ようこそ 我が胎内へ

| 陈雨嘉 | めいこ | anything I see that's amusing or cool. nsfw-free, non-shipper blog.

[velinxi]

just let me forget

[velinxi]

Come on, I’ll teach you

Keep reading

[natalieironside]

What's the trope name for when someone finds out they're the Chosen One(tm) and is like "No, thank you" and goes and does something else

[dreamswhistlesandstories]

[neosilverthorn]

Refusal Of The Call is the actual trope name.  Usually followed by the tropes of The Call Knows Where You Live and You Can’t Fight Fate.

[silver-flame-alchemist]

The Call is Trying to Contact you about your Destiny's Extended Warranty.

[afeelgoodblog]

Surprise triplets 😂

[sandersstudies]

I can’t decide what’s funnier, if this was a genuine candid photo of the father’s shock, or if he was an excellent sport and was like “hey folks, know what would be hilarious…”

[lizluvscupcakes]

“Yknow, Ted, the guys at the bar are gonna wanna know what it was.”

“Bring the photo! It’ll be funnier if you bring the photo.”

[gay-ellis-thats-all]

Story Time!

My father, who is an identical twin, has two older sisters who were also identical twins. My grandfather’s favourite way to tell the story was that in 1956 when he was awaiting the arrival of 🤷‍♀️ Child™️, the doctor (who, in the small town where we’re from, had delivered my aunts a few years earlier) came to the lounge, lit a cigarette and took a seat next to him.

“Clifford… how are ya?” the doctor greeted.

“I’m alright… yourself?”

“Good, good…good, so how many ya want this time?”

My grandfather, even in the retelling of the story heaved the most world weary sigh and said, “…how many ya got?”

[deinvatiwrites]

My dad and uncle are twins and when my grandma was pregnant with them she asked the doctor if it could be twins. He said no, and gave her an X-ray (😬) to prove it. But after she delivered my uncle, the doctor was like, “Oh. Uh…” and she came up off the table to scream, “YOU SON OF A BITCH I TOLD YOU THERE WERE TWO IN THERE!”

I can absolutely picture her doing it too. I bet that doctor was scared to death. 😂

[ampervadasz]

[you-do-not-know]

“magic pot”

[dashaibo]

Not even for a second was I expecting any other ending to this video.

[dwagom]

[1coweveryday]

1/8/21 🐄

[some-1one]

[iris-collects]

Whoever designed this spent way too much of their childhood playing Sonic

[wearewatcher]

This one goes to our Tumblr followers!

[ostensiblynone]

Shane: This is from peggingmothman - [wheezes] Ryan: [wheezes] Shane: - obviously, on Tumblr. Okay, that scans. [laughs] “When I was younger and not the seasoned bitch I am now - ” What are we in for, here?! [wheezes] Seasoned bitch! I’m just gonna - I want that on my lower third, on every piece of media I’m in, from now on. Seasoned bitch! Where are we goin’ from here?! Ryan: [laughing so hard he’s crying] I don’t know, I got lost at peggingmothman. Shane: peggingmothman, very funny to begin with! Ryan: “This comes from peggingmothman.” Wait, sorry, could you read the first sentence again? I didn’t hear any of it, ‘cause I was too busy - Shane: You didn’t hear the first sentence? Ryan: No, I got - oh, I’m sorry, I got fucking lost at ‘peggingmothman’! Shane: “When I was younger and not the seasoned bitch I am now.” Ryan: Yeah, yeah, okay. Shane: You don’t appreciate that? Ryan: I’m sorry, I’m still thinking of peggingmothman. Shane: Okay. Oh, boy! “I was held hostage at the end of a date.”

[everythingfox]

(via)

[itsdansotherblog]

The middle aged detective that can’t talk to their wife starter pack

[petal-metal-blog]

OH HI yeah i just reblogged the old picture of my shoes

so here’s a new one WITHOUT THE ANKLE BRACELET 

l o l

[mukuharakazui]

this post feels like it’s from an alternate futuristic dimension

[stankyleg-deactivated2918973]

[birdmonster13]

for anybody who forgot

[artofpiju]

I'm never my best in morning classes

[dykecadence]

every moment of every day i am thinking about this tiktok

[purrfectly]

Lumpfish come in a variety of shapes and colors.

[He scoops up the fish, it spits water and he turns it toward the camera]

This one is stumpy and green. Very beautiful, very powerful.

[He picks up another fish and turns it toward the camera]

This is what a normal lumpfish looks like. It is more elongated, but still a vibrant blue color. Very beautiful, very powerful.

[He picks up another fish and turns it toward the camera]

This is one of the stumpiest ones we have. Its hump is very high. It is very stumpy, but yet very beautiful, and very powerful.

[He pans over a lot of fish, all looking up at the camera]

My fish army is ever growing, and soon I will over throw the world. Very beautiful, very powerful.

[farmhouselove]

[velinxi]

“You are the worst teacher I’ve ever had”

“And you are by far the worst student I’ve ever taught”

OC drawings from my twitter

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

"princess diana was a girlboss who was murdered. but she was murdered by queen elizabeth, who was also a girlboss. so it was still a win for feminism" are you ok

i can tell this was sent by someone with toxic masculinity. not answering it.

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[randomfandomteacher]

“What the fuck?!” in Donald Duck’s voice is a mood I never knew I needed.