medieval squire

trying my best

[medievalsquire]

my knight insists he can sense evil but so far this ability mostly applies to beautiful women who are courting the prince and nicer than average innkeepers

[medievalsquire]

medieval calendar really needs a patch. there are simply too many saint days

[medievalsquire]

why does every noble family have a weird little creature on their banner. what does the badger have to do with anything

[medievalsquire]

bitches love me for my hapless charm and anxious nature

[medievalsquire]

my knight is putting on his sluttiest fit for a night out on the town (full plate armor, burgonet helm, houppelande)

[medievalsquire]

stop naming taverns "the sleeping ___". WAKE EM UP

[medievalsquire]

i don't care whose bloodline is more ancient. whose crops are growing. whose surviving the plague

[medievalsquire]

i support women's rights but more importantly women's wrongs. shoutout to the hedge witch who cursed the tax collector

[medievalsquire]

i don't think it's healthy for children to be this involved in succession crises

[medievalsquire]

i think some of you are just becoming knights for the aesthetic :/

[medievalsquire]

ENOUGH with the prophecies. try making a schedule instead

[medievalsquire]

if the kingdom spent half as much money fixing roads as it does funding jousting tournaments we'd all be happier

[medievalsquire]

whoever invented porridge was clearly giving up

[medievalsquire]

found a coin on the ground. today's looking up!

[medievalsquire]

if i ever become king my first decree will be mandatory benches

[medievalsquire]

one of the castle cats has been excommunicated. nobody will explain why

[medievalsquire]

the stablemaster knows every horse in the city by name but still only refers to me as "boy"

[nyx-n1ghtsh4d3]

Because you aren't a horse stablemasters can only learn horses names it's a curse placed on the job by a sorcerer long ago.

[medievalsquire]

fuckkkkkkk i wished on a malicious genie that the stablemaster would remember my name