Hello people! I know I appeared out of the blue and this is my first time on Tumblr so, I'm gonna try my best in understanding how I see BPD. (I don't have BPD myself and I am not here to act as a therapist, I am here simply sharing my insights with an experience I had with a person with BPD. I am not here to act like a savior, but I am here to make you guys feel seen and heard) I hope this post makes you guys feel understood because you guys deserve it whether you like it or not. And it's very long so long rant ahead, CHOO-CHOO!! 🚂 🚂
As a person with a friend who has BPD, I understand that it is so hard to live with a disorder that's been tearing your life apart slowly. I may not know and understand her the fullest and I may not fully understand her experiences, but I know she is one of the nicest people that has ever entered my life. "Oh but BPD people sucks, they don't care, they-" shhh no I don't care about your negative opinions about them because we also have to remember that they're humans experiencing very complicated emotions that they quite can't place. I know some people say that a person with BPD is evil and bad and that you can't get along with them but to be honest, I think that's just bullshit because I don't believe that people with BPD are evil or somewhat villains. Sure some may come of as mean but that doesn't mean that they're entirely evil. Splitting is a very common defense mechanism for a person with BPD and it's very hard for some people to understand it., because what comes off as a perfect something can go off as a shitty thing that you ever experienced in a moment. Some people say that that's the reason why they say "BPD people sucks" but it's sad that they don't even take time to understand what and how they're feel.
Hey there, my friend! I know I may not fully know how you feel or how you go through life and I may not know you in the fullest since this is just an online webpage but who cares? I am here to remind you that ITS OKAY TO FEEL. It's okay to need someone, it's okay to hurt, it's okay to feel dramatic, it's okay to feel hysterical, it's okay. You know why? Because you're a beautiful human being feeling things. Sure it's more complicated than others but it doesn't make you less human or more of a monster. Sometimes, or maybe everytime, life gets hard, it always falls down on you everytime you try to do something good but let me tell you what my friend: I know some people think of you guys as monsters but for me, I don't. It breaks my heart to see some of you think that you guys are unlovable and hated and you think that that's the truth, but the truth is that you're just not surrounding yourselves with the right people. I believe that someone out there loves you despite your disorder and will treat you as a human being, not as an animal even when you think it's never going to happen, oh no honey it will, just not yet. I believe that you guys are completely capable of healing, yes I am aware that BPD isn't curable but it is treatable okay? You may not be able to fix yourself but what you can do is improve. Those feelings right there inside of you deserves to be felt no matter how much it hurts. You know why my friend? Because, when you end up neglecting those feelings inside you, you go numb, yet it grows more. My friend, you have to be honest about how bad it feels so that you can move on. No suppressing those feelings honey, that's not allowed. And I know some of you guys SH, and that's not a healthy coping mechanism right there. It may silence the pain on the inside but it's never going to silence the pain that your feeling forever because it's only temporary. You really need to stop harming yourself and let your soul heal, let your body heal. Your dependence on someone doesn't define you as a person, it's your character who defines you not your disorder. You're capable of healing. You're capable of being loved. You're capable of loving. You're capable of being happy. You guys deserve so much understanding and patience and the people who don't are just miserable people trying to bring you guys down. Don't listen to the voices that are bringing you down and tearing you apart, listen to the voices thats holding you together as a whole. I know it's hard, but you can get through this. Hurting is a part of healing and healing isn't linear. It's not perfect, it's messy and complicated and that's what makes it worth it. If you ever hate yourself, please don't hate yourself bro. It's your disorder making you act like that, not yourself. BPD sucks and I understand. You also deserve all the comfort in the world because you guys are just misunderstood souls that aren't looked into deeper. I know you guys are scared of changing because changing always meant shedding away the things you've wanted to hold onto in the past but you have to let go okay? Even if it hurts, let go. Again, you have to be honest how bad it feels so that you can move on. Just because your pain is next to you, it doesn't mean you have to be left alone with it okay? You're not alone. I know it sounds cheesy and cliche but it is true. This community is really showing you guys that you aren't alone in feeling bad. Just so you know that even if this is just a post, I am here for you. You may not know me and I may not know you but I know how it feels so much to hurt. To lose someone, to get misunderstood, I know. If you're planning to commit, please don't because, there are so much in life that you didn't get to see yet. The fact that you're reading this post shows a sign that you wanted to find a reason to stay. I may not know it but I know it gets beautiful, it just depends on how you see it. Please stay bro. Stay. Even if you think that you're still that same monster as before, you aren't going to be that "same monster" forever.
