shae

[absurdityof]

“I felt very sad so I sat down. I felt so sad that I rested my head on my own knees and smoothed my own head. I felt so sad I couldn’t imagine feeling any other way again. I said, I don’t like this. I don’t want to do this anymore. And I went back to lying in bed, just before the doorbell rang.”

— Jamaica Kincaid, from “What Have I Been Doing Lately,” At the Bottom of the River (via lifeinpoetry)

[paper-wounds]

[thisandthatandeverythinginbtween]

This.

[alanreedwrite]

“Daylight was a terrible confession, it was like admitting you were going to die one day at the exact location of your body.”

– Aurora Mattia, The Fifth Wound

[mrsxrager]

sunset

[undinesea]

Photo by Linda Lomelino

[mrsxrager]

in process

[wovi]

*

plath

[mrsxrager]

beach baby collecting her beach rocks

[mrsxrager]

I’m getting sad again

I feel pain in my hands when I think of you

I know you’re hurting because I can no longer hold my coffee in the mornings

My fingers shake when I brush my hair

I have ideas of words I could write into poems but my knuckles ache at the thought

I feel pain in my hands when I think of you

they can’t reach, they can’t hold, they can’t fix

They can’t protect

I’m getting sad again

[mrsxrager]

I wish the mirrors arms were warmer when it holds me

I wish the way you looked at me when I begged for you from my knees didn’t sit still in the creases of my laugh lines

You hated me and it lived to become the paradigm of what I deserved

You hated me and I wore it like the winter coat I trusted to keep me warm

You hated me and it felt better than nothing at all

It was everything

I have heard that your inner voice is the echo of your mother

But she hated me too

I built my home inside of a voice

it’s a low roar that’s still shaking me

like love is a bad dream it wants to wake me from

like love is something meant for other people but not for me

[mrsxrager]

just right there

[dearorpheus]

[...] — I tell myself but Louise you are not going to kill yourself it is not necessary, you are strong enough now to push suicide away – this thought makes me snap out of a nightmare. I am convinced but Louise you don’t owe anything to anyone You no longer have debts, you do not have debts – You can close the door and chase claims from your conscience; You made yourself a victim of your own masochism; You want to expiate crimes that do not exist – You do not have to die for Anyone – This realization is a revelation

— Louise Bourgeois

[theoptia]

Friedrich Nietzsche, from Selected Letters of Friedrich Nietzsche

[mrsxrager]

the silence only eats you for a while

the silence only fuels the fire

[mrsxrager]

whatever

[mrsxrager]

it’s like hearing the echo of everyone who has ever left me

but it has no end

[mrsxrager]

I have never begged God for a Tuesday