diego.
***
Diego listened to her words, knowing that she believed in him more than anyone but no matter how much work he did, he couldn’t help but be nervous about another leap. He had thought through so much, been so careful and now that he was ready, he was afraid that he wasn’t ready. His therapist had told him that if he waited until the perfect time, he’d be waiting forever. “You ever get tired of giving me pep talks?” He let out a soft laugh before he threw his arm around her shoulders and pressed a kiss to the side of her head. “I appreciate that. I feel like a failure a lot, if I’m being honest. But I’m…fuck I want to get past that. All this self pity is..exhausting,” he joked but he really was trying his best. He just knew he had to be okay even if he was the only one he saw it. He was trying hard to unwind himself and unlearn how to care so much about others perspectives. And he needed to do that before he put himself in the spotlight again. “It’s just…wild out there, you know? And everyone here plays dirty. Probably gonna be worse statewide too. I don’t know I’m,” he took in a deep breath and shrugged. “I guess I’m just scared of things changing. Things are good right now, you know? For me, I mean, personally. The world is shit but I got my place, Marina and I are good, you and Damon and Franco are safe. I just dont want to rock the boat.”
“No.” Jane shook her head, as she knew that everyone needed that one person who’d be rooting for them through thick and thin. Jane was lucky enough to have both Damon and Diego be those people for her, and she’d always be that person for them. “But you can make up for it with some of that Diego Cruz cooking.” She teased him, although she was very much a fan of what the man threw down in the kitchen. “But you’re not a failure, Diego. Do you not see what you’ve done for this town? Seriously? A “failure” wouldn’t have been able to accomplish half of the things you have.” Jane let him know. “I can imagine.” She told him, as he spoke on how his self pity was exhausting. She understood that Diego was hard on himself, but he was being hard on himself to the point that it was become a detriment to himself and all he could do. “But that’s why you’re needed. To help reign in some of that craziness, but—” Jane said, biting down on her lip. “I want you to throw yourself back into it all, if you can take it. If you can understand that not everyone’s going to adore you and that yes, people are going to let their criticisms be known. But those negatives can not rule out all the positives in what you do, okay.” Jane told her best friend, as this was something he needed to hear. Diego was so quick to hear the negatives, but there was so many positives all around him. She wanted to listen to that. “Yeah, they are pretty okay, right now. But they can be better, we both know they can be. So if making things better means rocking the boat, let’s rock it. Because we aren’t people who simply accept, we strive for more.”













