[eddiebarnes]

[mib-agentw-rp-deactivated201404]

Can you even believe some of these headlines? I mean, they’re worth checking out but c’mon.

[mib-agent-jay]

'Space aliens put Earth up for sale'-- that one's got great entertainment value.

[batboylives]

[rickflxg]

        I didn’t think B was actually gonna show you that case.. I swear, the things you get yourself into. I think I’ll pass, Jay— I don’t think you and I don’t share the same taste in woman.

       As long as there aren’t any nine-inch long tongues involved I think its worth a look. Where are these supposed abductions taking place, do they match up with any of our earlier reports?

[mib-agent-jay]

       Alright, well I'm just saying-- I don't like to squat in the same pond twice.. but I'm considering going back for seconds.

All the one's I've heard of have been rural disturbances. Farmhouses, acerages. Little old school, pioneer shit like that. But.. get this-- all of the kids that have been 'abducted' so far, we're all adopted. So, I'm figuring this is some kind of alien species coming back to claim the offspring that's rightfully theirs. You following me?

[rickflxg]

       —where in the hell have you been man? I mean, I’m all for coffee breaks and such.. but its been almost two days.

[mib-agent-jay]

       You put me and a girl with a nine-inch long tongue in a room together-- man, 48 hours is not nearly enough. Though, 10 out of 10 would recommend.

Anyways-- that's besides the point. I think I've found a lead on that 'Space Aliens are Stealing our Kids' article.

[formerlyqueenb]

      Her eyes narrowed slightly. Jay knew fully well that she didn’t enjoy any of his nicknames. They were about as useful together as oil and water; she could barely work because of his lack of professionalism and he couldn’t help himself when it came to pushing her buttons. They tended to make a heavily dysfunctional pair. “So you didn’t read about the lady with the nine inch tongue? I would’ve thought that had been all up your alley, Jay.”

[mib-agent-jay]

       Their transactions were about as operative as a debiliated baby deer. Jay was fueled by her heightened responses, and B always attempted to minimize her backlash. "Nine inches?" the senior agent gasped in mock arousal. "I may need a moment alone with myself-- in the privacy of a bathroom stall."

[rickflxg]

      This place has gotten far too quiet— should I be worried?

[mib-agent-jay]

[mib-agent-jay]

[rickflxg]

Right.. and what about them exactly?

I’m gonna regret asking that, aren’t I?

[mib-agent-jay]

Turns out he was just -- drumroll please.. -- gay. And my work here is done. Next case.

Don't ask how I found that one out though-- that is an inquiry that will never be addressed.

[formerlyqueenb]

mib-agent-jay

      { ♕ } I’m not gonna lose my patience with him today. I’m not gonna let him get to me. I’m not. “Jay.” She greeted with a clipped tone. If it wasn’t evident in her voice that she didn’t want to be near him presently, then it was obvious in her sour expression. Some things didn’t need to be said, frankly. “Have you looked at today’s hot sheets?”

[mib-agent-jay]

        {— ☢} Confirmation of B's immediate displeasure with Jay was readily apparent. "Worker Bee." he acknowledged, lowering his head whilst possessing a brief, yet mocking timbre. "Hot sheets?" He wore a look of pseudo-concentration, as if trying to recall. "Maybe you could give me a summary."

[mib-agent-jay]

[rickflxg]

Better to be safe than sorry, right?

Besides, if it ends up being a dead end.. I’m sure we’ll get a few laughs from the eyewitness report.

[mib-agent-jay]

Yeah [chuckles], remember that family who was convinced that an alien had turned their son gay. Because of the whole situation that rhymes with 'bath robe' -- .. ing. Y'know, like --

[rickflxg]

We’re a secret, non-government organization, Jay.. why the hell would we have a union?

—that’s besides the point though, where have you been man? I told you to meet me at Headquarters over a half hour ago.

[mib-agent-jay]

Oh, right-- that. I thought the offer to meet up with you had.. expired?

[mib-agent-jay]

mib-agent-d

       {— ☢} "Is this something we should be looking into?"

[mib-agent-jay]

If anyone's in need of plots, I found this amazing Weekly World News Tumblr page. I love it

http://batboylives.tumblr.com

go check it out

[mib-agent-jay]

       {-- ☢} "I think we're the only people in New York pulling 16 hour shifts. Does this joint even have a workers union?"

[hottguycelebs]