[mischiefmnged]

.⠀⠀ ݁ ༝ ⠀ 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓   𝒕𝒐   𝒔𝒂𝒚   𝑴𝑰𝑺𝑪𝑯𝑰𝑬𝑭𝑴𝑵𝑮𝑬𝑫   ,   𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒘𝒊𝒔𝒆   𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒐𝒏𝒆   𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅   𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅   𝒊𝒕                 ⟋         JUST WHAT THE RPC NEEDS, ANOTHER  STARTER  BLOG    .     𝑺𝑰𝑫𝑬𝑩𝑳𝑶𝑮 𝑻𝑶  𝑷𝑨𝑫𝑭𝑪𝑪𝑻   .              previously   gilliesmemes   .    

[mischiefmnged]

   𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐫    !     /    sentence starters based on all the things me &. my main cunts have said * sorta nsfw ?

just googled why my lip is violently twitching and its either coffee or a brain disorder.

you’ve heard of big mommy milkers now get ready for lil weenie creamies.

cannot stop fucking staring at abused children.

your whole existence is wrong.

head empty only piss.

Hͭ̈̓e̓ͨ͐y̐̔̏ ̌͗̍d̂̎̚a͗͋̋d̂̓̅d̈̆ͮy̋̍͗ ̆ͤ̓ṡ̎ͪú̎͌҉̫͟͝c̀̓̔҉̴̡̛k͒͌͆҉̡͘͜ ͦ̂̆m͗̒̄҉̷̰̹y̑ͮ̈ ̾̇ͮc͋̑͂oͯͦ̚҉̴̛͕cͬ̒̒҉̴̲̀kͤ͗ͧ҉͖̤͝

oh so when the cats have shiny glossy coats, they are "soft" and "adorable" but when i do i'm "greasy" and "need a shower."

we're fun misogynistic he just hides behind the fact hes amish.

“are the answers in science?” i mean yeah there’s a lot of ones there.

if you want me slobbin on a knob i only humbly request i get some eepy first.

the lorax should have been rated R and they should have had the onceler say "fuck" and trip out on benzos.

i'm going to give him cpr with my pussy.

OH SO YOU LIKE EVERYTHING HUH ?? YOU LIKE KICKING PUPPIES TO DEATH ??? YOU LIKE THAT SHIT DO YA ???

i can't wait to pull a kurt cobrasnake then you'll be sorry.

i'm too busy annihilating the slopes to fuck.

you already eat the body and drink the blood, cums just the soul.

what doesn’t kill you makes you sexy.

the ONLY reason i haven't disembowelled you yet is because you don't have organs.

you can take your pussys name in vain but god shall not be brought in.

CAME FOR THE BABY BOY ANGEL FACE, STAYED FOR THE UNHINGED DILF.

you want me to die so bad it makes you look stupid.

i’ll take the shot, get down ms president

bold words for someone in dildo mailing distance

maybe i was using love as in the gentrified term for FUCKING.

solidly convinced now that i didn't kill myself in middle school because of that one chocolate cake.

adios, useless child.

build a little cum house in your soul.

my body is a machine that converts cheese into pain.

you're my favourite schizo psychopathic freak.

my cunt is uncertain.

[mischiefmnged]

    𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐋𝐂𝐎𝐖 𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄   !     /    sentence starters pulled from various online train wrecks - all of these quotes come from HIGHLY controversial , horrid individuals on the internet . why am i doing this ? because it's funny .

"she was this close to hitting me with her car."

"do you have a fucking problem ? because i can fix it real quick."

"you are over here telling me to leave him alone but bitch, he's clearly blowing me up."

"i'm so sorry, i didn't mean to."

"i was trying to blow someone."

"73 dollars for a quickie, then i'll do it."

"you're being a bitch."

"you want beef with me but you're a clown and broke."

"where's your bread ? where's your cars, your 30k , your trailer ? get the fuck out of my face."

"i'm not entertaining this, you're dumb. this is bullshit ass shit, like, lame as fuck." "you're not even on my level."

"kill yourself." "i was just minding my business, trying to get what i need."

"because... wait, never mind."

"it's not my fault we were going in the same direction."

"they swear up and fucking down that i was following them."

"bitch, i was not fucking following you."

"and the - the bitch and the - and the - out the fucking door - "

"you won, you fucking won."

"the guy at the window was kinda flirting with me."

"i hate cardio" ( takes a bite out of burger )

"i have lots of money, i can buy love."

"tmi, but i spent all night in the bathroom."

"mhmm mhmm hmhm mmmhmm, i'm in the zone right now."

"yes, it's just eating, but it takes a lot of work."

"whatever, it doesn't matter."

"i threw up all over their wall."

"that bite was worth being fat for."

"isn't this like... lowkey prostitution?"

"i think the guy had a crush on me, he gave me three sauces."

"there's a reason six sounds like sex."

"i've decided not to give a shit anymore."

"i'm bisexual, i'm coming out today. lets get a coming out cake."

"am i gay ? no, i'm not gay, i'm part gay."

"when i was born i was dropped on my head."

"i wanna starfish all night long with you, baby."

"you're a lah."

"girly pop moment."

"( starts crying over seeing a quarter )"

"it's giving disease."

"we talked all day everyday."

"you think i don't have any tea on her ? come on !"

"i was unhinged, i regret a lot."

"people are saying i'm 'crashing out', i don't know, am i ?"

"am i acting hectic-cana ?"

"if you say i'm stalking... literally, no."

"oh, okay, we have a hypocrite on our hands."

"i've actually found out a lot about her."

[mischiefmnged]

𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐌𝐄𝐊𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐍 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐒 𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎      !     /    sentence starters pulled callmekevins playthrough of mile 0 , prequel to road 96.   change whatever you want to suit your character interactions .

 oh my god , what has he taken ?

now, lets hop in a strangers car.

your dog die or something ?

i might play video games instead. that’s how i escape my problems.

aha ! i found an escape.

i’m not really one for tourism in a country run by a dictator.

i feel a little on edge here.

i’m taking that threat at face value.

i need some chaos, everything has been too organized.

now we’re talking, explosives ! let’s get in there.

oh god, he’s very upset.

does he have that type of power, though ?

then the manger came out and said i was the best escapist they’ve ever seen.

yeah, tony hawk move there.

we’re killing a lot of people, this is great.

oh my god , you don’t know anything about personal space.

i will kill you immediately , that’s what friends are for - murdering each other.

i want it to seem like someone died in here.

that looks kind of crappy, to be honest.

what the hell is yours supposed to mean ?

yeah, they’re both equally good.

i don’t even know who said that, a ghost perhaps ?

i’m just so obnoxious.

can i just throw them in the trash ?

i don’t really wanna do this job , i just wanna get the credit for doing it.

forty seven people injured in town square, read all about it in tomorrows paper.

oh, i didn’t see you there.

ah ! oh , sorry... the corner scared me.

can you just give me a second ? i’m trying to rob you.

my kd ratio is insane.

i have been destroying the place with no reasoning just because i can get away with it.

maybe the government are lying.

we’ve been truman show’d !

if you didn’t believe the government didn’t engage in propaganda here, you’d be pretty fucking stupid.

i do ! i just agreed with everything you said !

annoying poster guy in the park is my favourite hobby. also , he’s dead.

i forgot to update you , i killed him earlier.

that is the lamest dare i’ve ever heard.

i dare you to jump off the building.

pretty ironic to say i found it in the dumpster.

i jump in trash and then he quits , like yeah i’m done with that one.

push him. push him off the seat so he falls into the mud.

you’ve probably never even seen your father.

look at his little stupid face about to go down in the mud !

yeah , sucks to be you kiddo.

he looks like a guy who a kid could just sneak by into our house.

oh my god , how did you run so fast ?

that is the creepiest thing you could’ve said.

i need the worlds gnarliest rumba that’ll just shred everything on the floor.

i kinda like this dude, he’s just so naive.

i’m just causing so much chaos all the time no matter where i am.

i feel a little bad.

he almost had another kill on his belt !

jesus , what a neighbourhood.

he’s a lunatic.

now what , are you going to try and eat me ?

i like the dramatized version.

tell me this secret of yours or i’ll push you off the building.

oh, look ! it’s the square where i murdered everyone , good times.

stop trying to force me to talk about things i don’t want to talk about.

i’m going to snap my own neck.

i don’t think it’s about whether the government did it or not.

i just always assume the government are up to shenanigans to be honest. 

that’s not how i thought he would sound for some reason.

that’s his memory of it ... then he’s also like and i was doing some sick kick flips and jumping over ramps while the explosions were going off.

was that not enough ?!

WHAAA - oh wait , i already knew that.

oh no, i’m going to get pulled into this aren’t i ?

no it sounds complicated for you. i don’t want to get involved in this.

yeah , she seems like a big fan.

she’s still waving , she’s still there.

he sounds pretty pissed off.

can i just walk away ?

i don’t think he’d make an announcement about that.

okay that was unnecessary , that was just demeaning. 

this is getting weirder and weirder.

this is getting a little bit stressful now.

i'm playing to win , i am not a good loser. actually no , i'm a very good loser  -  i'm not a graceful loser is what im saying... i'm a sore loser.

stop distracting me , i'm winning.

did you make a whole scale model of his house ?

seems reasonable , yeah lets risk our lives for this.

the cops are closing in , you're in now so we got to get this done tonight.

mom will help , don't worry.

i just think cops are so cool , those guys are really cool.

please let me go now.

anyway, time to go straight to ( name's ) house and break in.

i managed to ditch my parents, i'm ready for the revolution.

i play the triangle, i never said i was a singer.

your eyes aren't as wonky as your posters would suggest. 

my mixtape ! how could i forget my mixtape. 

do i actually want to help him ? i don’t want to.

these past twelve hours have been good to you.

why is he holding onto the receipt ... are they going to business expense it ? 

the problem is ... i know the file wont be there when i get up there.

i’ve seen enough loony  toons back in the city to know that’s a fake.

god the standards are pretty low here.

is this my entry test ?

y’know , personal revenge and all that.

i want to take the gun and just shoot him.

is this how he sees it ? well , no wonder he's pissed off.

we’re all new comers to this behaviour.

that was a bit stupid, wasn’t it ?

yeah , it is kinda lame actually.

what ? you abandoned me !

[mischiefmnged]

𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐔𝐌 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐈𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐇 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑    !     /    sentence starters pulled from the bullshit me and my mum have said, we are a very iconic duo if i do say so myself.   change whatever you want to suit your character interactions . trigger warning for weed refreneces . 

❛ please don’t sign me into an institution, i’ll never get out. ❜ 

❛ i’m a woman of god, but... ❜

❛ your teas should come with a free insulin shot. ❜

❛ woooow, your sarcasm is on point today. ❜

❛ okay, that was harsh, i’m sorry. ❜

❛ i don’t listen to you when i'm present here, why would i listen to you in a parallel universe ?  ❜

❛ i can’t die yet. i need to meet my vampire soulmate. ❜

❛ it’s official, i know far too much about you. ❜

❛ i’m the useless bisexual. not the bisexual that knows how to do maintenance work. ❜

❛ i don’t know what any of this shit means. ❜

❛ you can’t kill yourself, the council will try and profit off of it somehow. ❜

❛ i earned my son status today, i just felt my dick come in. ❜

❛ what the f - did your body just make that sound ? ❜

❛ before you, i had dreams - ❜

❛ it hurts to breathe ❜ / ❛ i know ❜

❛ when will people realise you can’t trust anyone ever. ❜

❛ i fucking hate everyone i’ve decided ❜

❛ are you high right now ? ❜

❛ how slowly am i moving ?  ❜

❛ you rolled and didn't tell me ? betrayal.  ❜

❛ you’re shouting. god can hear you in his study. ❜

❛ i hide my sweet stuff in the weetabix box. ❜

❛ i….yeah, right. yeah… wait, what ? ❜

❛ okay, i’m going to give you a minute before we converse, that was a shit show. ❜

❛ the awkwardness is really shining through today. ❜

❛ you’re pmsing, aren’t you ?  is that why you’re such a bitch today ?  ❜

❛ when i get cold i get violent. ❜

❛ why the fuck did you do that ?! ❜

❛ you never show concern for other people, so when you do, i worry ! ❜

❛ i feel like if i met you back when you were younger, you’d hate me. ❜

❛ i don’t ask for much and yet i constantly find myself disappointed. ❜

❛ would you hang out with me when you were younger if i was wearing this ? ❜

❛ i wonder how i’m still alive... then i think yeah, don’t pull at that thread. ❜

❛ so you came in and started talking to me... yeah what the fuck did you say to me ? i heard none of it. ❜

❛ everyone man their stations, its happening, it’s finally happening - ❜

❛ you knew i was there, thank you for at that at least. ❜

❛ it’s a fucking freakshow out there. ❜ 

[mischiefmnged]

𝐋𝐄𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐃    !     /    sentence starters pulled from the 2015 movie ‘legend’ starring tom hardy .  some lines may have been edited for better use,   change whatever you want to suit your character interactions . trigger warning for general gangster activity . part one of four .

❛ they’re bloodthirsty, illogical ... and funny as well. ❜  

❛ it took a lot of love for me to hate him the way i do. ❜

❛ how you doing, you all right ? got you a cup of tea here, you fancy it ? ❜  

❛ naught to sixty in, what, forty minutes, something like that ? ❜

❛ why don't you fuck off ? ❜  

❛ you know, i wouldn't want to keep you. ❜  

❛ nah, you're all right. i’m gonna walk, it's a lovely day for it. ❜  

❛ come on, i shall walk incredibly slowly for you. ❜  

❛ they won't talk to a policeman but they'll kiss a gangster ? ❜  

❛ you was a little bit younger then. you got all grown up, didn't you ? ❜

❛ who’re you ? ❜  

❛ what you got there ? ❜

❛ that's not any sweet, is it ? that's a lemon sherbet that is.  ❜

❛ being patient doesn't get you what you want, does it ? ❜  

❛ will you go out with me ? ❜  

❛ she's got a bit of class, mate. she's very elegant. ❜  

❛ he made his presence known. he was heavy footed, as they say.  ❜  

❛ i was drilling my eyes into the back of his head. ❜  

❛ i wasn’t even thinking it anymore. i'm not... i'm not even thinking. i'm broadcasting it. ❜

❛ you do realize, when he says that it means he has no fucking idea what he or you or anyone else is talking about ? ❜

❛ a lifetime's integrity down the toilet.   ❜  

❛ the queen would survive but god save the rest of us. ❜  

❛ i hope you know what you're doing. ❜  

❛ i've never seen a man so desperately in need of reassurance. ❜  

❛ we all like a nice little compliment now and again, don't we ? ❜  

❛ what I'm trying to tell you is that he's off his fucking rocker. ❜

❛ you've got glamour, you're like an east end starlet. ❜

❛ what you’re wearing doesn't matter. when people see you with them they'll think you’re a tart. ❜  

❛ so how come you're letting me in then, mate ? ❜  

❛ oh, hello, here's trouble. ❜  

❛ go easy. if he gives you any trouble, come and speak to me. ❜  

❛ everyone here knows you. ❜  

❛ i own it, it's my club. ❜

❛ well, you can get away with a lot in life if you keep your mouth shut. ❜

❛ are you going to take all fucking night, mate ? cause i’ve got things to do. ❜  

❛ you fucking little thieving cunt. ❜

❛ do you like being a gangster ? ❜

❛ i’ve just got bigger dreams than pushing a pram or haggling with the butcher. i just don’t quite know what they are yet. ❜  

❛ the center of the earth can be wherever you like. ❜  

❛ i could’ve been a boxer - but then i’d end up looking like some sort of potato, i wouldn’t even know what day of the week it was. ❜  

❛ i don’t owe the world anything.  ❜

❛ come on out, you got visitors. ❜  

❛ you don’t have a beer i can have, do you ? ❜  

❛ you think he looks beautiful and i got the face of a gorillas arse. ❜  

❛ stop doing your hair, get your stuff out of the car and do something fucking useful.  ❜  

❛ i’m homosexual - i’m a giver, though, not a receiver, there is a difference. ❜  

❛ i do believe that, you know. you should not hide what you are. you shouldn’t hide what you are ‘cause it’ll make you very sad, you know ? it’ll make you very sad, very unwell. ❜

❛ me and ( name ) are going to rule london. ❜  

❛ what are you doing on my reservation without my say-so filling up your canteen from my fucking watering hole ?  ❜  

❛ you ain’t got the bottle to do that on  your own. who do you work for ?  ❜  

❛ objection your honor, my client is an upstanding citizen. ❜

❛ objection overruled on the grounds its boring. ❜  

❛ oh well, fuck it.  ❜

[mischiefmnged]

𝐋𝐄𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐃    !     /    sentence starters pulled from the 2015 movie ‘legend’ starring tom hardy .  some lines may have been edited for better use,   change whatever you want to suit your character interactions . trigger warning for general gangster activity . part two of four .

❛ you daft cunt. ❜

❛ we’ve got to fucking sort this. ❜  

❛ woah, woah, woah . what the fuck ! ❜  

❛ i will fucking map you up, southie. ❜  

❛ no, no, no. go on, let him in. he’s only little.  ❜  

❛ how do we know that we’re going to be safe ?  ❜  

❛ well, that’s a little thing called trust, ain’t it ? ❜

❛ trust, eh ? you always got one bloke harping on about trust, don’t you ? ❜

❛ whoa, no. no, no, no ; right you, get him out of here. you, fuck off. ❜

❛ it’s a fucking rolling pin. who are you, fanny cradock ? what you gonna do with that ? you gonna bake me a cake ? you gonna sing me a song, watch me blow out me fucking candles ? ❜

❛ i come here for a proper shootout with some proper men, like colonel custer and geronimo. have you heard of ‘em ? no. ‘cause you were too busy in your pinny baking fucking fairy cakes, weren’t you ? ❜

❛ this lot are fucking nonces to a man. they’re fucking nonces. ❜

❛ get out my fucking way, go on, get out, fuck off. call yourself a fucking gangster ? ❜

❛ a shootout is a fucking shootout... like a western. wankers ! fucking embarrassing. waste of my time. fucking waste of my time. ❜

❛ he’s just generally disappointed with you. that’s all. ❜

❛ when you see him next, you tell him from me that i say ... fuck him, right ? fuck his brother and fuck that fat fuck that hangs out with him all the time. fuck your face, yeah ? and fuck the fucking lot of you. ❜

❛ you wont mind if i fight back, will ya ? ❜

❛ before we start, i got a little joke for ya. you’ll love this one - a paranoid schizophrenic, he walks into a bar ...  ❜

❛ what, are the americans trying to muscle in on us ?  ❜

❛ you say ‘our’ and you also say ‘we’ a lot, my question is, do we share the last name ?  ❜

❛ this is a very bad idea, a very bad idea indeed. ❜

❛ i say we meet these scum at the airport, we pick them up, we chop them up, put them in their fucking luggage and send them straight home, mate. ❜

❛ we can do your security, not a problem. but we don’t want to work for you, we’d much rather that we work with you. ❜

❛ no, i understand, we’re in your backyard, right ? ❜

❛ i’m glad we could make a deal, this feels right. ❜

❛ you got a lot of fucking balls to admit that, kid. you know what ? you got some fucking set of castagnas on you.  ❜

❛ you know what i say to that ? bravo ! salute, am i right ? what fucking balls. salute ! ❜

❛ you don’t understand, he’s not what you think he is, he’s really sweet !  ❜

❛ just because you have a boring life, doesn’t mean i have to as well. ❜

❛ as long as their health doesn’t suffer, high rollers love rubbing elbows with gangsters. ❜

❛ aristocrats and criminals have a lot in common. they’re both selfish, get bored easily and have access to wads of cash that they didn’t have to work honestly to get. ❜

❛ no one here has any interest in bourgeois rules or morality, mix that in with roulette wheels ? a stunning recipe for success. ❜

❛  as soon as you turn your fucking back. life, it just plays dirty tricks on you, you know ? ❜

❛ are you sure this is where you wanna be ? ❜

❛ fucking let them have it, don’t let them do you like this ! ❜

❛ did you know, its possible for a person to become a ghost while they’re still alive.  ❜

❛ i’ve heard you and that's your problem, that's your problem, not mine. ❜

❛ i want to build a city in nigeria, for the children - near enugu ! ❜

❛ did you know that enugu is the african word for utopia, did you know that utopia is the greek word for nowhere -  ❜

❛ do not meddle with the foolproof way of making the money.  ❜

❛ i am not a banker, i’m not a fucking banker!  ❜

❛ don’t you threaten me, you cunt ! don’t you fucking talk to me like that! ❜

❛ you will trot along down to the fucking back and you will fetch me my fifty thousand pounds ! ❜

❛ i may work for you, but i’m certainly not afraid of you - ❜

❛ this is prison. its the law of the jungle in here. ❜

❛ i promise you, this wont happen again. ❜

❛ life isn’t always the way we want it to be, life has other plans, it’s the way it is .. its life. ❜

[mischiefmnged]

𝐋𝐄𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐃    !     /    sentence starters pulled from the 2015  movie ‘legend’ starring tom hardy .  some lines may have been edited for  better use,   change whatever you want to suit your character  interactions . trigger warning for general gangster activity . part three of four .

❛ i love you. i’ve never loved anyone before but i love you. ❜

❛ i want to blown the soul out of that horn. ❜

❛ don’t fucking encourage him, for fuck sake. ❜

❛ how many titles could you claim ? superficialite, dripping in your synthetic opulence. it’s disgusting, it really is. ❜

❛ right, bit of magic - you love magic, don’t you ? all kids love magic. ❜

❛ you might be aware that there are three magic C’s in the word carpaccio. but, how many C’s are in the word cunt ? just you ❜

❛ what are you doing throwing stones at my window ? ❜

❛ i’m not being funny here, but the thought of your mum answering that door is a bit shocking, so. ❜

❛ you cheeky bugger.  ❜

❛ you didn’t tell me that it was this bad, did you ? ❜

❛ this place is going to crash when we get our tax bill next week. ❜

❛ hey, where are you going ?  ❜

❛ home at last, like agamemnon returned to ithaca. ❜

❛ where have you been ? it’s as if you returned from the dead. ❜

❛ what are you doing, mate. what are you fucking playing at ? ❜

❛ i’m not playing at anything. it’s you. ❜

❛ you just come in here, don’t say hello, don’t even have a drink, you just bugger off.. ❜

❛ hello, cheers mate. fuck you !. ❜

❛ what you shouting at me for ? ❜

❛ you had the world on a string but you couldn’t hold it together so you fucked it up. ❜

❛ i had to make do with what i had. ❜

❛ i wasn’t 'away’ i was in prison. ❜

❛ one of these days, your miserable life will swallow you whole. ❜

❛ you had everything, you had it all. ❜

❛ you can just fuck off. ❜

❛ you should know all about that, i have heard all the stories -  they’re not good, are they ? ❜

❛ your mum did palm us off with the damaged goods, didn’t she ?. ❜

❛ you’re very, very damaged, aren’t you ? ❜

❛ i want you to apologize right now. ❜

❛ the place is very empty - a bit like you, really. there’s fuck all in it apart from some random guys cock.  ❜

❛ you are a fucking disgrace, mate. ❜

❛ you hit me. ❜

❛ fuck sake - not - not the bottle, put it down !  ❜

❛ not the balls ! my fucking nuts. wanker !  ❜

❛ you biting cunt ! ❜

❛ never mess with a man’s jewels, mate. what the fuck - ❜

❛ you just don’t understand, you don’t understand me - ❜

❛ i don’t wanna fucking understand you. ❜

❛ it’s fucking hopeless. ❜

❛ go on, help me up, that fucking hurt by the way. ❜

❛ i am very, very, very fragile myself, alright ? very fragile. ❜

❛ that girls going to be the death of me.  ❜

❛ i don’t mind if you forget me. ❜

❛ don’t tell me what i mean, i know what i mean. ❜

❛ he’s not always like that, he’s got a heart of gold, he loves you to bits and he thinks the world of you. ❜

❛ it’s what happens sometimes. families are stupid, they fight, they make up and ultimately they stick together because they love each other. ❜

❛ all alone ? there’s no need to be ~ ❜

❛ i thought the orgy was the sticky bit, it gets sticker still ?  ❜

❛ what exactly are you doing about it ? bugger all by the looks of it. ❜

❛ i’ll get you a sock full of coal, you lucky thing. ❜

❛ i’m sorry, i can’t look at you darling, i’ll get lost in your eyes.  ❜

❛ i don’t care about the truth, except that the greater the truth the greater the libel.  ❜

❛ why you  here then ?  ❜

❛ i’ve come to see the difference between you and me. ❜

❛ i grew up poor, like  you, i boxed as a lad, like you - didn’t turn me into a thief. ❜

❛ but you did turn to policing, didn’t you ? it turned you into handing your own over at the bar, didn’t it ? ❜

❛ the difference between us, apart from the obvious, i work for me - you, you work for them. ❜

[mischiefmnged]

𝐋𝐄𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐃    !     /    sentence starters pulled from the 2015  movie ‘legend’ starring tom hardy .  some lines may have been edited for  better use,   change whatever you want to suit your character  interactions . trigger warning for general gangster activity . part four of four .

❛ she’s wearing black, that fucking bitch. ❜

❛ i see myself, i see what i could be... ❜

❛ are you absolutely sure you want to go through with this ? ❜

❛ i know love is not an answer to anything, but love is a witness -  ❜  

❛ fucking sing. ❜

❛ the pantheon has stood for 2,400 years. his promise to me ? it lasted two weeks. ❜

❛ you were drunk as a skunk waving around a shotgun.  ❜

❛ i spiced the evening up for everyone. ❜  

❛ you can’t even make a decent cup of tea -  ❜  

❛ you look like a budgie in that dress. ❜  

❛ the rag and bone man wouldn’t pick you up if you were laying in the gutter.  ❜  

❛ i left without saying goodbye ... it was a small, sad victory. ❜  

❛ sleeping pills help sometimes, other pills helped other times. ❜  

❛ they’re like a friend who holds no judgement and only want to be loved in return. ❜  

❛ mothers little helpers... very well named. ❜  

❛ i’ll fucking serve you up, you fucking cunt ! ❜  

❛ you fucking pain in the fucking arse and fuck your fucking brief case ! ❜  

❛ you can kill me and i can kill you, that way, we’re both fucking dead ! that’s a genius idea.  ❜  

❛ listen to yourself, you’re fucking nuts. ❜  

❛ people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. ❜    

❛ in our line of work, it’s not good to be famous. being anonymous is the goal. ❜  

❛ what exactly are you asking me to do ? ❜    

❛ there’s nothing i can do.  ❜  

❛ you say that one more time, i’m going to hit you. ❜    

❛ don’t say anything. it’s alright. ❜  

❛ can’t you handle it for yourself ?  ❜    

❛ you come in here with your fucking nose and your tea - your fucking exotic tea and you say that. ❜  

❛ this matter, i’ll deal with it for ya.  ❜    

❛ i didn’t say anything about killing anyone.  ❜

❛ there’s death in your eyes and you’re fucking threatening me ? ❜

❛ you’re not laughing now, are ya ? ❜

❛ are you mad ?  ❜

❛ don’t moan about it. it’s done now.  ❜

❛ you are fucking unbelievable.  ❜

❛ will you be useful for once and when you take off his shirt and trousers tonight, take ‘em out back and burn them.  ❜

❛ you got plenty of trouble if what they’re saying is true. ❜

❛ what about your loyalty to me is that not a measure ? ❜

❛ no wonder you’re not making any sense, you’re popping pills everywhere.  ❜

❛ what you’re saying is that in order for us to be free... we all have to be on our own ?  ❜

❛ fuck your mum ! ❜

❛ i wish i could make you go away. ❜

❛ it surprises me that some people still manage to survive these days. ❜

❛ it looks a bit fucking fucked to me, mate. ❜

❛ speaking of, you look like shit n’ all. ❜

❛ sometimes to achieve greatness, you have to cut off little pieces of yourself no matter how much it hurts, in order to grow, in order to move on. ❜

❛ to be honest, i think you’re getting out just in time. ❜

❛ sooner or later, someones going to talk and it’s going to all be over.  ❜

❛ i think god ought to cut us some slack, don’t you think ?  ❜

❛ that is bang out of order.  ❜

❛ we shall just have to see what happens when we get to heaven.  ❜

❛ you have the ability to see in to the future, the same as me.  ❜

❛ i haven’t seen you like this in a long time, i forgot how delicate you were.  ❜

❛ go inside and put the kettle on.  ❜

❛ i want you to remember that i existed - always, that i once walked beside you. ❜

❛ it’s something you say out of loyalty - to something that didn’t exist in the first place. ❜

❛ please let me make amends. please, please. ❜

❛ ibiza... let’s go there i like the way the word sounds. ❜

❛ god doesn’t ask if we accept this life. there is no choice, life is forced upon you. the only choice is how you live it... or not, that’s a choice as well. ❜

❛ a cup of tea can solve everything. a bit under the weather ? tea. you left your husband ? tea is the answer.  ❜

❛ god had finally cut me some slack.  ❜

❛ what do you do when the only person who could ever get to you is gone. cup of tea ? i don’t think so. ❜

❛ don’t stand around here like some sort of lamppost. ❜

❛ go on put it in your fucking pocket, we all know you ain’t got any money. don’t be daft. ❜

❛ you killed her and your hundred pound a week on flowers wont bring her back ! ❜

❛ before i talk, i want my safety guaranteed.  ❜

❛ oh, fuck off, soppy bollocks.  ❜

❛ cheer up, twinkle toes, its nearly christmas. ❜

❛ encase you haven't realized, i don’t fucking answer to you, sweetheart. ❜

❛ what the fuck were you thinking ?  ❜

❛ you got a tin of worms in your head, mate.  ❜

❛ you’ve got to be joking, are you fucking joking ? ❜

❛ go on, say her name again, say it - ❜

❛ why would you do that ?  ❜

❛ i can’t kill you. no matter how much i fucking want to. ❜

❛ what the fucks wrong with you ? you kill a geezer in a room full of people, are you fucking mad ? ❜

❛ the world is quite like london... it’s not good, it’s not bad - it just is. ❜

❛ it’s just your own lonely code, until your race is run. until the end. ❜

[mischiefmnged]

i come here . post a shit load then leave for a year and im soo valid

[mischiefmnged]

   𝐖𝐇𝐘 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃𝐍'𝐓 𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐊    !     /    sentence starters pulled from a red dead redemption 2 video titled ‘why john and arthur shouldn’t drink.’ some lines may have been edited for better use.   change pronouns and whatever you need to suit your characters  

❛ there he is, the man with the goddamn plan ! ❜  

❛ are you the woman i got with child ? you’re a little older... hehe, more boring too. ❜  

❛ oh my darling, oh my darling, oh my darrrlling clementine ~ ! ❜  

❛ sonuva bitch . oink oink .  ❜

❛ don’t look at me  ❜  

❛ i’m drunk, so what ?  ❜  

❛ what are you gonna do ? too late to stop me now. ❜  

❛ how’d you get that scar again ?  ❜  

❛ you’re drunk AND picking a fight ? ❜  

❛ hey, i just forgot.  ❜  

❛ careful i don’t step on ya. always under my feet. ❜  

❛ you’re a lazy bastard ... and a drunk. ❜  

❛ i can’t be quit of you, can i ? ❜  

❛ oh suzanna wont you cry for me, i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee ~  ❜  

❛ you freeloading old panderer.  ❜  

❛ you are four sheets to the wind, knock it off.  ❜  

❛ creepy old sack of shit. ❜  

❛ if it isn’t the angel of misery. removing all the joy from our lives.  ❜  

❛ i think its best you lay off the drink. ❜  

❛ hey come on, she hasn’t done nothing. ❜ 

❛ it’s best to ignore him when he’s like this, dear. ❜  

❛ c’mon , stop sleeping .  ❜  

❛ calm down i’m just playing, i’m just kidding, ain’t that serious. ❜

❛ you leave that dog be. ❜  

❛ have you even spoken to another human or just the little voices in your own head ? ❜  

❛ don’t carry on with him like that.  ❜  

❛ you really love yourself, don’t you ?  ❜

❛ y’know, everyone laughs at you, just being honest. ❜  

❛ stop annoying me, woman. ❜  

❛ i see you judging me ❜  

❛ don’t be like your father, son.  ❜  

❛ oh, i’m ready to beat on your skull.  ❜  

❛ i think i’m drunker than you .. if that’s possible. when you’re sober you’re probably drunker than this. ❜

❛ everyone hates you.  ❜  

❛ awh, shut up. ❜  

❛ i think we made some enemies. ❜  

❛ did somebody lose an idiot ? ❜  

❛ look at this dumb donkey. ❜  

❛ shut it, you’re drunk. ❜  

❛ you’re wrong. i’m worse than you think. ❜  

❛ you’re a boring bastard sometimes and by sometimes i mean all the time. ❜  

❛ its a walking talking moron.  ❜  

❛ strange kid ... real strange. ❜  

❛ i better drink up before you finish it all.  ❜  

❛ yeah well , look’it you ! ❜

❛ you drink for ten men and shave for twenty. ❜  

❛ you ever miss your days as a working girl ? ❜  

❛ you sound like you’re half fit to fall over. ❜  

❛ hey, hey what did i say ?  ❜

❛ no wonder he keeps trading in for a younger model. ❜  

❛ just drink and be merry, wont you ?  ❜  

❛ look, if i don’t ignore you, i’m going to hit you. ❜  

❛ you live in a dream world. ❜  

❛ smile. your face wont crack . ❜  

❛ when did you get so sour ? ❜  

[mischiefmnged]

i made a cheeky little call out post for myself .  this is a call out for me and my stupid brain never being able to focus on one thing .  can i get an amen for those who do the same shit ? 

[mischiefmnged]

𝐒𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐑 𝐎𝐏𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐒  !     /    sentence starters pulled from a brief gag from the justin roiland animated series ‘ solar opposites ‘  -  everything here has been taken from the website ‘lessonalyzer.’  some lines may have been edited for better use.   change whatever you want to suit your characters .

❛ people who think they have good voices always do. keep singing !  ❜

❛ when giving a high five, look at the other person's elbow. same thing works for kissing. ❜

❛  if it looks like a shlorduck, swims like a shlorduck, and quacks like a shlorduck, then it probably is a shlorduck.  ❜

❛ wash your hands for at least a hundred seconds. ❜

❛  if you're ever on fire, stop, drop, and roll. then stop again when it's out. ❜

❛ snitches get stitches. ❜

❛ always bring milk with you to a protest in case you get pepper sprayed. ❜

❛ soft bristles, gentle brushing. the firm bristles are going to mess up your enamel.  ❜

❛ always double cleanse. ❜

❛  every meeting can be a phone call and every phone call can be an email. ❜

❛ if it's your turn to freestyle, don't steal a verse you heard on the radio. rap from the heart, yo. ❜

❛ yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift, that's why they call it the present. ❜

❛ your parents got a house for two acorns and a handshake. it's okay that you're still renting.  ❜

❛ don't make one genre of music your whole thing. ❜

❛ high yield savings accounts are a joke. ❜

❛ always salt your pasta water generously before it comes to a boil. ❜

❛ restart your computer every once in a while. ❜  

❛ he who cannot be a good follower, cannot be a good leader. ❜

❛ ass, grass, or gas. nobody rides for free. ❜

❛  i before e except after c, sometimes . ❜  

❛ your parents were once hot. food for thought. ❜

❛ if you love something, let it go. if it comes back to you, it's yours forever. if it doesn't, then it was never meant to be. ❜

❛ don't count your chickens before they hatch. ❜

❛ money isn’t everything but it’s still very important. ❜

❛ you know when to hold 'em, but also you must know when to fold 'em. ❜

❛ buy bitcoin 10 years ago. ❜

❛ always set your clock 5 minutes early.  ❜

❛  never drink from a public water fountain without checking all your angles. ❜

❛ if it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down. if it's crying: oh no. ❜

❛ make sure someone is looking at you before you throw something to them. yelling 'heads up' just isn't enough. ❜

❛ tv writing is not for the faint of arms, neither is regular writing.   ❜

❛  condoms expire. ❜

❛ dance like everyone is watching.  ❜

❛ trust no one. ❜

❛ if i can change, and you can change, we all can change. ❜

❛ a man who has friends is a rich man indeed. just not with money. ❜  

❛ clout is king. ❜  

❛ never leave the house without an amulet that's been blessed by a witch. ❜  

❛ thaw the turkey before you put it in the deep fryer. ❜  

❛ find a job you enjoy doing with dogs and you'll never work a day in your life.❜  

[mischiefmnged]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐋𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃: 𝐁𝐀𝐃 𝐋𝐈𝐏 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆   !     /      sentence starters pulled from the legendary youtube channel ‘bad lip reading’ from their walking dead series .  some lines may have been edited for better use,   change whatever you want to suit your characters.   nsfw humor ahead,  brief drug mention .

❛ i hate that freakin’ turtle ! ❜

❛ well i might just do an evil drive by on [ name ]  ! ❜

❛  you keep away from my turtle, got it ? ❜

❛ ugh, he’s mushy ! ❜

❛  oh yeah ? you get no birthday ! ❜

❛ there’s a party and you can’t come, hows that ? they’re gonna have flaming cars and trailer folks and shrimp dogs and pizza ! ❜

❛  oh no no no, oh no, oh dang it ! ❜

❛ you don’t even get to touch the blind kid !  ❜

❛ excuse me, sir ? i need to get in, but i can’t. ❜

❛  you wanna see my sticks ? ❜

❛ oh, i have a creepy cat. it’s pretty rad you should come check it out. ❜

❛ sorry dude, when i come back from your place there’s always a little roach in my slender man undies. ❜

❛ you can’t just torch a windmill, dude.  ❜

❛ oh yes i can, later tater. ❜

❛ you what ? you gotta say your words right. ❜

❛ listen shorty, you can’t do this the whole week. ❜

❛ oh my bad, sorry, ey sorry, im sorry. ❜

❛ this is where the kids come to drown. ❜

❛ i grew up with a pig, they’re real clean. ❜

❛ world war two ended. i mean excuse me sir. ❜

❛ mr potato head likes to punch me. ❜

❛ i need a guy that’s got like eyes and legs... ❜

❛ you ate that apple ? man, that was my apple. ❜

❛ well he found it.  ❜

❛  so what, you just go around eating random apples ? ❜

❛ i have one thing that dolphins have and that’s a sense of discovery. ❜

❛ he’s talking about dolphins when the subject matter was [ subject ] ! ❜

❛ hey i get it man, dolphin ain’t the same as apple.   ❜

❛  in fact, apples aren’t really good for dolphins ❜

❛ i’m gonna say hi to the guy with the knife ~ !  ❜

❛ hey listen,  i think that [ name ] is weird, what do you think ? ❜

❛ she got a booty so nice you pitch that twice. ❜

❛ little cookie man never waved to me, so he got knocked out ❜

❛ you’ll get a funeral if you don’t wise up and call me. ❜

❛ i just placed the order, how can they be here already ? ❜

❛ ew, nu uh ! ❜

❛ he’s afraid.❜

[mischiefmnged]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐋𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃: 𝐁𝐀𝐃 𝐋𝐈𝐏 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆   !     /      sentence starters pulled from the legendary youtube channel ‘bad lip reading’ from their walking dead series .  some lines may have been edited for better use,   change whatever you want to suit your characters.   nsfw humor ahead,  brief drug mention . 

❛ sweet baby, no ❜

❛  listen i’d rather you not smoke weed. ❜

❛ but you know im going to, right ? cool, later dude ! ❜

❛ whats that smell... why do you smell like old people ? ❜

❛ dude just stick around and i’ll get you drunk. ❜

❛ there ain’t a man alive that doesn’t want to get his butt washed in the jedi fountain. ❜

❛ not now princess. ❜

❛ a vagrant child came to me when i smashed my knuckle. guess what he asked me. ❜

❛ whats your favorite movie ? ❜

❛ i could kill you. ❜

❛ son of a - seriously, who puts a railing right there ? ow - ❜

❛ you like that ? i wrote it.  ❜

❛ ow, oww. hey, you just stabbed me.❜

❛ you’re so sweaty. ❜

❛ ‘cus i’m suffering. ❜

❛ i have a kitten that always laughs when you hold it and sniff it’s legs, and it’s just great for a party when you can’t mess around and it’s name is Crazy Bennigan. ❜

❛ dude, like, that’s a weirdo kitty. ❜

❛ well, it’s definitely expensive.  ❜

❛ do you think it could be magic ? ❜

❛ why aren’t you magic... you’re supposed to be magical. ❜

❛ this dork made you eat a stump ! ❜

❛ now listen kids, don’t think you can just squirt your loogies on the floor. ❜

❛ now wiggity woah daddy. ❜

❛ i hope you’re not afraid of owls because i’m getting you one.  ❜

❛ owls are the reason that god didn’t make us people with foam hair, that’s common knowledge.❜

❛ wait what are we doing here, wait what ? ❜

❛ well, it’s time to rob a stage coach.  ❜

❛ there’s something i wanna tell you... i don’t like doorbells. ❜

[mischiefmnged]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐋𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃: 𝐁𝐀𝐃 𝐋𝐈𝐏 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆   !     /      sentence starters pulled from the legendary youtube channel ‘bad lip reading’ from their walking dead series .  some lines may have been edited for better use,   change whatever you want to suit your characters.   nsfw humor ahead,  brief drug mention . 

❛ hey, wanna know what animals i like ? sharks and skunks. ❜

❛ listen you pretty redneck -  ❜ 

❛ brother, you got skill like an english kid. ❜

❛ man that’s not fair, all i have is guitar and you get a banjo ? ❜

❛ are you ready or do you need something else before you start ? ❜

❛ my lips are so sore already. ❜

❛ a woman thug stole my banjo, do you have a new one ? ❜

❛ i got cheeta candy... it’s pretty gross. ❜

❛ oh, you’re bleeding... on me... ❜

❛ you know, a fish can hear you thinking just before you sneeze. ❜

❛ i need a man that can decorate and mix my brew. ❜

❛ i’ll wash the dog but you’re washing the laundry. ❜

❛ no, i’m not gonna be your sexy beef friend. ❜

❛ knock, knock ❜ /  ❛ whose there ? ❜ /  ❛ why don’t you zip it ❜

❛ he said dreet and i’m about to freak out. ❜

❛ are you jim, or are you mark ? ❜

❛ remember that costume party, you went as a penguin and i went as a pink shark... did you see the teeth ? ❜

❛ i would like to go now. ❜

❛ candy canes wreck yalls bowels. now, is that a problem ? ❜

❛ hey papi. ❜

❛ you just like me for my weed. ❜

❛ i once new a kid, his tongue fell off in his sleep. ❜

❛ i just found out we just missed halloween. ❜

❛ i always wanted a wookiee but i found out they weren’t real. thanks for nothing george lucas. ❜

❛okay, it’s getting old, come on now stop it. ❜

❛ and that’s how they do it on broadway. ❜

❛ you shouldn’t have glued a wig on that mannequin. ❜

❛ did i just hear that right ? you glued a beard. ❜

❛ yeah but you’re not the glue police, i am. ❜

❛  i don’t think that’s a thing, that’s not a real thing you can be. ❜

❛ if we could play pool we could shoot. it would be really fun, then finally i’d be able to get my stick engraved. ❜

❛ what would it even say ? ❜

❛ ya’ll ready to be naughty ? ❜

❛ ah, okay. yeah, you’re the stuff of bad dreams. ❜

❛ hey i get it, you’re here to kill. ❜

❛ yeah i’m gonna go, sorry demon ! ❜

[mischiefmnged]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐃𝐃 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐎𝐔𝐓   !     /      sentence starters pulled from the halo : legends,  spartan 1337 the odd one out .  some lines may have been edited for better use,   change whatever you want to suit your characters.

“ … what ? he slipped and fell ?! ”  

“ you think he’ll be okay? " 

” this kind of thing happens all the time. “

” he’s been trained with the best of them, there’s no need for concern “

” it wouldn’t be the first time he fell off a pelican. “ 

” still, i’m a little worried. “ 

” yeeeah… “ 

” oh no “ 

” hey, wait for me ! “

” come back, don’t leave me behind ! “

” hey look at that, it’s the junky robot that fell from the sky. “

” even if you don’t want to know, i’ll tell you who i am anyway - “

” i am one of the strongest warriors in space ! “

” i wouldn’t stand there if i were you. “

” it’s not very safe. “ 

” how dare they ignore my awesome heroism “ 

” fear not, i am the stronges – oh no. “

” *muffled cries of help* “

” he doesn’t really get along with strangers all that much “

” no not over here, he’s over that way. he’s over there, don’t harm me go that way! “

” i need a vacation. “

” i thought i told you to stop following me. “

” there sure is a lot of junk falling from the sky today. “

” its dangerous, get out of here, as far as you can ! “

” oi, stop it, stop it “

” anyone know what that thing is out there? “

” it looks like he nearly blew up the whole mountain range.“

” he fell from the sky, then all of a sudden he and this big monkey thing started going nuts ! “ 

” why would you say that ? give me some credit, will ya. “

” it must have been scary, are you sure you’re okay? “

” i’m kinda hungry. “ 

” i’m not gonna lose, no way can i lose, i am [ name ]  !“ 

” no one else will say it, so i will. the fact that i never give up is one of my good points.“ 

” apparently they used to fly across the stars with that. “ 

” this is my fight. “ 

” you know what ? i’m one heck of a mama myself “

” i did it… i did it ! “ 

” less talk, more action! “ 

” this isn’t good, he wont budge. “

” we’re totally screwed. “

” we’re doomed. “

” WELL DON’T JINX US ! “ 

"i’m just kidding… we gotta do something… OH HEY WHAT THE HECK IS THAT !? ”

“oh as if he’d ever fall for that ! ”

“ now lets get outta here " 

"woah, whats happening?! no way… ”

“there’s a another ai living on this planet, i lost contact with it…”

“ she seems… happy, if i’m understanding correctly… she seems happy here. ”

“ we’re home ! ”

“ you’re not going to believe what happened today. ”

“ what did you do back there? ”

“ roger that, but i may run a little late. ”