Joe’s short shorts appreciation post. The Old Guard - Force Multiplied #5

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Joe’s short shorts appreciation post. The Old Guard - Force Multiplied #5
Catchy choruses, key changes, solid bridges, yassssss🔥🔥🔥
So 3 diff YouTubers I follow have posted videos about KPop Demon Hunters & jfc are they right - these songs are bangers! The art & story are great, but I'm going to have to commit this soundtrack to memory before I can really take in the story. Also, the voice cast includes Daniel Dae Kim, Ken Jeong AND Lee Byung-hun. How am I hearing about this from YT creators who don't cover anything like this instead of seeing it flooding my dash????
From the moment I saw the premise of Heads of State: "The UK Prime Minister and US President have a public rivalry that risks their countries' alliance. But when they become targets of a powerful enemy, they're forced to rely on each other as they go on a wild, multinational run" I started shipping this as an action movie take on Red, White & Royal Blue for the older set. Having watched it, I see I'll need to explain away Derringer's wife -easy enough, he's bi & the marriage is mostly to secure the conservative vote to have won him the presidency- & ignore a truly great storyline with Sam & Noel, but I think she's married to her job so it can be done. I feel like I have to write it. Because my muses are already screaming to work Peacemaker into it somehow & my muses already have me howling which is how I had hoped the movie would be, but it wasn't the worst so I can work with it. You're just asking for something like this when Amazon Prime presents them both. Like if Netflix had done one & Amazon the other, I wouldn't feel like they're meant to be in similar universes. But it's Amazon for Red, White & Royal Blue AND Heads of State so it's happening. I think it would make sense for America to elect a Reagan-esque President after 8 years of Ellen Claremont. Yeah. The muses are working with gas tonight & of course it's happening the closer I get to 3am. I cannot be the only person in the world waiting for Sam to show Will the difference between gym strong & strong strong in bed. Can I?
It's after 6am eastern time & I stayed up to watch The Old Guard 2 twice. Not because I planned on a instant repeat view, but because I needed to see it again to confirm my conclusion. So feel here comes a likely incoherent rant with all the spoilers.
I anticipated that this movie would destroy me, but it utterly disappointed me instead. Nicky & Joe's car antics in the beginning are very similar to the panels of Andy & Nile in The Old Guard - Force Multiplied #1, which was fun, but there's nothing else connecting to the comics. Their choice to diverge from the comics & take Andy's immortality in the first movie is still a choice that I love, but I still wanted to see some callbacks to the source material. Is Tuah supposed to be Isaac from The Old Guard - Tales Through Time #6? Will the final arc of the comics come out before the third movie & will they relate at all when both projects are finished???
Ignoring that, let's just focus on the movie itself. Too much doesn't work for me.
First, Joe's the one staying in touch with Booker when he was the one most adamant about banishing him in the first movie??? And the joke of him texting his new boyfriend raises more than an eyebrow when you realize it must have been a message from Booker. I'd shrug it off, except the chemistry between my immortal husbands was off in this one & I didn't like it!
Second, not 1 but 2 immortals have been hiding this whole time??? It's established in the comics & first movie that they dream of each other until they find one another, which is why Booker was haunted in his sleep for like 200 years with Quynh's repeated drowning that woke Nile up once in the first movie. Yet Tuah is around 2300 & was never sensed by Joe, Nicky, Booker or Nile & NONE of the group knew about Discord being the 1st out there watching them through time except Nile apparently dreamt of Discord at least once & saw her "kill" Tuah to steal the books he had on them?? Also, Andy & Quynh apparently never met Tuah who became a "new one" after them since he didn't reveal himself until Quynh was buried at sea & he helped Andy escape her captivity the next day? It makes no sense.
Third, the immortality loss/regifting rules. ....WHAT??? So Nile, the last one (like is this a prophesied thing that she'sthe end of the line or does it just mean she's the newest kid on this block??), stabbed Andy & was able to "take" the immortality? Mmmkay. Except, Andy healed from that stab in the chest when they first met. It was after a whole bunch of other fighting that she lost it. Booker & Quynh's injuries from Nile immediately did not heal in this one. So how's that work? Do they just suddenly lose the gift like they randomly got it of does the last/newest one take their power? What happened to Lykon? Could Tuah have been there & somehow wounded him? I could see the timeline working with the comics given Lykon joined Andy when Alexander the Great conquered Judea in 332 BCE & Tuah is 2300 so it could be that he was new then & the last one at that time. But even if he was responsible for Lykon somehow, it still doesn't explain Andy or Discord. Nile's stab is NOT the one that didn't heal on Andy. It's the one she got in the church fight - do not think for a second that I hadn't just rewatched the 1st one in anticipation of this premiere so I KNOW what I saw! And Nile never met Discord before the movie so I feel like they were trying to bs something for the movie & just did not think it through. Or give it any real thought. Like this new regifting idea. Wtf? Just. WHAT? Love how Booker's gone from we're both ready to die now, right, Andy in the first one to Tag, you're immortal again in this. Just going all in on a theory from a random guy he's known all of 5 minutes who could've been spouting nonsense as a plant among them because he'd spent more time with Discord than them so who knows what his loyalties are?? And I didn't see relief or peace or anything meaningful on Booker's face at the end. How dare they???
Fourth, Discord. I'll always love Uma Thurman, but wtf is this character? So she apparently lost her immortality at some unknown point in time close to the events of this movie, but still manages to navigate the world of gun running to amass what she needs to carry out this convoluted plan to kidnap Nile, Tuah, Nicky & Joe then force Nile to wound one of the others so that they'll "of their own free will" give Discord their immortality as it leaves them??? I can't take any of this seriously while she's calling herself Discord.
Final thing because I need sleep like 5 hours ago is the main reason this didn't work for me. It's so friggin rushed! The runtime is just 20 minutes less than the first movie, but that movie made every minute work. That one was done very much like a sequel wasn't guaranteed so it wanted a fully contained movie with plot & character development & such good action! This one dares to just end with so much waiting for the 3rd movie & so little done to develop the new characters OR maintain the dynamics from the 1st movie. Andy & Nile are great, but Copley is barely a thing in this, I already griped about Joe & Nicky being off & Quynh's return was so anticlimactic & lackluster. Then you just shoehorn Tuah & Discord in with all this nonsense like they've been there all along & it just doesn't work! It was hilarious in Fired Up! to think that Downey was actually there holding his junk in the background during the naked cheerleading scene, but you just can't seriously expect me to believe 2 immortals went undetected by the group AND Copley in all of his obsessive research never caught on to them either? There was just no team or real story building in this one & I hold out hope that the third will wrap it all up nicely, but this was nowhere near my admittedly high expectations. I didn't hate it. It's just presented as this stopgap between the 1st & 3rd movie. I expected more meat to it after the 1st movie had me restarting on here & writing fanfiction again & going all in to buy & read all the comics. It's been 5 years & I've been here so eagerly & patiently waiting & I was so hyped up & my balloon has burst so I'm going to sleep off this deflated feeling & hopefully feel better after a few hours sleep.
the old guard 2
I'm not ready. I don't know how to go from Squid Game wrecked me to The Old Guard 2 likely to destroy me. Why do I keep paying Netflix money to do this to me?
Not sure how I feel about S3 of Squid Game. I didn't hate it. It's perfectly depressingly dystopian no matter how I hoped for a happier ending. All those lives for what? But that's the end result for all of us subject to the whims of the elite. We fed & powered their machine, entertained & protected them for nothing but our children to continue doing the same. The ending just leaves the question - was the South Korean base destroyed & moved elsewhere or have there always been games everywhere without anyone knowing? I think it's the latter. So I don't think that this is the end of Squid Game. Definitely this chapter, possibly this base, but the games continue elsewhere & Netflix keeps open the possibility of expanding the franchise. A suitably capitalistic end.
The last arc doesn't stand up to the first 2, for me, but it thankfully does not ruin the series, imo. It just played out so unpredictably that I don't know how I feel about it. Beyond fuck #333 sideways with that metal pole for all that he did. I thought I'd hate #100 the most from this group, but #333 came in hot to win it as the worst. I think I'm going to go into a dark room alone with some loud angry music to process what I just watched.
Humans are...what, Gi-hun? Humans are...what?
Forget a dark room, I need a rage room with things to break.
Squid Game. How DARE you!!!! The most shocking & emotional death, for me, since the heartbreaking episode 1x06.
I am on a roll with bad shows this weekend. I just started Woman of the Dead on Netflix & I don't think I can even finish the first episode. Mark's death was suitably shocking, so I was willing to overlook him on the mortician's table with nothing more than a bloody nose despite the massive trauma a Land Rover vs Ducati would do to the human body. Willing to go along with it when they say the motorcycle can be rebuilt despite, wtf, who would want that & insurance says rebuild not total it??? But gtfo with his LUNCH from the day he died still being like new in his tank bag, along with his burner phone AFTER the fatal accident, his funeral & the time it took to get through whatever red tape to rebuild then actually restore the bike to working order for Blum???? His police issued gun is missing & any/everything on that bike wasn't taken as evidence when it was involved in the crime of his hit & run??? No one even checked that bag to see there's a sandwich in here, better toss it before it gets gross??? And then, miraculously, it is not gross when Blum finds it, at minimum if the English subtitles can be believed, 7 days after the wreck? Burner phone is in pristine condition with battery after it's been on & blowing up in there at least a week? I know Europe has many things better than the US, but shame on you for not making this unbreakable, immortal device available to the whole world. Also, is it really cold enough to preserve the sandwich throughout the restoration process??
Can anyone tell me if this show gets less dumb or is it so stupid it gets fun & that's why it's popular enough that another season is coming in over 2 weeks? For now, I'm taking a break from anything new & going to watch something tried & true.
Just binged S2 of Squid Game & it did not miss a beat from S1. There only being 7 episodes, the cliffhanger & having to wait for S3 sucks, but there are so many reasons why this show is one of Netflix's best. My only complaint other than the cliffhanger is how underutilized Lee Jin-wook was. I'm hoping for more of him in S3, but that mf cliffhanger, man. If that's all he gets, it's a near criminal waste of his talent.
The increased use of Lee Byung-hun almost balances my disappointment at how little Lee Jin-wook played into most episodes. Byung-hun is such an incredible actor & he was fantastic this season. Been a huge fan since I Saw The Devil & he is so incredibly expressive. Just the way he, as Player 001, looked at Player 456 in episode 2x07 was flawless. When Gi-hun lays out his plan & Young-il says "So, what you're saying is, sacrifice a few for the good of the rest," his eyes say it all. Like mf that's what we do! The whole justification of those behind the games is let some of this "trash" take itself out & Gi-hun is doing the same thing - letting some die in favor of others, but he feels from a more justified position. Then when the bodies start dropping around them & they do nothing per Gi-hun's plan the look Young-il shoots at him screams This is why I picked their side. People die regardless. One person decides to sacrifice another. Dog eat dog. Everyone always clawing for their scraps. He's no better or worse than anyone there. Nothing's going to change human nature. Why shouldn't he run the games? I love that this character is played by such an incredible actor because it keeps the character so dynamic. In S1 where he was revealed as In-ho & shot his own brother? I loved that twist! I'm about 75% sure he'll ultimately be brought down, but whatever they do with his character will be epic just because of the talent behind The Front Man/In-ho/Young-il & any other names they give him in the series. Have I said that I love Lee Byung-hun yet? Because I love him.
So, Netflix, any chance "Squid Game Season 3 will debut in 2025" means next week? And can we get an episode count in the double digits? I feel like we still have a lot to resolve. I am really really really really REALLY hoping that the creators bring it all home in the end. I loved this season & the first, so please don't ruin it for me because this has the potential to be one of my all-time favorite shows.
I have an ex that I tried to cut from my life in 2016. Could no longer handle their issues when they stopped taking their meds, tried to reason with them & get them to get help, but they never did so I cut ties for my mental & financial health since I was suckered for years into doing/buying things for them that cost me without any repayment. Over 7 years, I have blocked them & legit ghosted like a pro even tho we live in a smallish community where people know and/or related to us. I have been ice cold on the topic of her & all who know me know that is a bridge I will not go back over or discuss.
She, tho, kept trying to get around my blocks, leaves notes & gifts periodically on my porch or at my front door, tries to get my family to get me to talk to her & has used her famil connections to try & get in touch with me, even using local police to call in "welfare checks" on me a few times before I made clear that I would not tolerate such interference again unless it was MY family or employer calling in a check because they could not contact me. She's never been a threat, in my opinion, just a nuisance.
Today, tho.
Today.
My parents, who are known in our community to have moved in with me as my single story home is better for them after having suffered back injuries, today my parents found a little battery box wedged in the screen door with a note on it not to throw, note inside. The note was to tell me that, 7 years after I have had anything to do with her, she had dumped her cat Fluffy at a property connected to my family in the town I used to live in. Fluffy is a gorgeous calico that I loved of hers that she found as a kitten 12 years ago & has, to my knowledge, kept as a housecat since then. She did not say she left them Fluffy at my grandad's old house, where I lived all but the last year of my relationship with her when I took my lifetime savings & bought a home of my own. She didn't say it was my parents or either of my brothers or my aunt's place, just that she had made a choice, asked God to forgive her as a pet mom & I might be seeing Fluffy around "my place" in Cacapon (hometown, over a mountain & literally 8 minutes by car from where I live now.) I work weekends. Everyone, including her, knows that as I have had the same job & schedule for 15 years now. So she brings chaos to my door while I am trying to do the teleworking I need to & I'm just thankful I work from, but I still have 3 hours left in my shift. And I am freaking out that a poor, innocent housecat has suddenly been unleashed in the wild in a place it has never been. So my parents start making calls & have left to go look for the cat. My aunt, who lives next door to & is caretaker for my now deceased grandad's home is checking there, but says this is just a ploy to get back into my life. She(ex) knows that I will never abandon an animal in need. (Sorry, but people have to fend for themselves at some point & that is why she us & must stay my ex.) She knows, especially, that I would not want any harm to come to Fluffy so I 100% would have taken the cat, if asked. Why ask me, tho? She has friends, co-workers & family that I absolutely know would have also taken Fluffy if something came up that required rehoming the cat. Instead of doing that or just leaving Fluffy on MY property here, she says she has left the cat loose in the next town over on some property connected to me where I may now begin seeing Fluffy??? Also gives me $16 & says she'll give my mom cat food at some point in the future for the caring for Fluffy. The number of times I have just ranted & yelled WTF in the last hour has my cats legit stressed & trying to comfort me because they're not used to me being upset, angry or stressed like this. I have removed & blocked all of my ex's contact info along with her parents & cousin who I had the most contact with while we were together so I cannot call anyone up & ask WTF is happening right now. I know where everyone lives, but again, 3 hours before I can even think of going anywhere & time, imo, is of the essence to get Fluffy back indoors even if she doesn't know my house or cats.
I am absolutely taking Fluffy in & keeping the "God forgive me" note as proof that my ex gave the cat up in case she tries to get Fluffy back later or use the cat as a way into my life or home, but what if my aunt is right & Fluffy isn't even in danger???? I'm stressing because I ran into my ex's cousin yesterday at the courthouse where we both happened to be early voting in the primaries. We exchanged rushed, generic, "Nice to see you, how you been, we should hang out sometime" conversation before the very patient county clerk asked me to follow her to get my vote cast as the ex's cousin was all done & leaving. I honestly thought nothing of it except that maybe I should spend time with the cousin again because she was a good friend & she & my ex weren't always on good terms. But family is family around here & I have to believe now that the cousin told my ex that I have been spotted in the wild & the very next day my ex does this????
Do I do everything I can to make sure Fluffy is ok, including going to see my ex or is this just her finally finding a way to get me out that she knew I could not ignore? Because I cannot take the risk that a housecat that old is just suddenly dumped out into a place she is not likely to survive without help. Depending on where she was left, she could be near the main road & struck by traffic, in town with an a*hole neighbor on the street that poisons & shoots stray cats or out in the boonies where a cat could be eaten by wild animals. WTF was my ex thinking & why has she done this. It's been OVER SEVEN YEARS. My last words to her were literally "Consider me dead." Not because I was going to harm myself, but I knew I was done & out of her life & she needed to accept that with a finality as if I were no longer here. For all I know, in all that time, Fluffy might have passed. I know I just lost my dog, Brando, in October after 10 days shy of 17 years. This could be a trap. She has to know this will not have a positive effect, but it might make sense to her if she's off her meds. Should I call in my own welfare check to have an officer go to see if she's ok & ask about Fluffy or don't do that when I know what it's like to be on the receiving end of those checks? Do I send my parents to talk to her or should I go visit her parents to try & see what is going on?
This is what she has always done to me. Tangle me in knots, throw chaos into my life & get me to do what I can to appease her & solve whatever problem she is bringing to me.
I think my mistake was telling her cousin yesterday that I'm happy. I did not go into any other detail. When she asked me how I was, my answer was I'm happy & did my ex hear that & decide it's unacceptable for me to be happy without her in my life?
Amazon! That CANNOT be how you end Good Omens 2! Is there truly no limit to your evil?????
Soooo....anyone else going over the Netflix user agreement with a magnifying glass after seeing Joan Is Awful?
So. I decided to binge Queen Charlotte, a Bridgerton story today. I wish I had done some research first because I was not ready & I am destroyed. It is the absolute best thing so far out of Netflix's Bridgerton releases, but OMFG the feels I feel. Can't review it coherently without spoilers & sobbing.
Ever borrow a title on Kindle Unlimited that was so bad you want to return it along with every other title you've currently borrowed while you re-evaluate your life choices?
Did The Sandman break Netflix? Because I want to watch it NOW & it will not play!
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