It’s a synthetic gas. The counteragent to chemical subjugation. The gas immunizes the brain’s neuropathways from external manipulation. It’s an antidote to mind control. // Most of the intelligence community doesn't believe he exists. The ones that do call him the Winter Soldier. He's credited with over two dozen assassinations in the last 50 years.
Summary: For the first few months you worked with the avengers, they barely knew you. Beyond what you were like during a mission, you were a mystery to them. It was truly marvelous how well you worked with the team and yet there was so little they knew about you.
You barely went to team bonding and you NEVER went to Tony Stark's parties. Well, not until last night. And you’re never going again.
A/N: this is the longest thing I’ve written, WHOOPS. I couldn’t stop with this one so hope some of y’all enjoy it! Ps: no I don’t know what card game Steve and Bucky are playing, make believe (shrugs) beta read by my friend @whats-yesterday00
It’s official. You’re never leaving your room again.
Not after what happened last night.
From this moment forward you are not leaving your room. No matter the reason. No matter how much they beg.
Actually that’s a lie, you would have to leave your room at some point.
But you’re going to camp out in your room for as long as possible.
There’s a chance that if you do leave your room, and risk running into him, you’ll melt into a pile of goo on the floor. Or maybe you’d implode from the mortification.
Either way, you shouldn’t risk it.
You should just revert to the old version of you. The girl that didn’t ever leave her room. Was too intimidated by the other avengers to spend time with them. The girl who — even though you had been given a warm welcome — didn’t feel like part of the team yet.
For the first few months you worked with the avengers, they barely knew you. Beyond what you were like during a mission, you were a mystery to them. It was truly marvelous how well you worked with the team and yet there was so little they knew about you.
Steve would occasionally organize team bonding events. After you joined, Steve planned them more frequently. A subtle way to get you to open up to them.
Sometimes you would attend. Key word, sometimes.
Usually, it would take some convincing from a few of them. Like when Sam would crack some jokes about how this week you HAD to be there because they were doing XYZ and so on. At some point you’d feel guilty for missing it and show up only to sit there quietly the whole time. You’d speak when spoken to, but never intentionally join a conversation.
A majority of the time, you wouldn’t feel up for socializing and gave some excuse as to why you’re not feeling well. Steve never pushed you to show, but his eyes grew soft with concern whenever you told him you couldn’t attend.
But, at some point, the Avengers noticed a change in you. You stopped turning down bonding events and started actually participating. They would find you hanging out in the lounge more often or sticking around to watch movies.
After a long and brutal game of Uno during game night, they were all left surprised by how excited and competitive you were. The game ended with a stare down between you and Clint.
You were still a relatively shy person, just more willing to open up and be yourself around them. None of them knew what caused this sudden change, but few of them had their theories.
The first time you were tempted to leave your room was about two months after you started living in the compound.
You were standing on the only chair available in your room which happened to be the swivel desk chair. Was it the safest way to hang up your room decor? Probably not. But you wanted to decorate your walls and this was the only way to do it.
Your arms were starting to grow tired. One hand was holding up the poster, desperately trying to keep it straight, while the other was trying to rip off a piece of tape.
Somehow the chair moved just the right way and you lost your balance. You stumbled to the floor and took the chair with you.
“Shit!” You loudly groaned after landing on your side with a thump.
As you carefully stood back up, you heard a voice from the other side of your door.
“You okay in there?”
Your stomach dropped at the realization someone heard you fall. The urge to ignore the voice was strong, but you also knew they were just trying to check on you.
With a slight limp, you approached the door and opened it. Behind it was a concerned Bucky Barnes. Up until now, you’d never gotten this close of a look at him before. You never noticed how blue his eyes actually were. It was almost hypnotizing the way you were so easily lost in them as he stared back at you.
“Are you alright? I heard a crash.”
You blinked back to reality. “Yeah I’m fine. I fell trying to put up a poster,” you gestured towards it- now discarded (and thankfully not ripped) on the ground.
He peeked inside to see the fallen chair and poster. “Want some help?”
His kind gesture shouldn’t have surprised you. There was no indication Bucky Barnes was a bad guy. He was a great partner to work with in the field and his friends spoke very highly of him. But it did surprise you because outside of that, you never really had the chance to actually interact with him.
You also heard a notorious amount of grumpy old man jokes from Sam that you didn’t exactly know how to interpret.
“Yeah sure,” you nodded.
He followed behind and entered your room. He examined the decorations you managed to put up in the time you’ve been living there.
There were various music and movie posters of pop culture he mostly didn’t recognize. There were fake plants littered all around the room, scattered on different surfaces. The shelves were also covered with books. Rows and rows of books, that would’ve taken him years to get through. Close to the ceiling were strings of lights that gave the room a soft warm glow.
While he stood in the quiet of your room he noticed the faint music playing in the background. His face grew with curiosity as he looked around for where the sound was coming from.
“What song is that?”
You walked to your desk and grabbed the chair off the floor. “I’m not sure. It’s a playlist of old music I found online. Sometimes I like to put on old music from the 30s and 40s to have as background noise.”
You pointed to a YouTube video playing on your computer.
“You like old music?” He inquired, looking slightly surprised.
“Yeah, but I don’t know much about it,” you shrugged. “I don’t know what was popular back then or have any favorites.”
He glanced at the video playing on your computer, “I could give you some recommendations if you want.”
“Really?” you asked with growing enthusiasm.
The corners of his mouth threatened to perk up. “Yeah why not? If you wanna get into that type of music. Who better to learn it from?”
“That sounds great,” you said with a shy smile.
The realization dawned on you that now you were both just standing in the quiet of your room. You grabbed the poster and cleared your throat to grab his attention.
“Oh right,” he mumbled, looking a bit flustered and ran a hand through his short hair. “Where did you want to hang it?”
“Up here,” You pointed to the empty space on the wall next to your desk.
He took the poster from you and carefully stepped on the chair as you held it still. He placed it against the wall, following your directions for where to hang it. You handed him a few pieces of tape and he slowly flattened out the poster before sticking it to the wall. When he was finished, he stepped off the chair and took a step back with you to get a proper look at it. The picture hung high above your desk. A starry sky with a collection of different constellations.
“It looks nice. I like what you’ve done with your room,” he complimented.
“Thanks. And thank you for helping.”
“It was no problem. Wouldn’t want you breaking a bone from falling off a chair,” he lightly teased.
You started to blush at the embarrassing reminder. “Please don’t tell anyone about that.”
Bucky pressed his pointer finger and thumb to his lips and ran them across his mouth, showing you his lips are sealed.
After he left, you admired the poster on the wall, listening to the music still playing in the background. The image of him still fresh in your mind.
Bucky was nicer than you expected. Not that you expected him to be an asshole. But he was one of the few Avengers you hesitated to talk to because they were a bit intimidating outside of work. Bucky had a consistent glare or grumpy look on his face that kept you at arm's length.
The day after the poster situation when you made yourself coffee in the morning, someone stopped near you and waited for their turn to use the coffee machine.
“Hey, I made that song list I was telling you about.”
You looked to see Bucky standing next to you and digging something out of his back pocket. He handed you a folded piece of notebook paper.
“Most of them are from the 30s and early 40s, songs I used to listen to. But I also included some late 40s and 50s songs I was introduced to after the war and … everything.”
When you took the paper from him your stomach swirled with something you haven’t felt in a long time.
“Thanks,” you replied sweetly, “I’ll give them a listen later.”
He offered you a small smile before filling his mug with coffee.
That was probably the first time you started to see through his tough exterior and he let his real self shine through the cracks.
_____
After that day you started to pay more attention to Bucky. In the field, in the compound. Just in general.
While you still didn’t spend much time with the team, in the brief moments that you did, your attention would drift towards him. You were more aware of his presence when he was near.
And you did in fact give the songs he recommended a listen. You listened to them quite often actually.
You were still listening to those songs weeks later.
You were in the kitchen listening to your new “oldies” playlist. It was late in the night and you needed to focus on something that wasn’t the chaos swarming in your brain. So, you decided to break out the baking supplies and royal icing you bought weeks ago.
As you flattened out the dough with a rolling pin a figure appeared from the dimly lit hallway.
“What are you doing?” Bucky asked once he noticed your presence. His voice was laced with sleep.
“Making cookies,” you answered, grabbing the cookie cutters.
He walked closer to the kitchen island and leaned his forearms on the counter. “Why are you making cookies at one in the morning?”
“Stress baking.”
There was a pause as he watched you cut flower shapes out of the dough.
“Can’t sleep?”
You shrugged without looking up, “something like that.” You didn’t feel like elaborating.
This guy you barely know definitely does not want to be hearing about how you can’t sleep from anxiety. He didn’t need to hear that after the last mission you went on with the team your brain was constantly screaming at you all the things you did wrong and could’ve done better.
“Do you do this a lot?” he gestured towards your work. "Bake in the middle of the night?”
“I have once or twice. It also helps that no one is coming and going so I get some peace and quiet.”
Bucky visibly tensed at your explanation, “sorry I ruined it.”
Your head perked up immediately to prove him wrong. “It’s alright, you didn’t.”
He looked relieved to hear that.
“What are you making?”
“Sugar cookies, but I’m gonna put icing on when they’re done.” You placed the cut out dough on the baking sheet.
Your stomach coiled with nerves before speaking again. “I could save you some. If you want,” you said in a quieter voice.
His eyes softened and he smiled at you. “That’d be great.”
As you continued placing cookie dough on the sheet, he walked over the fridge to fetch what he came down to the kitchen for.
Now that the room was quiet, he could fully process the music that was playing in the background. For a moment, he stared at the inside of the fridge as he listened to the beginning notes of the next song.
He finally grabbed the bottle of water and closed the fridge door before eyeing you with a quirked brow.
“Billie Holiday?”
You looked up from the cookies in confusion. You momentarily registered the song playing in the background was “What a Little Moonlight Can Do” by Billie Holiday. One of the songs from the list he gave you.
“Oh yeah I finally made my own playlist. Most of the songs are the ones you gave me,” you grabbed the baking sheet and carefully placed it in the oven.
“You liked the songs?” His voice sounded like it had a hint of surprise.
You nodded as the corners of your mouth perked into a grin. “I do yeah. They’re really good. It’s different from the normal stuff I listen to but it’s really growing on me.”
Joy inched its way onto his face as he listened to you. “That’s great. I’m glad.”
You leaned back against the counter and took off the apron you were wearing. “You have good taste in music.”
The ends of his ears turned red, “Thanks.”
Silence returned to the kitchen. you both stood there not knowing what to say next. The air between you was thick, like you wanted to say more but couldn’t find the words.
The song continued playing in the background, almost taunting you.
You’re in love
You’re hearts a flutter
And all day long,
You only stutter
How dare Billie Holiday tease you right now with him in the same room. Who gave her the permission to take a peek into your heart and put it on display in front of him.
The music was disrupted by Bucky clearing his throat, “well, I should go back to my room.”
You shoved your hands in your pockets, “hope you get some sleep.”
He nodded before making his way out of the kitchen and walking down the hall.
A few seconds after you were sure he left, you took a long deep breath. You stood there grappling with the fact that you definitely were starting to feel something for him.
Something strong.
Something you couldn’t get rid of.
The next morning you stood on the other side of Bucky’s door with a small plastic container in your hands.
This was starting to feel silly. You’ve stared down countless criminals and kicked the crap out of them. But this was making you nervous.
With a shaky hand you finally knocked, and hoped that he was actually in his room.
It took only a brief moment for Bucky to answer. He must have just showered. His hair was a bit messy, slightly damp and he smelled nice. He was wearing one of those black compression shirts that hugged his muscles all the right ways.
It should be illegal for him to look that good.
“Hey, what’s up?” He asked, surprised to see you.
His question paused your ogling and brought your attention back to why you were there in the first place.
“I saved some cookies for you,” you offered him the tupperware.
Bucky’s eyes softened as he glanced between you and the dessert. He took the container from you and opened the lid, looking down with a smile at the flower cookies with purple, yellow and pink frosting.
“Thanks, they look amazing,” he complimented. “Hope you didn’t stay up all night making them.”
You shrugged, “It’s fine, I ended up getting some sleep. It helped me clear my mind.”
Only because something else obsessively invaded your thoughts. Someone that cleared away the anxiety from your job.
_____
As the weeks rolled by, you started to leave the sanctity of your bedroom and brave the common areas.
Was it because of Bucky? Maybe.
You found yourself intrigued by the man. And it didn’t hurt that he was easy on the eyes.
That’s why you slowly but surely started to hang out with them more. You needed an excuse to be around him.
It was almost embarrassing how much your crush on Bucky was affecting you. You were so worried about talking to the other teammates, yet desperately wanted to talk to him. Even if it was for a fleeting moment.
The team took notice of your increased presence around the compound. Some were quiet about it, others weren’t, and loved to tease you.
In a weird way, the teasing made you feel more welcomed. Like you were really part of the team.
“Well well well,” Sam started with a smirk as he walked into the gym. “Look who’s training while the sun’s still out.”
You froze in the middle of wrapping your hands to look up at him, Bucky, and Steve about to start their workout.
”I’m not nocturnal Sam,” you joked back.
Usually, you would visit the gym at night before you went to sleep while no one else was there. As of lately, you had a slight change in routine.
“Could’ve fooled me. I heard that you bake in the middle of the night.”
Your eyebrows raised at his comment, “How’d you know that?”
“Little birdie told me.” his grin couldn’t get any wider.
You looked to the only possible suspect. Bucky’s eyes quickly averted from you as his ears turned pink.
Steve shook his head with a smile at his two friends. He tapped Sam’s shoulder before making his way to the bench, “c’mon quit bothering her.”
Sam playfully rolled his eyes at Steve before pointing in your direction, “I better see you at game night later.”
You shrugged, “Maybe I could stop by.”
“You better stop by. We’re breaking out Uno,” he beamed before following behind Steve.
You smiled to yourself as he left and finished wrapping your hands. Before you could hit the punching bag, you realized Bucky didn’t leave to join Sam and Steve.
“You want some help?” he offered while pointing towards the bag.
You nodded as nerves turned your stomach. “Yeah sure.”
He walked closer to the punching bag, held it, and prepared for you to strike.
You exhaled and prepped your stance while staring at the bag in front of you. Your punches started off weak and hesitant — mostly because of his presence — before you slowly relaxed and drew more of your strength.
Besides Sam and Steve, another Avenger that always tried to rope you into social functions was Tony. Occasionally he would throw some party for a holiday or even for no special reason, simply because he wanted to.
The only party of his that you attended was the first one he threw after you joined. Only because he didn’t give you much of a choice. After that, you never attended another Stark party.
Well, until last night.
“I’m going all out for this one. Thor’s coming back to earth and man does that guy like to party,” Tony boasted about his plans for the weekend in the lounge. Or what would soon become last night's party.
You silently sat in the corner of the couch “reading” a book. Well, you were reading but now you were nosy and listening to the people around you. As part of your attempt to be more social with the team, you bravely chose the lounge instead of your room.
You heard earlier that Thor was returning after being away from earth for a few weeks doing some Asgardian space duties you didn’t know the details of.
“Don’t set anything on fire this time,” Wanda teased before taking a sip from her mug.
Tony spun on his heel to point at her. “That was not me!”
A few chuckles could be heard throughout the room, even a quiet one from you. You’d heard the same story from three different people about how Tony swears it wasn’t his fault that his drink spilled and caused a small electrical fire.
“Regardless, it’s going to be amazing and I better see you all there on Friday,” he then pointed at Bucky playing cards with Steve. “And that means you Barnes. Don’t think I forgot you missed out last time.”
”Looks like I lucked out considering you almost burned the place down,” Bucky quipped back without looking up from his cards.
Tony pinched the bridge of his nose. “It wasn’t me,” he mumbled under his breath.
Steve nudged his best friend before placing another card down on the coffee table. “Come on Buck, it’ll be fun.”
Bucky gave a long stare to Steve. You noticed he tended to do that a lot. Turn a normal glare into a staring contest with Sam or Steve. A few seconds passed before he placed his next card down with a sigh. “Fine.”
Having sensed that your eyes were on him, Bucky glanced up at you from across the room. Your gaze darted away and back to your book in an instant.
Tony noticed this and walked closer to the couch, studying you trying to read. He could clearly tell you were listening in and watching. “What about you, wallflower?”
Your head perked up in confusion.
You knew he was addressing you because of the nickname. At first Steve was worried about Tony calling you that, but you actually secretly liked it. It was like the teasing, made you feel more included.
“You wanna step out of your comfort zone? Ready to mingle?”
You let the question hang in the air for a moment, contemplating your response. After hearing Bucky’s answer, the idea of attending Tony’s party was sounding more and more appealing.
“I might.”
You tried to ignore how a few sets of eyes landed on you. Including his.
“Seriously?” Tony asked, not expecting you to actually accept his invitation.
”Yes seriously, I’m considering it,” you answered with more confidence.
Tony excitedly snapped and pointed at you. “That’s a yes! You can’t take that back.”
You awkwardly smiled in return.
“Finally! I knew this day would come,” Tony cheered as he left the lounge.
You attempted to actually read your book now but felt Bucky’s gaze lingering on you. When you met his eyes, they returned to the pile of cards on the coffee table. You then finally went back to your reading.
_____
You don’t know what feels worse. The pounding headache from last night's drinks, or the anxiety pulling you apart from the inside out.
While you laid in bed, the lights were kept dim to not aggravate your headache further. You were admiring the poster Bucky helped you hang up. For so long you’d look at it and your thoughts would drift to the man who helped you hang it. Your mood would lift or your heart would flutter making you feel giddy.
Now, you wanted to rip it off your wall.
It stared back at you as a reminder of what you did last night. You couldn’t stop thinking about how it only took a little liquid courage and one single brave moment to embarrass yourself. You most likely ruined your chances of becoming real friends with him, or even something more.
There’s no way Bucky actually wants to be with you. There’s no way Bucky felt the same way, held the same admiration for you that you did for him. He’d probably be nice about it and let you down easily.
Well, he tried to let you down easily, but your fear interrupted him before he could inevitably ask you to forget about what happened. You couldn’t listen to it. You didn’t want to hear the heartbreaking reality that he didn’t want you beyond a spur of the moment fling.
You’d rather just let the whole thing blow over. Let Bucky take your silence as a signal to let this pass. Let everyone forget about it and go about their business like normal. Because words always travel fast here. And by now everyone probably fucking knew about you and Bucky.
As the hours rolled by and the sun was setting, you couldn’t ignore the fact that you ran out of the water and food stashed in your room.
You have to leave. As much as you don’t want to, you have to.
It kind of felt weird, spending all day in your room. You’d just started getting used to being around everyone, that now it felt kind of normal. You almost looked forward to the social interactions. Even if you didn’t speak a lot or join in some conversations. Just being around them felt … nice.
You rolled over in bed and reached for your phone left on the nightstand. After turning off do not disturb, the screen was flooded with notifications. Part of you was surprised that they were checking in on you considering it used to be normal for you to live like a hermit.
Natasha: Morning sleepyhead, you hungover? Feeling alright?
Clint: I got doughnuts, you better get down here before Thor wakes up and eats them all
Steve: Hey, you doing okay?
Let me know if you need anything
And 1 missed call followed by 2 texts from Bucky:
I know you’re hiding in your room
Can we talk?
You really didn’t want to talk. Because you knew he wanted to talk about last night. You weren’t ready to have that conversation yet. You weren’t ready when Bucky tried knocking on your door hours ago and you still weren’t ready now.
Maybe later tonight. Depending on your bravery.
You didn’t answer any of their messages. Just got out of bed and shoved your phone in your pocket.
You hoped there wasn’t a large crowd or any crowd period in the kitchen. But unfortunately, you weren’t so lucky. As you approached the kitchen you heard voices that only got louder as you got closer.
You stayed behind the doorway while you listened. Not exactly intentional eavesdropping. More like you froze at the realization they were talking about you.
“What the hell did I do now?” Tony complained, he sounded offended.
“You told everyone about me and Y/N,” Bucky scolded Tony, his tone sounding bitter and angry.
“Correction, I told two people last night,” Tony countered. “It’s not my fault that the gossip was so juicy it spread like wildfire.”
“You’re unbelievable,” Bucky grumbled.
“What’s unbelievable is you and your girl not making out sooner.”
You heard Bucky sigh and after a pause he quietly mumble, but it was loud enough for you to hear. “She’s not my girl.”
Those words echoed in your ears as if you heard it up close. She’s not my girl.
A suffocating ache wound itself around your chest. Your fists clenched so tight, your fingernails made an imprint on your palm.
His girl. You could only dream of being his girl.
You almost went back to your room. Almost. But you were already here, and the kitchen wouldn’t be empty for hours.
During the pause in their conversation, you passed the threshold. The room fell silent. The sound of a pin drop could bounce off the walls. You felt the tension in your bones with every single step you took.
You didn’t look any of them in the eyes. You couldn’t. Just kept your focus trained on the floor as you moved the counter.
From the cabinet, you found a large refillable water bottle to stock up and keep in your room. You waited at the fridge for it to fill.
All their eyes on you made your whole body tense. You couldn’t see it, but you could feel it. Their looks weighed like a heavy blanket and they practically saw right through you.
Steve was the first to break the silence. “How’ve you been? Are you feeling alright?”
You cleared your throat before speaking. You don’t know the last time you said something, your voice was probably hoarse. “I’m fine. Was a bit hungover this morning, didn’t feel well.”
The second the water bottle was filled, you tightened the lid and turned back to the counter where you found the box of doughnuts that Clint texted you about. With a nervous hand, you grabbed the last chocolate frosted doughnut.
You belined for the hallway, eager to leave when Bucky called your name. His voice reached through your chest cavity and squeezed your heart. You didn’t stop walking. You couldn’t speak to him. Not yet.
____________________________
“And that means you Barnes. Don’t think I forgot you missed out last time.”
Instead of actually acknowledging that he was absent during Stark’s last party, Bucky opted for poking fun at the man. He didn’t even have to look up from their card game to know that Stark was rolling his eyes or pinching his brow in frustration.
Bucky felt Steve’s elbow nudge his side before he placed another card on the coffee table. “Come on Buck, it’ll be fun,” Steve tried to encourage.
Bucky stared back at his best friend, trying to silently tell Steve that he would rather Stark actually burn down the building.
Bucky hates parties.
Actually that's a lie.
Bucky Barnes used to love parties. Before HYDRA, he used to be the life of the party. He’d be cracking jokes with his pals or going out dancing with dames. The music was loud and the excitement ran through the room and into your bloodstream, carrying you across the dance floor.
After everything that happened, he didn’t have much party left in him. It left him more reserved, more introverted. His blood ran cold now.
He always went to those team bonding things Steve organized because, well it was Steve, but they were also smaller, more intimate. He even found himself having fun. Some of the movies the team chose were weird, but some he really liked. During game nights he was more engaged then he expected he would be.
But the large parties he wished he could avoid. Now, the loud music irritated his ears. The modern music that played wasn’t to his taste and hard to dance to. The very few festivities he did attend, Steve managed to convince Tony to play one or two old songs from the 40s or at least the 50s, but that was it.
Steve stared back at him with an expression he was all too familiar with. It was the same look that Bucky would give scrawny little Stevie back in the day when he tried to convince him to join.
Bucky sighed and placed a card on the table. “Fine,” he grumbled.
In his peripheral vision, he sensed someone looking in his direction. When he turned away from their card game, he was met with your eyes. But only for a second, before they retreated back into your book.
Steve's mouth curled into a smile as he put down another card. “Who knows you might like it. And maybe your girl will go,” he whispered.
“She’s not my girl,” Bucky muttered back. The words tasted bitter in his mouth. He didn’t want a reminder that he didn’t have the luxury of calling you his girl.
From the moment you met, he knew he needed you in his life. Not just because you were pretty. And God damn it you were so pretty. But because you were enchanting.
It was like you had some magnetic pull on him he couldn’t avoid.
He’d worked with you on multiple missions because of course Steve immediately caught whiff of Bucky’s interest in you and paired you guys up. He saw first hand the power you wielded during a fight. The mysterious way you hid in the shadows and snuck up on people rivaled only him and Natasha. He almost got knocked out once because he stood there watching you attack a guard that towered over you like it was nothing.
Steve wouldn’t shut up about that for a whole week.
But when you weren’t beating up criminals or sitting in silence during mission briefings, he barely saw you. You almost never showed face at team functions and (more importantly) you never spoke to him.
He was worried you didn’t like him, or even worse you hated him. Steve and Sam tried to convince him that wasn’t true but it still never left his mind. It was still in his mind when he passed by your room and heard that crash. Bucky remained cautious, scared that you would ignore him or act coldly, but he still felt compelled to make sure you were okay.
And when he did finally get the small chances to talk to you, to see the parts of you that you often hid, he felt a thousand times lighter. Bucky saw the light in you grow brighter as you became more comfortable with the team.
In the moments you let your walls down, you shined like a diamond.
But he never saw you shine like that at Stark’s parties.
Bucky shook his head as he placed a new card, “besides, she never shows, you know that.”
Bucky noticed Stark approaching you to test the waters with an invitation for you to attend. He shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but then again, it isn’t exactly a private conversation. And he had enhanced hearing anyway.
“You wanna step out of your comfort zone? Ready to mingle?”
“I might.”
His head immediately snapped in your direction. He couldn’t hear what Stark asked you, he was too focused on your response.
“Yes seriously, I'm considering it.”
As of lately, you had a habit of saying you might go instead of actually saying yes. He noticed this because every single time you said ‘maybe,’ you showed up. It seemed like a way to give yourself an escape. A safety net to land in the roaring sea of anxiety.
But if you were considering it, that definitely meant you were going.
He tried to not linger on the fact that his heart rate increased the more he thought about it.
Stark seemed quite excited at your answer. “That's a yes! You can’t take that back”
You gave a bright smile in response. Bucky loved your smile. He’d go to hell and back to see you smile.
He didn’t realize he was still staring until you looked up from your book. He quickly returned his attention back to the cards in his hand.
Bucky cleared his throat, “is it my turn?”
“Nope,” Steve tried to hide the humor in his voice as he placed a winning card.
Bucky sighed while tossing his remaining cards on the table. He wasn’t too bummed about losing the game though. He was still thinking about seeing you Friday night.
_____
Steve Rogers is a traitor.
Well, at this very second he is a traitor. Because he is on the dance floor, dancing with you.
Slow dancing with you.
Bucky was watching from afar. Wait, that sounds creepy when he thinks about it like that. He was observing the party, and naturally his gaze landed on you. How could it not? In every room he entered, he looked for you.
The party had started by the time you showed up. He was in the middle of conversation with Sam when he saw you walk in by yourself, fashionably late.
He could’ve sworn his heart skipped a beat at the sight of you. The burgundy dress you wore made his head dizzy.
Bucky had a plan. He originally was going to catch you on the dance floor with a song that was easier to dance to, aka an older song. But you were already dancing with Steve and Wanda when one of those newer Sinatra songs came on. Well, new to him. A while back Natasha gave him a crash course in 20th century music after the war.
Should he be bitter and maybe just a tad jealous? No, he shouldn’t. He had all night to ask you to dance and yet he stood off to the side. Then Steve swooped in and ruined his plans.
And now the little punk was dancing with you.
Of course you wanted to dance with Steve. You were closer with him then you were with Bucky. Steve was the first person you started opening up to. And why shouldn’t you? Steve’s amazing. He’s sweet, courageous, a gentleman, someone to look up to. Hell, Bucky looked up to him. Even when Steve was that scrawny kid in Brooklyn, Bucky admired his bravery and good heart.
Steve was a good man. Bucky was a broken one.
“Oh no, who’s victim to your impenetrable stare now?” Natasha asked as she approached him.
“I’m not staring,” he mumbled, pushing off from where he was leaning on the bar and turned his back to the dance floor.
“Sure, and Tony isn’t drunk.”
“Got the fire extinguisher on deck?” He downed the rest of his drink and left the glass on the bar.
She chuckled, “yup.” Natasha walked around behind the counter and grabbed herself a fresh wine glass. “You know, if you ask her to dance, she’ll say yes.”
Bucky hated it when she saw right through him. For a woman with no enhanced abilities, Natasha sure had a way of reading people.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You’ve been watching her all night, Barnes.”
He cringed, “It sounds creepy when you put it like that.”
Natasha shook her head and smiled as she continued to pour herself a glass of red wine. “Then don’t put so much distance between yourselves. Maybe actually talk to her, ask her to dance.”
“She’s already dancing with Steve,” he answered, looking down at the counter.
She raised an eyebrow at him in fake confusion. “That’s not jealousy I hear, is it?”
“I’m not jealous,” Bucky quickly rebutted. He paused while his jaw clenched. “I just don’t wanna bother her.”
Natasha sighed as she put the bottle away. “You don’t bother her. Believe me.”
He crossed his arms, “how would you know that?”
She carefully swirled the red liquid in her glass. “The same way I know that you’ve wanted to dance with her all night.”
Bucky stared at her with annoyance and disbelief written all over his face. Natasha stared back at him with a slight smirk knowing she was right.
Their staring contest was abruptly interrupted by Thor stumbling towards the bar.
“Romanoff! Barnes! How are you enjoying the festivities?” Thor beamed. Bucky couldn’t tell if Thor was just that excited or if he was bordering on intoxicated.
”I’ve been having a wonderful night but“ —Natasha gestured towards Bucky— “I don’t think he’s in a partying mood.”
Thor looked at him with a slight pout. Yeah he was probably a bit intoxicated, Bucky thought.
”That sounds terrible. We need to fix that right away.” Thor rushed to the cabinet to grab a fancy looking bottle and two clean short glasses. He set the bottle on the counter across from Bucky and waved a hand behind it to show it off.
“I brought this back from my most recent trip to Asgard. It has aged for a thousand years. It’s too strong for mortal men, but you my friend” —he patted Bucky on the shoulder— “are well suited for it.”
Thor poured some of the drink into each glass and pushed one closer to Bucky. “This should help raise your spirits.”
He stared at the honey colored liquid hesitantly before picking it up. “Thanks pal.” He offered a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.
Thor raised his drink to the man across from him. Bucky took another look before raising his drink and clinking it with Thors. He took a sip and found it to be sweeter than he expected.
It was also much stronger than he expected.
Thanks to the discount super serum he received, he couldn’t get drunk. Bucky hasn’t been drunk since 1945, the last time he went out to a bar with the howling commandos.
After two and a half of whatever that Norse drink was, he was starting to get that dizzying buz he hasn’t felt in decades. He wasn’t as drunk as Thor or Tony were, but he was feeling more confident than he had been earlier in the night.
He wouldn’t bother to hide the glances he threw your way. At some point he got rid of his jacket and rolled up his sleeves. If someone asked if he did that because he was warm or because he wanted to show off to you, he wouldn’t have answered. But it was pretty clear when he noticed you looking at him and he would stand up straighter or flex his arms.
Then of course when you caught his eyes he winked at you and then smiled when he saw how bashful you looked.
Bucky was definitely having a better night than before. And it just kept getting better the more he interacted with you.
His favorite —but also least favorite— part of the night was when he accidentally ran into you.
He was leaving the bathroom at the same time you were. As he turned the corner he stumbled into your side, not expecting you to be there. As Bucky collided with you, you yelped and almost fell down yourself.
“Shit, I’m so sorry,” he apologized as he tried to regain his balance.
You grabbed onto his arm and helped him stand straight. “It’s fine, no worries.”
His chest ached at the feeling of your hands on his bicep.
A look of confusion crossed your face before you asked, “are you drunk?”
”No.”
You raised an eyebrow at him; your expression screaming that you don’t believe him.
“Maybe,” he mumbled.
You scoffed and let go of his arm, cautiously as you made sure he wasn’t going to fall over. “I thought guys like you and Steve couldn’t get drunk.”
“We can’t. But Thor gave me this funky Asgardian beer.” Bucky's words slurred together as he explained.
“I think it’s mead.”
He looked baffled, “what’s mead?”
You shook your head amused, “not beer.”
He scoffed and pointed an accusatory finger at you. “Don’t talk like I can't smell the tequila on your breath,” he joked.
You playfully swatted at his arm away using very little force. “Shut up, it’s the first time I’ve let loose in a long time.”
He loved seeing you riled up. You looked so adorable.
”You should do it more often.”
”Drink?
“No, come to these stupid parties,” he gestured down the hall to where music was coming from.
“I will if you’ll be there,” you replied in a sweet tone. You sounded more forward than he was used to. He was a bit surprised but decided to lean into it.
“Is that a promise?”
“Maybe.”
“Good,” Bucky smiled as he remembered what it meant when you said maybe to plans.
He hoped you would keep showing up. He’d go to every single one of those dumb parties if he knew he’d see you there.
“I like seeing you like this. More social, having fun. No more hiding in your room.”
“I didn’t hide,” you protested, even though you knew he was right.
“You avoided us like the plague,” he countered. “For a while I thought you didn’t like me,”
Your jaw dropped at his confession. “You thought I didn’t like you?” Your voice sounded both a bit worried and surprised.
“You never spoke to me!”
“I gave you cookies!”
“But that was like-“ he paused to do the mental math, “three months after we met. Before that I wasn’t sure.”
You relaxed as you settled with the information. “Okay, but it wasn’t just you. I didn’t talk to anybody,” you answered with a shrug.
“And look at you now.” He gestured to you with a small smile of admiration. “Going to parties, spending time with us. You looked like you were really having fun.”
Your eyes lit up with a look of realization as you leaned back against the wall. “Wow, you were watching me?” You teased him.
Bucky should’ve known that would come and bite him in the ass, again.
“I wouldn’t say watching.”
You squinted at him, that glimmer still present in your eyes, “hmm sounds like you were.
“I can’t help it, not when you look like that,” he said in a sultry voice.
You tilted your head, “like what?”
Bucky licked his lips as he fully took you in. Even as your makeup took the toll of the night, you still looked perfect to him. Your eyeliner was a bit smudged and your lips still shimmered from the left over gloss. He gazed down at your dress, it had a flowy skirt that hid some of your curves but a slit down the side that gave him a view of your leg.
“Like the most beautiful woman at this party.”
You rolled your eyes at him. “Come on,” you playfully dismissed his compliment.
Bucky took a step closer to you. “I’m serious, I couldn’t take my eyes off you,” he continued as his voice got lower.
Your cheeks turned pink and your voice raised in pitch, “you’re such a flirt, Barnes.”
“Maybe,” he returned with a smirk. “Doesn’t change the fact that you are breathtaking.”
Now your face was crimson. You tried to bite back a giddy smile but he could see right through you.
“Stop being so sweet, it’s making me want to kiss you.”
Bucky's heart pounded in his ears and he felt his face start to heat up. He desperately hoped you weren’t kidding.
He quickly glanced at your lips and leaned closer. “Oh yeah? What’s stopping you?”
Your eyes slightly widened at his question, like you weren’t expecting him to take you so seriously. He watched the contemplation in your features as you stared back at him.
Hidden behind his confident exterior, Bucky’s stomach was churning as he awaited your response. Even with the alcohol swimming through his bloodstream, he still had a lingering cloud of anxiety telling him you really didn’t want to kiss him. Telling him that you didn’t want him.
“Right now?” You whispered. You looked up at him with those doe eyes that made him weak in the knees.
Your gaze darted between his and lingered on his lips. “Nothing,” you breathed before capturing his lips in yours.
Bucky was taken by surprise at your forwardness, his lips froze for a split second before moving in rhythm with yours. You reached up, placing your hands on his neck and face. He sighed against your mouth as you pulled him down closer to you, desperate to taste him.
Bucky’s hands traveled up and down your hips, starved for more of your touch. His metal hand settled at your waist while his right hand slipped past the slit in your dress and grabbed at your thigh. You leaned into him, your back arching off the wall you were pressed up against and your leg wrapped around his, pulling him closer. He continued to paw at your thigh, his hand sneaking higher and higher, finding its place on your ass. A soft moan escaped you, trapped against Bucky’s lips. The sound tasted like heaven to him.
Asgardian alcohol was nothing compared to the intoxicating drink that was you. Bucky was lost in the touch, the smell, the feel of you. He breathed you in like it was his first breath of fresh air in years.
It was like the earth stopped spinning just for you two. Time was put on pause and there in that secluded hallway, you and Bucky were the only people in the world.
Of course, you were in fact not the only people in the world, let alone that party. While your lips were still interlocked and hands grabbing at each other, footsteps inched closer.
Immediately you pulled away from each other at the startled gasp of, “holy shit!”
Bucky and you froze in horror at the man across the hall.
Neither of you noticed Tony approaching around the corner. He stared at you with shock written all over his face, which then transformed into a cheeky grin.
“Wow, and to think you two almost didn’t show up.” He pointed at both of you, “If you guys get married, I better get credit in your vows.”
“Stark,” Bucky warned in a sharp tone, staring daggers at the man in question.
Tony raised his hands in surrender. “Don’t mind me. Please, go back to eating each other's faces.” He chuckled before retreating down the hall back to the party.
Bucky sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Even after he cut it he couldn’t shake the habit.
He couldn’t look you in the eyes yet, still too flustered. “He’s such an ass,” he joked, shaking his head.
You fixed your hair and offered a nervous smile. “Yeah, I know,” you mumbled.
The air in the room wasn’t the same after Tony walked in. The realization of what you were doing had caught up to both of you. Bucky had wanted to kiss you long before now, he just never expected it to be a spur of the moment first kiss.
That doesn’t mean he regretted it. Not one bit.
“We should probably return to the party.” Bucky cleared his throat, “listen I know it might be a bit awkward when we get back but, I wanted to ask if-“
”I’m sorry, I um,” you interrupted with a slight panic in your voice.
“I’m gonna go. Have a good rest of your night Bucky,” you excused yourself with a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes.
Bucky watched you shuffle away and down the hall, in the opposite direction of the party. His posture deflated as his stare lingered from where you left. He tried to ignore the slight ache in his chest but it stayed, infecting his heart like a poison.
Finally when he had the chance and nerve to ask you to dance, you ran away.
_____
From when he returned to the party to the next morning when he woke up, that ache didn’t fully go away. It became quieter, more tolerable to deal with. But still present.
He tried to dilute it with reasonable answers. You might have still been flustered from being caught in the hallway. You might have been more drunk than he thought and didn’t feel well.
But his train of thought always returned to anxiety and doubt. The voice in the back of his head that told him you didn’t want to be seen with him. You were embarrassed to be seen kissing him. The voice that screamed he wasn’t good enough and you would never have feelings for him.
For now he would shove down those left over doubts. Try to ignore them the best he could.
Unfortunately that wasn’t an option when he was hounded at breakfast.
When he walked in the kitchen, he felt the tone change. It was subtle, but as Sam, Clint, and Yelena’s conversation died down, he sensed multiple pairs of eyes landing on him.
“So Bucky, how was your night?” Sam asked before sipping his coffee.
Bucky walked to the coffee machine and grabbed his own mug from the cabinet. “It was good,” he muttered.
Yelena spun in her chair to face him, “you had fun?”
“Sure, I guess.”
Sam quirked an eyebrow at him. “You guess?”
“Why do you care so much?” Bucky groaned as he poured a fresh cup of coffee for himself.
“No reason, just wanted to see what you thought of the party.”
Bucky shrugged, turning back around to face the group. “It was like every other party.”
“You don’t get drunk at every other party,” Sam countered in a snarky tone.
“I was not that drunk,” Bucky protested.
“Drunk enough to get freaky in the hallway?”
Sam’s question had Bucky gripping his mug so hard he almost shattered it. Anger seeped into his bloodstream that made his veins hot.
Bucky squeezed his eyes shut and hung his head. “Stark, that son of a bitch,” he grumbled under his breath.
Yelena's interest was piqued at Bucky's reaction, confirming her suspicions. “So it’s true? You and Y/N kissed?”
“Oh they did more than kiss,” Sam added.
“Sam,” Bucky warned with a sharp tone.
“Did you see him peacocking? He kept flexing his arm muscles at her and at one point I think I saw him wink. I guess all that paid off.” Clint finally added his thoughts, amusement creeping its way onto his face.
Yelena sat with a smile, still processing the information. “Wow, I didn’t think you two would get together for another month or more.”
“We’re not together,” Bucky corrected. The words tasted like a nasty poison on his tongue.
“You will be soon,” Clint insisted.
“Don’t bet on it.”
“What are you talking about? Sam asked. “You like this girl. You’ve been crushing on her for months!”
Bucky’s jaw clenched before. His stomach boiled over with the feelings he tried to push down.
He shook his head and waved them off. “Never mind.”
Yelena leaned forward, eager to understand. ”No wait, Bucky what happened?” She asked calmly, voice filled with concern.
He sighed and stuffed his hands in his pockets. His lips sealed shut while he stared at the floor, contemplating how honest he should be with them.
“It’s nothing. After Stark walked in on us she didn’t exactly tell me how she felt about the kiss.” Bucky nervously ran a hand through his short hair. “I tried to ask her to dance. She left before I could spit it out.”
“She’s a shy girl. She was probably overwhelmed and embarrassed.” Clint offered.
Not embarrassed because of you, Bucky tried to remind himself.
Sam stepped closer to Bucky, his tone of voice much more serious than before. “Just talk to her about it. I’m sure she feels the same way.”
Bucky looked down in his mug, the hot black coffee staring back at him. “Have any of you seen or talked to her yet? It’s still early. I don't know if she’s awake.”
”No, she hasn’t been down here yet,” Yelena answered.
Clint grabbed out his phone, “I’ll text her-“
”No, Clint,” Bucky cringed.
Clint held up a hand to him, still typing away on his screen. “Calm down, I’m telling her about the doughnuts I bought.”
Bucky’s tense shoulders relaxed at the explanation.
“Let me know if you find out she’s awake. I’d hate to wake her up just to pester her about this.” He grabbed his coffee and a doughnut for himself from the box on the counter.
“Leave a chocolate frosted,” he instructed as he walked to the lounge. “She only likes those.”
____
It’s been three days.
In the last three days, he’s seen you once. When you tip-toed into the kitchen, barely looking him in the eyes.
He already thought about you every day. He’d leave his room with anticipation, eager for the chance to see you.
Now that same anticipation had a sour taste. Bucky would go to the gym, lounge, or kitchen with hope that he would see you there. And every time he was crushed at the sight of a room without your presence.
You had gotten pretty successful at staying hidden. After that brief awkward encounter on Saturday, you made yourself completely undetectable. He should’ve known it would be an easy feat for you considering you were a spy before joining the Avengers. The only indication that you were even still in the compound were the clean dishes on the drying rack and the missing food from the fridge.
Not only was Bucky missing and craving your presence, but he had to sit with the unknown meaning behind your kiss. He had no idea how you felt about him, and it drove him mad.
The lustful look In your eyes and the desperate touch of your hands on him told him that you might feel the same way. But the way you recoiled and shut yourself out said something else.
One thing he did know was that all this overthinking was going to be his downfall.
It was past midnight and instead of staying in bed, struggling to fall asleep, he decided to go to the gym and let out some stress.
Little did he know he wasn’t the only one with that same idea.
He wasn’t that surprised to see some of the lights on as he approached the gym. Every so often someone was working out late at night. Who he didn’t expect to see was you, laser focused as you striked at the punching bag.
Bucky stood still for a moment, watching you, debating whether or not he should leave you be or talk to you.
His legs seemed to be moving on their own as he approached you.
“Want some help?”
You jumped, startled out of your focus. “You scared the shit out of me!” You placed a hand over your heart, probably felt it pounding.
“Sorry,” he mumbled. “You didn’t answer my question though.”
You looked at him with puzzled, furrowed brows.
“Do you want some help?” He repeated, gesturing towards the punching bag.
You paused before answering in a calm tone. “No thanks.”
You shifted your weight and prepped your stance, attention returned to the bag.
“I thought you didn’t work out this late anymore,” Bucky commented with fake innocence.
You shrugged before you started punching again. “Guess old habits die hard.”
“Like hiding in your room?”
You hesitated. He watched your jaw clench before you punched again.
“I am not hiding.”
“I haven’t seen you in three days.”
Your punches got stronger while your voice stayed calm. “Didn’t feel well. Needed rest.”
“I texted you.”
“Sorry,” another punch. “Didn’t see it.”
Bucky exhaled, “Why are you lying?”
“I’m not-“
“Yes you are,” he interrupted, a bit of frustration leaking through his firm voice.
“We’ve barely seen you. And this isn’t like when you first got here, because I still saw you back then. You’re ignoring us.”
You’re ignoring me, he wanted to say.
Your attention broke from the punching bag. Your hand landed limp against it as you turned to him.
“Why do you care?” You asked with more curiosity than you showed on your face.
“Because I’m worried about you. And I know something’s wrong.”
You didn’t reply. Just stared at the floor and picked at the wraps on your hands.
Bucky didn’t want to pester you about it, but he had to stop you from isolating and keeping everything bottled up. He knew better than anyone what that felt like. The desire to hide away and run.
He could see the walls you built up slowly starting to crack, but you held on so tight to that security. Desperate to not let it fall down.
He was going to get you to open up, whether it hurt him or not.
“Is this about the kiss?”
Your eyes squeezed shut and fists clenched. “Bucky, I really don’t want to talk about that right now.”
“Well when do you feel like talking about it?” He interrogated, folding his arms. “Tomorrow? A week from now?”
“Fine!” You snapped back at him. “We got drunk, flirted a little and kissed. Can we just put this behind us and forget about it?”
Forget about it? You really want him to forget about the kiss? The best kiss of his life. The kiss that brought warmth back into his cold veins. Forget the kiss that made all the decades worth of tension fall off his bones and disappear for a few minutes.
He scoffed, “I’m sorry but I can’t just forget about it.”
Your cheeks that were previously pink from your work out turned red.
Bucky kept his gaze trained on you. He watched your eyes repeatedly dart away from him, still trying to hide while you stood right in front of him.
“Why did you leave after we kissed?” He asked, keeping his voice steady even while his insides were twisting.
“Bucky,” you groaned, pleading with the man in front of you.
“I gotta know.”
You looked down at your hands and resumed picking at the wrappings.
“Did you mean it?” You inquired, deflecting from his question. “What you said that night.”
He pursed his lips, trying to mentally sort through all the things he said. “Which part?”
You paused your fidgeting, hands tense as you spoke. “All those nice things you said about me. When you said I was the most beautiful woman at that party.” You finally looked at Bucky, eyes swimming with uncertainty.
“Did you mean it, or were you just flirting?”
You were trying to hide behind a guarded expression, but Bucky could see the vulnerability in your eyes and hear it in your voice.
You felt the same way about him.
But just like him, you didn’t believe your feelings were reciprocated because of the overwhelming fear. Your vision was clouded by fear and doubt.
He took a few steps closer. You took a half step back.
His eyes stayed on you. He never wavered.
”I meant all of it,” he answered softly. “Every single word.”
Your eyes widened and lips parted.
“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.”
You gave him a nervous grin and shook your head as you tried removing the wrapping from your hands. ”That’s overselling it a bit,” you lightly joked. You fought the hand wrap with a shaky hand, struggling to take it off.
Bucky inched closer. Before you could register what he was doing, he reached forward and gently grabbed your hands. He separated them and continued undoing the wrapping for you. His touch was soft as he handled you with the utmost care.
“I’m being serious,” he started, eyes trained on your hand. “Whether you believe me or not.”
He finished working on your left hand and moved to your right. You didn’t protest. You didn’t stop him.
“If you really want to forget about the kiss. Go ahead.” But now he knew you didn’t want to forget about it. He swallowed, preparing to place his own heart in the palm of your hand. “I don’t think I could ever forget it. I haven’t stopped thinking about you since Friday.”
He chuckled as a blush crept its way on his face. “Actually, I haven’t stopped thinking about you since the first time we met.”
He felt your hand freeze against his. “Bucky, that was over 6 months ago,” you reminded him breathlessly.
He finished unwrapping your hand, looked up at you, and nodded. “Yeah, I know,” he muttered.
Bucky still held your hand, neither one of you moved away from the other.
You took a deep breath, the expression on your face looked like you were mentally wrestling with yourself.
“What were you going to ask me before I left?” You asked cautiously.
“If you wanted to dance with me.” The corners of his mouth turned up into a smile as his cheeks turned pink. He softly caressed the back of your hand, “I’d been trying to ask you all night but never got the chance. Or the nerve.”
Bucky searched your eyes and found wide pupils in a sea of emotion. He wasn’t sure if they shined from the lighting or if they were glossy.
You licked your lips, “I would’ve said yes by the way. If you asked.”
He smirked back, stomach fluttering with butterflies. “You mean if you let me ask?” he asked, tone laced with sarcasm.
You rolled your eyes and sighed, “yeah. I was just being an asshole.“
“You’re not an asshole,” he countered, genuinely.
You squinted and tilted your head. “I was a little bit.”
He chuckled in defeat, his thumb still tracing your skin.
You peered down at your hand intertwined with his, swallowing down the nerves caught in your throat. “I uh- I was scared and catastrophizing. I thought of the worst case scenario and let it control me. I shouldn’t have run away, I’m sorry.” You sounded small, defeated.
With his free metal hand, Bucky gently pulled your chin up to look at him. “You’re not the only one who gets stuck in their own head,” he comforted. Your breath shuttered as his touch traveled to the side of your face before brushing your hair behind your ear. “Just don’t shut the world out okay?”
You nodded, with a bashful smile. “Okay.”
Bucky’s mouth curled up in a way that matched yours. “I love your smile,” he complimented, his voice dripping with admiration.
You bit your lip as a blush danced across your face. “Don’t say sweet things about me. It’ll make me want to kiss you,” you warned with a teasing hint in your tone.
Bucky's smile turned to a wicked grin. He leaned closer, his lips ghosting over yours as he caressed your cheek. “What’s so wrong with that?” He whispered with desire.
He felt your breath against him as you whispered back.
“Nothing.”
Bucky wasted no time and captured your lips with his. He instinctively reached for your waist and pulled you closer, flush against him.
This kiss was different from the first one. You still tasted the same on his tongue, your lips left the same imprint on his. But the rhythm was different. No rush of passion. No hunger that needed to be resolved.
It was slower, more delicate. Like the two of you were absorbing the others' existence into your bloodstream.
When you separated from him Bucky chased after your lips. You giggled as he pecked all over your lips and cheeks. Your laugh only spurred him on more as he grabbed on to your face to keep you still and smiled against your skin.
You made him feel lovesick. He felt like he used to, back in the 40s, before everything went wrong. He felt like Bucky Barnes.
Bucky chuckled as he finally retreated from his kissing attack on your face. He stared at you lovingly, his hands traveling back down to your hips.
“So, hypothetically, if I were to ask if you wanted to go dancing, like we find somewhere in the city we can go to dance one night, what would you say?”
You looked up at him with a sweet smile. “Is this a hypothetical or are you asking me out?” You pondered with a mischievous tone.
Bucky loved it when you teased him like that. You were going to drive him insane.
“I’m asking you out.”
You stood up straighter, your eyes pierced him with confidence. “Then do it.”
Warmth stirred in his chest as he finally asked what he’s been meaning to for so long.
“Would you like to go dancing with me?”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and placed a soft, quick kiss against his lips. “I’d love to.”
_____
The lounge was quiet. Yelena sat on the couch with Wanda as a movie played in the distance. Steve sat on one of the chairs ignoring the movie, his nose deep in a small notebook he liked to sketch in. Natasha sat on the other chair, her back and legs against the arm rests as she focused on a book.
The elevator dinged when it reached the floor. As it opened, Bucky walked out and passed through the lounge with you in his arms bridal style and barefoot, holding your heels in your hands.
All of their eyes slowly peered away from what they were doing and towards you and Bucky.
Natasha was the first to comment on the display, “uh, Barnes, why are you carrying your date?”
“I complained my feet hurt on the way home and now he won’t put me down,” you announced back to her.
Bucky abruptly stopped in his tracks. “Do you want to walk back to your room?” He asked, voice deep with a teasing tone.
You sunk further into his chest as a blush crept onto your face. “No,” you mumbled quietly.
He chuckled and continued walking. “That’s what I thought.”
“Awe, what a gentleman,” Yelena remarked.
“Anything for my girl,” Bucky yelled back as he walked away with you in his arms.
“Finally, I’ve been waiting for them to get together for weeks!” Yelena joked as she turned back to the group.
“Try months. I knew that when she started leaving her room it was because of him,” Natasha added.
Steve looked up from his notebook, a small glint of amusement in his eyes. “Why do you think I pushed for him to go to that party? I had a feeling she would go if she knew he would be there.”
“Seems like everyone knew but them,” Yelena remarked.
“I’ve known the whole time.” Wanda chuckled, “For two quiet people, their thoughts are awfully loud.”
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