it's not as easy as you'd think.

~ Shauna Shipman is the most normal woman in all of New Jersey - nay, the tristate area. She has a daughter and a husband who definitely isn't in money trouble with, what, the mafia or something? She's never killed anyone. Not recently, either.

[meganonmain]

i know i took this time off to sleep/rest but i am getting mad at myself for sleeping/resting during this time off.

[meganonmain]

turns out it's not work that makes cooking/doing things hard. it's the disability!

[meganonmain]

reading about how lestat and armand are both victims of grooming and their relationship to desire and sex is their perceived value and im just like haha... good thing that doesn't happen in REAL LFIE to anyone....

[meganonmain]

i already feel like im wasting my vacation and its been 1. single. day.

[meganonmain]

the biggest prank i play on myself is thinking my loneliness is unique and then reinforcing it by not talking to anyone about it

[meganonmain]

you can tell when I'm losing it bc I start posting on main 🤪🫠🙃

[meganonmain]

i feel like this week i am just going to need time to lose my shit. i want to keep myself busy and scheduled and functioning but everything has been feeling really amplified lately, and i think i've been ignoring some of my emotions while i've been focused on trying do well in managing my emotions instead of feeling them.

maybe with the time off i can do some painting, i did some drawing earlier today with a friend and that was nice.

i've been so focused on making it through the day for so much of my time lately that i've really really been disconnected from myself. the problem is i don't know how much i can address (feelings-wise) before i begin to spiral, which is always in the back of my mind when shelving anything away.

this is why my therapist shouldnt go on vacation lmfao

[meganonmain]

i've been having a rough few weeks and while i'm glad i will have a whole week to not do things, i am also keenly aware that i need to do a lot of things and i worry i'm not going to get any of them done.

because we don't have a microwave, i have been having a hard time making/preparing myself food. usually i reheat food in the microwave and then toss it over rice but i've been having to double-cook the food which feels like a lot more effort, and on office days i have such low energy to begin with. i'm worried i haven't been eating enough but i also don't feel hungry unless i'm Very hungry because my body is just neglecting to tell me things, so i started drinking these protein drinks and eating cereal to ensure im getting the right vitamins because i have vitamin deficiencies that are leading to my fatigue in the first place.

thankfully i no longer have to pay rent and a half but my rent still does cost more than before by a not insignificant amount, and it's doctor appointment season (all the annuals, follow up for my derm, so much fun) which is good to do when i'm about to hit my deductible i guess?

i feel like my conditioning of fierce independence and keeping quiet because i always feared being seen as a distraction or a nuisance has been very challenging to navigate lately, especially when i had that breakdown at work.

i hope this time off helps me reset. i hope i don't beat myself up over not doing time off correctly!

[meganonmain]

been having a very strange past couple of weeks so I'm glad I'm "on vacation" next week so I can just chill

[meganonmain]

Can't be too mad at the bus being late bc I got some quality time in with my favorite shop cat. The guys there had her come out from the back to see me and she let me give her belly rubs after she circled in my lap for a bit!

[meganonmain]

someone started talking with me at the party and then when my friend came back they said to her: oh I follow you on blue sky by tbe way

damn i am truly never escaping the sidekick allegations

[meganonmain]

before I can do things I must do list

[meganonmain]

feeling very mature by not obsessing over a potential date (I'm kinda obsessing)

[meganonmain]

Item: Headphones Rarity: ⏶ Common

Name a video game song you still have stuck in your head.

Feed your dashboard by answering my question, blogger.

Always the island music from ACNL

[meganonmain]

Telling my loved ones happy tdov and then getting it back leave my gender questioning ALONE

[debylloyd]

DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO BE LOVED BY DEATH?

[strwbryslut]

NEVER KILL YOURSELF . SOMETHING LESBIAN MIGHT HAPPEN TO YOU SOON .

[strwbryslut]

the traction this post received is insane …… ANYWAY MY AFFIRMATION FOR 2026 . GOOD LESBIAN THINGS WILL HAPPEN TO ME