&& LYING IS EASY.

 lito rodriguez of sense8   selective. private. loved by hime.

[mentiiroso-blog]

i’m super sorry i haven’t been around on this blog. life has been really hard lately and lito has kind of been sleeping as a result. but he’ll be coming back soon, i think. just be patient, thank you!!

[mentiiroso-blog]

HERNANDO

     A small sigh drifted from him. “Do you truly think that, just because you are gay, you are undeserving of great movies and the love of your fans?” Hernando tsked at him. “Lito… think of the time when you were rising to where you are now. Think of the fame you have enjoyed, the adoring fans you had before they knew you preferred men. How have you changed, that you no longer deserve all that?”

            “Ay, NO, Hernando. That... that is not              what I MEANT.”

He sighed as well, hands moving to REST on his lover’s hips. Oh, how he ADORED this man. What in the WORLD would he do without him?

             “It is only that... perhaps I had gotten              too COMFORTABLE. Relied TOO MUCH              on that everyone already knew who I was.              That they all LOVED me. Perhaps I NEVER              deserved what I had, and it is only now that              people are starting to SEE that...” 

[mentiiroso-blog]

HERNANDO

          “Let them try, Lito.” Hernando closes the already minute distance between them, settling easily between the outstretched hands. “They can try and pull me from you, they can try to pull you from me, but we won’t let them.” There’s nothing they can take away from either of them anymore, nothing that will force them apart. “You are nervous,” Hernando says gently, “and that’s okay.”

He had MEANT it playfully, or at least he’d THOUGHT he had. But as Hernando spoke, Lito REALIZED that he was right. Even just going for a WALK with his lover, just heading to the store to pick up another BOTTLE... that in itself was far more nerve-wrecking than ANY audition he’d had in his life.

                “I... I do not MEAN to be.”

He wanted to be STRONG, to be confident. The others in his cluster had gone through FAR worse, in his mind, than what he’d had to deal with. So WHY, then, was it still so TERRIFYING?

                “Ay... I am being FOOLISH. Come on. Let’s                  go. I HAVE to do this.”

One step at a time, RIGHT? 

[mentiiroso-blog]

WOLFGANG

At Lito’s response, Wolfgang’s lips CURL in a near-smile, mostly grimace. “I’m not afraid of death. It’s all the in-between shit that gets to me.”

He is in Lito’s world right now–the warm sand and the hiss of the ocean make for much better scenery than Wolfgang’s current location: the laboratory, the stinging smell of iodine, the taste of his own blood. 

They’re SAFE here, for a moment. Wolfgang has slipped through the sensate veil where the Whispers can’t track him…but he won’t be able to keep this up for long. He looks out at the ocean and then says: “I need a favor. I need you to call someone. Tell him I’m okay.”

Felix is going to get himself killed hunting for Wolfgang otherwise.

Wolfgang may NOT have been afraid of death, but Lito WAS. Not just of his own death, either. Of the death of ANY of the sensates in his cluster... and of HERNANDO, too. 

That would be far WORSE than anything he could imagine.

Once his GREATEST fear had been being forgotten, being nothing more than a WASHED UP has-been. But things had CHANGED. The stakes had gotten so much HIGHER.

                 “Of COURSE. Anyone.”

It didn’t take but a MOMENT for Lito to know who Wolfgang meant. He pulled his phone out of his POCKET and handed it to Wolfgang so he could key the number in. 

He KNEW Wolfgang would do the same for him, were their situations reversed.

                 “... what should I TELL him, exactly?                   WHO should I say that I am?”

He could EASILY come up with any old lie on the spot, but this was IMPORTANT, and he wanted to handle it carefully, SENSITIVELY. Wolfgang deserved to have a say in this. Surely he had control of LITTLE else in his life, now.

[hoperesideswithinthismess]

[sleepydollie]

in my defense, i was left unattended

[mentiiroso-blog]

WOLFGANG

“Good.” Wolfgang handed him the bottle, still feeling the smooth glass in his own hand as he finally let Lito leave the car.

“You disarm them figuratively, I’ll disarm them literally.” He reminded the other man as he walked beside him up to the group of men that had backed Hernando into the corner of the parking garage that led up to the apartment complex. He could commend the man there, that he was somewhat calm at least outwardly when the men surrounding him were beginning to close in, looking less and less patient with whatever it was he was saying.

“Now’s your time. You do what you do, I’ll hand the rest.”

Now THIS was something that Lito actually knew how to do. The pressure was far GREATER than it was while simply on a movie set, but even STILL he was in his element. With the bottle in hand, he STUMBLED along, a broad grin on his lips as he approached the men. 

He walked RIGHT into one of them, then started to laugh, as if this was all just TOO funny.

                   “Pardon ME, gentlemen. But I seem to                     have LOST my champagne bottle! Do                     you know WHERE it has gone?”

Then he looked down at his hand, one of which still HELD the bottle in question, while the men stared at him QUIZZICALLY.

                    “Ah... THERE it is-- Wolfgang, NOW.”

[mentiiroso-blog]

HERNANDO

     Hernando’s smile grew wider still as Lito finally spoke the words- shouted them far more convincingly than he had been. Hands still framing his lover’s face, he leaned in to kiss him again. “That was perfect,” he answered. He pressed his forehead to Lito’s and threw his arms around him in a tight hug.

       When he drew back, he searched his face. “Now, tell me you believe it. Because truer words have never been spoken, Lito.” 

To say it was ONE thing-- he was an ACTOR, after all. But to believe it was quite another, and Lito was uncertain that he could SAY such a thing to Hernando and truly MEAN it. 

               “Are you... are you CERTAIN, though,                Hernando? Because, no matter HOW                many times I say it... I still cannot help                but wonder if I’m just LYING to myself.”

He was so VERY good at lying. 

[spctlessminds]

these memes are based on the very lovely blog affectionsuggestion

‘  all i want to do is kiss you breathless  &  watch as your eyes light up when i tell you that you’re my universe.  ’ ‘  concept:  just you  &  me,  driving away from the city.  the windows are down  &  the cold air feels amazing.  our songs are playing  &  we couldn’t be more in love.  ’ ‘  concept:  we are together  &  nothing in the world can bring us down.  ’ ‘  concept:  we listen to showtunes in bed while we eat chinese food under a blanket.  ’ ‘  even when i’m not thinking about you,  i’m still kinda thinking about you.  ’ ‘  every time we talk,  every time we touch,  i feel more  &  more in love with you.  ’ ‘  everything  –  every single thing  –  reminds me of you.  ’ ‘  hearing  ‘ i love you ’  from your side of the bed late at night makes my heart feel like it’s bursting with tiny,  happy spring flowers.  ’ ‘  i can’t stop kissing you  &  i can’t stop thinking about kissing you.  ’ ‘  i can’t stop thinking about you.  i just want to kiss you,  again  &  again  &  again  &  again.  ’ ‘  i can’t wait for the next time i get to kiss you.  ’ ‘  i can’t wait to have hundreds of adventures with you.  ’ ‘  i can’t wait to raise a dog with you.  ’ ‘  i can’t wait to see you again.  it’s only a matter of time before we embrace  &  i feel at home once more.  ’ ‘  i can’t wait until we’re in the same country,  in the same city,  in the same bed  &  under the same blanket.  ’ ‘  i daydream about how your fingers would feel if they were intertwined with mine right now.  ’ ‘  i didn’t believe in soulmates until i met you.  ’ ‘  i don’t want better.  i want you.  ’ ‘  i feel like i could lie wrapped in your arms,  staring at the sky for centuries  &  need nothing else.  ’ ‘  i had a dream that we kissed last night.  ’ ‘  i just need to be in a meadow right now on a warm day,  with you,  the smell of grass  &  flowers around us.  ’ ‘  i just want to be sitting in the sun with you,  not knowing whether the warmth i feel is the pleasant sun or your soft smile warming my heart.   ’ ‘  i just want to make gingerbread houses with you around christmas.  ’ ‘  i just want to wake up in your arms every day.  ’ ‘  i just want you close to me.  ’ ‘  i just want you to sleep well  &  be happy.  ’ ‘  i love everything about you.  ’ ‘  i love how our legs feel entangled with each other.  i crave that feeling.  ’ ‘  i miss you all the time.  i’m never sure how i feel,  but i know i always want you around.  ’ ‘  i miss your soft touch against my skin.  ’ ‘  i need your arms  &  legs around me,  surrounded by your warmth,  holding me tight,  with no intention of letting me go.  ’ ‘  i often wake up thinking about you.  ’ ‘  i stay up until 11:11 every night just to wish you were here with me.  ’ ‘  i think you’re my favorite person in the world right now.  ’ ‘  i want nothing but to make good memories with you.  ’ ‘  i want to be your past,  present,  &  future.  ’ ‘  i want to dance with you while you sing all your favorite songs,   looking lovingly into my eyes  &  meaning every beautiful lyric you sing to me.  ’ ‘  i want to fill a hundred photo albums with memories of adventures with you.  ’ ‘  i want to kiss every single spot on your body that you’re insecure of.  ’ ‘  i want to kiss you each morning  &  each night.  ’ ‘  i want to laugh with you  &  hold your cold hands.  ’ ‘  i want to make a home with you.  the kind of home that lets you feel the love inside of it when you walk in.  it’ll be a safe place for us  &  the people we let into it.  ’ ‘  i want to make chocolate mousse with you  &  then we can eat it together.  ’ ‘  i want to see a whole world of different sunsets with you.  ’ ‘  i want to take a walk in the snow with you.  ’ ‘  i want us to share all of our excitement together.  ’ ‘  i want you to kiss me  &  hold me close while telling me everything is going to be okay.  ’ ‘  i wish you’d just kiss me.  ’ ‘  i would rather listen to your silence when i’m with you than any kind of music on this world.  ’ ‘  if i could gather all the stars in the sky  &  give them to you i would  ’ ‘  if there’s a day where i don’t tell you i love you,  there’s a day i’m not living.  ’ ‘  in my eyes,  you’re a king.  ’ ‘  in my eyes,  you’re a queen.  ’ ‘  it’s been years now.  despite everything,  we are alive  &  we are together  &  we are okay.  ’ ‘  i’d love to snuggle up to you when you want affection most.  ’ ‘  i’m happy you exist.  ’ ‘  i’m so blessed to have met you.  you’ve already got me longing to be in your company constantly.  ’ ‘  i’m so glad i keep you in my life.  your eyes,  your hugs,  you lips,  your words,  &  your smile keep me going every day.  ’ ‘  just the sight of your beautiful smile or the way you say hello is enough to make even my darkest days a little brighter.  ’ ‘  just you in my harms,   laying on my chest;  it’s just us being us  &  i think we are simply meant to be.  ’ ‘  lay on your stomach as i give you sweet kisses on your back  &  neck while i’m feeling your love tingling in my body.  ’ ‘  let’s fight the right wingers  &  make the world a better place.  ’ ‘  let’s go somewhere quiet  &  just be together.  ’ ‘  let’s see everything together…   the whole world.  ’ ‘  let’s sit in the forest together,  the particles in the air reflecting sunlight reminding me of the brightness in your eyes.  ’ ‘  my love for you makes me want to be strong for you.  ’ ‘  now i know the meaning of  ‘ i wouldn’t change you for the world. ’  ’ ‘  now i understand why all my other relationships didn’t work out:  i am meant to be with you.  ’ ‘  now it’s back to counting down the days until i get to feel free again,  until i get to be in your arms again,  until i get to see your radiance face-to-face again.  ’ ‘  nowhere feels as safe as being in your arms.  ’ ‘  one day i won’t be scared to say i love you.  ’ ‘  one day we’ll do everything we dream about together.  ’ ‘  seeing your eyes in the morning sunlight  &  feeling the warmth of your gaze brings upon me makes me realize i’m in love.   ’ ‘  tell me about the things you’re passionate about.  tell me every detail about your favorite things.  i don’t care if it takes all day,  i love you  &  i love to hear you be happy  &  excited about things.  ’ ‘  the thought of your voice  &  the softness of your smile keeps me going when we can’t be together.  i hope you understand you’ve given me a lot of faith  &  happiness when i thought it’d be impossible,  when i thought i didn’t deserve it.  ’ ‘  the way you look at me makes me feel like i’m the most beautiful goddess in the universe.  ’ ‘  there’s nothing i want more than to stay under blankets with you  &  curl up in your lap.  ’ ‘  thinking of you makes me think that maybe it’ll all be okay.  ’ ‘  we’ll celebrate holidays together  &  make our own traditions.  ’ ‘  when i think about you my heart feels funny.  ’ ‘  when i’m with you,  i get a feeling like coming home after a long time away.  ’ ‘  whether you’re blossoming or struggling,  i’ll stay with you.  i’ll keep on loving you.  ’ ‘  you are endlessly,  implausibly fascinating.  ’ ‘  you are like hot chocolate,  you make my insides warm.  ’ ‘  you are more beautiful than my favorite songs.  ’ ‘  you fascinate me.  ’ ‘  you make me feel safe.  ’ ‘  you make me feel how i never thought i could.  ’ ‘  you make me understand lyrics to cheesy love songs.  ’ ‘  you make my heart feel light as a feather yet heavy as bricks all at once.  ’ ‘  you,  my dear,  have the voice of an angel.  ’ ‘  your  ‘ i love you ’  has turned into my favorite lullaby.  ’ ‘  your arms are home to me.  ’ ‘  your eyes make me think about stormy skies in a different way,  your smile makes me blush just thinking about it  &  i think i am totally in love with you.  ’ ‘  your hands are my favorite hands to touch  &  to hold.  ’ ‘  your hands are so warm  &  your hair is so soft  &  i want to touch you forever  &  ever.  ’ ‘  your love for me reminds me to love myself.  ’ ‘  your smile is the most beautiful sight on this earth.  ’ ‘  you’re the highlight of my day.  ’ ‘  you’re the only person who can make me feel this way.  ’

[nxtsoordinary]

💝 GIMME ALL THE KISSES HERNANDO

@mentiiroso  -  send in a ‘💝’ for a random special valentine’s day kiss [ accepting ]#11 - on the hips

Hernando had woke early with the full intention of slipping out of bed to make Lito a big, beautiful Valentine’s Day breakfast in bed. But when he’d rolled over to kiss the lips he loved so much, he’d been caught up for a time in simply watching Lito. The man was handsome, breathtaking- especially in the soft glow of the dawn light. After about twenty minutes of watching his fiance sleep, he couldn’t help himself. He’d a different start to the morning in mind.

Slowly, being careful not to wake the other man just yet, Hernando slid down beneath the covers. His fingertips trailed lightly down his chest, bumping along the hard muscles of his abdomen. He nuzzled against Lito’s lower stomach as his fingertips slipped into the waistband of his underwear to pull them down. Then he found one hip bone which he first grazed his teeth over before pressing a kiss to the warm skin. With a soft hum, he nipped his way across to the other side to kiss that hip bone. His fingers curled around Lito’s muscular thighs and this time, it was with a low growl that he sucked at his lover’s skin.

There could certainly be worse ways to wake on Valentine’s Day.

[mentiiroso-blog]

HERNANDO

     “Ah!” Hernando narrowed his eyes at Lito as the other man protested all the more. He needed him to believe in himself. He had come so far, done so much. And maybe he had lost some fans but so many people still loved him. He loved reading all the good things people had to say on social media about his fiance- and there was a lot of it. Hernando wished Lito would read more of it.

     He waited patiently, watching the man he loved as he worked to convince himself. Smiling when Lito finally repeated him more convincingly, Hernando pulled him in for a peck to his lips. “Good. Say it again. Shout it!”

Lito wondered, at times, whether Hernando KNEW how much he relied on him. Without him, he was a MESS, an utter disaster. Only with Hernando by his side was he able to get THIS far. 

The kiss certainly HELPED his confidence, and he even managed a hint of a SMILE as Hernando instructed him to try again. 

                 “I deserve this. I DESERVE THIS!” 

He LAUGHED, then, almost surprised by his own VOICE. 

                   “How was THAT?” 

[bifelicitys]

Mama?

[mentiiroso-blog]

'jealous' sentence meme

❝ i don't like the way he's/she's looking at you. ❞

❝ i'm starting to think you want him/her, too. ❞

❝ am i crazy? ❞

❝ have i lost ya'? ❞

❝ even thought i know you love me, can't help it. ❞

❝ i turn my chin music up, and i'm puffing my chest. ❞

❝ i'm getting red in the face. ❞

❝ you can call me obsessed. ❞

❝ it's not your fault that they hover. ❞

❝ i mean no disrespect. ❞

❝ it's my right to be hellish. ❞

❝ i still get jealous. ❞

❝ 'cause you're too fucking beautiful. ❞

❝ everybody wants a taste. ❞

❝ everybody wants your sex. ❞

❝ that's why i still get jealous. ❞

❝ i wish you didn't have to post it all. ❞

❝ i wish you'd save a little bit for me. ❞

❝ protective or possessive, yeah. ❞

❝ call it passive or aggressive. ❞

❝ i'm the type to never sweat no chick/guy. ❞

❝ ain't nobody but you got me stressin' this way, you know. ❞

❝ now the struggle's always real. ❞

❝ girls/boys be steppin' in my face. ❞

❝ you're the only one invited. ❞

❝ how am i supposed to feel? ❞

❝ you're the only one invited. ❞

❝ i said there's no one else for you. ❞

❝ 'cause you know i get excited when you get jealous, too. ❞

[mentiiroso-blog]

HERNANDO

     The second the word but passed Lito’s lips, Hernando tsked at him. He needed to do this movie. It would prove to him, and to the rest of the world just how incredible an actor Lito truly was, regardless of his sexual orientation. Hernando didn’t doubt it, either; he was so positive in his heart that this would be good for the man he loved.

     “If you don’t believe in yourself, Lito, then they won’t either. You know how incredible an actor you are. You will walk onto that set like you were born to be there, because you were! You will show them who the real you is, and they will love you, but you have to stop doubting it. You deserve this. Say that. Say ‘I deserve this!’”

He could not HELP but to groan. Hernando was RIGHT, he knew he was. Hernando was ALWAYS right. Such a smart man he was-- Lito often wondered just HOW he’d managed to snag someone so wonderful. Hernando was by FAR the better man in their relationship. 

               “It is not SO EASY, Hernando.”

His head tilted back and his eyes CLOSED. He tried to visualize his FANS, tried to imagine faces SMILING at him rather than SNEERING.

                   “... I deserve this.”

It came out as more of a MUMBLE at first, so he tried again.

                  “I DESERVE this.”

[mentiiroso-blog]

WOLFGANG

“Lito.” Wolfgang stressed his name to get his focus. His hands squeezed firmly into his shoulders to ground him. He understood why the other man couldn’t be as calm in the situation. Truly, he couldn’t blame him, but it was harder to work around that when he needed to work through him. “We won’t let anything happen to him, I promise.”

He twisted around to the backseat, feeling around for the grocery bag, His hand grasped smooth glass. A champagne bottle, of course. He thought about breaking the bottle now, but going in brandishing a weapon might set the men off right away… It seemed they were going to need both of their talents here…

“What if you go in, pretend you don’t understand what’s happening. Let them think you’re drunk maybe? Just get close enough to them with the champagne bottle and I’ll handle the rest.”

Somehow that PROMISE made all the difference. Lito nodded. He TRUSTED Wolfgang. After all they had both been through, they were like FAMILY. 

Funny, how if he’d MET a man like Wolfgang just on the streets of MEXICO, he likely would have RUN in the other direction. But he supposed it PAID to have someone like that on YOUR SIDE.

                 “Pretend to be DRUNK? I... I can DO that.                   Yes... yes, I think that MIGHT just work!”

It was TERRIFYING, but for Hernando, he would do ANYTHING. 

[dianperro]

❤

[mentiiroso-blog]

HERNANDO

          “I am a genius, thank you for agreeing.” There’s a grin and a gentle pat to Lito’s cheeks before he pulls away. He scrutinizes his boyfriend for just a moment, before nodding. “You look gorgeous, baby. Always.” Lito could wear a trash bag out and would still look good –– of course, Hernando would never let Lito out in public dressed like that, but the point still stands. He knows they will be photographed, put up online and in tabloids, so it’s fair for Lito to be worried about his appearance, but Hernando can’t let him fall down that rabbit hole. “Are you ready to go?”

              “Ah, Hernando... you are only SAYING that.”

Of COURSE Lito was well aware that he was handsome. He was named one of the SEXIEST men alive by more than one magazine, after all! But he had to be in the RIGHT outfit, he had to be in the right LIGHTING... 

He pouted just SLIGHTLY, hands reaching out to rest on his lover’s hips. 

               “I suppose I am. If you are SURE I look alright.                Now you... YOU look incredible. I am not sure                if I should even let you OUT like this, someone                might try to STEAL you away~”