HydieMurderBabe on AO3

Two traumatized nubbins heal from their pasts. Lots of sex and violence ensues.

[meeshrox]

Hi, I’m Meesh (she/her). I have been writing fiction for over a year, although my writing career began in academia more than two decades ago (yes, I'm old, like 40+ old). The majority of what I post and reblog is BG3 but I occasionally share socialist, anti fascist, and lgbtqia+ information.

If you’re here, that probably means you found me through BG3-adjacent content. I know we all have our own headcanons. Please be respectful of others’ opinions.

This is a safe space for everyone no matter your gender, who you love, what you do for a living, or how you choose to live. Just make sure you’re not hurting anyone and we’re square.

18+ only please, minors DNI. I write explicit and mature themes and they are intended for an adult audience.

I do my best to tag my work with the most appropriate warnings. Please heed them and let me know if you feel I missed one. I’ll do my best to correct my mistake if I feel that it fits the situation.

Comments and reblogs are welcome. Thank you so much for reading and interacting. I cherish every one of you!

Two traumatized nubbins heal from their pasts. Lots of sex and violence ensues.

All It Cost Me is a post-game longfic with lore-accurate details weaved throughout. I spend a lot of energy researching the world of Faerun to make sure I get the details right. That being said, some of what I create to fill the gaps is homebrew. But I only do this when there isn’t defined lore in its place.

Hydie is a redeemed durge who managed to save herself, her love, and the world within a few days’ time. Despite all the heroics, she had never felt less sure of her abilities than the days after the fall of the Netherbrain. All It Cost Me picks up a couple months after that time. As the world around her was beginning to finally reestablish itself, hers suddenly became unsettled again.

Her last promise to Astarion, made only one day after they ended the Grand Design, was to give him the sun again. She knew it wouldn’t be easy. What she didn’t realize was that other enemies were lying in wait for their revenge.

All It Cost Me is fully outlined. I release a chapter every two weeks. I have at least four drafted in my backlog in case life takes over for a while. At the current pace, I estimate it will take another year to post.

“We’ve come this far. It would hardly do to fail now.” - Astarion Ancunin

To Find Your Heart I was given a writing prompt in the form of a sexy gif. What I wrote was an AU one-shot about Astarion, who lost his unnamed Tav/Durge after the Netherbrain. He was doomed to roam the Realms alone, resolved to never fall in love again. To Find Your Heart is set in modern times, the 90’s punk scene in Paris, to be exact. Please read the tags before proceeding. The pairing is a bit different but still totally canon-compliant!

How to Be Trained by Your Dragon (Love and Deepspace) What if you–and Sylus–were bold enough to explore the what-ifs after your naughty dream? This takes place during the No Defense Zone memory, which I think is early on in the relationship. MC trusts him enough to fall asleep on his couch but probably isn’t ready for the full ride, so to speak. Anyway, the brainworms conspired with the horny ghost and this one-shot was born.

Mind Over Antimatter (Love and Deepspace) Sylus is injured by weapons you’ve encountered before. EVER seems to have improved their antimatter weapons since you first saw them during the Zoion Hunt. The bleeding seems to have stopped and this last bandage isn’t soaked through with crimson yet. As you tend to his wounds, you try to think of a way to ease his pain.

Welcome Inside I’m still drafting this one-shot for one of my dearest friends. She requested a specific character to pair with one of All It Cost Me’s antagonists. The timing of this story will take place after Chapter 4 of All It Cost Me. I’m sure I’ll post it eventually; I keep chipping away at it every few weeks.

Missing Pieces This one-shot will likely be a two- or three-shot by the feel of it. I wanted to dig deeper into Hydie’s characterization so I began writing about one of her first nights post-nautiloid. The timing is that incredibly chaotic few days when she began hearing the durge voices.

I post WIP snips, tag game responses, and other fun stuff here on Tumblr and my standalone works on Ao3.

When I decide to share links to my other social profiles, I'll add them here.

[crimson--soul]

📜 Bhāvāchākrā: The Foundational Lore

Many folks unfamiliar with Asian mythologies have expressed confusion regarding the addition of another LI. Truth be told, the existence of 6 LIs was part of the narrative’s design from the very beginning. This is because the story’s foundational lore is deeply rooted in Vedic and Buddhist traditions. And numerous elements of it’s worldbuilding, symbolisms, and structure draw inspiration from these scriptural and philosophical sources.

“Love And Deepspace” is a story about the perpetual cycle of संसार (Saṃsāra). As the MC, we are trapped within the cycle of never-ending suffering across countless lifetimes and timelines. Our journey is to break free from this eternal cycle, and transcend the suffering that binds us to it. The LIs are not merely romantic interests, but essential companions in that pursuit.

Each of them carries a unique connection to the MC across time, and each plays a vital role in guiding her towards the resolution of this long-standing Kārmic entanglement. It is precisely for this reason that all of them exist within the current timeline simultaneously. Their presence is neither arbitrary, nor accidental. It is a fundamental part of the narrative’s deeper mythological and philosophical framework.

To understand the purpose of the LIs, one must first understand the cycle of Saṃsāra: भवचक्र (Bhāvāchākrā). This cycle of existence which encompasses birth, suffering, death, and rebirth is divided into 6 Realms where sentient beings reside in. Each of these Realms is intrinsically linked to one of the LIs featured in the game —

🔥 Rafayel: देवलोक (Devālokā)

God Realm of pleasure and pride

🏹 Zayne: असुरलोक (Asurālokā)

Demi-God Realm of jealousy and strife

🗡️ Xavier: मनुष्यलोक (Mānuṣhyalokā)

Human Realm of opportunity and enlightenment

🌕 Valko: पशुलोक (Pāśhulokā)

Animal Realm of instinct, fear, and servitude

🩸 Sylus: निर्ऋतिलोक (Nirṛtilokā)

Underworld Realm of chaos and decay

🪷 Caleb: प्रेतलोक (Pretālokā)

Hungry-Ghost Realm of endless insatiable hunger

As we know, each LI possesses unique abilities and latent potential beyond their Evols, granting them the power to create, shape, preserve, or dismantle whatever they deem necessary. The intricate Strings of Fate connecting the LIs to MC was deliberately woven by CosmicMC Herself.

It’s purpose was to ensure that Her vessel on Earth could draw upon Her true power through all 6 Realms, with the aid of every LI. Only by uniting these connections can She access the fullness of Her divine potential, and ultimately shatter the endless cycle of anguish that has bound Her across countless lifetimes.

Needless to say, it is unlikely that any additional LIs will be introduced to the game. With Valko’s arrival, the narrative now possesses all the pieces it was designed to have from the very beginning, allowing the story to finally move forward.

[⚠️ Please note: There are numerous realms of the Underworld described throughout Vedic scriptures. I chose to highlight the one that appears most relevant to Sylus’s storyline. Pretāloka is another such realm, and it has connections to Caleb’s narrative. If anyone is interested in Vedic mythology and would like to learn more about these realms beyond the context of the game, please feel free to ask. I would be delighted to share and discuss them further. 🤍]

🔖 I would also like to add that primordial cosmic entities, such as Gods, are not beings who concern themselves with the opinions or expectations of mortals. In that regard, CosmicMC is no different. Much of what has transpired throughout the narrative can be viewed as the manifestation of Her own will, unfolding according to a design far beyond mortal comprehension, much like the whims of Deities within the real world. To truly appreciate the lore presented in this game, one must approach it through a non-Abrahamic lens. And remain receptive towards Vedic and Pagan beliefs, philosophies, and cultural traditions.

[pankendev]

there are places in the world today that are experiencing 40°C for the first time in recorded history. of course there's no way to know whether chucking billionaires into volcanos will appease the sun god but i feel we're doing the scientific method a disservice if we don't at least try

[hthrrloooo]

Catastrophize Benedictine

[meeshrox]

Mind Over Antimatter

After an eternity in my drafts, this one shot finally sees the light of day! My poor MC was in a state of perpetual fellatio until I finished this scene, which doesn't sound all that bad to be honest. But now that she's free, you are invited to read about her triumph!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/87277311

[meeshrox]

My Two Lil Goobers and Their Two Cups

I am so happy to share my artwork as part of the @bg3-fate-spins-along BG3 Tarot Themed Event!

I chose the two of cups as a nod to Hydie and Astarion finding out they are thiramin. Although the card represents harmonious relationships, proposals and marriage, and loving partnerships, I took this a step further to highlight their goofy nature during domestic life.

Thank you to the organizers of the BG3 Tarot Themed Event! Please consider visiting their page to check out the materials posted by the talented artists, writers, and other creatives for the event.

[enki2]

[meeshrox]

All It Cost Me - Chapter 39 - The Feeling is Mutual

Wow, over 7 months later. I can't believe it's been so long, not that the time flew by lol. But here we are.

I hope the 9k+ and nsfw comm (in the end notes) make the time I spent away worth the wait. If nothing else, it's a bonus to say "WE ARE BACK" in a big way.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/54302575/chapters/230426666

This might be a last call, so to speak. I haven't decided yet, but posting these notifs is a bit stressful after I've already formatted and posted the chapter. I might stop making these Tumblr posts going forward. If you would like to be sure you are notified when a chapter posts, please subscribe to the fic on ao3.

[fairycosmos]

fucked that you can’t fix other people especially when you really care about them. Oh so im just supposed to be there for you while you suffer. like a useless cunt gargoyle

[meeshrox]

WIP Whenever (and a special update)

Thank you for the WIP tags, my lovely @unovafarm, @loserscardigan, and @roguishcat!!

I have something in the works, but I don't want to spoil any of it. Just know that Hydie and Astarion are soon to be back in a BIG way so stay tuned!

...and counting (still in drafting phase)

[skeletonclaw]

[scissorsaint]

you really do meet some of the loveliest people talking about blood and sex on the internet

[dragonsblowingoutbirthdaycandles]

your life is not an optimization problem

[dragonsblowingoutbirthdaycandles]

as in you'll never achieve the perfect daily routine, sleep schedule, coping mechanisms, mannerisms, fashion sense etc. even after years and years of healing and improvement and self-discovery. you will never be so good at life that you manage to utilize every waking moment. its great to be productive and all but sometimes you'll suck ass. sometimes you'll take eight hours to be done with a twenty minute job. you'll prioritize the wrong thing. you'll sleep for 12 hrs just to avoid being awake. you'll relapse. and you'll relapse again. you'll forget to turn in the assignment. you'll order too little food. life is far too large and complex for you to even experience it completely, much less try to make sense of and control it. you can't. please give up on that and be at peace with the hours you lose. they are not separate from your life.

[depsidase]

[depsidase]

[going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi]

re my "read books that make you feel stupid" post: reading books you don't fully understand is probably the safest way to push yourself outside your comfort zone. you don't have to embarrass yourself in front of anyone. you can do it from your cozy bed. you can easily get help from book clubs or literary analysis online. you can go as slowly as you want. there's literally no risk.

[depsidase]