him. His voice was warm and soft, soft and comforting.
“You’re safe. You’re safe, okay? He’s gone. He’s gone and he’s not coming back.” Simon tried to keep his voice steady as he comforted Artemis, trying to keep any notes of panic out. He kept his arms tightly around her, trying to help her. “You’re okay, I’m right here.”
Her hand reached up to scratch at the wound across her throat. “Simon… Simon… please… help.” She whimpers, scratching at her neck.
He grabbed her hand with one one of his one, pulling it away, placing it against his chest. “Don’t touch it, sweetheart. You’ll undo the bandages, Temi.”
His voice remained gentle, but he was starting to worry. “Artemis, you’re going to be alright. I’m here. You’re okay.”
She starts hyperventilating, the nightmare getting worse. “Please… help me… please.” She whimpers, tears beginning to escape from her closed eyes.
“It’s okay, it’s okay…” Simon soothed her, trying to quell his own panic. “I’m here, I’m here, it’s okay.” He held her tightly as he tried to soothe her back to a steady breathing rate. “You’re going to be okay, I promise. I’ll keep you safe.”
Simon continues to try to comfort her as she cries, when a thought hits him like a bolt of lightning.
He took a deep breath before speaking. “Artemis, sweetheart, wake up.” He shook her shoulder gently. “Come on, it’s okay, wake up, love.”
Between Simon calling her name and the gentle rocking of her body, Artemis woke up in a gasp, her eyes filling with tears.
“Hey… it’s okay. You’re okay.” He soothed as he looked at her, eyes wide and tearful, his own eyes filled with worry. “I’m here, Temi, I’m here. You’re safe.” He pulled her close, resting her head on his chest. “It’s okay, you’re safe.”
She buries her head in Simon’s chest as she lets out a few quiet sobs. “He had me… he was gonna…”
“I know.” Simon whispers, holding onto her tightly, wanting nothing more than to comfort her. “But you’re safe now. I won’t let anyone hurt you. He can’t hurt you again.”
He repeated softly, holding her tight as she cried. “It’s okay, you’re safe, I’m here.”
“You’re here.” She repeated in a whisper. “You’re here.”
“I’m here.” He repeated back to her, his voice gentle. He didn’t ever want to see her get hurt again, and all he wanted right now was to give her all the comfort in the world.
“I’m not going anywhere, I promise. He won’t hurt you ever again, Artemis. Never again…”
As her sobs started to subside, the tension in her body started to release.
Simon let out a soft sigh as he felt her body start to relax. She was safe, and she was out of that terrifying nightmare. He kept his arms securely around her, and leaned his head up to press a kiss into her hair. “Do you know what I'm most worried about?” He asks softly, pressing another gentle kiss to her head.
“What?” She whispers.
“You.” He replies quietly. Simon stroked a gentle hand down her back, trying to let her know that he was there, that she was safe, and that he would keep her safe. She couldn’t see it, but his expression was filled with worry and concern for her. Simon just wants to keep his Artemis safe.
“I’m not going to let anything happen to you. I don’t want anything to happen to you.” He whispers.
“I’m okay.” She whispers back. “It was just a nightmare.”
“I know.” He brushes his hand up and down her back again before pressing another kiss to her hair. “You’re safe now. You’re going to be okay.”
“I’m safe.” She repeats. “I’m okay.”
Simon pulled away from the hug for a moment to look into her eyes, trying to get a gauge on how she was feeling. He smiled gently, squeezing her in reassurance. “You’re okay.” He whispered, pressing her body into his again, softly stroking her hair and her back.
He never wanted something like that to happen to her again. He silently vowed to always be a safe place for her, to always protect her. “You’re okay, you’re safe, I’m here.”
“I’m okay, I’m safe, you’re here.” She mumbled sleepily.
Simon sighed in relief when he heard Artemis repeat her answer again, happy to hear that she had calmed down again. “I’m here Artemis, I’ll always be here.”
He held her close, running his hand up and down her back, over and over. He softly kissed the top of her head again, before whispering, “I love you.”
“...love you…” She mumbled back, already half asleep.
Simon smiled gently, leaning in to press a kiss to her forehead. “I love you, Artemis.”
He was content to fall asleep again with her wrapped in his arms, wanting nothing more than for that moment to last forever. All he wanted was an eternal moment of peace with the two of them together, after everything they’ve been through.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
long is the road outta hell into misery (divinity, part 1)
No matter how well a plan is made, no matter how much preparation goes into briefings and gear checks, no matter how much training is done, sometimes all hell breaks loose, and the inevitable happens: the mission goes sideways.
Task Force 141 had been sent on a mission to seize intel from servers on an enemy base. They had been split up into teams to search for the information and load it onto flash drives before making a clean exfil. But alas, life doesn’t always go as planned. The smaller teams were effective for infiltration, but it also meant that they were more vulnerable to being cornered by the enemy.
Ghost and Jaguar had been sent to one side of the base, but as they were getting ready to leave for the RV point for exfil, they got separated.
Ghost was almost frantic, searching their side of the base for Jaguar, determined to not leave her behind, when he heard a piercing scream that he immediately knew meant she’d been captured.
He ran down a few hallways following where he thought the scream had come from, and as he rounded the corner, what he saw made his blood run cold.
Artemis, one of the bright spots of sun in Simon’s life, was being held at knife point by an enemy soldier.
Ghost’s voice was quiet, but laced with firm, intense anger. “Let her go.”
“Ghost, it’s okay.” Jaguar pleads, a note of strain in her voice. “Don’t give them the flash drive.”
Ghost looked past her and to the soldier behind her. “You’re a dead man walking, pal. It’s the way it goes.” His voice was sharp, his hands level as he prepared to shoot. “You either let her go, or I kill you and you still let her go.” He growls, his pistol aimed firmly in their direction.
“How are you so sure you won’t hit her too!?” The soldier sneers, pressing the knife firmly against Jaguar’s throat, causing her to flinch.
“What makes you think I’ll miss?” Ghost hisses, his anger fueled by his concern for Jaguar. He was ready for anything, he would do anything, to make sure that Artemis got out of this alive. “Now let. Her. Go.”
The soldier presses the knife tighter against Jaguar’s throat, causing a thin line of blood to appear.
“You need to get out of here.” Artemis whimpers. “We’re running out of time.”
Ghost’s breath came sharply through his teeth, the pistol in his hand starting to shake. “Don’t give me orders, Jaguar.” He hissed at the soldier. “If you kill her, I’ll make sure you have a slow, painful death.” He vows. “Do you understand me?” He readjusted his grip on the pistol. There was a 50/50 chance this would go the way he wanted it to, but they were running out of time and options.
“The longer I hold you here, the higher the chance I have of reinforcements showing up.” The soldier says. “And like your little girlfriend said, you’re running out of time.”
“You are making every wrong decision here, asshole. Either drop the knife and walk away, or I’ll kill you. There is no third option.” Ghost said firmly, not a hint of emotion present in his voice.
“I think we both know at least one of us isn’t walking away from this.” The soldier huffs a laugh, tilting the flat side of the knife inwards, further opening the wound on Jaguar’s throat.
Ghost’s hands flexed around the pistol as he adjusted his grip. “Last chance.” He said, in a voice that could’ve made ice run through anyone’s veins.
“Fuck you.” The soldier stated, pressing the knife deeper.
Ghost’s voice was completely devoid of emotion. “You’ve made your choice.” He fired a single shot, causing the sound to ring through the surrounding walls.
As soon as the bullet connected with the enemy soldier, both he and Jaguar dropped to the ground. Jaguar fell to her hands and knees, coughing slightly as blood dripped from the knife wound.
“Fuck.” Simon said, the edge in his voice softening. “Artemis. You’re going to be okay. I’ve got you.”
He pulls her close, helping her grab kerlix and saline from her med kit to flush and bandage the wound on her throat.
“This will sting.” He warns as he cleans her throat. “Hold still, okay?”
She nods silently as he tends to her, a stray tear making its way down her face.
“Did he hurt you anywhere else?” He asks her gently, ignoring the cooling body lying on the floor not too far from them. He began to check her over, gently tending to her. “Does anything else hurt?” He asks softly.
“No, it was just the knife.” She answers.
He nods. “Don’t worry, we’ll get through this.” Simon promises.
“Alright, you should be good for now. Let me know if you start getting lightheaded.” He says as he finishes bandaging her.
Artemis gives him a soft smile. “You might just replace me as the medic.”
“Never.” He replies, a small smile forming under his mask. “Just breathe, you’re okay.” He opens a water bottle and hands it to her.
“We need to meet up with the rest of the team.” She says as she takes a few careful sips of the water.
Ghost nodded. “I agree.” He looked around the room as he put the medical supplies away. “Can you stand?”
“I’m okay.” Jaguar nods. “Just a little shaken.”
Ghost nods again, taking her arm. “It’s not every day you have a knife held to your throat.” He helped Jaguar to her feet, supporting her by the waist as she stood back up. “Just take it slow and steady.”
“Yeah.” She says quietly.
Ghost’s gaze was steady as they prepared to move forward. He glanced behind them, seeing the soldier he’d killed, lying face down in a pool of his own blood.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner.” His voice is quiet, laced with guilt. “If I had been here sooner, then…” He trails off. “I hope you can forgive me.”
“It’s my fault.” Jaguar shakes her head. “I didn’t clear the room fast enough, and he cornered me.”
“Don’t blame yourself. We both made mistakes, but we’re both here. That’s what matters.” He looks down at her, placing a hand under her chin before pressing a kiss to the top of her head through his mask. “Come on, let’s get back to the others.”
As they approach to meet up with the rest of the team, Soap’s eyes widen when he sees the bandages around Jaguar’s throat. “What happened?” He asks.
Ghost looks between Jaguar and Soap. “A little misunderstanding with a knife. She’s fine now.”
He looked back at Jaguar, keeping a close eye on her. She was tough, but everyone has a limit. Simon just hopes she’ll be okay.
“Bastard cornered me.” Jaguar explains. “But I guess my scream carried far enough, Ghost heard me.”
“I wish I had been faster.” Simon says softly to her, a note of sadness in his eyes. “Are you okay?”
“I’m okay.” She confirms, gently tugging a strap on Simon’s vest. “I’m okay.”
Simon caught the tug, looking down at her hands. “Is something wrong?” He asks, voice gentle as he lets her tug the strap.
“No, just fidgeting.” Artemis says, shaking her head.
“If you say so.” Ghost replied. His eyes were soft as he looked at her. He placed a finger under her chin, tilting her head up to look at him. “Are you ready to finish the objective?”
“Yeah, let’s finish this.” Jaguar said firmly, looking him in the eye.
Ghost nodded, steeling his nerves before turning back to the rest of the Task Force. “We’ve made it this far, we’re almost there. Let’s get this done.”
As they approached the exit, he spoke up. “Everyone stay alert. We still have enemies out here.”
They finished the rest of the mission with no issues, finding a few more key pieces of intel before crashing the enemy servers.
As soon as the mission was declared completed, they started the exfil process. Jaguar went back and forth between the soldiers, attending to any wounds they acquired throughout the mission. Ghost kept an eye on her, letting out a sigh of relief when exfil came.
He had been suppressing his emotions the entire mission, and was reaching a point where he wouldn’t be able to for much longer.
One the way back to base, Simon sat next to Artemis, trying to gauge how she was doing. “Are you alright?” He asked softly.
“I’m okay.” She nods.
“Good, I’m glad.” He says, a small smile crossing his face.
When they arrive back to base, Jaguar grabs her med kit in preparation for debriefing before heading to the med bay to restock and help with any casualties.
“Jaguar, wait.” Ghost calls to her. “I’ll come find you when you’re done and walk you back to the barracks.”
“Alright.” She smiles gently at him.
When Artemis was done in the med bay, Simon was waiting for her just outside, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest.
He held out his arm for her to take, and they started walking over to the barracks together. “Stay close, okay?” He said. Simon had something important to tell her, but he wanted to make sure they were alone before saying anything.
“Okay.” She said, wrapping her hands around his outstretched arm.
Simon looked around before opening the door to his barracks room, gently closing the door behind them, sliding his mask off as he does so.
“There’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you, Artemis.” He started quietly, avoiding eye contact as he spoke. It was obvious he was a little uncomfortable with what he wanted to say, but he pressed onward.
He cleared his throat before continuing. “I care about you…a lot. In a way I’ve never felt about anyone before…I…I love you.”
Her eyes widen in surprise, but a smile crosses her face, a faint blush accompanying the smile. “You…you love me?”
His eyes meet hers for the first time since he started speaking. He nodded once, holding eye contact. “You heard right.” He smiled. “I love you.”
Simon knew he hadn’t been this emotionally vulnerable in a long time. He had never admitted feelings like this before, much less out loud to someone else. But he knew he needed to tell her, especially after what had happened today.
“I love you too.” She replied softly as she carefully wound her arms around him, being mindful of the bandages on her throat.
Simon wrapped his arms gently around her, pulling her into a strong, secure hug.
He kissed the top of her head, a wide smile splitting his face. “You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to tell you that.” He whispers.
“Probably about as long as I’ve been wanting to tell you.” She giggles softly.
He let out an emotionally charged sigh, before laughing. “Then we’re both a pair of idiots, aren’t we?”
It was amazing how quickly things could go from horrible to perfect.
“Maybe.” She laughs as well. “But that makes me your idiot.”
Simon let out another amused laugh, before pulling away slightly so he could press his lips to hers. “Well then maybe I’m your idiot too.” He smiles into the kiss, his arms tightening around Artemis slightly.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
reset my patient violence along both lines of a pathway higher
Ghost is entering the base gym at 3 AM when he hears a solid thump, followed by a grunt and swearing coming from the obstacle course area.
"Fuck!... Fuck this…!"
Ghost stops in his tracks, looking over the area, confused. He decides to investigate the sound, thinking either someone's in trouble, or there's someone who isn't supposed to be there. He slowly makes his way to the obstacle training course.
"What in the bloody hell was that?" He whispered to himself under his breath.
As he approaches closer, he sees that it's Artemis, Task Force 141's medic.
"Fuck this! How the hell am I gonna keep up with them?!" She grumbles, unaware of Ghost's presence.
Simon freezes upon realizing who it is, the freezing overcome by surprise when he connects that it's Artemis, and that it's 3 AM.
'What is she doing here?' He thinks to himself. He slides his mask off, waiting to see if she'll notice him standing there.
"Arrrggghhh!" She groans as she kicks one of the obstacles. "I'm never gonna fucking get it!!"
His lips curl into a smile, he's trying not to laugh as he's watching her.
"Artemis?" Simon asks, trying to get her attention. Has she still not seen him?
She turns around at the sound of her name. "Simon!... I… I didn't think anyone else would be here at this hour. What are you doing up?" Her eyes are wide, and her face flushes, mildly embarrassed at getting caught.
He smiles, walking up to her. "I couldn't sleep. What are you doing here, anyway?" He asks as he comes to a stop in front of her.
He's slightly curious, but he doesn't want to push her because something doesn't add up. Her eyes are wide, like she's been caught, which she has. It's 3 AM for God's sake. But, he can't make assumptions.
"Umm…" She stutters, embarrassed at the situation. "I've been trying to work more on the obstacle course, because I feel like I can't keep up with the team on the field… I… I just need more training… But… It's embarrassing to do it when others are watching…"
Simon's eyebrows furrow in thought. "It's barely past 3 AM, shouldn't you be sleeping? It's a good thing you're taking the initiative, but shouldn't a full night's sleep be more important? You need it if you wanna be at 100% for your duties when the time comes." He says, trying not to sound like he's talking down to her, but more like he actually cares about her well-being. He's a little worried if he's being honest.
"Yes, but… I just… I worry about being the weak link… I know my primary job is being the team's medic, but I don't want people to have to worry about me on the field… y'know?" She tries to explain.
Simon nods, understanding her reasoning. She doesn't want to be the weak link, and she wants to be prepared. Makes sense. Everyone has to be on the top of their game when the Task Force works together. "I see your point, but I can assure you, love, no one thinks you're the weak link. We're all a team here, we all care about each other. It's okay, we're not going to let anything happen to you, alright? That includes during missions, we'll keep you safe. I'll keep you safe." He says, trying to lift her spirits.
"Alright," Artemis sniffles. "Sorry for bothering you."
Simon shakes his head. "You aren't bothering me. I'm glad you care enough and are motivated enough to try. I truly appreciate it." He says, smiling softly.
"I'd prefer it if you kept to a normal sleep schedule though. I don't want you to burn yourself out." He adds, gently taking her hand and squeezing it. He just doesn't want her to push herself too hard.
Artemis nods, squeezing his hand back, and taking a step closer to him.
He wraps his arms around her shoulders. She needed this, and he knew it.
"How about you stop for tonight… You've done plenty to prove yourself, right? I mean, you've just ran the course a dozen times on your own. You're clearly prepared." He says gently.
"How...how did you know I've run it a dozen times? How long have you been standing there?" She whispers curiously.
His brows furrow, thinking. "I uh… I've been watching… I guess." He says, sounding rather guilty. "Only to make sure you were okay. I didn't want to interrupt. I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable.” He says, looking a bit worried.
“No, sweetheart, you never make me uncomfortable.” Artemis says, as she leans her head on Simon’s shoulder.
He chuckled softly, feeling relief at knowing that him observing her didn’t make her uncomfortable. “Alright, well, let’s go get you some rest, yeah? You need it. That’s a lot of training.” He says, hugging her tighter.
“Okay.” She yawns.
Her yawning signals that she really is tired, and that it’s definitely a good idea for her to go sleep. Simons nods, leading them to her barracks room.
“Did anyone notice you come out here?” He asks, holding her hand as they walked down the hall.
“I don’t think so. I’ve…been sneaking to the training room the past couple of nights…and I don’t think anyone has noticed…” She says hesitantly.
Simon turns to her, a look of shock across his face. ‘She’s been doing this for multiple nights?!’ “You’ve been sneaking to the training room? For multiple nights?! Artemis!!” Simon whisper-yells at her, shocked that tonight wasn’t the first time she’d been doing this.
This was incredibly unsafe to be doing, especially alone. Sleep deprivation combined with intense training could be a recipe for disaster.
“Why didn't you tell me, or anyone else?” Simon asked, notes of concern sounding in his voice.
Artemis’ eyes started to water at Simon’s raised tone. “Because I need to be better…” She says in a small voice.
He sighs, feeling mildly upset. He didn't want her to be upset. He wrapped his arms around her, trying to provide some comfort. “Oh sweetheart, you are good enough…” He says, rubbing gentle circles into her back. “But you’re pushing yourself too hard.”
He hates seeing her cry, he hates seeing her cry and watching her feel like she isn’t worthy, even though she absolutely is.
“Come on, try to get some sleep. Later we can talk, I’ll make you hot chocolate, the way you like it, and you can tell me more about what’s worrying you. For now, try to get some rest.” He offers softly.
“Ok.” Artemis sniffles. “I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize, love. I understand.” Simon whispers, as he presses a firm kiss to her head. “You’ll be okay. I promise.”
A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated!
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