The Beauty of Waiting and Second Chances: Taking my NMC OSCE twice to be a UKRN.
This is a testimony of a journey I had and still a continuing journey here on earth being a nurse. Since I wrote on my previous blog about being here in UK since March 2020, this phase of my life is full of waiting.
Since we arrived during the first lockdown, all universities were closed and we cannot take the NMC OSCE to be a fully pledged nurse in England. THIS IS THE FIRST WAITING GAME. After months of waiting, we were finally booked a slot to take the exam in Oxford Brookes University. The first question that came up to my mind: Why did the hospital booked us in Oxford Brookes? If you see the passing rate in Oxford Brookes, it has the lowest passing rate among the other test centres and hearing some feedback from other nurses that this test centre is strict in every way.
Then I was reminded by the Lord: You’ve waited and prayed for this to be scheduled, why are you complaining?
I was silenced with what the Lord impressed to me. The only thing I can do is pray and study.
Study days with the Filipino community came and it made me felt so weak because some study days were scheduled during my working days. It’s so hard to juggle work and studies. It feels detrimental. But God has His own ways of providing our needs. With the remaining days left in preparation for the OSCE, I amjust grateful to all people who focused on teaching and assessing us one skill at a time. During my personal time with the Lord, I always asked Him: Lord, You’ve been with me all throughout those exams, IELTS and CBT, and we did it in just one shot. We can do this in a shot as well. I prayed. I pleaded. I waited.
The day of examination came and all I prayed was just favor and presence of mind, and above all else, MAY HIS WILL BE DONE. It’s hard to say those words because we don’t know if His will is painful or otherwise.
THE SECOND WAITING GAME. After 4 days of waiting, I’ve seen my cohort mates in facebook posting their result; okay the results are in, let’s see what I’ve got in my email. I FAILED. I FAILED 1 out of 6 stations. I don’t know what happened that time but I didn’t cry. Instead I was jumping because I was expecting to fail my Implementation station and turned out I failed one of my skill exam. I was asking myself, “ Am I really okay? or am I in the denial stage?” but I know I’ve accepted the fact of failing. Lord, is this You teaching me the beauty of retakes and second chances? I prayed. I just thanked God for allowing me to pass the other 5 stations and praying that a resit would be scheduled immediately. THE THIRD WAITING GAME.
The nice thing is that you will only resit the station that you failed which gives you more focus in studying.
Thank God for the answers of prayers, we were immediately scheduled for a resit a just after a few days.
I thought that the nerves will just calm down because it’s just only one skill. Lo and behold, anxiety was still knocking on my doorstep and I eventually opened it. The day of resit came. It was a cold, windy, rainy day, but as we were riding the train to Oxford I asked the Lord “What’s Your plan Lord? Will I make it? Or if not, can I still endure to make it through to have a 3rd attempt?” Then the resit happened. I was just amazed how I handled myself in that same room I failed from before. He is awesome!
After the exam, the question was re-echoing in my mind: “What’s Your plan Lord? Will I make it? Or if not, can I still endure to make it through to have a 3rd attempt?”
I know that I am that kind of person who overthinks a lot and I know it is not healthy and not God-glorifying. I was reminded by His word during a Sunday-service that I attended:
1 Peter 5:6-7
6Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
I stopped overthinking about it. I realized that it was killing the joy in me and just entrust it to the Lord because above all else, His will be done and whatever His will is, it will always be the best for me. AFTER 4 DAYS OF WAITING. I woke up in the morning, my 2nd day away from work, I was about to go to the toilet and I was just allowing my phone to download new emails, There I read a new email from NMC: “CONGRATULATIONS ON PASSING THE PART 2-TEST OF COMPETENCY....” I just jumped and shouted. Inside the toilet. HAHA!
God is able. We may not get it in the timeline that we want but in His eyes, it was not a delay in getting this blessing. He made all things beautiful in His time. JIREH FAITH ABAYA, PHRN, UKRN Humbled. Tested. Blessed.
