https://archiveofourown.org/works/78169721
Title: The Complexities of Arranging a Rendez-Vous
The Stanley Parable, Stanarrator
“Let’s see… dates.” The Narrator does a quick mental scan on the world wide web, making sure he doesn’t forget anything when conveying information to his pupil. “A date. An appointment to meet at a specific time, and more specifically, a social engagement between two persons, often of a romantic character.”
‘Are you seriously giving me the dictionary definition you are so weird-’
“Common types of dates,” the Narrator barrels on, “involve having dinner at a restaurant, or watching a movie. A so-called ‘dinner date’ is a setting that lends itself especially well to getting to know your partner through conversation, whereas the more intimate setting of a movie theater is better for… er, for snuggling.”
Stanley smirks and wiggles his eyebrows. Starts thinking some very appreciative thoughts at the concept of snuggling.
Or: Stanley wants to go on a date, and the Narrator continuously questions his taste in men.
Stanley’s expression softens. ‘No wait, I’m sorry. I love this setting. Don’t go.’
“You’re just saying that to get in my good graces,” the Narrator grumbles, making his voice sound every bit like someone crossing their arms and turning their back.
‘No, I like the… candles.’ Stanley decisively plucks one of the candles from the candelabra and starts bringing it to his mouth, almost like he intends to-
“Do NOT eat that! Wax is inedible!”
Stanley pauses, stares at the burning stick in his hand. ‘Isn’t it just code?’
Chomp. Munch munch munch.
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