Out of Context

[manwaifu]

[underthepalmsweare-deactivated2]

>:I

[maudelebowski29]

[the-memedaddy]

Me📷irl

[mixedican-deactivated20190330]

[glumshoe]

I like haunted houses in theory BUT I have no idea how to react when the actors speak to you. They ask me a question and I just… answer it…

The scariest part of a haunted house is the unscripted social interaction.

[glumshoe]

Scary nurse in a creepy voice: “Do you have an appointment to see the doctor?”

Me: “Uh. Do you accept walk-ins?”

[glumshoe]

Scary farmer: “I like to kill people!”

My friend, brightly: “I like to die!”

[puerto-nic0]

Zombie : “AARRRGH”

Me : “Do you get dental insurance?”

Zombie : “TEETH!!”

[schmergo]

This happened to me.

Scary prison dude: HELLO

Me: Nice to meet you!

Him: (pause) No it’s noooooot

[batsalmighty]

My worst horror house experience was when I couldn’t find the (rather obvious) exit and the guy chasing me with a chainsaw stopped, sighed and pointed me to the exit, saying “please scream as loud as you can when you run out there” and just left. I disappointed the horror house chainsaw dude and I will never get over that

[tired-wolfe]

Guy: They are all my friends.. (motioning to hanging corpses; then grabs a noose) Will you be my friend?  Me: Sure totally, you made me a friendship necklace? Oh my god your so sweet?  Guy: … Yes.. Please, let me.. I cant I cant just go (laughing).  – Got to walk a second time through–  Same guy: My friends -wailing-  Me: I came back I just really wanted to be friends so bad Guy: (laughing more) Please, Im not allowed to laugh. 

[hoardofhyperfixations]

I went to a Haunted House and literally befriended every actor there.

Specifically, I remember;

There were zombies walking around in the waiting room. I said “Hi!” and he gave me a high five. Every time he passed from then on, I got a high five.

Near the end, there were these twin little girls. “Come play with us.” They said. “Okay!” I said. “Forever.” They said. “Oh, sorry, can’t do that. I’m busy.”

I could hear them giggling.

[imanicepersoniswear]

Guy playing Freddie Kruger: Remember, you are all my children!

Me: thanks dad

A small chorus of teenagers: thanks dad

[space-snake]

I went to a haunted house once and ended up recognizing a guy from school as one of the actors

Me, brightly: hi Kenneth!

Kenneth: shh!

[sixpenceee]

Giant animatronic dinosaur outside BBC headquarters 🦕 

[manwaifu]

[underthepalmsweare-deactivated2]

>:I

[celebrityho]

How peaceful is this? Little finches enjoying the water last night’s rain brought

[sicklizardman]

Pokemon & Darkest Dungeon starters.

[brujite-de-gulubu]

@brainfondue

[freshest-memes]

Roman emperor in a lower temperature

[unlimited-nice-works]

Nero below zero

[thebigiron-official]

Caesar in the freezer

[ranilla-bean]

dictator in the refrigerator

foul pest in the ice chest

old in the cold

genocide in the freezer’s insides

[ernest-shackleton]

PIECE OF SHIT IN THE COLD PIT

[endermaz]

is this a brooklyn 99 cold open

[paradisiak]

Reno 911 was the epitome of comedy

[whitepeopletwitter]

[tealfruit]

I’m making bread

[tealfruit]

bread boys

[tealfruit]

my sons!

THEY’RE DELICIOUS

[tealfruit]

frog bread was tagged explicit. reblog the forbidden frog bread for luck and power

[thehuglife]

This is my new favorite non threatening threat

[charlesoberonn]

The Kirby Cycle

There is only one step

And it is Kirby

[tryingtofeelsomething]

[joey-wheeler-official]

i swear to god if i had seen shitty car mods daily as the source i would have killed a man

[obesitysherpa]

Never has a meme so accurately depicted my career as a marketer. Seriously, don’t go into marketing. The people you work for just suck the life out of you

[marisatomay]