fallen angel || pjm
→ genre: angst, fluff
let me know what you think or request here
jiminie
love?
I missed you so much
I wish I could be there, with you in my arms
I'm sorry, I really am
But our work hasn't ended yet, we had extra interviews
Please say something
I'll come when it's over, once again I'm really sorry
It was 00:20 AM when he texted you. You read all of them without clicking it then you put your phone in a silent mood. You didn't want to hear any excuses from him. He promised you that today was going to be your day.
You planned this day way before. It was close to his comeback so his days were so full, he barely had time for himself. And as his girlfriend you tried your best to be okay about it. You'd always say ' don't worry jagi, just rest and we'll see each other soon' ' don't be hard on yourself' 'love you' 'take care's but today it was the 3rd time he'd postpone your special day, you started to feel worthless.
You missed him so bad even though you'd see his pictures, random videos he sends whenever he has time, loving messages. You needed him so much today. You had some bad news and you needed jimin to be your side. Even hugging him, hearing his soft voice, smelling his sweet yet sharp essence would make you feel safe, feel like home.
But here you were wearing a cute dress which is his favorite color, tears running down from your cheeks, hugging a pillow and try to stop your sobs. It wasn't his fault, it wasn't your fault but all of this situation made you feel so alone. You tried to stop crying by taking deep breaths. Then you saw a picture of you and jimin above the mantelshelf. You remembered that beautiful day like it happened yesterday.
Picture was from your first anniversary as a couple. It was a snowy day in Korea, you two and your besties were there with you. You both were cuddling after winning a snowball game against your best friends. He had his arms covering you, you had a big black puffer jacket but you looked small between his arms. He was looking at you with a gorgeous smile. Your eyes started to fill with tears again. You picked the frame and laid down to the couch you've been sitting. You cried yourself to sleep.
/╲/\
He came home at 3 AM. He used his keys and didn't make any voice, he knew that you'd be asleep. He came and see you sleeping on the couch messily. Then he saw the picture, his heart felt heavy thinking you cried looking at it. His guiltiness covered him for the nth time today.
There were some lights coming from your home's window.You looked like an angel. Like a fallen one he said to himself. Your nose and lips were pink and puffed. Jimin wanted to kiss every inch of your face, hug you tightly. God, he missed you so much. 'I'm a terrible boyfriend.' he thought. I can't even be with her when she needs me, I hurt her unintentionally.
He started to play with your hair softly, then he realized there's no blanket or something on top of you. He wanted to carry you to your bed but you were sleeping so peacefully. He went to find you a blanket and you woke up.
You didn't see his jacket on the small couch. So you went to get yourself a cup of water before you go to your bed. He saw the light coming from the kitchen, he put the blanket to a chair and came closer to you.
When you saw him, you felt butterflies and a small pain in your chest looking at his tiredness. You missed him more than you thought you did. In normal times you'd hug each other, kiss & cuddle all day. But you couldn't find the energy or the wish of doing it. He was looking into your eyes without saying a word, the guiltiness and the fear of hurting you more was stopping him.
"I know my apologies are not gonna fix this, I really don't know what to say __." he took a deep breath and looked at your empty eyes. You couldn't help yourself, you were hurt.
"You don't have to say something jimin. You seem tired, go sleep if you want. The food is here if you're hungry." Your anger was taking over you. Then you started to get the plates and chopsticks with your shivering hands and practically threw it to the wooden table.
"Do you want something else? Anyways you'll let me know when you're free. Don't worry, I'll be waiting. Like I always do." You tried to walk away but he held your arm, then he held your hands.
"__, don't. Don't walk away. All I need is you." he answered and wrapped his arms around you tightly, placed his head to your neck. Took deep breaths there."I felt guilty all day knowing I've broke your heart." His voice was sorrowful. It almost made you cry. You put your hands to his chest, not pushing him or anything.
He turned back to looking at you directly, cupped your face and made you look at him. Your teary eyes made him feel broken. "You're not the only one who's feeling missing, you have no idea how bad I missed you." Then he started to leave small kisses to your face between every word.
"Your face, your smell, your hands, your voice, your loving gaze everytime you're in my arms. Don't stay away from me, please. We'll fix this."
Now you were crying. You couldn't hold your tears any longer. Your tears were running down from your cheeks for the nth time today. But this time it felt like healing.
Your boyfriend shed tears too. Trying to sweep your tears away he said " If it's feeling you make better it's okay to cry. But don't do it too much, love." He kissed your eyelids.
You were feeling like home again. But seeing him cry made you feel bad. "I'm sorry too. I never mean to hurt your feelings but you know I can't help it when I feel broken." You said cupping his face, pulling him closer.
" I forgive you. To be honest I don't even stand a chance, my love for you is so strong."
You both kissed sweetly at first. Then he got you between him and the kitchen counter. He loved using his strength on you no matter what.
You started to play the back of his neck with your hands, you shifted your fingers on his hair while pulling him closer.
"Love you more jiminie and I forgive you too."
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