motheyesofnight

not a talker

[motheyesofnight]

(from "the flaming stillness")

time flows like water

mother died one day

nights go deeper and deeper

when night comes, every past

and future death comes

along with darkness

and silence

no longer human 'cause

couldn't save the cat while

drifting under the scorching sun

though a boat trapped in hell of stillness

isn't allowed to have a heart,

being soaked in the sea of oblivion

caused committing an indelible sin

tears of the unqualified

are just like

sounds

everything 

is just

like cavity

and regret

[motheyesofnight]

(from "White Nights")

The sun stripped away all darkness,

and I lost my language

No bees live in the white forest

The sun there is too bright, too violent

Now the only language left to me is that of others

My mouth yields only bitter, unripe tastes

I am weak enough

to deserve contempt

I have no hunger—

my nerves are always drawn too tightly

[motheyesofnight]

(from "the red rooms")

in front of my house,

there is a street lined with red rooms

out there are the prurient

with lewd hearts

devils are ceaselessly thrashing within them,

mistaking sordid selfishness for wisdom.

[motheyesofnight]

(from "fragments of ennui")

grains of white dust, stickily settled on the void

floundering flies, trapped in the air

red bones and damp wet soil

the black nail, cursing its own death

yellow lumps of fat, morbidly

poured into the drain

the caprice of flies and the malice of spiders

the only things that smile at us

in the void on the blade

the power of anxiety, a deadly greed that melts

the brain, among them, what blue anxiety

likes the most, air and resistance

admiration and contempt, something like love and hate,

something like the foolish youthful heart

toward a beast living only on instinct

ideas and trivial jokes

reality, illusions, delusions, ideals

compassion, denial, turning away, darkness

regret, death, loss, past, faith, distrust, doubt

an empty black mouth like the whitened

cloudy eyes of a turtle

Fire, sea, fall.

the sea, always the abject of fear

not even a handful of void

did the sea allow

[motheyesofnight]

(from "the most stale and old value")

what people are passionate about

is the most stale and old value

now the absolute truth left for them

is only what they hate the most

a swarm of infested maggots

over the rotting bodies

over their unpleasantly cold bodies

because

their deaths would be most immoral

[motheyesofnight]

(from "a cave")

a cave

with lively bats

those covetous eyes

fat sly claws

greenish bellies

full of sour old pride

vice

or stupidity

the only knife

that can be embedded in their hearts

[motheyesofnight]

(from "it was an act of death")

I was in the house

I stayed there

embracing death wasn't only beautiful

'cause it was so hot and my

whole body was shaking

everything suddenly became strange

something was rotting in the stomach

into the mouth

something kept flowing

it was an act of death

death, covered with foolish vice

that was firmly clutching a miserable-shaped apple

I was death

life no longer existed

[motheyesofnight]

(from "The Age of Peace")

As they pulled out her elbow,

indulgence flared up with heat

As the roar died down,

fear seeped into the void

Above it stretched humility with shallow roots

As they broke his knee,

arrogance was sucked

deep into the ground with pus

As the fury subsided,

shame crept into the void

Below it grew a leech as tenacious as tar,

gripping the earth with

a heavy and heavy

and obsessive hold

The suspicious limp swaying of the arms,

the pathetic dawdling of the legs,

no longer carried the plague

The world still looked strange,

but at last it was at peace.

[motheyesofnight]

(from "When Spring Came, the Teacup Broke")

When spring came,

the teacup broke

Tears welled up

in the wind

The wind blew

and silence fell

And the world is always

a bright day

without

shadows

Blind faith

blights us

so the face disapproved

of my death

In my last moments,

the back gradually became distant

The face

wasn't seen

The other

face was also

When spring came,

the teacup broke

Silence, wind, solitude,

nothing allowed.

[motheyesofnight]

(from "My Longest Fear")

There were petals on the road

There were fallen leaves also

Stepping on them

I kept walking

Sometimes in the rain

Sometimes in the snow

I kept walking

One day

I turned around

There was nothing

I might keep walking

Again, turned my head around

And everything was a muddy mess

My longest fear is

The brightest light for me

The deepest darkness in me

So I walked again

But couldn't move on

[motheyesofnight]

(from "my secret place")

in my most secret place

there's an ugly secret hidden so my eyes

had always glistened, but now the whole earth

collapsed, the atmosphere frozen,

bodies that unsightly entangled rolling

over the frozen wasteland, and my eyes

no more glisten and my ugly secret

is no longer a secret and my most

secret place lost its meaning.

[motheyesofnight]

(from "the breathing")

shadows waving in layers

beneath the blue lights

were blackened

and the silence

with a deafening symphony

was frozen

only the breathing

breaks the ice of silence

like a cry of a bird

glimmering deeply and unstably

in this huge world

I am left alone

I am left alone.

the cold silence

the desolate darkness

the breathing piercing the air

in that suffocating swell

I am left alone

I am left alone.

sinking is

not a bad thing

[motheyesofnight]

(from "The Attack of the Spiders")

   feathery, so painful time

   and the neglected death, they mixed

   their bodies up with full of excite-

   ment and plug the cavity

   now what we have left

   are the spider traps shining beautif-

   ully and the ever-festering toes;

   and then the empty scales trapped in the repeat signs

[motheyesofnight]

(from "normal people")

who don't know how to close eyes

and to play dumb in front of injustice,

who don't talk about greed, but justice,

who disclose the unreasonable matters

that have no bearing on their own comfort,

who are not useful to themselves, above all,

who recoginize the slightest hint of their stupidity,

they never forgive those at all.

[motheyesofnight]

(from "Social Animals")

What's the most depressing is

To hear hopeful words

From their feigned concern;

If they don't see with their own eyes

They never believe or even

Imagine something in you

And if you hurry to dance

To their tune to shut their mouths

They eventually fail to contain

Their sincerity, just burst into a laugh.

[motheyesofnight]

(from 'a wilderness')

in the middle of the world's darkest and most solitary wilderness,

I am just standing still alone.

I cannot sink down.

I have to keep looking

for the light, which is invisible.

as the frigid wind blows,

I tore all the clothes

I was wearing to shreds.

I couldn't get over it without shivering

and feeling the cold more

and more severely.

[motheyesofnight]

(from "An Intruder")

but it is the process that leads the direction of the result

the choice of words cannot tell everything and the delusion

that you're holding something in your hands makes you most vulgar.