I need everyone to stop posting videos of Calum being attractive on tour because I cannot risk the fate of the universe to go see them again. I also cannot afford another Calum Hood obsession in 2026 🚬
Summary: Ashton was your first love. It was a case of right person, wrong time. But sometimes, life gives you second chances.
Warnings: None, just cute and soft.
Pairing: Ashton x GN!Reader (Pretty sure GN but if you catch anything, let me know and I’ll change it to the correct pairing)
Word Count: 1.5k
Though nearly six years had passed since your last first date with Ashton, it felt as if nearly no time at all had elapsed as you sat across from him. That last first date, one that also spanned an entire evening, launched a two-year relationship. It found your first love and you felt a sort of deja vu as he easily recounted a new tale from tour.
This Ashton - years older, years wiser - was simultaneously familiar and so very different. He still carried himself with an ease you found comforting, armed with a bright smile and infectious laughter, but there were more layers now. Behind those hazel eyes lingered a deeper understanding of the world, an understanding of life that hadn’t been present at twenty-three and you did nothing to hide the soft smile that lifted the corners of your mouth as he gestured wildly.
“So, did Cal ever realize it was Luke hiding his shoes or does he still think it was Michael?”
Empty coffee cups lingered on the table, long since cleared of your dinner plates, as the restaurant slowly closed around you. Hours had passed, spent lost in conversation - catching up on lost time, listening to the melodic sound of his voice - and you knew you’d have to leave soon.
Still, rather than relaying that thought, you leaned forward with a grin as you waited for his answer.
“Think he realized after a few shows,” Ashton admitted, laughing as he idly wrapped a hand around an empty cup. “Wouldn’t surprise me if he’s waiting to get him back, though. Luke’ll have forgotten all about it by the time Cal attacks.”
“You know, it’s kinda comforting to know that no matter how much things change, some things stay the same.”
Both of you had grown since you last saw one another. Your early twenties were gone, replaced by true adulthood - a career, taxes, responsibilities that sometimes seemed overwhelming - and it was evident in the conversation you’d had. There’d been discussion of family, friends and their marriages and their children; there’d been talk of work, of the inability to recover the way you used to; there’d been a whole tangent about diets and playful complaints at the fact that spicy food grew harder to stomach the older you got.
But knowing that there were still those moments of levity calmed any remaining nerves lingering in the pit of your stomach. Because as different as things were, there was still a glimpse of the Ashton you fell in love with and it made you hopeful that things might be different this time.
Ashton opened his mouth to respond, words on the tip of his tongue, but before he could speak, a soft voice popped through the bubble you’d spent most of the night in.
“Sorry,” she began, politely apologetic. “Just wanted to check in. We’re closing the kitchen so, if you’d like anything else, now is the time. And if not, I’ve got the check.”
The pair of you blinked, both surprised at the time as you spared a glance around the now empty restaurant, before you grimaced apologetically. “Sorry,” Ashton laughed, “didn’t realize how late it was. We’re good.”
“Yeah, we’ll get out of here so you guys can close. Sorry,” you repeated, following suit as Ashton stood from his seat and took the bill.
In a matter of moments, you were standing outside the restaurant, glancing back as the staff turned the sign and began closing up. It reminded you of the past, of nights when you’d close down restaurants just to spend a few extra hours together after he returned from the road, and you couldn’t help but laugh as you headed for the parking lot.
“Guess some things don’t change.” He grinned, eyes bright and glittering in the city lights as he drifted closer to you. His hand bumped yours, body bleeding warmth as tipped his head to glance at you.
“Can’t believe we spent all night sitting there.” It was a quiet observation, whispered into the wind as you wandered slowly down the sidewalk. “Felt like no time at all.”
“It was always like that with us,” he reminded you - as if you’d somehow forgotten just how easy things were for most of your relationship. “Even at the end, we could talk forever and not get tired of one another.”
“I think the accent helped back then.” Ashton rolled his eyes fondly, laughing as his hand brushed yours once more, while you ducked your head. “You’ve always been easy to talk to. You’re kinda captivating, Ash.”
It was true. Ashton had always captured your attention wholly. His voice, warm and honeyed; his way with words, always so thoughtful and intriguing; his general demeanor, easy and bright - everything about him made you want to lose yourself in him and you continued to be reminded of why you’d loved him so fiercely for so long.
“You’re one to talk, sweetheart.”
There was little you could say in response, little your brain seemed to process, so you opted for the next best thing. After a moment’s hesitation, you took Ashton’s hand in your own and laced your fingers together. From the corner of your eye, you saw his grin grow wider - beaming, even in the dim moonlight - and smiled as you drew closer to the car.
The night was coming to an end, as sad as that made you, but you could see more nights like it in your future.
Conversation tapered off into comfortable silence then, neither of you compelled to speak just for the sake of it, and it was yet another reminder of what you’d missed. Things with Ashton had always held a level of ease that no one else had compared to and it was comforting to revel in the quiet, even as you climbed into the car and an old rock song began to play.
As Ashton tapped his fingers along to the song on the radio, you took the opportunity to study him. He sat bathed in the warm glow of streetlights, side profile exactly as you remembered it. There were a few minute changes - his hair had grown a little longer, facial hair covered cheeks that had grown a bit fuller - but you were reminded of why you’d always fawned over him.
There was something magnetic about him, something bright and beautiful that drew you in and kept you tethered in his orbit. He’d always been beautiful, both physically and mentally, and you were grateful for the chance to reconnect.
However, all too soon, you found yourselves parked in the lot of your building and heading up the sidewalk to your door.
“This was nice,” you conceded, smiling as you lingered near your front door. “I missed this.” With only a split second of consideration, brain working on overdrive to rid itself of any doubt, you admitted, “I missed you.”
Ashton, whose cheeks tinted pink beneath the scruff of his facial hair in a way that made your chest ache pleasantly, smiled brightly as he nodded. “I missed you, too.” His agreement was easy, ready, as he took a tentative step closer. “I’m really glad you said yes to tonight. I was afraid you wouldn’t.”
“I never considered anything other than yes.” There’d been no real thought, no other answer you could’ve given him. Though your relationship ended way back when, Ashton had always been the one that got away. Getting a second chance was more than you could’ve asked for. “I’m really glad we bumped into each other.”
It was a moment of serendipity, a coincidence that hadn’t occurred in the years you’d spent apart, and you knew Ashton was just as happy for the chance as he nodded his agreement.
Another step closer, another smile, as Ashton seemed to weigh his words. “I didn’t know if we’d see each other again,” he admitted, voice quiet as he closed the distance between you. “I always wanted to, always thought about reaching out, but I was afraid. I’m glad the universe made the decision for us.”
Ashton lifted his hand, soft and warm as it pressed to your cheek, and leaned in to press a soft kiss to your lips. “I want to do this right this time,” he declared, voice soft and washing over you as your eyes fluttered. “I don’t want to rush and fuck it all up again.”
“No one fucked it up last time,” you reminded him, tone matching his as you gripped his bicep softly. “It was just the wrong time. Things are different now, though.”
“Second time’s the charm.” His easy agreement was all you needed to close the small space between you once more, returning your lips to his in another soft kiss.
The second chance was what you both needed, another shot at a love you’d missed so dearly, and you were glad to have gotten it. No matter what happened, you were hopeful that this time, the second time would be the charm.
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Author's Note: I dunno, man. I'm just writing while my brain will let me.
Okay, I know you have no idea who I am (no duh, but I stay anonymous for personal reasons), but I will forever know you as the person that wrote the Ashton fic that both broke my heart and helped me. The one about loosing your dad after having an bad relationship. I get it for the most part (I didn't have the opportunity to fully cut him off, but had he been alive today we wouldn't be in contact). My dad was either emotionally absent or emotionally abusive and there were so many complicated emotions when he died. I was sad, I was pissed off, and I actually felt glad for a bit. That fic actually helped me to realize some things about myself and my relationship with my father, it was something I just needed to hear.
So thank you, from one Ashton girl to another.
P.S. Things will get better, even though it doesn't feel like it
I’m both sorry and glad it was helpful. I hate that it’s an experience we share but it’s nice to know that someone else gets it. It’s almost been a month (which is kind of insane) and still lots of weird feelings but it is what it is. I appreciate this, though. Sending good vibes!
Okay, I've had a little time to reflect and think about the show last night so here are my thoughts about my first 5sos show experience! :) This is super sappy and stupid so feel free to ignore it. I just was hit with a wave of nostalgia and figured you guys would be the best people to understand.
First of all, I think this experience was kind of... healing? Cathartic? That sounds so weird to say but I didn't really have the chance to do a lot of stuff as a teenager. I saw so many kids with their parents (and even people my age with their parents who have been going to shows this whole time) so it was so nice to see everyone together, just enjoying the moment. Seeing them love 5sos as a family was so nice.
It was also so nice to hear music that meant so much to me as an 18/19/20 year old live. I don't listen to 5sos as much anymore but, man, they got me through some tough times. Listening to them and being a fan and building this community was such a massive thing for me. They made me feel less lonely. They made masters program bearable. They made things so much better for me and hearing music that was the soundtrack of such a pivotal point in my life live for the first time was an experience I'll never forget.
Seeing fans with one another, chatting about how important this band has been to them, was such an amazing experience. Seeing the guys was so wonderful. Being in the presence of all these people who love them reminded me of why this fandom was a safe space for me for so long.
I was reminded of all the fun I had, of the joy I experienced, and it was just so nice to forget about my anxieties and my adult bullshit for just a few minutes and feel like a twenty-something who had nothing to do but love a band.
Being a part of the jokes and the laughter and the cheering and the chanting for Pizza was so fun. And I absolutely was reminded of why I crushed on Ash and Cal for so long (my boys; still have a bit of a crush on them, it's fine).
Second, the show itself was so wonderful. The bits were so funny, the guys sounded amazing, the blending of songs was so nice. It was hot as hell but I enjoyed every single moment.
It was everything I could've hoped for and I'm so grateful I finally got to experience it.
If anyone reads this, thanks for being here. It's been cool.
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