Sanguine

[they/them] the world is a natural muse

[midnightsanguine]

it will always hurt

the reason is not them

but me

the world is hued

in melancholic colours

distrust in

every

footstep

a

stranger

takes

people can be good

yet time has passed

and im too far gone

to go back

because

when you grow up

in a burning home

to burn is all you know

oh to be

seen

loved

understood

[midnightsanguine]

i want to sleep.

a world away from here.

away from me,

my mind,

and the mistakes i always seem to make.

i want to be somewhere,

where no ones knows me.

i could lie,

tell them i moved from out of town

because i like to go where the winds blow.

i could crash on a locals couch.

take a quick break to reminisce

but not to look back and miss.

i am stuck.

in a constant spiral.

apologies trickle from my soul.

blame finds a way to brand me.

it is my fault alone.

in a life a chose to lead so poorly,

i can not point fingers at others.

maybe, i just need to get some rest.

[midnightsanguine]

everytime the sun seems close

to touching the waters surface,

it passes by;

replaced by the moon and the stars.

the staple of ethereal ideal,

but the moon only shines

with the rays of the sun

illuminating it in an uncredited back glow.

hands desire to grab hold of the moon.

to use it's starry sky to wish impossibilities

that will never come to light;

forever enshrouded.

forever decietful.

forever beautiful.

[midnightsanguine]

Graduation

Gratitude at every corner.

Laughing at each turn.

Comfort in simple presence.

Community.

My friends,

my chosen family.

Dawning a cap and gown.

Walking across a stage

into uncertain the future,

Smiling.

Always smiling.

Hugging,

for the last time in high school.

Hugging,

at the start of our lives.

Waving goodbye,

Walking away,

Though never leaving behind;

Those who have shaped my life,

who have made me laugh,

who have always been my dearest friends.

[midnightsanguine]

Dream

The world falls quiet in the gentle slumber of night.

That sound of silence.

A comfortable solitude.

One deep breath offers a break;

escape in the most temporary form.

Laying my head against the pillow.

Feeling the soft sheets against my skin.

Succumbing to a dream;

where the air is cleaner and the sun shines brighter.

I take a rest between trees

and feel the grass blowing in the wind

directly above my head.

This dream,

this reality,

welcomes me with open arms.

[midnightsanguine]

Chapel

a wooden cross

chipped

hanging high in

the door frame

musky carpet smells

of mildew and

floral perfumes

Pews

row

by row

(vacant but inviting)

keys of the piano

note scales

sliding

up

And he

who recalls

such

mundane things

with a fond

longing

heart

[midnightsanguine]

Enjoy some Coleiji angst I wrote at 4am while sleep deprived and crying over them<3

~~~~~~~~

“Your hands are freezing.” Eiji says with a gentle smile, holding Cole’s hands in his own. It’s not a particularly cold evening but it can’t be classified as warm either.

“You know I get cold easily.” Cole jokingly pouts while interlocking fingers with his lover.

They are in their usual hangout spot in the forest clearing. This is Eiji and Cole’s happy place. Somewhere to be completely alone with one another without fear of interruption.

“You need to wear gloves then. I can't be your personal heater forever, Cole.” He leans his head over to rest it against the other's shoulder. “It makes me cold when you do that, then that does neither of us any good.”

Cole laughs softly, pressing a kiss to the top of Eiji’s head. “I know. I know. I’ll wear gloves next time.” He won’t. He likes the way Eiji’s warm hands feel on his cold ones.

“Mhm.. you better.” Eiji knows for a fact Cole isn’t going to but he can’t be bothered to push it.

The two fall into a comfortable silence. Both of their eyes trail up to the night sky, some stars are already beginning to brightly gleam. It feels as though for a moment, all problems slip away. It’s just the two of them there and now. Always and forever.

“.. always and forever,” Eiji mutters, staring at the photo in his camera while sitting in the corner of a decrepit old classroom. A tear drops to the screen, beading down and off the edge.

Always and forever.