Okay. One. One more unhinged rant. For the day at least
One of the most common criticisms of Solavellan I see is Solas sees Lavellan as a "not like other girls" type. While I sort of understand how someone could get this idea given Solas' reputation in the fandom, this interpretation entirely relies on fanon
That fanon is not built on nothing though, because Solas himself entertains this at one point during the romance. In the second scene, during the kiss on the balcony, he asks both a romanced (and unromanced!) Inquisitor if the existence of the anchor has changed them in how they act. Solas is still at this point convincing himself that all the people in this world are fake and he is doing them all a favor in his ultimate plan, but when the Inquisitor confirms that no, they weren't any different before the anchor. Solas has to come to terms with that, and it is the first step into him going: Shit, I think this world has merit
The entire point of BOTH Solas' romance and friendship path is that the Inquisitor is not special and if Solas faces that it means he's dooming a world full of people just as rich as them to death to restore an already dead world, and that thought scares him so badly he runs
In the grove scene, where Solas leaves Lavellan, you can find people saying he does that because he realized just how in love he was with Lavellan and he panicked and ran. He's good at that. But what I don't see discussed as often is the broader why to that response
Patrick Weekes confirmed that Solas didn't bring Lavellan into the grove to tell them about the Vallaslin. He was going to tell them he was the Dread Wolf and what his plan was, but at the final moment he chickens out, and tells them about the Vallaslin instead (Solas' greatest modern flaw is not pride, it is cowardice, but that is an unhinged rant for another day)
And then after it hit him what he was about to do, how he was going to give it up all for them, and again here comes that pesky "Lavellan is not special" realization he's been struggling with. Because if he could give it up for Lavellan, if they were worth it, then that means there could be a thousand, a million more like them in the world. A million more that are worth it, and what could be worse for him than that?
My final piece of evidence is this: Cole says this straight up in a post-breakup banter with Solas
Conclusion: Solas is a deeply flawed person, often insufferable and I will always roast him but he is well written and occasionally the misunderstanding of his character by the fandom irritates me :)