An open letter to jughead jones
@jugheqdjones Please do not come back to our home ever again, please. If you want to be friends with Cheryl, fine. However don’t ever come back to Thornhill. You’re not welcome here. - Penelope G. Blossom
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@mrs-blossom
An open letter to jughead jones
@jugheqdjones Please do not come back to our home ever again, please. If you want to be friends with Cheryl, fine. However don’t ever come back to Thornhill. You’re not welcome here. - Penelope G. Blossom
We’ve heard there’s a wild goat rampant in the town. Don’t worry Riverdale, we’ll catch this goat and get him off the street. - Staff of Riverdale Animal Control.
Thank you for your help. I will pay you well for this.
@riverdaleanimalcontrol please take care of a wild goat named @daddysaltandpepper. He’s terrorizing the people of riverdale. I’ll pay you well if you comply.
I'm calling animal control
@daddysaltandpepper this is the only way to handle you, clearly.
Fuck off.
I’m living with a responsible almost-adult, you can’t take me away.
You mean that Jones kid? Thank you for helping Animal Control find you sooner, Mr. Keller. Hope you enjoy the local branch's kennel.
I'm calling animal control
@daddysaltandpepper this is the only way to handle you, clearly.
@doiley-files How do I delete someone’s post?
mom, if i knew, i probably would have deleted all of mr. keller’s posts by now …
I would report him to the Mayor, but he’s already been fired and there’s nothing to be done. Maybe I’ll write a letter to the justice’s office.
APPARENTLY, none of you NUNS know what a joke is.
I’m having charges brought against you
For???
HARRASMENT
You harass me everyday with these crappy ‘uwu’ hipster posts about drinking 10 gallons of earths cum everyday. I honestly should bring charges against you.
Dear God - Keller, what the hell are you doing?? No one who associates with the Blossoms should be posting this. Please delete this before I sue you.
I… am… a… GOAT. You cannot sue a damn goat. And even if I were human, free speech is my right and I won’t delete something just because it upsets you personally.
Do you really think you're a goat?? Jesus Keller, maybe you should hold back on the vodka. But if you are a goat - then what's stopping me from calling animal control?
I dont know what kind of slang a goat is, but this doesnt put him above the law.
umm I’m pretty sure it does
I don’t thing it does, Keller. I’ll be contacting Mayor McCoy myself. This behavior is horrid and the Blossom family is cutting all ties from you and your family.
@doiley-files How do I delete someone’s post?
mom, if i knew, i probably would have deleted all of mr. keller’s posts by now …
I would report him to the Mayor, but he’s already been fired and there’s nothing to be done. Maybe I’ll write a letter to the justice’s office.
APPARENTLY, none of you NUNS know what a joke is.
I’m having charges brought against you
For???
HARRASMENT
You harass me everyday with these crappy ‘uwu’ hipster posts about drinking 10 gallons of earths cum everyday. I honestly should bring charges against you.
Dear God - Keller, what the hell are you doing?? No one who associates with the Blossoms should be posting this. Please delete this before I sue you.
@sweetsisterpolly you had sexual intercourse with a piece of southside garbage while pregnant with my grandchildren. That’s disgusting and proof you’re an unfit mother. I will be contacting the mayor, sheriff, and child services.
Hello, Coopers.
@sweetsisterpolly @bettyc0oper @chiccmagnet @alicecooperofficial Hello, dreaded Coopers. It’s I - Penelope Blossom. I’ve heard you’ve been smearing my deceased sons name & to a lesser extent harassing Cheryl as well. How dare you attack my children (one of which who’s dead) like this. I’m am beyond angry and will file a complaint with the Mayor & Sheriff.
With all due respects Mrs. Blossom,
Shut up.
How dare you speak to me that way, young man. That is disgusting behavior and just proves your mother did a terrible job raising you all.
@possiblyjasonblossom However you are - how dare you pretend to be my dead son on the internet! This is disgusting & will not be tolerated by me. @chrryb0mbshell shame on you Cheryl for allowing this imposter to interact with others as Jason. We will talk about a proper punishment for this later.
Hello, Coopers.
@sweetsisterpolly @bettyc0oper @chiccmagnet @alicecooperofficial Hello, dreaded Coopers. It’s I - Penelope Blossom. I’ve heard you’ve been smearing my deceased sons name & to a lesser extent harassing Cheryl as well. How dare you attack my children (one of which who’s dead) like this. I’m am beyond angry and will file a complaint with the Mayor & Sheriff.
@sweetsisterpolly Oh Look - If it isn’t Polly Cooper back from the hospital. Does your mother know you’re out? I know how much she loves to keep her ‘image’ in tact. You haven’t done drugs while bearing my grandchild right? Because if you have - God help you.
Hello Mrs. Blossom, yes my mother knows I’m out and my baby and I both safe and well. UWU
I wouldn’t even think of taking any drugs!
Nonetheless - I’d like to inspect your current living arrangements and test you for drugs. Just to make sure my grandchild will be safe - it is part Blossom after all.
@sweetsisterpolly Oh Look - If it isn’t Polly Cooper back from the hospital. Does your mother know you’re out? I know how much she loves to keep her ‘image’ in tact. You haven’t done drugs while bearing my grandchild right? Because if you have - God help you.
@chrryb0mbshell Cheryl - I pray you haven't been disrespecting our family name on this site. God knows you're already a dissapointment as it is.
I've heard everyone (including my children) have tumblrs. So naturally being a Blossom - I now have one too. Signed - Penelope M. Blossom.