Udder Insanity

Female, 24, grad student, roleplayer. I enjoy murder mysteries, fantasy, sci-fi, history, and dressing up, and I have a ridiculous sense of humor.

[princesconsuela]

being in your 20s like

[brightdarkly]

So when I saw this picture for the new Pixar movie Inside Out,

at first I thought the characters were three women and two aliens, but after seeing the trailer I realized the purple and red things were supposed to be dudes. After tracing their faces, I figured out why I was so weirded out:

[magictransistor]

John Philipps Emslie, The Sun and Solar Phenomena, Comets and Aerolites, Transparent Chart of the Heavens & The Earth’s Annual Revolutions Round The Sun (And Its Diurnal Rotation On Its Axis), c. 1853.

[decorkiki]

Here’s a breakdown on Makeup Brushes. Hope it helps someone!

Shop KikiCloset or KikiModo

[plumpling]

Thaaan k u

[fashion-runways]

LENA HOSCHEK Fall/Winter RTW 2015

[armellin]

Most of these came right from my dream…

[whatshouldwecallgradschool]

WHY IT'S IMPORTANT TO EXERCISE WHILE IN GRAD SCHOOL

credit: redheadextinction

[leembutt]

Saying that a bisexual person has become straight/gay because they’re going out with someone of a particular sex is like saying that someone has become a vegetarian because they had a salad for lunch

[angerr]

A List of “Men’s Rights” Issues That Feminism Is Already Working On Feminists do not want you to lose custody of your children. The assumption that women are naturally better caregivers is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not like commercials in which bumbling dads mess up the laundry and competent wives have to bustle in and fix it. The assumption that women are naturally better housekeepers is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want you to have to make alimony payments. Alimony is set up to combat the fact that women have been historically expected to prioritize domestic duties over professional goals, thus minimizing their earning potential if their “traditional” marriages end. The assumption that wives should make babies instead of money is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want anyone to get raped in prison. Permissiveness and jokes about prison rape are part of rape culture, which is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want anyone to be falsely accused of rape. False rape accusations discredit rape victims, which reinforces rape culture, which is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want you to be lonely and we do not hate “nice guys.” The idea that certain people are inherently more valuable than other people because of superficial physical attributes is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want you to have to pay for dinner. We want the opportunity to achieve financial success on par with men in any field we choose (and are qualified for), and the fact that we currently don’t is part of patriarchy. The idea that men should coddle and provide for women, and/or purchase their affections in romantic contexts, is condescending and damaging and part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want you to be maimed or killed in industrial accidents, or toil in coal mines while we do cushy secretarial work and various yarn-themed activities. The fact that women have long been shut out of dangerous industrial jobs (by men, by the way) is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want you to commit suicide. Any pressures and expectations that lower the quality of life of any gender are part of patriarchy. The fact that depression is characterized as an effeminate weakness, making men less likely to seek treatment, is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want you to be viewed with suspicion when you take your child to the park (men frequently insist that this is a serious issue, so I will take them at their word). The assumption that men are insatiable sexual animals, combined with the idea that it’s unnatural for men to care for children, is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want you to be drafted and then die in a war while we stay home and iron stuff. The idea that women are too weak to fight or too delicate to function in a military setting is part of patriarchy. Feminists do not want women to escape prosecution on legitimate domestic violence charges, nor do we want men to be ridiculed for being raped or abused. The idea that women are naturally gentle and compliant and that victimhood is inherently feminine is part of patriarchy. Feminists hate patriarchy. We do not hate you. If you really care about those issues as passionately as you say you do, you should be thanking feminists, because feminism is a social movement actively dedicated to dismantling every single one of them. The fact that you blame feminists—your allies—for problems against which they have been struggling for decades suggests that supporting men isn’t nearly as important to you as resenting women. We care about your problems a lot. Could you try caring about ours?

Excerpt from If I Admit That Hating Men is a Thing, Will You Stop Turning it Into a Self-fulfilling Prophecy?, by Lindy West   (via exoticwild)

[plantfunerals]

soon the ancient meme god nyancat will return and slay your false meme idols. the hour of the lolcat is upon us. repent. u can haz mercy

[solarsyrup]

okay so this post made me genuinely curious about how old the lolcat meme is and apparently it’s older than the fucking internet

this picture was taken in 1905

lolcats are older than most human beings jesus christ

[monniemoo-blog]

I don't get why everyone assumes that people from that day were stuffy and humorless, they were actually hilarious

[mahaldaddy-blog]

[sararye]

AND THAT IS HOW YOU USE AN EFFECTS PEDAL

my asshole was gaping the entire song this is insane

[tex--talks-deactivated20170126]

I had to watch that twice how could I not

[sharkiealami]

WHAT MAGNIFICENT MUSIC IS THIS

[la-shangri]

I didn’t want it to end.

[did-you-know]

Source

[dat-soldier]

back the fuck up

[sonnetscrewdriver]

There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up.

So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him.

The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off.

Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes.

[dat-soldier]

did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out

[catgoblinchelly]

This just keeps getting better

[sleepyferret]

I fucking love history.

[konec0]

ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok

so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire.

The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked.

On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap

When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro”

and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes

wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing.

and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave.

Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat. 

and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked.

[uovoc]

Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river.

Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy. 

Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows.

Zhuge Liang is legend.

[optimysticals]

I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History.

[16363662766946369-deactivated20]

[atrarchive]

a member-driven, present day, au harry potter rpg. welcome to a world that has moved on from it’s blood prejudice and dove head first into species prejudice.

play students and adults, professors, any job in the world you can think up! additionally, play species...

[monniemoo-blog]

An awesome site of which I am a member. If you're into HP roleplays, I recommend this one.

[roleplayersresources]

Ultimate Writing Resource List

A massively extended version of ruthlesscalculus’ post, collabed by Imsirius. This should help all roleplayers and writers, of novice level to advanced level, in practically any setting, even in the processes of designing their characters! While not an article...

[roleplayersresources]

The website from where this picture came from is down, unfortunately, and I haven’t been able to find who to credit. If you are the creator or knows who made this, message me so I can properly credit them.

Emotions are important in any fanfictions or roleplayer, because they humanize… or...

[rpedia]

What Not To Do, EVER! aka The Roleplaying Sins

       This list is a group of things you should 100% never ever do. Things which will automatically make you the Forever Aloner of your roleplaying crowd. These are the #1 ways to kill a roleplay, unless the roleplayers you are playing with are fairly dense or very very easy going. These are things that have proven time and time again to be the worst thing you can do forever. Please don’t do them.

Read More

[white-porcelain-skin]