Musings of a Perpetual Daydreamer

Mariam That awkward weird kid that spent way too much time daydreaming and talking to themselves. Some things never change✨

[happymiffy]

[sealdeer]

another poster. all eyes on rafah, we stand with the people of palestine

[herotox]

[tunameltd0wn]

[id: a photo of a bison leaping over a small stream in the middle of a prairie field. it’s surround by green grasses and tall yellow flowers. part of another bison is visible ahead of the leaping bison. /end id]

[1-800-horrorfilms]

i think "it takes a village" shouldn't be just "to raise a child". we should understand it takes a village to do literally everything we do. all day every day. without our communities we would not have drinking water or electricity or clean streets or food or shelter or anything. we cannot do any thing alone. we just can't. and with that comes the fact that you are not alone. you already have a community, seek to be an active part of it, you will feel better. reach out and thank them, they're happy to have you too. i promise. it takes a village to live.

[vangoghcore]

by benjaminwolf__

[frrosty]

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‏‏‎ ‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎"i love you, it's ruining my life."

[musingsofaperpetualdaydreamer]

I’ve seen some posts regarding the length of the album. This is just my take. With her re-recording her past albums, all the events in personal life the deeply hurtful events we know of and those we don’t, having to go back and relive it all while processing things, while being on a very public stage is a lot. You ever clean your room out and find yourself wearing and going through old stuff, some you might not be attached to anymore but it just gives you pause? Like you just linger on holding onto stuff and it takes you back. Well writing has always been cathartic for her. She puts her feelings into her songs. So I’m not surprised the album turned into an anthology that was that long. Do you ever just start writing and find it just starts pouring out of you? Not only is she human but she’s incredibly gifted. I think this album feels very much like diary pages she’s bound together with sticky notes, coffee mug rings and all. Very Taylor in style. Not primarily for entertainment of the masses but an outlet, a collective body of work that stands for itself. It doesn’t need to be ‘sonically cohesive’, I feel it was more stream of consciousness kind of style. An outpouring of the heart of a ‘tortured poet’ as it were and the patchwork jaggedness is what makes it the body of art that it is. It’s vulnerable and messy but still artfully done in way that still leaves things open to mystery. The lines between fiction and reality blurred. It really is something that she still wishes to share her deepest feelings and share it for consumption in this form, knowing while yes it may be treasured by some, it will all be picked and torn apart. She captures this well on several songs on the album, notably How Did It End?. It’s one thing to face your own reflection after laying all your feelings bare, it’s another to then face an expectant crowd. Her bravery to put herself out there and keep trying is something I deeply admire.

[musingsofaperpetualdaydreamer]

I'm so depressed, I act like it's my birthday every day

I'm so obsessed with him, but he avoids me like the plague

I cry a lot, but I am so productive, it's an art

You know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart

[gulistan-blog]

㋡🥀

[musingsofaperpetualdaydreamer]

You know how to ball, I know Aristotle✨

[ai-dream]

[mindllessdreaming]

this whole album is literally “never take advice from someone who’s falling apart”

[musingsofaperpetualdaydreamer]

[musingsofaperpetualdaydreamer]

“And I’ll tell you that he runs because he loves me ‘cause you should’ve seen him when he first saw me”

“Once I fix him he’s gonna miss me.”

“Did you really beam me up in a cloud of sparkling dust Just to do experiments on?…for a moment I knew cosmic love”

“Every breath feels like rarest air, when you're not sure if he wants to be there”

“You shit-talked me under the table. Talkin' rings and talkin' cradles. I wish I could unrecall how we almost had it all”

“Dancing phantoms on the terrace are they second-hand embarrassed. That I can't get out of bed 'Cause something counterfeit's dead?”

“And I may never open up thе way I did for you. And all of those best laid plans. You said I needed a bravе man. Then proceeded to play him, Until I believed it too. And it kills me”

“Say it once again with feeling, How the death rattle breathing, Silenced as the soul was leaving, The deflation of our dreaming. Leaving me bereft and reeling. My beloved ghost and me, Sitting in a tree D-Y-I-N-G”

“I guess a lesser woman would've lost hope. A greater woman wouldn't beg. But I looked to the sky and said (Please)”

“But even statues crumble if they're made to wait. I'm so afraid I sealed my fate. No sign of soulmates. I'm just a paperweight in shades of greige. Spending my last coin so someone will tell me it'll be okay”

“One last souvenir from my trip to your shores. Now and then I reread the manuscript but the story isn't mine anymore”

“It feels like the time. She fell through the ice then came out alive”

“But you're the reason. And no one here's to blame but what about your quiet treason?”

“He was my best friend down at the sandlot. I felt more when we played pretend than with all the Kens. 'Cause he took me out of my box, stole my tortured heart, left all these broken parts. Told me I'm better off. But I'm not”

[terminusantequem]

Frank Holliday (American, b. 1957), Mirror, 2022. Oil on canvas, 24.0 × 20.0 in.

[musingsofaperpetualdaydreamer]

Did you really beam me up

In a cloud of sparkling dust

Just to do experiments on?

Tell me I was the chosen one

Showed me that this world is bigger than us

Then sent me back where I came from

Excuse me???

[musingsofaperpetualdaydreamer]

I get that we don’t know which parts of songs for definite are biographical and what’s fiction and sure not all of it is directly relatable or can be interpreted in different ways. I just found it fascinating listening to this album, when she would describe some of her experiences as though she were some alien or crazy for feeling a certain way but all I could keep chanting to myself through a lot of it was omg *one of us, one of us, one of us*. Even where I didn’t I’d think yeah that seems understandable actually. It felt so incredible to have someone encapsulate how you felt or an experience that feels parallel. I guess it’s true that when you’re going through something, when you’re in the thick of it, you feel completely isolated and like no one could possibly understand you. And through writing and sharing we find a cathartic relief that we aren’t so alone and through reclaiming our breath, we begin to allow ourselves to dare to believe that maybe everything will be alright.

[losewsswiftly]

long live all the mountains we moved ✨