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@mutinsfromthemoon
an au where the 2016 shane is sent to 2022 and 2022 shane is sent to 2016, a day after the tuna melt and now shane has to deal with a younger and heartbroken ilya rozanov and 2022 ilya rozanov have to deal with a 2016 shane that is still in denial about his sexuality and feelings
i find so funny that so many fics write shane as a nagging wife that would be so mad at ilya joking around and fighting on ice but shane would never be mad at Ilya for that. everything ilya does shane finds it so endearing. shane loves the hell of his russian man. the only thing that makes shane mad is jealousy and when ilya refuses to be open with him but other than that? nah shane loves every aspect of ilyaâs personality.
ok an au hollanov where ilyaâs house was broken into and he became paranoid with his security. then svetlana suggests he look into some self defense classes and then ilya decides to try jiu jitsu. and of course the instructor is hot as fuck and ilya just forgets why he went there. he just keeps asking to the instructor to repeat the moves again and again just to have the instructor all over him
âteach me againâ
âagain?â
âshane, i mean, hollander, you know my house was invaded, yes? i need extra helpâ
âwell, yes, i guessâ
shane coming with a fantasy: so youâre gonna edging me for hours and we will see how many times we can come
ilya coming with a fantasy: so iâm your wife and iâm making a dinner when you arrive from work very tired and then im gonna feed you and massaging you and kiss you senseless and then we gonna cuddle on sofa and i will be curled on your chest and you will be saying sweet nothings to me and we gonna say i love you to each other
ok so i have this headcanon that shaneâs actually super into hand working. and one time heâs in the locker room just kinda eavesdropping on the rookies, and theyâre talking about how hard it is to build a gaming PC with all those tiny pieces and cables and stuff. that immediately gets Shaneâs attention because that means spending hours working with small, delicate parts. so obviously he goes out, buys everything he needs, and then just locks in for like a day or two straight building the whole thing. And he actually has fun doing it? like, genuinely enjoys the process. next thing you know, heâs low-key thinking about making it a real hobby.
shane is known to have the bitchiest RBF in the league, and the only person he canât help but look with the loveliest expression is his husband and it doesnât matter where, the moment he looks at ilya rozanov he will have a gentle smile and heart eyes on his face. but as soon as he looks other way the rbf is back instantly and it makes some people feel bad if theyâre in the vicinity of that coldly expression.
âhow shane didnât notice all the sacrifices ilya made for himâ cus in shaneâs mind everything was ok BECAUSE ILYA ALWAYS SAID IT WAS OK. the box day fighting was shane blinded by ilya, he didnât know that the 10 years plan wasnât working out for ilya anymore. even galina said that ilya needed to communicate better with shane. and everything is worsened by ilyaâs depression and his refusal to be more open with shane. like, shane canât read minds. and even with ilya hiding his struggles, shane has noticed that ilya was not feeling well and every time shane tried to bring this up ilya shunned him so how is shane the only problem in TLG? and you guys are trying to convince me that the neurotic man that was planning all his life with ilya 3 in the morning wouldnât have made another plan? and if ilya hasnât asked him to come to the party on the day of the said party, shane wouldnât think about and even would went?. both of them are the problem in this book, but you guys are heavily putting all the blame in someone that couldnât do anything with the minimal information he had
the centaurs WAGs (or SAPs) added shane and ilya as a joke to the group chat and turns out to be the best thing ever to them and to ilya. ilya thrives in the middle of them, heâs spiritually a WAG. shane doesnât talk much - even in the cens group - he only see the messages that is directed to him. everything he needs to know his husband WILL tell him, very detailed. cus obviously ilya is having the time of his life, his nosy ass is now in everybody business. even in the players from another teams
i know all about the troy barrett slander that happened few weeks ago and still do sometimes, but i believe that troy and shane would be such good friends. they have too much in common to not bond. those two are like siblings from another womb. and i think ilya would joke like always that theyâre very bad at liking things that arenât hockey and they need to find a new hobby. then those two taking it seriously cus they want to prove that they can like things other than hockey and each other. and thereâs shane and troy trying every single thing they have time to do for a year until they find something that they genuinely enjoy doing either alone or together. and the rest of centaurs would definitely join them sometimes cus theyâre watching this closely hoping they get to be friends and find a hobby. and after shane and troy get close, the centaurs start to call them âthe twinsâ and joke âwhat the twins are going to do this week?â
laughing remembering a headcanon i saw somewhere dunno if was here or twitter but it was about rookies treating shane as one of them and calling ilya an unc and ilya hating it cus heâs younger than shane (a month) and shane enjoying every minute of it
i donât think shane get touchy when heâs drunk. tipsy shane is relaxed, drunk shane is very happy and loudly joking around utill he canât keep his eyes open and pass out in his chair. i think drunk shane is easily sleepy shane. ilya on the other hand is hundred percent extra touchy. if shane isnât holding him he whines about it and while heâs in his husband arms heâs definitely kissing any part of his face he can reach
OK AN AU where Ilya has been transferred from Boston to Ottawa to lead a new project at the recently opened Canada branch. he moved into an apartment in a neighbourhood that was suggested to him as being very tranquil, but this isn't the case at all. well, it is most of the time, but every week his neighbour seems to have a massive party and he and his friends are so loud late at night. he can never get hold of his neighbour to ask him to keep it down and he doesn't want to be the new annoying neighbour, so he tries not to complain yet. but that doesn't mean he can't complain to his friend Svetlana and his new awesome co workers.
the day after his neighbour's loud gathering, Ilya complains to Wyatt and Troy about it. "it's so loud, and sometimes when i can decipher what they're screaming, it's a lot of nonsense." as he tries to recall what people were screaming about in the other apartment, Wyatt becomes really quiet and apologises, saying that he and his friends are responsible for these gatherings. he then invites Ilya, saying, "you should come next week. i know you probably won't like it, it doesn't seem like your vibe, but Shane is always happy to have more people to play with us"
the following week, Ilya went to the apartment next door and was greeted by the prettiest man he had ever seen, with Wyatt right behind him. he then discovers that the pretty man is his neighbour and that the gatherings are actually a very heated RPG. Shane apologises for the noise and explains that the previous neighbour was an old lady with hearing problems, so they will be more careful in future. Ilya is now smitten with a very adorable nerd and role plays as a wizard every week just to be with Shane.
my hc is that ilya is more a clean freak than shane. ilya had to grow up really early after heâs mom died and his father is military so he was running that house like the navy. i bet heâs expected everything to be spotless. and even if ilya and shane started to living alone at the same time, shane always had both of his parents doing all the things they could for him. so i think shane likes things organized but he doesnât mind a little of a mess, ilya on the other hand like the things clean. and both of them agree with no shoes inside the house and no outside clothes on the bed. so no heteronormativity in this relationship, ilya is not a messy boy and shane is not a nagging wife. i think they just argue about the best way of organizing and cleaning the house.
i just know that shane and ilya walk around the city making random people and their friends believe that soulmates are real
thinking about how shane just gave back to ilya what he missed the most: a loving family. i just think that after a hard day at practice, he was going to drive to home, but he went to shane's parents house instead because he remembered that he has loving parents now. so he got there and was received with tight hugs and loud kisses on his cheeks, ate his favorite ice cream and took a nap in shane's childhood bedroom and after he woke up, he ate a delicious dinner that david told him it was a new recipe. then face call shane with yuna and david and went home with leftovers and feeling so much better.
hollanov au where is the worst day of shaneâs life. he has planed for a months to propose to his long time girlfriend in her favorite restaurant, just to her reject it and confess that she cheated on him and leave him stranded in the middle of the restaurant on his one knee with the ring box opened in his hand. he looked around and everyone is pitting on him. he just gets up, ask for the check, pays and leave, he doesnât even take the ring.
as the time goes by, heâs depressed and doesnât want to talk to anyone, until his friends pulls up to his apartment and call it an intervention. âyou need to leave this room, shaneâ says rose, one of his best friends. they take him to a bar saying he can drink his tears away. as he got drunk he goes to the bar to get some more beer, heâs tipsy, but not drunk enough. as he waits, a guy starts talking to him
âheâs so friendlyâ shane thinks, and then he starts to just blurting his heart out to the kind handsome stranger that is looking very interested in his story.
ââââââââ
as this very drunk pretty man goes venting to Ilya, he kinda of starting to realize something horrible âholy shitâ he thinks, ilya IS THE man that this guyâs girlfriend cheated on with. but if itâs true what that girl said, if this man is really gay, well, ilya can definitely work with that.
even if this pretty boy gets mad at ilya later, heâs gonna charm his way out of a fight. but this guy is definitely going home with ilya tonight, and maybe the night after that, and the night after, and why not a couple of months, years after?. he caused the problem, he will solve it.
thinking about how many man hit on shane on instagram after he came out to his team and was let on read cus mr i dont manage my own instagram never read his DMs and the only time he does read is to reply Ilya