can i come over and go through the entire spectrum of human emotions again and again and again
Misplaced Lens Cap

oozey mess
RMH

blake kathryn

JVL

No title available
No title available

titsay

Janaina Medeiros

Origami Around

★
art blog(derogatory)

Product Placement
Cosimo Galluzzi

PR's Tumblrdome
d e v o n
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

Andulka
taylor price

ellievsbear
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from India

seen from Germany

seen from Türkiye
seen from Malaysia

seen from Malaysia

seen from Germany

seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States

seen from Türkiye
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
@mintheaa4a
can i come over and go through the entire spectrum of human emotions again and again and again
Stray: Lee Dokyeom x Cat Hybrid!Reader
A/N: so there are a lot of hybrid AUs out there where the members are the hybrids but it got me thinking about dk with cat hybrid reader (i heard dk was allergic but dw i got it covered)
tw: 18+ because of eventual smut, swearing, hybrids are not treated well by society, a bit of trauma from reader being treated badly, reader doesn't have a home or food at the beginning, reader is extremely emotionally repressed whoops, mentions of death + starving, not really slow burn it's just long and has weird pacing because i refuse to cut out some bits, dk is a huge ball of sunshine, it starts off waffly but gets sm better i promise, cheating and breakup (not dk and reader),
wc: 11.7k (oops)
you'd had your dealings with humans, and most weren't pleasant
as a hybrid, you didn't fully belong with cats or humans
the latter often thought you were inferior, and treated you as much
you find your fully cat form is much more agreeable to your human form with ears - it feels less obvious that way, even though normal cats can smell that you're a hybrid
still, the world isn't kind, and you don't have a home
you'd stood up for yourself at your last job - a secretary in a huge office block - pointing out that you got a much lower salary than the comparable human employees, and had been promptly fired
briefly, a human couple had taken you in, but once they realised you were a hybrid, they kicked you out
which leaves you where you are now, wishing that you were just one or the other and not both
the winter is especially harsh this year, and your soft coat, matted from too many days on the streets, doesn't do much to keep out the cold
the wind is cutting, and you find yourself slinking through the back gardens of some low rise flats, wondering if anyone will spot you and think you're just a stray cat
you can't believe you're stooping this low, but you'd rather this than death by frostbite
like hell you're just going to give up now
it's not like you'd stay permanently without the home owners knowing you're a hybrid, anyway - you know how that ended last time
the muffled sound of laughter floats towards you, and you scale a fence, following the noises until you make your way into a rather overgrown garden
warm light spills through the glass doors, and you curl up on the patio, at the edge of the beam cast by the full kitchen
by full, you mean full
there must be over ten guys in there, all crammed shoulder to shoulder around the dining table, laughing raucously
they're all human, from what you can tell
you can feel a bit of the warmth seeping out from the miniature crack under the door, but before you dare inch forward, further into the light, one of them turns around
he's got a sweet face, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he laughs at one of his friend's jokes
the hackles on your back rise as you feel his gaze on you
you've learnt that when humans smile it doesn't always mean they're good people
retreating quickly, you find yourself thankful for the crowded garden, slinking behind a bush to get out of sight
you immediately feel the lack of warmth, the laughter more muffled from here
for some reason, an empty feeling wells up inside you, like you lost something
like you strayed from the path of your destiny
but deep inside you, the survival instincts tug you away from the warm kitchen and the warm smiles
those instincts haven't failed you yet, so why would they fail you now?
however, despite your so called survival instincts, you find yourself in the same garden a week later
again
you'd visited a few times, but they didn't really count, because all you did was peer furtively over the fence, ears swivelling vigilantly
you'd caught sight of the guy who spotted you before, peering outside and frowning
you assume he's the one who owns the bottom floor flat
you hope he was wondering if he should get his garden in order, because if he was, you whole heartedly agree - you almost poked yourself on the brambles a few times
right now, the Guy is washing up, his sleeves rolled up and his hair a bit of a mess, elbow deep in the soapy sink water
his glasses keep falling down his nose
the kitchen lights are on - it's almost dark, and the night's chill is creeping further into your bones
it's been so long since you've been inside that you find indoor lights kind of... mesmerising
it might seem strange, but you almost crave the fake yellow light the light bulbs give off
the Guy suddenly stops washing up and you almost fall off the back fence that you're perched on, thinking he's seen you
then he bobs his head in time to a beat you can't hear while busting out some quite respectable dance moves, and you realise he's just listening to music
it must be some pretty good music - now he's singing, and you can hear it faintly
wow, he's good
he also looks pretty engrossed
that's your queue; you jump down from the back fence, your paws pattering against the frosty patio as you approach
there's something that always draws you back here
and it's not just because of the warm air radiating from his badly insulated flat
still, you're wary - he might seem friendly, and you might feel a certain pull towards him, but that doesn't mean anything
lots of things have felt right that weren't
you're not making any mistakes this time
you're tired of being mistreated because you're a hybrid, and tired of being seen as a pet and not a person
never mind if this ends with the Guy feeding you caviar some cats could only dream of, if he looks at you funny, you're not going to even set foot in his mess of a garden again
with that thought, you curl up beside the glass door, happy to bask in the lingering warmth from the kitchen and enjoy the artificial light
turning your head, you peer at the Guy over the lip of the door
his shoulders are turned in your general direction, but he's looking studiously at the dishes in the sink, shimmying his shoulders and tapping his foot along to the rhythm of the music, so you decide to stay a little longer
that's when the grey clouds coalescing above you decide to start snowing
you feel the fur on your sides fluff up in response, and you wrap your tail around your paws, edging an inch closer to the door
the air is bitingly cold, and you wonder if you'll make it through the night if the snow settles
you haven't eaten a real meal in ages, and you're suddenly aware that it means your poor little cat body has even less insulation
you're certain that if you don't find shelter soon, tonight will be your last
but do you really want to seek help from some random human?
it's ended badly before, but you know it could have ended worse
you won't let that happen again
abruptly, you stand up, tail lashing in irritation at yourself - like hell you're going to come crawling into some human's home, ears pinned back like you need their help
it's not your fault you were born a fucking hybrid
you're halfway down the patio when a warm gust of air blasts down your spine
you wonder if hallucinating heat is an early symptom of hypothermia but continue resolutely making your way towards the back fence
'hey,'
you whip around, a snarl half forming on your face in shock, but it's just the Guy
he leans in the doorway, a smile on his face and his eyes sparkling
'you can come in, if you want.'
the warmth coming from inside his flat is absolute bliss
you're a metre away from the open door, but you can feel your bones defrosting, and you know however hard you try, you can't leave now
not now that he's offered
not when his kind smile triggers not zero, but minus one alarm bells in your head
you approach but hesitate, knowing you're being too quick to give in - he doesn't know you're a hybrid, and you don't know if he's secretly evil and plans to skin you as soon as you step through the door
just to be safe, you stop just out of kicking distance, staring up at him quizzically
surely, he wouldn't voluntarily let a hybrid into his house - you're much more expensive to look after than pets, because you'd basically be another human in the house who can't earn enough to pay bills
you're considering backing out, even with that delicious heat emnating from his kitchen, when he moves to the side so you have a clear path in
your eyes widen a little
you feel like he's being too nice
he laughs a little at your indecision, squatting down so he looks smaller and less intimidating
'come on. i know it must be way too cold out there. i'll let you out whenever you want to leave, if that's what you want.'
that's the final straw
you step over the threshold and bolt
you're not even sure where you're going, but you swerve away from a room where there are clothes strewn over a chair and the desk filled with clutter - that's definitely his bedroom
the only other room that isn't the bathroom or the kitchen is a dusty room full of cardboard boxes and a bed with no sheets on it
a guest room, you assume
flattening yourself against the floor, you crawl under the bed
quickly, you tuck yourself behind one of the boxes which had been artfully stuffed underneath the bed
once you're settled, it occurs to you that that was frankly rude of you
the Guy let you into his flat, and the first thing you do is sprint past him and invade his guest room
but then again, he probably thinks you're just some feral cat who he saved from becoming a feline icicle, so your behaviour would make sense
you tense when you hear footsteps pass the door, but he doesn't come in, just walks into what you assume is the bathroom
a few minutes later, you hear the shower turn on, and you relax a little more
maybe he'll let you be for now
curling your tail over your nose to stop yourself from snorting in the ridiculous amounts of dust under the bed, you wedge yourself further behind the box and close your eyes
it's amazingly warm in the Guy's flat, you'll give him that
warm enough that despite the hunger that's been gnawing at your stomach for the past week, you find yourself falling into a sleep deeper than you've been able to reach for ages
you'll get to sorting out the details of your little invasion of his flat in the morning
for now, you're happy to sleep
when you wake up, he's gone
understandably, though - he must work pretty hard to afford a nice-ish flat like this, and it is also twelve noon
unfortunately, he doesn't appear to have any cat flaps, so that means you'll have to momentarily shift into your very naked human form to let yourself out the back door
you wonder if you should check in his fridge if he's got anything to eat, but then you decide against it - he's already given you a place to stay for the night, no need to eat his food as well
ignoring the call of the fridge and the shower, you pad over to the back door, pausing when you see something propped against the glass
it's a little whiteboard, and as you approach, you make out the writing
it's got 'hi, i'm dokyeom, dk for short :D' written across the top, with a little flow chart beneath
it starts with two options: 'are you a hybrid' with a box for ticking under 'yes' and 'no'
under the option for 'no', it says 'i'll buy cat food' and under 'yes', it says 'there are spare clothes in the guest room and towels in the bathroom (both clean, don't worry), help yourself to anything in the fridge'
you sit down on your haunches, shocked
so he did consider that you could be a hybrid?
and he's alright with it?
plus, he managed to leave clothes in the room you were sleeping in, and you didn't wake up?
maybe your instincts aren't as good as you thought
or maybe your body thought you were safe last night - safe enough to not wake you up when the Guy (dokyeom, you've learnt from the mini whiteboard) came in
you cock your head, staring at the whiteboard for a few moments longer before making your decision
honestly, it's not hard to choose
you make your way to the bathroom, already eagerly anticipating a shower
sure enough, he's left a towel on the rail, and you're quick to hop into the shower, shifting into your human form and turning up the heat high
it's strange to be out of your cat form, your body suddenly seeming too large and ungainly, your senses immediately dulled
but in a way, it's also freeing - you haven't been able to be like this in ages, as clothes unfortunately don't shift with you from cat to human form
you feel more real this way
that's the problem: you can't exist as just one or another, both animal and human are part of your soul, your essence - you can't just pretend that one half of you doesn't exist
eventually, you drag yourself out of the shower
you're aware that he might have limited hot water, and what kind of guest would you be if you used it up before he even got a chance to get home?
wrapping the towel around you, you slip into the guest room to put on the clothes he'd left there
it's a pair of black tracksuit bottoms, a large white t-shirt and a grey hoodie, all obviously his
even in your human form, you can smell the mixed scents on his clothes
there's the fresh smell of clean laundry, a hint of aftershave, and his own unique scent: you can't quite put your finger on it, but it feels... cosy
it's a smell that's all over his house, actually
barefoot, you enter the kitchen again, scooping the whiteboard off the floor so you can write on it
you tick the box under 'yes'
underneath that, you write a quick note:
'thanks for letting me stay. i'll be out of your hair in no time, i just needed somewhere for the night. you're very kind, dk. thank you so much :))'
signing your name and setting the whiteboard down on the counter on the way to the fridge, you rummage around, wondering what you can cook
you're pleasantly surprised - the contents of his fridge aren't awful, and although they could be organised a little better, it's thankfully not full of expired ready meals or anything like that
feeling better than you've felt in ages, you wander around his kitchen until you find his rice cooker, and then you get cooking
you're absolutely ravenous, but you make sure to make enough for him too - he's been unnecessarily kind to you, this is the best you can do for him
you're just finished washing up your dishes when your instincts prickle
it's a sensation that happens a lot when you're in your human form - it means that your cat form would be picking up something that your human senses are too dull to detect
rushing back to the bedroom, you slip out of the clothes he laid out for you, hastily folding them before shifting back to your cat form
logically, you have no reason to fear
he's been nothing but kind to you, but he's still a human
and humans aren't always as nice as they seem
you feel so much more secure in your cat form - smaller, faster, better at avoiding sticky situations, better at surviving
your ears twitch as you hear a key scrape in the lock
that must be him - dk
you stand indecisively in the middle of the guest room, your claws sinking unconsciously into the carpet before you hastily retract them
by then, he's toed his shoes off and is in the kitchen
you hear a soft 'oh'
he's probably found the whiteboard on the counter, moved from where he left it, and the dinner you cooked for him
he calls your name then, and you almost jump out of your skin before you remember you wrote it on the whiteboard
feeling far too nervous, you trot out into the corridor, nudging the kitchen door open before entering
he's right there, leaning against the counter, his smiling eyes bright as he looks down at you
this is the first time you've really seen him, really realised you let your guard down and allowed some random guy to let you into his house
he looks absolutely huge
like, he could crush your cat form in his bare hands if he wanted to you, although you realise that's not that great of a feat considering your small stature
he would also tower over your human form, but then again, that's not much of an achievment
still, it makes you take a small step back
humans have unquestioned power over hybrids - you're pretty sure if he killed you right here and now, no one would know or care
and if someone did know, the case would be as likely to make it to court as you are likely to become a billionare next week
your hackles begin to rise, and you mentally run through your escape options
unfortunately, none avoid you shifting into your naked human form, even if it's just for a few seconds
you're beginning to panic
a lot
but then, he crouches down, just like last night
slowly, keeping his movements predictable, he reaches his hand out towards you
'i won't hurt you,'
you relax just a tiny bit, ears twitching, waiting to see what he'll say next
'promise.'
of their own accord, your hackles lower, and you find yourself inching towards his outstretched hand
'you don't have to leave, you know. it would be nice to have some company. plus, i don't want to make assumptions, but i'd rather not let you go if you have nowhere else to stay.'
part of your brain wonders why he's being so nice
the other part, the part that you've shoved down for so long, surfaces like a long lost ache, reminding you how lonely you are, reminding you how much you miss simple human interaction
dipping your head forward, you sniff at his broad palm, before lightly licking his fingertips
he chuckles, albeit a little nervously, as if he's scared you're going to bolt at any second (to be fair, if you were him, you wouldn't write off that option either)
his other hand comes up to rub behind your ears, and your eyes close at the feeling
the beginnings of a purr start to form in your chest, and you know that's when your fate is sealed
the permanence of that thought unsettles you
pulling away, you head towards the radiator, settling close to it, glad that your cat form means that you don't have to talk to him
he grins brightly at you, picking up the plate you left on the counter and putting it in the microwave for warming up
'thanks for the dinner, but you know you don't owe me anything, right?'
you blink up at him from your spot on the floor
he's literally the kindest human you've ever met
then again, you haven't met very many kind humans
that night you sleep curled up on the sofa - it's much more comfortable than wedged underneath a bed, and his cushions smell nice
in the morning, you hear dk get up, but he tip toes around quietly
cracking an eye open, you yawn, eyes blinking into focus as you watch him quickly scribble on the whiteboard, his brow furrowed in concentration
he glances your way, and for some reason, it shoots a bolt of panic through you, and you duck your head back down, closing your eyes
it's not that he's threatening - quite the opposite
it's just that you're not used to this; not used to being in such close proximity with another being for prolonged periods of time, not used to interaction with humans after avoiding them for your own sake for so long
you hear some shuffling, the sound of the fridge door, and then his footsteps approach
as he walks past, he brushes a hand lightly down the soft fur of your back, as if in greeting
you almost twitch at the feeling
you wonder how long it's been since you've let anyone come that close
not daring to move a hair, you wait until you hear him ease the front door shut
the second he's gone, you jump up, eager to see what he wrote on the whiteboard
it's on the counter, so you shift into your human form and put on some clothes - you're not sure what his rules about paws on tables are
there's a fresh t-shirt on the guest room bed, but you opt to wear the one you wore yesterday
a smile plays on your lips as you read what he wrote
it's a short but sweet message extolling the virtues of your cooking and telling you to help yourself to the fridge again, followed by a question asking if what food you would like and whether you prefer cat food
still grinning, you write your reply, explaining how you can eat both human and cat food and how you love tuna in either form, adding a short shopping list of ingredients and asking how his day was
once you're done, you decide to explore his flat properly
it consists of two bathrooms, two bedrooms, a tiny room with a washing machine and various bits and bobs crammed inside, and the kitchen which sort of melds with the living room (if you could call the couch and TV in one corner a living room)
you spend most of your time snooping around his bedroom, just to sate your curiosity
it's not neat, but it's not messy either, and the smell of him is strongest in there
you're sure his desk should be buckling under the combined weight of his pc and the impressive amount of paraphanalia that's collected upon it
it's not that it's dirty - it's actually pretty orderly, there's just... a lot of stuff
there's a mug full of pens which says 'dude kisser' on it (you're not going to question that one), a haphazard stack of books - the top one of which has a fuzzy bookmark sticking out, a pile of mismatching keycaps, a group photo of dk and twelve other guys with moustaches and other flattering things lovingly drawn on, and tons more stuff you couldn't explain even if you tried
the chair has a lot of clothes draped over it: nice, comfy clothes, like the ones he's lended you
you're tempted to explore further into his room, but you feel kind of rude so you scuttle back to the kitchen/living room to make the happy discovery that he owns a nintendo switch
that means he probably has some more complicated games lurking around but you're happy to settle with mario kart for now
it's not something you've played before, although you've heard some of your human ex-colleagues talking about it
by the time dk returns, though, you're a pro
well, maybe not a pro, but not inept, either
by then you've made dinner and left it out for him like yesterday - you feel kind of weird doing nothing but playing video games while he goes to work, and at least cooking for him makes you feel a little useful and not like some awful parasite taking advantage of him
he tells you about his day as he eats at the dinner table while you sit in cat form on the chair next to him
he smiles the whole time, and you find yourself relaxed and content, infected by his happy virus
once he's done with his debrief, he unthinkingly asks how your day was
you look at him and give him your best deadpan meow
he laughs and you find it a bit dazzling - he hands away smiles as if they're free, and honestly it kind of restores your faith in humanity
'what if you blink twice for yes and once for no? how about that?'
you blink twice at him
dk grins, his eyes lighting up; he's so excited you can almost imagine him clapping his hands and kicking his legs like an enthusiastic little kid
'do you like pineapple on pizza? is it wrong to wear socks and sandals? how about socks in bed? are tomatoes a fruit? is it right to have toilet paper over? or do you like it under?'
he bombards you with random yes or no questions, each one getting weirder than the last, but you find his delight in your answers is more than enough to let him continue
after about half an hour, he either runs out of questions or decides to spare you, asking instead whether you want to watch a movie
that's how you end up curled up on the sofa beside him
he'd insisted on a horror movie, even though you'd said no, very clearly blinking only once
you would leave but you think it's kind of entertaining how bad the makeup and plot are and how violent his reactions are (they consist of a lot of flailing and terrified squeaks)
despite your reluctance to watch a horror movie, he's actually more scared than you are
the poor thing is tense as anything, his mouth hanging half open as he stares wide eyed at the tv, transfixed
you're actually too busy watching him that when the jump scare pops up on screen, you jump about a foot high, landing hissing on his lap with your tail all fluffed up
your claws accidentally come out and prick him through his jeans and he yelps
'ouch - shit - ow - '
you hop off his lap and watch him dramatically curse and pretend to be wounded, both of you distracted from the movie now
eventually he calms down and goes back to watching, but not before he picks you up and plops you back on his lap, one hand anxiously smoothing down your back as you both wait for the next jump scare
after a while he goes so far as to pick you up and hold you to his chest, hiding his face in your fur every time the music warningly crescendos, whispering to you how utterly terrified he is
even still, his grip stays loose enough for you to move away at any time if you want
you'd think that after your previous experiences with humans, you'd hate him anywhere near you, but you don't
you don't mind it at all
it's kind of ridiculous actually, the way you feel safer than you have in months when he clutches you to him while watching a literal horror movie
you don't think much of it though
he's just a guy who's letting you stay for a bit
you don't plan to stick around
a week later, you find yourself writing an apology on the whiteboard that you'd been putting off since watching the movie
dk is welcoming and warm and friendly but you're sure he must be wondering why you haven't shifted into your human form yet
sometimes, you wonder that yourself - there's something in his eyes that instantly puts you at ease
the day before yesterday, you'd planned it, changing into your clothes - his clothes, and sitting on the sofa, ready to greet him, but the moment you heard his footsteps up to the front door, you just couldn't
your cat form still feels so much safer, even though you have nothing to fear
well, apart from all the explaining you'd have to do once you shift into a form with a tongue that can talk
you don't want to see the pity that would spring into his eyes, or worse, disgust
you're scared of the change it will bring
you're scared to let your walls down
you're scared to bare the soft, vulnerable part of your heart
clenching your teeth, you force yourself to relax, the marker in your hand shaking from how hard your fingers had been clenching around it
you lean against the counter for a while, writing messages then rubbing them out, needing to tell him why but also terrified of what he'll say
solitude has been your only companion for so long, you find that you don't have the words to express what you feel
you don't know how to tell him how you hadn't realised how lonely you were until he let you in
you don't know how to articulate the warm feeling inside you when he smiles at you, as if he doesn't care whether you're a human or a hybrid - because he doesn't
you don't know how to say how eternally grateful you are to him for finding something soft and gentle and innocent within you that you thought you lost years ago
in the end, you decide to keep it short, an apology that feels more like an excuse, but it's the best you can give him
sure, you don't plan to stay here with him forever, but you owe it to him anyway
your restless for the remainder of the day, pacing around the flat and the garden for a little too, tail lashing agitatedly
you've almost convinced yourself to go and rub out your message completely when you hear the front door open and dk comes in, calling out that he's home
peeking around the corner, you see him down the hallway but he doesn't spot you
he's got a strange look on his face, one you can't decipher yet, and there's a flowery scent on him that you've smelled only one time before
you wait just out of sight, not wanting to see his face as he reads
slowly, you venture out, feeling far more nervous than you should be
he sits down on the floor opposite you as soon as he spots you, signalling for you to do the same by patting the spot in front of him
you sink down on your haunches and curl your tail over your feet, nerves a tight ball in your chest
'you don't have to shift if you don't want to.'
the words immediately give you space to breathe, and you feel kind of silly for being so worked up about it all day
'i know hybrids aren't treated well at all, and i'm okay with whatever form you feel most comfortable in, you know? you can shift when you're ready, and whether that's tomorrow or in a decade or never, that's fine. you don't owe me anything.'
your chest feels tight at the earnesty of his words, and you know that if you were in your human form right now, tears would be welling up in your eyes
getting up, you close the gap between the two of you and rest your shoulder against his knee, needing to show your gratitude, needing to be closer to him
he rests his wide palm on your back, a silent assurance
'it's nice to have you here. i used to share with a bunch of my friends - the ones coming over tonight that i told you about this morning, actually - and sometimes it gets lonely in a flat all by myself. i like talking with you.'
you meow, nuzzling against his other hand as he lifts it to stroke the silky spot between your ears
it's amazing, how simple his words are but how he can use them so well, articulating how he feels so boldly
he smiles down at you and you look back up at him, leaning against his hand before he gets up, groaning and cracking his back
his friends will be here soon
he'd warned you this morning, informing you they were noisy but harmless and that if you didn't want to see them, you could hole up in the guest room
they're the first people he's had over since your first night in his flat, and you feel kind of nervous about so many humans, but dk will be there, and you're determined to at least attempt to meet them
anyways, if they're all anywhere close to him, you'll have no problems
still, you stay in the guest room, ears twitching with each arrival
they laugh and chat, their voices carrying through the flat as they jokingly rib each other
occasionally, they have a little karaoke break where they all stop talking to sing along to the song playing on dk's speaker
then there'll be peals of laughter that follow, usually after an exaggerated falsetto note or a scuffling noise which you assume is dancing
it's after their laughter dies down a little when you finally whip up the courage to approach
poking your head into the kitchen, you peer in
there's twelve of them, not including dk, all sitting around the dining table, an array of soju bottles and mainly empty takeaway boxes arranged around them
you're pretty sure they're the same group that you saw the first time you found yourself in dk's garden
one of them spots you in the doorway, and he grins, leaning with his elbows on his knees and opening his palms to you
cautiously, you trot over to him, and he scoops you up, tickling your chin
one of dk's friends across the table gapes at you - he's a bit more drunk than the others (or he holds his liquor less well), and the guy you're sitting on chuckles at his expression
'dk, you got a cat?'
that's the drunk one speaking, his speech a little slurred as his eyes well up with tears
he's a sad drunk, it seems
'dk, you're a dad - '
dk scratches the back of his neck, watching his friend sniffle
'well, hoshi, not a dad, but - '
the guy still holding you adjusts you in his grasp, letting you catch the thoughtful frown on his face
'why didn't you tell us? i thought you were al - '
he's cut off by a sassy looking guy
'jun, just because you want to have a baby shower for a cat doesn't mean all the rest of us do.'
this causes absolute chaos, and the one holding you - jun - lets you down on the floor so he can stand up in order to argue with the sassy guy about the benefits of cat baby shower
navigating your way through the mess of legs under the table, you make your way over to dk
he grins and rubs the spot behind your ears, and you lick his palm before someone grabs you around the middle and cuddles you
you hear dk telling the boys to be careful and it warms your heart a little that he's still looking out for you
he doesn't need to be worried, though
dk's friends are as sweet as he is
you sit with the boys for the rest of the evening
they all leave eventually, trickling out in ones and twos
the last one left is the one they call cheol - he seems to be the protector of the group, and he makes sure dk is alright and helps him clear up a little before he leaves too
once he's out of the door, dk crouches down in front of you
'you okay?'
you blink twice and he grins
'they can be pretty overwhelming and noisy at first, but they're my best friends.'
there's pride shining in his eyes, and you can't help but agree with him - despite their banter, you could tell that they care so much for each other, and for him
'i didn't know whether you wanted them to know you were a hybrid or not, i hope you don't mind that,'
you blink twice again, meowing and padding forward to rub against his shins
you're not quite sure what makes you do that, what primal part of you tells you to put your scent on him, but he chuckles, smile as bright as the sun as always
he scratches at the spot behind your ear and you purr, leaning your head into his touch
'oh - '
you look up, the wonder on his face making it seem like he just made you sprout wings and flash neon
it's cute that he's so proud that he's made you purr
it's been a few months since you first started staying with dk, long enough for the two of you to have a little routine
you cook and clean and generally try to make yourself as helpful as you can around his house while he's at work
he'll write a message for you on the whiteboard every morning, and you'll write your reply during the day
you always come out to greet him at the front door, no matter what
then he'll eat the dinner you made and answer your whiteboard message
from then on, you'll watch a movie with him or just chat
your communication has become easier - sometimes, he'll get his laptop out and you'll type what you're saying, but recently he's gotten scarily good at reading your body language
and no, you still have not worked up the courage to shift into human form yet
you're studiously ignoring the fact that the longer you leave it, the harder it gets
you're also ignoring your previously stated intentions of not staying
you know that this can't go on forever, and even if dk can understand you to an extent, that's not enough and you cost him extra water bills and food
you know he's too kind to bring it up but it eats away at you inside
you're happy to remain blind to the fact that you can't have a proper conversation with him until you shift into human form for now
you tell yourself that you'll deal with it later, whenever later is
another thing that you refuse to acknowledge is your feelings
your fear that you won't be good enough if or when you show him your human form, your fear that you're a dead weight, and worst of all, the growing realisation that he's stupidly fucking handsome
you'd realised but you hadn't realised until one day, after he got back from the gym
his skin had been covered in a light sheen of sweat, and he told you he was going to shower before eating
you'd kind of just blinked at him, too entranced by the amount of skin his tank top was showing
like, what does this guy not have?
he took a little longer than normal in the shower - you heard him absolutely belting out the lyrics to some ballad you'd never heard before, so you trotted down the hallway to listen more closely
and then the door to the bathroom popped open, along with a billow of steam and a delicious lee dokyeom
there was a towel around his hips, low enough to make your stomach twist, and the water rolled down the planes of his chest in a way that made you want to shift into your human form right then and there, just to wrestle that towel off him and kiss him until you ran out of breath
instead, you yowled and jumped about a foot in the air
he just laughed, running a hand through his wet hair to push it out of his eyes before crouching down, telling you he didn't mean to scare you
you meowed and kept your eyes on his face, not on the gap that had opened in the towel due to his bent knees, and definitely not on the wonderful sliver of tanned thigh that showed
the image of dk, damp and glorious under the tinny light of his bathroom, cloaked in steam, often circles around your mind to this day
and it's not just that either - he's also funny and kind and sweet and you feel yourself drowning in his eyes when you look at him too long
just as a reminder: cats do not like water
let alone drowning
the sound of footsteps on the pavement outside dk's front door shake you from your thoughts
there's clearly two people, and you hear dk's voice as the key scrapes in the lock
he's speaking in a tone you've never heard before, low and emotionally charged, like he's angry
you peek into the hallway as the front door opens
dk steps in, followed by a girl you've never seen before, but her scent matches that flowery scent you've smelt on dk a few times before
something sinks inside you
you didn't think he had a girlfriend, which now, in hindsight, seems like a really, really stupid assumption
he's handsome and kind and considerate with a smile brighter than the sun
but then you notice something else - the obvious frown on dk's face
there's a sort of tension in the air, crackling and heavy, like a storm's brewing and there are dark clouds swarming above
she ignores it, instead spotting you and immediately crouching and patting her thighs to try and entice you over as dk shucks off his shoes, face like thunder
she says something to him in an airy voice about him not telling her he had a cat
he shrugs, not mentioning that you're a hybrid and staying silent, which kind of alarms you, because the dk you know is friendly, warm - even when he's angry, it's always firey, nothing like the frigid detachedness in his eyes right now
cautiously, you approach, not really sure what to expect - you're sure she's his girlfriend; now you think about it, you did hear dk's friends discuss it briefly, you just didn't understand at the time
she reaches out to stroke your back, but it brings the cuff of her oversized leather coat near your face
you get a smothering whiff of heavy, masculine cologne that you know is not hers and is definitely not dk's
there's no hint of aftershave, no smell of fresh laundry, and not even a trace of that scent on him that makes you feel warm and comfy
and if this isn't her coat, and it's not dk's, then who's is it?
cheater
hissing, you recoil, your hackles up as you swipe at her hand with your claws out before she can lay a finger on you
you're kind of taken aback by the violence of your own reaction - the tension in the air must be getting to you, too
'oh. it doesn't like me much, you're sure it's not one of those hybrids, right?'
dk's frown deepens into a scowl you've never even seen a hint of on his face, his eyes flashing, filled with something absolutely livid
'let's talk in the kitchen.'
he doesn't even look at her when he says it, and as he turns to go, you can see how hard he's clenching his jaw
you head to the guest room to give them privacy while dk's girlfriend slinks after him
even across the apartment, you can hear too well
it's partly your enhanced cat hearing and partly that new timbre in dk's voice - he's not yelling, nowhere close, but his words carry through the walls
it's the angriest you've ever heard him
you've seen him angry before; frustrated, annoyed, down right incensed, but it always passes quickly, the sun breaking through the clouds with ease - dk doesn't hold grudges
you catch 'cheating' from his sentence, and then suddenly, his girlfriend raises her voice, like she's the one who should be angry, screaming that she doesn't get why he's so worked up over this
that's the exact moment where you want to march into the kitchen and fucking injure her, somehow
punching her in human form would be preferable but you'd be down to claw her eyes out in cat form too
who is she, to cheat on dk, the kindest man alive, then tell him it's nothing? tell him she doesn't know why he's worried?
she doesn't know what she's taking for granted, and she's a fool for that
plus, from what you can hear, he's being half as angry as he really deserves to be, anyway
you sit there in a tense, seething ball of rage, protective and furious on dk's behalf until he puts his foot down
his voice is quieter, more subdued, but he's moved to the kitchen door and you hear him clearly
'get out.'
mentally, you pump your fist in triumph - he should have kicked her out the moment she had the audacity to tell him he shouldn't be getting so worked up about her cheating
in fact, he should have never have let her in in the first place
you hear her screech something over her shoulder about breaking up, as if that wasn't already obvious
honestly, you're kind of embarrassed on her behalf
she should be winning awards for how far her head is up her own ass
dk shuts the door behind her
he doesn't even slam it, just eases it closed like he always does and plods to his room
you hear the rustle of the blankets as he slumps down on the bed, hear the shaky sigh he lets out, and then the heavy silence
you get up and go to his room - the door is ajar, so you peek in
you don't go in; he has every reason to want to be alone, so you hover in the doorway
he lifts his head up and gives you a valiant smile
he looks exhausted
you hop up onto the bed and wait, not wanting to crowd him if he doesn't want contact, but he picks you up and sets you on his chest
you can tell he's fighting with his words as he formulates something to say to you
he stares up at the ceiling, avoiding your eyes until he covers his own with his arm, hiding the upper half of his face in the crook of his elbow
'i found out she was cheating this morning, but i'd suspected it for a while before. i wanted to talk it through with her, give her a chance, you know?'
he squirms and you realise your claws are coming out and poking his chest so you withdraw them and attempt to relax
'she told me i was overreacting, and... yeah. i guess i should have listened to my mum. she's always right.'
he laughs, but it's a loose, raw sound that echoes weakly around the room, and he still won't look at you or uncover his eyes
there's a moment of silence, thick and suffocating with heartache
a sob wrenches from his chest
it's a sharp, painful sound, like he's been holding it in for hours
the floodgates open
dk covers his face with trembling hands, tears leaking out from under his palms
you never thought seeing someone else cry would hurt this much
nudging his hand with your nose, you let him hold you close, rubbing your cheek against his and gently lapping the tears off his face, even as they soak your fur
you feel helpless, like the pieces of his heart are in your hands and you don't know how to fit them back together
he just clings to you, eyes tight shut as his sobs begin to subside
you stay there with him, wishing you could do more as he hides his face in your fur and hugs you close to him
you don't know what that girl was thinking when she decided to cheat on dk
actually, she probably wasn't thinking at all
you kind of want to tell him he's too kind and trusting for his own good, but you know that even if dk was capable of not being like that, he would choose to be the way he is
his hand strokes down your back, and you watch him from where you rest your head on his collarbone
he's staring at the ceiling, and although his eyes are red and a bit puffy and he's sniffling, his crying has subsided a little
dk props himself up on his elbows and gives you a sad smile
'sorry about that. and thanks, too, i - i needed that.'
you huff, tail flicking and smacking against his abdomen - as if he needs to be sorry
nuzzling into the hand he brings up to rub your head, you lick his palm, nudging it with your nose
then you hop off the bed and wait for him to follow you into the kitchen so he eats his dinner
you don't take your eyes off him, not even when he goes to sleep
you curl up in the corner, happy to sleep on the carpet, but he pats the mattress next to him and you can't refuse
it's nice, to sleep beside dk, his body warm and near as he reaches across the bed to run his hand down the fur of your spine and beckon you closer
over the next months, you watch dk heal
you help him heal, too
at least, you hope you do
you make sure to stick close to him
you've slept curled up at the foot of his bed every night since the day of the break up
he calls his mum the day after, and a few of his friends too
he stays strong and determinedly brave in front of the boys, not shedding a tear, but he cries on the phone to his mum
he also cries over a few emotionally fraught kdramas during the first week before you sit on the remote and refuse to move until he chooses another genre
truth be told, you were getting kind of sick of the same plot with different characters, and the pile of tissues on the coffee table in front of the sofa was growing frighteningly large
exactly a month has passed since the break up when, over his dinner, dk announces to you that he's finally installing cat flaps for you
he also mentions that he wants to introduce you to his friends properly, as who you are
the latter comment kind of makes you nervous
his friends are some of the most welcoming, commendable men you've ever interacted with, but a niggling part of your brain wonders if they'll be more sceptical than dk
what if they tell him you're taking advantage of him?
or that you're just a hybrid and don't deserve the kindness he's giving you?
because after all these months with dk, you realised you're not just staying for the roof over your head or the warm meals
you're staying because of dk
you care about him
a lot
not just because you're sort of a little bit hopelessly in love with him, but also because he's kind of... your best friend
he's so sweet and silly and and considerate and funny it makes you want to punch a wall sometimes
you'd protect him with your life
you don't really know how to say it to him, though
there's nothing more you can do in the house, and the words don't seem right on the whiteboard
you wait out the hours until he gets back from work, doing chores around the house or out exploring the neighbourhood through the newly installed cat flap in the back door
or singing in the shower, like you are now
dk's bathroom has very good acoustics
it means you can belt your heart out, happily knowing that dk won't be home for another few hours
you're singing one of the songs dk's friends had been singing the other night
it's kind of sad but also kind of a hoe anthem and the chorus has something about not understanding something - you don't remember the rest of the lyrics
it has a good tune, though, and your own singing combined with the splashing of the shower seals you off from the outside world
which means that when dk gets home early, you don't hear
originally, the only explanation for a female voice coming from his bathroom that he can think of is his ex, but that's dumb because she never had a key in the first place
also, her voice can't even compare to yours
because it is you, he realises
it's you in the shower right now, oblivious to the fact he's home early and is hearing your voice for the first time ever
a little bolt of nervous energy shoots through him, and he panics
what's he supposed to do? should he shout that he's home?
he decides he doesn't want to scare you just in case you panic, so he approaches slowly, hoping to knock on the door and let you know
he soaks up the sound of your voice, a smile playing on his lips, because of course you sound amazing
he's about to knock on the door when the handle turns
wait is all he gets out before suddenly, there you are, right in front of him, wrapped in a towel, cat ears peaking out from your hair that's dripping onto the tiled floor
his brain freezes
shit, you're pretty
you gape at dk
you didn't even hear him come in, let alone him walking down the hallway
this is probably karma from that one time you saw him fresh out of the shower
you'd known that it was inevitable for him to see you in human form at some point, whether it was intentional or not
you just didn't expect it to be so soon, and definitely not like this
oh no
he didn't hear your singing, did he?
instinctively, your hand comes up to make sure the towel around your chest is secure
you're seconds away from shifting and running, but you're rooted to the spot, paralysed by his eyes on you
he blinks a little, as if he's coming to his senses
'...hey,'
that's all he says, his voice soft and wondrous, his eyes sparkling the way they always do, sweet and inviting as the smile pulling at his lips
'hi,'
unfortunately for you, it comes out half strangled and breathy, but a grin immediately appears on his face, his eyes scrunching with happiness
he hasn't looked away once, gaze roving over your face as if he's committing you to memory, and you feel a hot blush begin to creep over you
'i, uh, let me go change.'
you scurry back into the bathroom, almost tripping over the bathmat as you shuck on a shirt and trousers, small tremors going through your hands
you tell yourself it's fine
because it is fine - you're not scared of dk, you trust him, it' just... you should have shifted for him ages ago
placing your hand on the door handle, you take a deep breath
turning back to the mirror, you hastily fix your hair before biting the bullet and opening the door
dk waits outside, leaning against the wall, still smiling
when you peek out, half hiding behind the door, his grin widens, and he opens his arms
you barely need to think, your body just moves, and then he's got you tight in his embrace, your nose pressed into his chest: just like that, any semblance of unease or self consciousness you were feeling evaporates like the space between you
slowly, you breathe in, then out
he smells like he always does - laundry, aftershave, and the scent that you've begun to associate with home
you sigh, resting your forehead on his chest so you don't have to look at him when you speak
'well, that wasn't so hard for me, was it?'
he laughs, eyes dancing, and with that, everything is back to normal
it doesn't matter which form you're in, it's still dk, and it's still you
you talk to him for ages - first over dinner, and then the two of you move to the couch, losing track of time as you fill him in, answering every question he fires your way
his sincerity makes your heart flutter: he clings onto your every word as if it's precious
in the end, you wind up telling him how you got to the situation you were in before
you lay yourself bare, letting your walls down for him to see the scars on your soul
you're not sure when the tears pricking at your eyes spill over, but dk wipes them away gently, spreading his arms for the second time tonight, letting you soak the front of his hoodie with your tears
he tucks your head against his shoulder, his hand rubbing up and down your back the way he always does
his heartbeat is comforting under your ear
you fall asleep like that, held safely in dk's embrace
things continue as normal, even with your human form revealed
you realise how stupid you were for worrying so much about things changing when you shifted into your human form
you talked to dk about how you feel like a burden, how although he doesn't mind, you don't like relying on him to pay the bills, and how you want to get a job
he reassured you that it was fine but after seeing the look of determination on your face, he realised there was no point in opposing you
so he pulls some strings (more like cheol pulls some strings) to get you a part time job in the local library
it's just three days a week, but the important thing is that you get paid and treated the same as any human would
your boss is a little old lady with very thick reading glasses
she bakes you cakes sometimes, and once she's fed you a slice or two, she forces you to take the rest home
it's not anything like your old job, but neither would you want it to be
it doesn't pay your bills either, but it's a happy compromise
dk claims that coming home every day to a meal that you cooked is worth the money of those bills a hundred times over, anyway
you also officially meet his friends
they're sweet, a bit noisy and chaotic at first, but they make sure to keep you included in the conversation despite all the private jokes that they seem to have
they act a bit like a huge family unit (they bicker like brothers)
despite their closeness with each other, it doesn't push you away
they didn't even care that you were a hybrid
you caught a knowing look pass between the one called joshua and the one called jeonghan when dk introduced you, but you're not really sure what it could have been about
you were probably just imagining it, to be honest
anyways, aside from occasionally attending their boys nights (on demand, they always clamour for you to join them), the little routine you and dk made is still very much the same
you still cook for him, except now you wait and eat dinner with him
there's never a dull moment with dk, and he makes you laugh until you can't breathe
he's made it his personal goal over dinner to make you laugh so hard you snort food up your nose again
you talk about everything and anything to him
he'll tell you about a funny thing at work and you'll tell him about a customer at the library and somehow that will bring you to a debate on hogwarts houses
today he sits across from you, the food on his plate already all long gone and eaten while you're just finishing up with yours
'you know, i'm allergic to cats.'
you gape
because he's what now?
'you're what now?'
'well, not to you, i guess. maybe you're hypoallergenic?'
now you think of it, you do remember one of his friends almost saying something about that the first time you ever saw them
it might have been jun, you can't quite remember
'you know, when you first sat next to me on the sofa, i was panicking because i didn't know what to do with cats.'
you snort
you address him as you get up, dumping your plate in the sink before proceeding to dive onto the sofa
'you didn't know what to do with cats? you just stroke us, dk.'
he follows suit, and you're propelled upwards due to the force that he lands on the sofa cushions with
'yeah, but it's different from how you stroke dogs. it doesn't matter, anyways, because i still got you to purr.'
he crosses his arms and smiles smugly
you throw back your head and laugh, realising why he looked so proud when he found the spot behind your ear
actually, you laugh so hard your stomach hurts, and it's only egged on by the small indignant noise that leaves him at your reaction
eventually, you need to catch your breath, and as you wipe the tears from your eyes, you glance over at dk
your heart lurches
he's staring
there's this look on his face, in his eyes, that burns
his lips are slightly parted, and suddenly the air between the two of you is charged in a way that makes your heartbeat pound loud in your ears
his gaze flicks down from your eyes, down to your mouth, then back up, and all of a sudden, you can't breathe
you can't even think as he leans closer, his breath ghosting over your lips
your head spins, fear and elation fighting for control
is he... is he going to kiss you?
his hand comes up to cup your cheek, his slender fingers warm and so undoubtedly right
like it's meant to be
'can i kiss you?'
his words come out so softly that you could almost believe you imagined them, if not for that look in his eyes
it's deep and immense, full of want, full of longing
it sweeps you up in its arms, promising you the love you only dare to dream of
it's beautiful
it's everything
also, it's fucking terrifying
panic grips your swelling heart and crushes it
he can't want you, he shouldn't - you're a hybrid, he's a human, it will never work, you'll just get hurt when he realises you're not good enough, when he realises how much harder it is to be associated with your kind, you can't disappoint him -
leaping off the sofa, you shift into cat form and sprint for the back door
you shoot right through the cat flap and run, legging it to the end of the garden and launching yourself over the fence
despite your speed, you still spare dk a backward glance
he sits, frozen on the sofa, his head turned towards you, eyes wide and bewildered
they're brimming with regret and what you'd like to imagine is sorrow
you never thought the ache of yearning in your chest would be returned, so you let it carve out a space for him in your heart
you didn't think he'd try to fill it, you didn't think he'd be dumb enough to want a hybrid like you
that night, you try to leave
you try to walk down the road, away from dk's house, away from dk and his comforting scent and warm hands
you can't
your soul seems tethered to his, and you can't bring yourself to cut the strings
you spend the night sitting in the garden next to his, tail curled around your paws, bathed in the glow of his kitchen lights that don't turn off until around three am in the morning
you shiver in the dark, fighting with yourself until you decide to go back, to talk it out with him because that's what he deserves
you hate to slink back to him after being such a coward, but you need him to know that you do want him, that if you were a human, if you were good enough for him, you would have kissed him in a heartbeat
quietly, you slip through the cat flap make your way into the guest room
it's changed so much since the first night you spent in it - dk moved most of the boxes out of it, making it your room, even though you sleep in his most of the time
there's a selfie of you and dk, wrapped up in blankets for movie night, and a group photo of you and the boys halfway through the most chaotic game of cards you've ever participated in
you're determined not to lose this, lose them
you're determined not to fuck this up more than you already have
quickly, you shift and change into your clothes, just to stand in the middle of the room, not entirely sure what to do with yourself
you remain there, silently fretting, until there's a soft tap on the door
your breath catches in your throat but you manage to wheeze out a somewhat convincing 'come in'
dk peeks in and leaves the door open - you're aware that he's left it that way to give you a clear escape route
he chews on his lip, running a hand through his hair, and you notice that he looks tired, as if he hasn't slept all night
'i heard you come in, and i just wanted to say that i... i'm sorry. i didn't mean to overstep the boundaries. i just - you're... i'm sorry i messed up. asking to, um, you know, wasn't a good idea on my part, i don't - i didn't know what i was doing, i kind of just...'
he sighs, looking at you sheepishly once he realises he was rambling
'please don't go?'
that's the moment you give in
you let go of it, of everything, and let yourself fly into freefall
stepping forward, you hook an arm around his neck, sinking your other hand into his hair, bringing his face down to yours to fit your lips to his
he makes a soft, awed noise, his fingers curling around your waist to press you closer to him
he tastes divine, like heaven, like the best kind of destiny
the feel of his lips against yours becomes everything you'll ever need
hesitantly, you begin to pull away, words already forming on your tongue, but then he darts forward to steal another sweet, sweet kiss from you, and then you're drowning in him again
he tangles his hands in your hair, his fingertips brushing over your ears, tracing their shape as if to show you that he doesn't care what you are
when he eventually breaks the kiss off, he presses a finger to your lips before you can draw a breath
'don't tell me i don't know what i'm getting into. i thought i lost you, i thought you were leaving, and i couldn't... please, just let me love you.'
he immediately cringes at his own words, and you let your head fall forward until your forehead rests against his chest, huffing out a laugh
'i'm sorry i freaked out before, i - i got scared. then i didn't know what to do so i just kind of ran. i didn't mean to scare you.'
he pouts cutely, in a way that makes you want to poke his cheeks
'well, you did. i - '
you cut him off with a kiss, just to taste him again if not to shut him up
his hands find your hips, drawing you closer to him
'i think i love you.'
the confession slips out of you, mumbled onto his lips before you can stop it, but all he does is smile into the kiss
'i think i love you too.'
when the boys find out, they tease dk mercilessly while somehow also hyping him up
seungcheol, jeonghan and hoshi all claim to have known about it from the start, although everyone knows hoshi is just saying that
jeonghan purposefully sits next to you just to quietly tell you about how he managed to get dk drunk enough one time for him to confess that he was in love with a cat
dk gets pouty about it later, so you kiss his face all over until he smiles again
in fact, he pretends to sulk a lot to get kisses from you
sometimes, you'll catch him just staring at you with a huge grin on his face
he makes a point to hold your hand in public, telling you that he's proud of having you
his sweet words make it easy for you to brush off the stares of the people on the bus, easy for you to ignore the way they whisper
sometimes dk kisses you and loudly calls you disgustingly sappy pet names in front of them, just out of spite
you realise now that they don't really bother you, not when dk doesn't care about them and not when he loves you the way he does - unconditionally
he shows it in the way he hangs onto your every word, in the way he cooks your favourite dishes for you, in the way he holds you, in the way he kisses you as if you're the most precious thing in the universe
you take every opportunity to show him how much you love him, too
hence why you're up early, cooking breakfast for dk
it's a saturday, and the sun leaking through the curtains woke you, even though it didn't even affect dk - he remained snoring beside you, his legs tangled with yours and his arms locked around your waist
you'd eased your way out of his grip and replaced yourself with a pillow, pressing a light kiss onto his forehead before shifting into your human form and pulling one of his t-shirts over your head
most nights, you sleep in your human form, but he'd been hogging the blankets so you'd shifted into your cat form in a desperate effort to make it easier for you to squirm into his blanket burrito
'what're you smiling about, huh?'
you almost drop the pancake you were transferring to a plate already heaped high and steaming with others
his arms wrap around your waist, and you sigh as he kisses your neck
'actually, i was thinking about how rude it was of you to steal the blankets last night, you sneaky little bastard.'
'hmm, my bad.'
he nips at your neck before his tongue flicks out to brush over the same spot
his hands wrap around your hips, and you sigh noncommittally as he sneaks his fingers under the hem of your - his - t-shirt
'babe, the pancakes will get cold - '
'don't care.'
you don't even try to shake him off as he continues to kiss at your neck from behind, nudging the collar of your shirt to the side so he can suck a hickey onto your shoulder
the air of the kitchen is cold on your bare legs, but he's nice and warm and solid, and you lean back into him, eyes closing as he laves his tongue over your skin
a low purr emnates from deep in your chest, and you feel him pause at your back
'that's never happened before,'
'and?'
'it was kind of hot.'
you huff out a laugh, but it's cut off as he spins you around, gripping your chin so he can kiss you
dk kisses you passionately, like he woke up with the one desire to taste every inch of your mouth, his teeth grazing dizzyingly over your lower lip
he grins against you when you moan at the feel of his tongue against yours
hooking your arms over his shoulders, you draw him closer
picking you up, he deposits you on the island, not breaking the kiss
he slots himself between your legs, his fingers skimming over the tops of your thighs, pushing the hem of your shirt a little higher
hooking an ankle around his hip, you nestle your heel in the small of his back, nudging him closer
something in your stomach pulls wonderfully tight when you feel the grind of his hardening cock against your clothed cunt
he chuckles at the involuntary noise that leaves you, one of his hands coming up to cup your breasts as he leans down, palms dragging down the length of your thighs as he hooks them over his shoulders
he helps you shimmy out of your underwear, chucking them carelessly over his shoulder
and then, just like that, he's got his mouth between your legs, spreading your pussy with his fingers, his eyes disarmingly guileless
his tongue is divinely velvet as he sweeps it through your folds
he tastes you as if your essence is the nectar of the gods, teasing the pleasure out of your body, holding your trembling thighs up with his big hands
as you come, convulsing around his tongue, he looks up at you with stars in his eyes, as if you're a goddess
it's ridiculous, the way he can make your heart flutter while fucking eating you out like a man starved
he straightens, kisses you with honey drenched lips that bear a virtuous smile, and lifts you up in his arms so he can make love to you on the sofa
he makes your eyes roll, makes your toes curl, makes you cry his name, sets you alight with his touch
and when he sends you over the edge, coming with you, when he scoops you up in his arms, sets you on the bathroom sink to clean you up, when he kisses you in the shower, you know one thing
you are willingly trapped in his gravity; you orbit him as if he is the star at the centre of the universe, yet somehow he looks at you with a light in his eyes, like you are the sun, the warmth on his skin, the reason for life
you love this man, irrevocably so, and somehow, miraculously, he loves you back
rehearsals | backstage series | l.sm
Being in love with your best friend has been an experience with many trials and errors. Mostly errors.
♡︎ pairing: lee seokmin x afab!reader ♡︎ genre: fluff, smut mdni you'll get blocked ♡︎ aus: theatre performer seokmin, best friends to lovers ♡︎ word count: 9k
↣ part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, navi post — other fics
₊🎧: cool with you - new jeans ♡︎ | love scene - baekhyun ♡︎
₊ nsfw tags under the cut
♡︎ warnings: swearing, smut with plot, soft-dom seokmin, big dick seokmin, dirty talk, multiple orgasms, cum swallowing, teasing, unprotected sex, creampie, oral sex (f, m), pussy stretching (f), pet names: noodle, baby, love (hers) baby, babe (his)
part 5
There had only been a handful of times that Seokmin has slept next to you like this. His nose buried on the sweet scent of your hair, his arms draped around your naked body, feeling your heartbeat so close to him.
Seokmin remembers the first time he slept with you like this: the night he spent on your sofa with your body on top of his. It was a tight space for the two of you, but somehow you both made it work.
You had placed the half of your body on top of his and tangled your legs with his. So he had no choice but to sleep with his arms around your body.
That happened five weeks ago—and so much has gone down between you and Seokmin since then.
Now you were in his bed, wholly naked in his sheets. Over the night you scooted towards Seokmin's body, he was convinced you did it unconsciously, almost as if in dreams you were making sure he didn't go anywhere.
His fingers were tangled with yours, his arms around you, your back pressed to his chest. As soon as he woke up, he realised that it wasn't a weird dream and that you indeed were in his bed next to him.
A dream come true, maybe.
Five weeks it took for Seokmin to realise just how deeply in love he was with you. Why didn't he realised it sooner, he wasn't sure. Scared to be unreciprocated in his feelings.
Who would've thought he'd be in love with his best friend.
Apparently a handful of people did see this coming. But he never really saw it, and for the longest time you were just friends. Even when he fucked you for the first time, just friends. Until the idea of him always having a crush on you invaded his mind, it becoming fuzzy.
Maybe he was always in love with you.
But he always remained fine with the idea of being your friend despite you going on dates with different guys, going through multiple heartbreaks and eventually landing a long relationship with somebody else, though it turned sour.
He remained clueless by your side. In love, yes. But clueless.
After some long minutes of him being lost in thought, you stirred in his bed. You stretched one arm out, fingers touching the air as you took a long breath and looked around.
"Hi there," he murmured.
You hummed softly, and he unavoidably smiled because hearing your voice as the first thing in his day could probably turn into his new favourite thing.
"G'morning," you replied in a soft sigh.
When you let go of his fingers, he got the chance to stretch the stiffness out of them. Then you turned around in the creamy white bed sheets.
Seokmin looked at you with curious eyes as you found a new way to cuddle, nuzzling your face in the crook of his neck, eliciting a chuckle from him. He felt your breath land softly on his chest when you sighed again, encircling his body with your arms once again.
"Noodle," he murmured, placing a hand on the back of your head.
"Mmm?"
"Are you dozing off again?"
"Maybe," you cooed, but then your lips pressed on his skin. "Why."
He groaned silently, feeling the skin on his arms prickle. "You passed out on me last night," he said as your lips attacked the soft spots on his neck. "I'm worried, that's all."
"'m fine, Seokmin," you mumbled and your hands travelled on the bare skin of his back and to make things worse, you nibbled at the soft part of his neck.
"Baby, don't do that," he muttered, wincing under the newfound sensitiveness of his neck under your attack.
"I thought you liked it," you cooed sweetly and he could picture you pouting cutely from the way you said it.
"I do but," he pulled back to peak at your face, he moved his hand from the back of your head to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. "I will only want more and you know what happens next and my roommate is here so we can't make noise."
Your eyebrows shot up. "That hasn't stopped you before," you grinned.
Seokmin rolled his eyes, but a smile slowly crept on his face. "I know. I just..."
You chuckled. "Alright, alright. I'll stop," you mumbled and went back to cuddle with his body.
It seemed for a moment that you were dozing off again. Seokmin felt your body relax and try to make yourself more comfortable, and that meant moving your limbs on his bed, and somehow your belly pressed against him, inevitably finding his hard cock.
Your eyes shot open.
"You're–"
"Obviously," he muttered through gritted teeth.
"But I haven't done anything–"
"You don't have to–"
"How?"
"Just being this near to you gets me hard," he explained with a shy laugh. "You don't have to do anything, just exist."
"How does that even happen?" your brow furrowed as you lifted the sheets up to take a look.
Only to find him fully hard, the tip of his cock glistening wet in his precum. You swallowed hard at the sight, thinking that Seokmin had been hard for a while now, he must be aching.
He was.
"I've no idea," he groaned, pushing the sheets back down to cover his naked body. "The only thing that occurs to me is that I like you so much that you get me hard, no matter what you do. I'm new to this, you know."
Seokmin has had a couple of flings before, nothing too lasting nor important, even. They were all great girls and everything ended nicely with all of them.
But now this was a different and new territory for him. This was the first time he's been with someone he knew he was in love with.
He saw you press your lips in a cute smile, a fond look in your eye as your hand caressed his side.
"Do you want me to do something about it? Maybe I can suck you off, if you promise to be quiet," you whispered, your eyes travelling to his lips and back to his eyes.
He groaned in frustration. "Don't say things like that," he reprimanded with a soft tone, but his hands pushed you so that your back was completely pressed to the bed.
Seokmin pinned you against the mattress, his arms on the sides of your head as he dipped his to find your lips with a chaste kiss.
A satisfied smile appeared on your lips when he parted your legs and slotted his body between them.
"Why, I mean it," you replied, feigning innocence. "Or, maybe we both could give each other head, like a sixty nine thing, I dunno."
As he dipped his head in the crook of your neck, he let out a breathy chuckle. "Baby, you literally passed out last night."
He surveyed the hickeys he had created on your neck, they took a vibrant red colour that contrasted beautifully with your skin. He bent his head and kissed the sensitive marked areas with care.
"I want you so bad I think I'll need you to fuck me everyday, Seokmin," you said with a soft sigh that told on your playfulness. "I'm really wet right now. Please, fuck me, please?"
Seokmin had discovered two things about himself ever since he first fucked you. One, he really liked hearing you beg. Whenever you begged for him to rail you, something would scratch an itch in his head, as if he needed to hear your sweet voice beg and see your pretty face when you were so needy in order to get with his day.
Two, he was really weak for you. So, you didn't have to beg all that much.
"Be good," that was all he said before nudging your entrance with his cockhead, skipping all buildup.
In truth, Seokmin had been hard from the moment he woke up beside you. So he was just as needy as you were, he was just a bit better to keep himself controlled.
You were indeed not lying.
"Holy shit. You're so fucking wet, baby," he groaned quietly as he begun to thrust inside your walls, slamming his cock to the hilt then he realised you were so wet you were nearly dripping on the bed sheets.
You moaned and nuzzled your face against his shoulder, trying to muffle the sounds that started to slip out of your lips when Seokmin started plunging in and out of you.
His thrusts were calculated and fast, so hard that your whole body was bouncing on his bed. It surprised you that the bed almost didn't make any noise as he quite literally pounded on you, fucking you open. You held him as humanly close to your chest, and wrapped your legs around him to attempt to not make any noise.
You bit the bulging muscle on his shoulder, not too hard, but enough to make him groan.
"I told you to be good," Seokmin cooed softly and moved his head to kiss your lips to drown out your moans.
"I-I'll be good. I promise babe," you replied. "It's just—you feel so good."
Seokmin's chest tightened. Whenever he heard you call him in any affectionate way, he'd feel something entirely new to him. He had never experienced that in bed, so whenever you called him sweetly, he felt himself nearer his release.
"Fuck, I'm cumming," he muttered, his hips retracting completely from you. His cock slipped out of you, a yelp coming out of your mouth when you felt him pull out.
"W-what?"
"Wait," he replied, his eyes screwed shut.
He shuddered visibly, the arms towering on each side of your head made the mattress around you shake slightly as he let out a muffled groan.
"Okay?" you mumbled as he pressed his chest on yours without lowering his weight on you, and his hand slipped between your bodies to guide his cock to thrust your warm walls again.
"Don't want to cum yet," he groaned and smiled shyly. "You're making it a bit hard for me, though."
"Sorry," you whispered.
A hand cupped his cheek and he shuddered at the affectionate touch.
Seokmin felt tired and sensitive from what had happened the night before. He pushed himself to a limit he didn't know he could reach.
The look in your eye, so filled with love and affection got him hard. He had never spilled more than two loads in one night, but he wasn't that surprised that it was you who pushed that limit.
Seokmin felt crazy about you. So utterly in love.
He felt so needy of you that he didn't care that his roommate was practically in the next room, and that the walls are paper thin.
His hips buckled, drawing a small moan from your lips which made him rush and seal your lips with a fervent kiss.
"Fuck this," he whispered, picking up the pace. "Be as loud as you want to, love. I need to hear you."
"What about–"
"I don't care," he said despite himself, and to make his point across, his hips slammed against yours firmly, knowing that would make you cry out in pleasure.
"Fuck, right there Seokmin!" you nearly screamed and then buried your face on the crook of his neck.
"What, like you're shy now, baby?" he purred, smiling adoringly at you.
"Yes," you whimpered, but still raised your legs from the bed, angling your hips for him to sink his big cock deeper inside you.
Seokmin chuckled in response and stopped pushing his hips, understanding what you wanted he pulled his body back and grabbed your legs, hoisting them up on his shoulders.
Then he pressed your legs against your chest and when his cock dragged in and out of your walls, you moaned lewdly again, tears instantly gathering in your eyes from how good his cock felt inside you.
"Like that, love?" he gasped, nearly cumming from your lewd cries.
"Yes, yes, just like that," you whimpered and gave him a clumsy nod.
And then, he started slamming his hips against you so hard and fast Seokmin had no doubt in his mind the noise of his skin slapping against yours travelled the whole apartment, and he partly hoped his roommate was using earphones so he wouldn't hear the lewd cries coming from you.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, Seokmin," you gasped, tears sprung from the corners of your eyes and rolled down your temples. "I'm cumming, please, don't stop!"
He kept his brutal pace, slamming against you without any care in the world now, hearing you cry out in pleasure as your walls started clenching erratically around his cock.
"Shit," he hissed through clenched teeth.
It took him a couple of thrusts to cum with you, seeing your parted mouth, your tears of pleasure, he knew he could no longer last. He groaned loudly, the raw sound reverberating across his bedroom and he pressed his hips against yours sloppily, cumming inside you.
Seokmin knew he was spent now. Spent and ruined. Ears buzzing. Fucking crazy. He eased your legs back in the bed, now parted for him to press his chest against yours to clash his lips with yours in a fervent kiss.
"I love you," he whispered into your lips, his heart beating with each syllable.
You stilled, and he swore he could feel you stop breathing for a second.
"You love me?" you asked in a tiny voice, your eyes brimmed with tears once again but now for a completely new feeling.
Seokmin pressed his forehead on yours, swallowing thickly. "I do. I have for a long time."
"I love you too," you whispered, your hands cupping his face to press your lips against his with a sob and then you broke into a small giggle.
Seokmin frowned slightly. "Why are you laughing?"
"You love me," you smiled despite your tears.
He pulled his head back, feeling deeply confused. "Why are you crying, then?"
"I wanted to say it first," you replied, pouting sweetly.
"Baby, you did. Last night," his frown only deepened. "You don't remember?"
You mimicked his expression, but you tilted your head to the side slightly. "I thought I dreamt it."
Then it was his turn to laugh, his forehead pressing on yours again to leave soft kisses on your lips.
But both your bubbles were suddenly burst when a door slammed shut quite loudly, making you flinch from the sudden bang.
"That was definitely my roommate," Seokmin scrunched his nose, feeling a little embarrassed.
"Do you think he heard us?"
"Oh baby, of course he did," Seokmin chuckled. "We weren't quiet at all."
"Did we upset him?" you asked meekly.
"No, I don't think so," Seokmin replied and slowly rose from your legs, pulling out his cock out of you. "That was probably his way of telling us that we're alone now."
Seokmin quickly reached for his phone forgotten on the floor and found a text from his roommate.
[9:21 AM] shua: a little warning next time? 🙂 [9:21 AM] shua: i'll be back by 5 pm [9:21 AM] shua: so take your precautions before i see something i don't wanna see [9:21 AM] shua: or hear something i don't wanna hear ever again 🙂 [9:21 AM] shua: kidding
Seokmin groaned in utter embarrassment. His roommate could be a bit of a tease sometimes, but he was glad he was so understanding, even supportive.
[9:23 AM] seokmin: sorry [9:23 AM] shua: no problem [9:23 AM] seokmin: thanks bro
"Everything alright?" you asked. Seokmin was still occupying the space between your legs, so it was all too easy to feel the stickiness from his cum starting to cool and turn watery.
"Sorry, baby," he replied, snapping his gaze from his phone. "Let me take care of you."
You laughed when he quite literally jumped from the bed and yanked his bedroom door opened and walked to the bathroom to turn the shower on.
"I think we might've ruined the sheets," you told him as soon as he was back and already carrying you in his arms.
"We can wash them," he shrugged slightly and gently lowered your feet on the bathroom floor. "That reminds me, your clothes are in the dryer."
"Do we need clothes?" you poked him in his ribs with a finger and he flinched with a laugh.
"Mm, you're right," he wrapped you in a hug, letting the shower stream drench your skin and your hair. "We have until 5 before my roommate comes back."
"What do you want to do?" you asked and Seokmin noticed the slight blush on your face.
You felt elated, so happy that you swore you could burst.
And he thought the blush looked cute on you, so he placed a kiss on your cheeks. "Whatever you want to do is fine by me."
"Can we... rest a little?" you replied with a smile. "I think I need to take a break from sex for a while."
Seokmin laughed breathily. "Me too. I think I will need a couple of days."
"I remember you told me you wanted to wait until we started dating before we fuck again," you quipped, arching an eyebrow at him.
"Mm yeah, and you told me we could start dating today," he replied with a grin. "But I guess we got ahead of it again."
"We kind of got ahead of everything two people a normal relationship would do," you sighed, circling his neck with your arms.
Your eyes looked at him fondly, and his heart caved in pure adoration over you.
"But I do want to take you on dates. On several dates," he pointed, leaning his head to kiss your lips softly."
"Are you worried we're moving fast?" you asked suddenly, your eyes shifting slightly from his.
Seokmin thought about it for a long minute.
He knew now that he'd been in love with you since university, you being his best friend and now lover meant that you both had to work to build an actual relationship.
But, how? You've been fuckbuddies for weeks now, you already told each other how you feel, so what should you do now?
"I'm not," he finally said. "I want us to work. I know we will," he grinned.
"Oh, yeah?" you hummed. "What makes you so sure, mister?"
"I love you," he replied simply. "And I will do everything I can to treat you right."
Your eyes glimmered and you smiled sweetly at him. "I love you too, Seokmin."
Seokmin returned the smile, completely in love.
"But I still want to ask you to be my girl on a date," he pouted.
"Shh, don't spoil it," you flashed him a grin and poked his rib again.
You both laughed and finished washing up shortly after that.
Being in love with your best friend has been an experience with many trials and errors. Mostly errors.
But Seokmin was sure that you could make it work, because you felt right to him. As if he'd been gravitating towards you aloofly in love until you both met each other at the right time.
And he was going to give everything to you.
"Soooo, are you two a thing yet?" Seungkwan asked one day when you two were closing the coffee shop.
"Nope, not yet," you sighed tiredly.
"What?" he pouted his lips. "Why?"
"Seokmin says that he wants to wait for the perfect moment," you confided in your best friend.
"Ah, that's ridiculous," he scoffed. "You guys are passed all that already."
"I know. Well, no. I think I should let him do his thing, because he wants it to be romantic, you know," you put in awkwardly as you walked home.
Seungkwan brushed his fluffy chocolate brown hair back with a sigh. "Well, I'm not one to judge."
Your eyebrows pushed up. "What? What do you mean?"
"Y'know, entering a relationship is important. The more I think of it, the more I understand Dk for trying to make it perfect," he shrugged.
"What happened to you?" you inquired with a laugh.
"I'm just saying! Aahh," he groaned annoyingly. "I'm trying to see things from your boyfriend's perspective, okay?"
You snickered. "He's not my boyfriend yet. But do go on, Mr. Boo," you quipped.
Seungkwan looked heavenward, as you two walked down the street and through the quiet night.
"We're just memories," he said softly, looking up at the moon. "I can't blame if someone wants to craft a perfect memory, even if they have to wait for that time to come."
The answer he gave you hung in the air and, surprised by the unexpected turn of the conversation, you nodded silently. As you walked side by side, the city lights created a soft glow, creating shadows that moved along the sidewalks.
The night was relaxing and soothed the fatigue accumulated during the long shift. Every step seemed to relieve the stress of the day, and the quiet company of your best friend gave you a comforting air of trust, it felt like talking to yourself.
"I want to quit," you said abruptly. "The coffee shop job, I mean."
Seungkwan let out a sigh. "Me too," he confessed.
"Why haven't you done it?" you asked, looking at his big doe eyes.
"I didn't want to leave you there," he nodded back to your part time work place with a hand.
"What?! I didn't want to leave you!" you exclaimed with a laugh.
"Really," he sighed and ruffled his hair once again.
"Let's quit together," you said and looked at the night sky too.
"Tomorrow?" he raised his pinky finger to you.
"Okay," you smiled and laced your pinky finger with his.
He seemed content and almost relieved.
"I'm going back to Jeju this weekend," he told you in a quiet tone.
"And you didn't invite me," you joked with a reproachful tone. "What are you doing? Visiting family?"
He nodded. "That and I have a debt to pay," he explained. "I'm singing on a wedding reception."
"Ah, now I see where the cheesiness comes from," you quipped and nudged at his shoulder with his. "Do you have a plus one?"
"No, you know I don't," he scoffed.
Your best friend has been single since you met him. Seungkwan wasn't the type to get that involved in romantic relationships, so you haven't had these kinds of conversations with him unless it's about your love life.
"You'll find someone, Kwannie. You'll see."
Dating Seokmin was a complete dream.
To say you got the princess treatment everyday was a complete misunderstatement.
Everyday, you got a good morning text and some days he'd be outside your building to take you to a restaurant to have breakfast with him, some days he'd be in your bed next to you, and you both cook together.
He would be waiting for you outside work sometimes and walk you home. Most nights he would sleep in. You had already made space in your drawers for his stuff, he had a spare toothbrush he left in your apartment.
Seokmin felt like an ant. Moving in your apartment slowly, bringing his things over yours one at the time.
You had the space and were eager to see him every single day, so you made no comment or inquiry about it.
And you shared mostly everything: you were both actors, singers, art lovers. There were no discussions and whenever a disagreement happened, you resolved it with little to no mishaps.
However, Seokmin hadn't popped the question yet.
No, not that question.
He just hadn't asked you to be official yet.
Sometimes you felt like it wasn't necessary. You practically lived together now, slept together at least three nights of the week and saw each other almost every day.
But in his mind, he was adamant on asking you one day.
That said, Seokmin discovered that he was a hopeless romantic.
He rang your doorbell, although it was completely unnecessary since he already had a key to your apartment. He just wanted you to open your door, to see your face lighten up when you saw him standing with a bouquet of flowers.
"For me?" you made puppy eyes as you grabbed the bouquet.
"Oh, not at all. I got these for myself," he laughed when you immediately pouted. "Of course they're for you, baby."
"They're beautiful. Thank you," you said smiling sweetly. "I'll put them on a vase."
He watched you eagerly turn to the kitchen and he couldn't help but smile.
"Are you ready?" he asked when you came back, still wearing a smile on your face.
"Yep. I've forgotten most of the steps though," you replied with a toothy grin which he loved dearly.
He made a show of rolling his eyes. "I'll teach you again," he motioned you over to him, extending his arms to you.
Seokmin had been helping you practice your routine for your new role, to the point that he had learned the dance steps better than you. He usually had no problem doing this, since he is a really good dancer.
But you made it a little challenging for him.
As soon as your hands touched him and you started dancing without music, your retracing your steps slowly, he couldn't help the irresistible tug in his chest.
"You do remember all the steps, baby," he pointed when you carried out your part of the choreography without stopping.
"I just wanted to practice one more time," you smiled shyly.
You were nervous about this particular role. It was pretty demanding, so you knew you had to be in perfect shape for it. You practice everyday, whether it was just your lines or the choreography, or the songs you needed to sing.
"We can practice with the music, if that makes you feel more comfortable," he suggested softly, grabbing your hand gently and the other hand flatly pressed in your back over the fabric of your oversized hoodie.
Or better said, his hoodie. You've slowly acquired his clothes, so he wasn't all too surprised when you used his clothes.
"Yeah, I'd like that," you responded and dropped Seokmin's hand to turn to your flat screen mounted on the wall and played the song you've been practicing the choreography to.
Seokmin grabbed your hand, but before he could position it for dancing, he pulled the oversized sleeve up your wrist. You smiled nervously when you saw the irked expression on his face when he couldn't grab your hand properly.
And by stopping to do so, you missed your cue.
"Sorry," you muttered and turned to replay the song.
"No problem," he responded gently.
Ever since you started dating, you hadn't had sex that frequently. You could count with your fingers the moments you two have been so weak you had to give into each other.
You were, according to Seokmin, trying to do things by the book. An idea which you had respected a ton, since Seokmin seemed dead set on it.
However, he couldn't resist sometimes but to sneak in a touch here and there, while you two were in close contact, like sleeping on the same bed or when watching tv.
Make out sessions here so hot and heavy that it made him feel lightheaded sometimes, resisting to you was one of the hardest, (no pun intended), things to do.
And that afternoon, he would have to exercise his patience.
The way you bit your lip when Seokmin's arm circled your waist as you practiced the choreography told him you were thinking the same. He knew you like the palm of his hand now, being so obsessed with you to the point he just laughed sweetly.
"Focus, baby," he muttered.
Your expressive eyes found his and you frowned slightly. "I am," you whispered.
"Oh, yeah?" his smile broadened.
"Ye-yeah, why?" you stuttered and you started to get visibly nervous.
Seokmin pressed his hand flatly on the center of your back and tugged you closer to his frame, making your eyelids flutter and your breath hitch.
"Seokmin," you breathed.
"Mm?" he hummed, you were so close to him that he could catch the sweet scent of your hair.
"Nothing," you mouthed and lowered your gaze to his neck, to the glimpse of his collarbones you could catch on the hem of his t-shirt.
"Your hands are getting sweaty," he commented, just to get that look on your face.
Completely flustered, you dropped your hands from his shoulder and the other from his hand to wipe the light layer of sweat on your palms, rubbing them on your sweatpants and darted a look at him.
Seokmin couldn't help but grin like a total idiot.
"What?" you mumbled with a tiny voice that denoted your nervousness.
You positioned yourself again for him to encircle you one arm on your lower back, the other hand gripping your sweaty hand tightly. But before that, Seokmin had to stop and pull the sleeve up your arm to uncover your hand to grab it properly.
"Nothing," he shrugged, already knowing what your answer would be.
"Tell me," you immediately blurted. "Please."
"Nope," he replied, making sure his lips would pop the 'p' in a playful manner.
"Seokmin!" you squealed.
"You're not focusing, baby!" he replied, mimicking your tone and then snickered. "You're thinking of something else and I know what it is."
"Oh, yeah?" you parroted him, making his smile stretch on his face more. "What am I thinking of then, mister?"
You and Seokmin weren't dancing anymore, the music played on, but your bodies were standing in the middle of your living room. Chest to chest, hands laced, heartbeat thumping so hard and loud that you believed for a second that Seokmin would hear it, or feel it against his chest.
"You want to kiss me, baby?" he teased with the shadow of a smile on his face.
"No," you murmured indignantly, egging him to continue dancing.
"We have to rewind the song now," he told you.
With a frustrated sigh, you went back and restarted the song and walked back to where Seokmin waited for you, extending a hand to you.
"This fucking thing," he muttered to himself, rolling the sleeve up your wrist again. "You know what–,"
You squealed and burst out in laughter when his hands took the hem of his own hoodie to yank it off your body.
"I want this off, now," he muttered frustratedly.
You didn't protest, in fact, you raised your arms all too willingly for him to take the hoodie off and threw it to the side. Only to let out a sigh in pure resignation.
"Of course," he mumbled again and looked to the ceiling. "Why are you naked?"
"What, you did this!" you squealed.
"I didn't know you weren't wearing nothing beneath it!" he chuckled and looked back at you.
"I can put on something, hold on," you blushed and started to turn towards your bedroom.
Only for Seokmin to grab you by the waist with one arm and turn you around to him, your chest hitting his earning a gasp from you.
And then, his lips clashed on yours, kissing you fervently, like a hungry man that's been starved for two weeks.
After the brief chaste kiss, he tossed you to the couch effortlessly. You yelped in surprise but your eyes told him this is what you wanted, what you were refusing to admit.
"Seokmin," you whimpered, your needy eyes roaming all over his frame.
He had been hitting the gym a lot lately, presumably to get ready for his upcoming role. But you intuitively knew that it was because every day when you woke up side by side, he had to quickly distract himself, and put all that unused energy into something else.
So his shoulders seemed broader, when he suddenly yanked his top off you noted his chest leaner, his biceps more bulky.
"Mm? What is it, baby?" he asked in a low tone.
You licked your lips hungrily. "I want you," you told him.
Seokmin smiled and got on his knees before you.
"And I want you," he replied, locking eyes with you.
"Then take me," you breathed with a whimper. "Fuck me, please."
You didn't have to beg this time like the couple of other times you practically begged him to fuck you and he couldn't find the strength in himself to reject you.
Because he wanted you. He wanted you more than he ever did anyone or anything before in his life.
His hands gripped the band of your sweatpants and yanked them off your legs, dragging your wet panties along with them and threw them aside on the floor.
"You're so hot, baby," he muttered gruffly, revelling at the sight of you.
The flustered expression on your face, your body wholly naked and sitting on the edge of your couch, looking at you impatiently.
Seokmin hooked his arms underneath your legs and yanked your body so that your legs were sprawled, angled open for him. He didn't give you the chance to reply to his compliment, because he quickly shoved his mouth down your cunt.
Your fingers found the back of his head at the same time you closed your eyes and let out a cry of pure pleasure. "Seokmin!" you whimpered.
His mouth was on your wet throbbing core, licking your arousal hungrily, his tongue stroke and laved in your wet folds, humming and purring sounds of pleasure with you.
"Oh, oh fuck," you whimpered when the tip of his tongue found your clit and started teasing at it expertly, trying to get it to swell. So he flicked and swirled at the sensitive bud relentlessly, knowing too well that would have you twitching and whimpering.
"Fuck, baby, slow down," you whined, tugging at his dark hair on the back of his head.
But he groaned, moving the hand underneath your thigh and removed yours from his head, and set both of your hands aside on the couch, locking his fingers with yours.
He didn't relent on his teasing, much as if he were trying to punish you to make him do this, skipping his rule. The past few times you've had sex it had been like this, frantic, desperate and needy.
But you were more than okay with that.
Seokmin released your clit from his teasing and flicking of his tongue and returned to lick your folds, darting meaningful a look up at you, linking his gaze with yours.
You nodded your head, signaling him that you were liking what he did and you wanted him to continue.
Because he was only licking your cunt up and down, you could catch the glimpse of one the corners of his mouth raising slightly in a triumphant grin.
And then he moved his mouth back to your clit again, just when it was starting to throb in arousal. Seokmin pushed it with the tip of his tongue gently, swirling around it, to then start sucking it, moving his head slightly to apply more motion.
Your legs started twitching from the tension building between them. The hand that wasn't clasped with his held on the armrest of the couch, your chest started heaving and you closed your eyes, savouring your sweet, blissful release.
"Seokmin, ah, fuck, baby," you gasped desperately. "I'm close, gaah!"
Seokmin hummed in your cunt in response, sending a soft vibration on your sensitive bud.
"Baby, I'm cumming," you whimpered lewdly before letting out a long high keen moan.
Your body contorted and shuddered, nails digging on the armrest of the couch as you cried out in pleasure, moaning his name over and over again until you were completely out of breath.
Seokmin showered your skin with sweet wet kisses, on your mound, on the soft side of your thighs, where he sucked gently to create hickeys on your thighs. And lastly, he released your hand to prop himself up and land a kiss on your mouth.
"I missed this," you admitted, giving him puppy eyes.
Seokmin blinked slowly with a lazy smile. "I missed this too, love."
You weakly lifted your arms to reach the band of his gym shorts and tugged them down. Seokmin stood up straight so you could do the same with his briefs. His big cock sprung free, it was hard and wet with his precum.
"Can I return the favor?" you asked darting a look up, at the same time you grabbed his cock at the base, pumping it a few times.
"Yes, baby. Please," he sighed desperately.
So you stuck your tongue out, and gave his cockhead a long stroke, picking the salty precum gathering on the slit, to then wrap your mouth around it.
You pushed your head forward and Seokmin let out a low guttural moan.
"Fuck," he muttered and placed a hand on your head, as if he were patting your head.
Then he slowly gathered your hair in a ponytail, his careful and lithe fingers gently handled your hair so that he wouldn't hurt you. The light touch of his fingers sent a shiver from the nape of your neck down your spine.
The head of his cock hit the back of your mouth and you breathed in, trying to adjust your mouth to the size of his cock. You moved your head back and tried once again to deepthroat him, breathing in carefully.
You started to pick up the pace each time you bobbed your head back, sucking on his length as if it were a lolly, remembering how much he liked that.
Seokmin had dropped his head back slightly and closed his eyes with a blissful groan. One hand gathered your hair sloppily, and the other caressed the side of your head gently.
There was nothing more arousing than the sweet sounds coming from Seokmin's mouth. His jaw was clamped tight, but you could make out the soft sounds coiling in his throat, making it bob slightly when you attempted to deepthroat him each time you pushed your head forward.
"Oh, oh fuck," he muttered in a low guttural town, his eyes snapped at you, breathing hard. "You take me so well, love."
You locked eyes with him, working your mouth on his cock rhythmically, your wet hand pumping the length you couldn't fit in your mouth.
"I'm cumming, fuck," he groaned and breathed out, small moans came from his clenched teeth, the hand gathering your hair tightened as spurs of hot cum spilled on the back of your mouth and you swallowed to the last drop.
He gently pulled out before giving you a small nod, a string of drool connected you to his cock and the sight was so arousing that Seokmin felt himself getting hard again.
So he made a motion for you to lie on the couch and you did, following your movements he slotted himself between your thighs, his chest pressed against yours.
"So good, to me," he muttered with a sigh.
He gently locked lips with yours, kissing you with so much love and tenderness that you nearly whimpered in his mouth, sending a shiver down Seokmin's spine from how sweet you sounded.
"Are you ready, love?" he muttered and you nodded with your head silently.
"'m always ready," you quipped with a grin.
Seokmin returned a grin of his own before grabbing his hard cock and guiding it to your wet core. You instantly flinched when you felt his cockhead nudging at your entrance, the anticipation from what was next had your breath catching in your throat.
Your hands grabbed him by his shoulders when he slowly started sinking his length in your tight walls, your mouth parted and involuntarily let out a whimper in a mixture of pleasure and pain from the slight discomfort of his big cock stretching your walls.
"Fuck baby, you're tight," he muttered and dropped his head on the crook of your neck as he groaned.
You moaned with a sigh and closed your eyes, your whole body alight from the pleasure. Being filled after weeks of not having sex felt so insanely good that your mind started going blank, just as Seokmin dragged his cock out and sank back in to his hilt.
Seokmin then started thrusting in you, acquiring a rhythmical pace that threatened to make you go insane. It felt so good, the drag of his cock in your tight gummy walls, the heat of his body, his low grunts muffled in the crook of your neck.
"Fuck," you breathed. "Baby, I'm close."
He raised his head and frowned at you. "What?"
"I'm close Seokmin," you whimpered.
"God baby, you're awesome," he grinned, dipping his head to wrap his mouth around one of your nipples, sucking at it while his hips diligently earned an orgasm out of you.
"Baby! God, I'm there," you gasped. "Fuck, fuck!"
Your walls tightened around him, making him moan around your nipple and he threw his head back to kiss your mouth just as you reached your second climax, but now on his cock. You came undone hard, waves of tingling bliss overwhelmed you completely, leaving you a whimpery mess.
Seokmin groaned, slamming his hips hard against you, his cock sinking deep in your walls as you stopped writhing from your high. You broke away from the kiss, breathing hard, your arms encircling his body tightly against you.
"Hi there," he muttered when you seemed to come back to your senses, blinking weakly at him.
"Hi," you breathed.
"Okay?"
"Perfect," you breathed with a sweet smile that made Seokmin's heart clench hard in his chest.
Seokmin smiled before dipping his head to give you a chasteful kiss on your lips, to then place open mouthed kisses down your chin, then your jawline and under it as his hips thrusted generously on you, gently moaning in your ear.
"Baby," you called. "Can I mark you?"
Seokmin understood the kink you had with marking him, he himself had one. But since your new role had very revealing outfits, he didn't have much of a choice but to land his lovebites somewhere no one would look.
Like, your thighs.
"Of course you can, love," he replied and added quickly. "Just in the chest, alright?"
You nodded and sucked at his beautiful skin where the position your bodies were in allowed you to. You sucked bellow his collarbones and seemed content with your work.
You ran your fingers through his dark hair, making him lift his head from the crook of your neck and look at you.
"I'm close," he told you with a puffy breath.
You cupped his cheek and he immediately kissed your palm.
Then Seokmin hooked one of your legs on his arm, hoisting it up his shoulder with your help, knowing what he was attempting to do. When your thigh was pressed up on your chest, he started sinking his big cock deliciously fast and deep inside you.
"Seokmin! God, baby, just like that," you cried out lewdly, feeling his cock impossibly deep inside your walls, the pacing of thrusts making it so good that your eyes brimmed with tears of pleasure.
"Cum for me baby," he directed with a low groan. "Cum again."
And to help you achieve this, one of his hands sneaked between your bodies pressed together, you shot him an alarmed look at his face when his thumb found your swollen clit and started rubbing at it fast, almost harshly.
"Seokmin, that's too much," you whimpered, but at the same time your muscles tensed up and you felt your climax rising up fast in your body.
"You want me to stop baby?" he asked breathlessly. "Or do you want me to give it to you?"
You clenched your teeth, tears ran down from the corners of your eyes to your temples as you squeezed your eyes shut, feeling all the tension from Seokmin's relentless thrusts of his cock and the teasing of his thumb on your clit finally tearing an orgasm out of you.
"Give it to me," you gasped. "Please, please, Seokmin!"
The corners of his lips rose in satisfaction. "Cum for me then," he purred.
And you did. Your body instantly obeyed with shockwaves of pleasure gripped your body, making it tremble uncontrollably. You sobbed in his mouth as more tears sprung from your eyes.
Then Seokmin followed, dropping his forehead on yours as he let out a low guttural moan of pleasure with you, slamming his hips a few times hard as your tight walls milked him dry.
He gently eased your shaky leg back to the couch and you hugged him tightly as he showered you with kisses again, on your cheeks, your forehead and your lips.
"So much for waiting," you sighed.
Seokmin felt too tired and too consumed by you that he couldn't make out a reply. He just rested his head on the crook of your neck to catch his breath peacefully, his cock still nestled inside your walls, one of your legs wrapped around him.
You enjoyed the quietness that came after. Seokmin usually was the one that sprung to aftercare first, or the one that seemed to come down from his high faster.
But this time, he didn't want to break away from you. He didn't have the strength to think about what was next.
"I love you," he muttered softly.
Being that the first thing spoken after fucking hard and passionately on your couch almost gave you a mental whiplash.
Your hands caressed his naked back and you hummed sweetly. "I love you too, Seokmin."
Aftercare followed some minutes after, you both showered together and as nightfall drew near, you grew hungry.
"Do you want to cook something or should we grab something out?" you suggested, putting on your sweatpants again and one of his black oversized t-shirts.
Seokmin smiled when you did that all too naturally.
"I'd like to stay here," he muttered, opening his designated drawer to get his briefs and another pair of shorts. "Where is my–"
"In the hamper," you replied before he could even finish. "We haven't washed whites yet."
So Seokmin wore a black tank top. "We have to designate a day for that," he muttered to himself and followed you to the kitchen.
"You haven't cooked for me in a while," you mentioned when he got there, you were bending down to gather something from the fridge.
He seized the baggy of baby carrots from your grasp and you whined. "That's because everytime I cook, you fill your stomach with these and you never finish what I do," he chuckled, grabbing a baby carrot for himself to munch on.
"Give it back!" you whined and he did with a grin. "That's not true. Well, maybe a little."
"You like my cooking?" he asked, patting your ass twice to gesture you to move from the fridge and he started selecting ingredients to cook something up.
"You know I do," you muttered. "You should stop feeling insecure about it."
"Roger that, boss," he quipped and kicked the fridge close.
"Is your hair still wet?" you asked when you felt droplets of water scattered on the floor on your bare feet, you looked up and found him innocently looking at you.
His hair was dripping a little, and he sighed a smile. "Do you want me to cook or not?" he grinned.
"Okay, but you're cleaning the kitchen too," you joked.
Seokmin rolled his eyes. "Fine."
You sat on the isle of the kitchen, trying to munch on more baby carrots quietly without him noticing.
And then, a knock came to your door, startling you from the abruptness. You jumped down to get it, parting the door just a few inches to sneak a look out on the hallway.
"Mom?!" you gasped.
Seokmin could've died right there and then. He stopped dead in his tracks, almost cutting himself with the knife he was using to slice some peppers and whipped his head around to swiftly look towards the living room.
Your clothes and his were still scattered on the floor. And Seokmin nearly flew to get them and run to your bedroom to throw them on the bed and went back to you, puttin on a hoodie to cover the hickeys that the tank top couldn't hide.
Your mother was already inside your apartment, and she had brought something in grocery bags.
"Oh, Seokmin! I didn't know you were here," your mother shot a knowing glance at you.
But your mother adored him, she wrapped him in a hug and patted his back gently.
Seokmin muttered a polite greeting to your mother and smiled at her sweetly.
"What are you two doing?" your mother's eyes narrowed on the abandoned task on the kitchen counter.
"I was just about to cook something, mom," Seokmin addressed your mother. "Would you like to stay and dine with us?"
You sighed silently at how masterfully Seokmin handled the situation.
"Oh, no. Don't let me steal your moment away," she brushed off. "I just came here to drop something off."
"What did you bring, mom?" now it was your turn to ask, and opened a bag to eye what was inside it.
"Cookies, your aunt brought them from somewhere in Europe. I can't remember, silly me," she laughed merrily and looked at Seokmin.
And his stomach dropped when he knew your mother's eyes had caught sight of his freshly washed hair. And then when she turned to face you, she noticed yours.
"Thank you mom," you said, completely allusive to your mother's silent sleuthing.
"Well," your mother clapped her hands together, and Seokmin knew her visit was originally intended to be longer. "I guess we'll stay in touch."
"You're leaving? Already?" you asked and pushed one eyebrow up.
"Yeah, I don't want to steal you and your boyfriend's home dinner," she smiled and wrapped you in a warm hug.
Your eyes widened in alarm and locked with Seokmin's.
The way your mother said the word 'boyfriend' came too natural. It wasn't suggestive in any way, and Seokmin started to piece everything in his mind.
Your mother hugged Seokmin and went out the door before you could stop her.
"Did you tell your mother we're official?" Seokmin inquired.
You slowly turned from the front door and scrunched up your nose.
"I might've," you mumbled shyly.
Seokmin closed his eyes and smiled. "Why?"
"Well, she knows you spend a great deal of time here with me and you know her," you sighed in resignation and started approaching him. "She started asking questions and I just had to tell her that we were official."
Seokmin thought long and hard for a minute.
"Are you angry?" you asked, looking at him innocently.
"No, baby. I'm not angry," he replied with a resigned sigh. "Well, your mom noticed that we both just showered and I'm not too sure she didn't see our clothes on the floor when you opened the door."
"Oh!" you gasped and looked back to the living room. "Did you get them?"
"Yeah," he scrunched up his nose too. "I think that she would've asked you anyway after seeing that."
"So... you're okay with my mom thinking we're official?" you asked with a tiny voice.
Seokmin grabbed you by the shoulders and pulled you to his frame, wrapping his arms over you.
"I think we should make it official," he muttered, looking down to find your face and pressed his lips on your forehead.
"Right now?" your eyes read his face.
"I think I waited for too long, baby," he replied. "There's no moment more perfect than the one we have right now."
"That's really, really cheesy, Lee Seokmin," you laughed out loud and he echoed you instantly.
"I know, it sounded better in my head," he muttered.
You smiled sweetly at him and he kissed your smile.
"So what do you say baby? Do you want to be my girlfriend?"
"I obviously do, Seokmin," you breathed before reaching to his face with your hands and kissing him lovingly.
His arms wrapped around you and reciprocated the kiss happily.
"Finally," you sighed with a small smile.
Seokmin couldn't agree more.
♡︎ a/n: hi everyone!! this is the last chapter of the backstage series! the main story is wrapped, but i'm going keep writing shorter side chapters for this fic because i really love seokmin sm and i'd like to continue writing for backstage hehe 💟
↣ next chapter is going to be a side chapter! (⸝⸝ᵕᴗᵕ⸝⸝)
so this chapter was supposed to happen before the city lights fic timeline, but i got carried away with that other fic and completely stopped working on my other projects. but here it is!!
anyway, that's about it for now, if you liked this, please do let me know? i'd appreciate a comment, a like, a reblog, an ask, anything!
love you all 💟
thank you to my backstage nonnie who gave me the support to write this chapter!! i love you nonnie! i hope you liked this i hope you are doing great 💟
₊ taglist: @aaniag @madein97line @cottoncheol @lilsafsafbooyah @amazzwon @honglynights @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @heaventcloud @peachescreamandcrumble @agustjinrecs @christinewithluv @jpanda003 ty ty ty lovelies ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ♡︎
#Jun edit — Ready To Love Behind The Scene Scrapbooking
jennifer anniston as rachel green f•r•i•e•n•d•s | the one with the east german laundry detergent
i hate when men are funny and kind and smart and silly and caring and pretty. stop it dude you're ruining my sleep schedule.
#Joshua edit — Ready To Love Behind The Scene Scrapbooking
#Jeonghan edit — Ready To Love Behind The Scene Scrapbooking
#Seungcheol edit — Ready To Love Behind The Scene Scrapbooking
Dokyeom edit — FLY (instagram grid concept)
Sara Sara by SEVENTEEn
Crossroads in Seoul
Pairing: Fiona Lee Yu Ying (fictional) x Lee Seokmin
Genre: AU, Romance, Chicklit, Mature
Status: On going
Link: Wattpad
Summary:
Fiona's the ultimate city nomad, going from Kuala Lumpur one day to some far-off place the next, all for the job she holds dear.
In the middle of all this hustle, her personal life's got its own set of hurdles. She's hanging onto bits of a connection that she kinda knew wasn't the real deal. But she's still holding tight, like it's hard to let go.
In all actuality, the life she's been living carved a hollow in her heart, a gap that's like a puzzle missing pieces. She's got this urge to start anew, to leave it all behind, but the unknown's a bit scary. And being alone again? Well, that's not a thrilling idea.
Then, boom, Seoul happens. She meets this guy with a heart of gold, a smile that could light up the night, and charisma that's practically electric. And guess what? In no time, he's her sunshine on a cloudy day. Love sparks, and it's like a mutual thing. But wait for it: Fiona's work gig there is just a month.
Talk about a curveball.
Warnings: alcohol, non-consensual, attempted sexual assault, suicide/attempted suicide, and mental health issue. If you are sensitive to anything mentioned, this story isn't for you.
Author notes: Hi, this is my first time posting some of my writing on internet. I have always writing some story over the past years, and this story is one of it. Only, I've adapted Dokyeom of Seventeen (Lee Seokmin) character into this. But not 100% similar to his behavior or personality as seen on screen, because that is not my goal. It's an alternate universe fanfic. There are times I'm in doubt of posting this, even now. But, if I don't do it, I wouldn't know right? So any criticisms will be well accepted. Without further ado, the background of this story are set between Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) and South Korea (Seoul). While it is adapting a real life experience, most of it have been changed to fit in the story better. It centered around the life of Fiona, a woman in her 30 facing her midlife crisis. Meanwhile, the other characters are mostly in their late 20s, working environment. Almost every chapter starts with the main character's point-of-view, and some parts are in third point-of-view. I also used some Korean terms, like ahjumma, oppa, unnie, nuna, and many more. I'll add in the translation in the text. It is not entirely a lighthearted story, but it is also not entirely dark. Everything I've mentioned in the warnings are handled with a great deal of sensitivity and care. With hope that I didn't offend anybody. Lastly, English isn't my first language here, but I tried my best. So I'm sorry if there is any grammatical errors. And I hope you enjoy.
230721 | scoups + thanks
Such a pretty human 😭 i love you…
230722 | dokyeom + don quixote
> vid credit: @namchyoon ♡
— i love you. i want us both to eat well.


