The Way I See It @mostbeautifulfeathers - Tumblr Blog

PTSD

The worst was over Or so I thought I made it home from the war In one piece Or so I thought I'm ready to get back to normal I'm ready to smile again I'm ready to laugh again I'm ready to love again Or so I thought I question every motive Why are you making me smile Why are you making me laugh Why do you love me What do you want from me What do you want to take from me When will you leave because they always do The worst isn't over The worst is just beginning The freezing up The paranoia Shutting down Because in your eyes, everyone is tainted & Nothing seems genuine

New Way

I don’t get it I don’t understand it This new foolishness going around Lemme see if I can break this down

I can’t hit you up first And I have to make sure my text is rehearsed I can’t say too much or act excited because then you’ll know you got it

Bring up trivial matters That don’t even matter A half ass conversation about Our distant generation

#1 rule is never show you care or catch feelings Yet we are all looking for something with meaning

To act as disinterested as you Would only push you further away So what game do I play?

Someone explain this new way Can someone break it down Because apparently if you play You’ll find someone who stays around.

#games #love #relationships #dating

Forbidden Fruit

I try to get out of bed as quietly as I can without waking him. I grab his blue Ralph Lauren button down to cover myself because it was a little chilly in his apartment. I walk to the kitchen to get some juice and can’t help but think how happy I feel at this very moment. It feels like everything makes sense in the world. Finally, I know what bliss feels like. I finish up my pineapple juice and put the cup in the sink. I try to tip toe back to the bedroom and slip into bed so I won’t wake him. When I lay down & try to go back to sleep, he slips his arm around me and kisses my neck. My heart starts racing a mile a minute. His presence alone gives me goosebumps. I turn around to face him and he just stares at me. “How can you look this beautiful in the morning?” He asks “Stop lying.” I blushed. “Nah, seriously, it’s crazy.” He says

I move a lock from his face and he smiles. Once again my heart just flutters and can’t help but cheese myself. He brings his face close to mine & I try to stop him. “I have morning breath, man.” I say while covering my mouth. He pulls my face to his & kisses me so passionately, I feel tingles all over my body. After we kiss I just on on him while he plays with my hair. We talk about a little bit of everything. How we want to change the world. Who is the best rapper out right now. Who is better, LeBron or Kobe? After our passionate debates, we just lay in the silence. It was the most calm I’ve ever felt. Even with the sirens going off in the background, the dogs barking and the children playing in the park, I felt like we were the only people in the world. For a moment, time stood still. As I drifted off into sleep while he played with my hair that’s when I opened my eyes. I realized I was alone in my bed. Not only was it time for me to get ready for work that this will never happen.

90skindofworld

Love Jones (1997)

90skindofworld

I loved Ms Gerri

90shiphopraprnb

fonzworthcutlass

long live Good Burger

7

It had been seven months since Evelyn and Rashaad had broken up. In those seven months, she has gone through 3 different hairstyles, 3 different jobs and 3 different guys. She had been a mess. Evelyn was at her desk at work thinking about how these seven months have been a rollercoaster ride. One minute she couldn’t have been more sure that letting Rashaad go was the best thing. Next minute she wanted to call him and say she would be whatever he wanted. But deep down she knew that Rashaad was bad for her. The line in Tamia’s song “Me” explains its perfectly, “…Loving you and loving me just don’t seem to work at all.” He was the worst kind of drug. The one that makes you think you can’t live without it. The one that makes you believe that only using it would make you happy. That was Rashaad. As happy as she thought she was, people could see that this love was not only affecting her emotionally but physically too. Now that it was over, Evelyn could see how it affected her so negatively. Especially when she looked back and saw the progress she has made. She gained her weight back. She was at a better job. She was focusing on her. Evelyn was heading back to school next fall. She was on the right track. Evelyn could see that if she stood with Rashaad, she wouldn’t be where she was today. She would still be worried about pleasing him, making sure he was happy and leaving herself for last. Evelyn would still be working at the job she hated. Worst of all she probably would have ended up pregnant by someone who wasn’t willing to be around when things got tough. Evelyn knew that if that would have happened, she would have resented herself and that child. Deep down inside she knew that this was the best thing. Even though it took seven months, she finally reached that finally stage of grief: Acceptance.

#acceptance #strength #love

Sunrise

Ashlee walked along the beach in a drunken stupor with her heels in hand. As she felt the sand between her toes, she was wondering how she even got here. It was 5 o’clock in the morning and here she was all in her feelings. Ashlee was wearing a sexy black dress that complimented her curves and her make-up was flawless. She had just come from the club with Alani and Chandler. Ashlee enjoyed herself. The music was great; she did not sit down the whole night. She had some drinks before she got to the club and had two margaritas when she arrived at the club. She was feeling nice and having a good time. Ashlee was getting tired and was no longer interested in the club so she said bye to her friends and left the club. She wasn’t interested in going home with any guy and to be honest, she just wanted to be alone.

Ashlee finally found a spot on the beach to sit and relax. She didn’t care about getting sand all over her. She just wanted to relax at the beach and enjoy this sunrise. Ashlee had been going out and trying to keep herself busy because this past year has been quite tough. She just lost herself completely and it was interesting finding herself all over again. It has been painful too. There have been nights when she could not sleep. There have been days when she would lose focus and just take a trip down memory lane. Overall, she was finding herself. She was on the road to becoming a better and stronger person; there are days when it is not as easy but she gets through it. On those difficult days, especially those nights when she can’t sleep, Ashlee likes to come to the beach and watch the sunrise. The sunrise was like a restart button. No matter what happened the day before that sunrise erased all of that. It was a new beginning. As she was pondering, all she heard were the ocean waves crashing into each other. It helped her realized that the world keeps spinning, everything keeps going and you just have to adapt. You have to keep going. Things happen and things change. Life goes on and so do we. She had come too far to give up now. Ashlee had to keep going.

#innerstrength #perseverance

90skindofworld

Lauryn Hill “Doo Wop (That Thing)”

mostbeautifulfeathers

🙏🏾

killedmesoftly

mellowmike

Black Tumblr reblog the fck out of this

90skindofworld

“Excuse me…cause you don’t have a ring either. So I suggest you watch your mouth, and stop trying to act like you better than everybody else before I put a ring around your damn eye”

Sheneneh (via 90skindofworld)