#squireposting

[medievalsquire]

my knight keeps saying fuck it we ball before charging into battles and it's reallynot inspiring confidence in my heart

[ser-william-the-third]

It’s 10 o’clock. Do you know where your squires are?

[margarettherelentless]

Please let the Tiny Squire get across your screen, his Knight needs that sword.

[graceless-squire]

Announcement horn*

You're listening to

*Sword sharpening SFX*

102.3

*Yelp of surprise*

Real Squire FM

*Parry Sound*

"W-Wha-?!"

Where we play nothing but songs of our Knight's accomplishments.

*The sound of the Squire falling over* "Ow"

This isn't your Knight's Statio- Oh, Ser Knight! How can I-

*The Squire is loudly cut off as Imagine Dragons - Radioactive starts playing*

[dungeonsanddrow]

forget dating apps I’m going to stand in the middle of the joust field looking lost until a knight gives me their helm and sword to take back to camp

[cafandnaps]

My knight could totally beat- beat off- no- beat of- no! Beat up your knight. Shtt fuck. Sir I’m sorry I did it wrong he’s drawing his blade

[squireutations]

ignore the suspiciously rhythmic clanking coming from the jousting champion's tent please. its fine. the squire is probably trying to get the dented chausses off. nothing to see here

[basicbascinet]

Little known fact: much like cats, some squires instinctively freeze if you hold them by the back of the neck.