Nathaniel aka SadBoiā¢ļø
Iām gonna take you on a journey so buckle up Candies I introduce to you my coffee induced extravaganza
(The author sends her sincere apologies for any grammar mistakes because of a simple fact that English is not her native language. Thank you)
To understand Nathaniel as a character and see why and how he became who he became we need to go back in time to the high school years.
Obviously the most important person that had any impact on who he is today was his father.
An abusive little shit who lost his position at work to someone younger and more talented then him. Probably saw his failures in Nathaniel. His son who was young, intelligent, talented and everything he will never even dream to be. His frustration and anger landed with a fierce hand on Nath. Literally.
What we need to understand is that Nathaniel was just a child. 18 or not he was still to young to go through such trauma.
Just take a moment and imagine coming home, everyday, knowing that your father will probably find any excuse to hurt you. You try to be quiet. You try your best just so maybe for this one day he will not rise his hand to hit you. You are afraid. Everyday, every moment, with every breath you anticipate that something is going to happen. Because it always does.
Whatās even worst he is alone but at the same time he is not. His mother sees everything. She does nothing.
He has a sister. Sheās treated well. Way better then him but he never knows, right? He will never be sure if he will be enough for his father. If there will come a day when his going to be so angry that maybe his body might not be enough. He might rise a hand on her too.
And in that situation when he canāt even be himself, when he needs to dance to his fathers music and thereās nobody to help him, he feels more alone then he will ever feel in his whole life.
So for his own safety he plays along. Still having hope that maybe one day his father will stop being abusive. That if he will be good enough dad will be happy. (Please remember the words āgood enoughā Iāll come back to them again)
And then he meets a girl. Sheās too good and naive. He doesnāt know what to think of her. And then he has a crush. And suddenly sheās the only good thing in his life.
Because sheās pure. And Nathaniel is sure she doesnāt know anything about his abusive father. And if not for the tattoo fiasco she would probably never learnt.
And she helps him out. And for the first time in his life he feels freaking safe. He knows there is someone who cares for him. Sheās everything to him. I will give proof about how important she was when we move to UL.
Heās happy. There are no bruises. And no shouting. In the flat there is only silence and he wouldnāt change it for anything. He loves this. And Candy is there with him. Through all of that.
And suddenly sheās gone.
Before we go into UL we need to discuss the time in between. So we know now that everyone who ever met him, or considered him as a friend turned their backs on him.
Kim: Surely because you werenāt here when he was āchangingā. But everyone turned their backs on him.
So we know now that when Candy left he was literally alone. No one even tried to understand what happened to him. No one asked him if he need help, or if everything is alright. They just⦠forgot about him. It was easier for them to stop talking to him and just leave him be. It was so fucking wrong to do that. They knew him form High School how could they think that he justā¦. ugh I canāt talk about this shit friends. You know the drill.
They just easily accepted his change and went with it. Assholes.
As we know itās been a few years and now the real fun can begin.
Sheās back. Obviously he knows he changed and now I will give a few examples to show why we should at least be nice to him. Why we canāt judge him so easily and say heās an asshole just because we donāt like his new characterisation.
On this note I need to tell you that his appearance and the way he lives heās life now is definitely justified by his past. Thatās why I think he is more realistic now then he was in high school.
First of all the first time we meet him (I couldnāt find any screenshots Iām angry but bare with me) the guys that mugged Candy are afraid of him. When they notice itās Nath they back off. We knew then that something is definitely wrong. And we were right unfortunately. His first appearance is intense. He is an asshole and I will admit that. Heās more cheeky and sarcastic. Of course we are shocked because we remember him differently.
After, our first time in the gym, we learn that he followed Candy to make sure she made it safe to the dorms. That was sweet of him. Tho I think he didnāt really wanted to share that. And he was probably angry at himself for doing that. But he just couldnāt leave her alone. So. I was saying one time that he is still grateful that she helped with his dad. That was the first time someone did something just for him. The first time someone cared so he still has a soft spot for her. And thatās all for now. Just a soft spot.
Iām not gonna discuss the situation with his one night stand. Obviously that was something he didnāt want her to see. Shit happened. He tried to be an idiot about it and said something that made Candy angry. BUT when he noticed sheās disappointed and hurt and angry he almost instantly said that heās sorry and he was a jerk. And this is first but one of many indications that he still cares for her.
He even says that he didnāt want her to see that. Itās different if she heard about it. Heās sure she did but he didnāt want her to see.
Later on he even lies to her tho we know the truth. One time we see him in the dorms and he says he was obviously looking for her. Which is a lie he was coming back from someoneās room this little cockroach. He lied because he didnāt want her to know. And heās a flirt. He likes the fact that Candy is denying him all the time.
This is a hard topic. Iām not saying that the girls are easy or something. They want to sleep with him and they do. Itās simple. Candy doesnāt want to so she says no, itās simple too.
He says he likes it that Candy says no. Heās too full of himself in that department.
And now the final problem. This last episode was full of information about Nath. About the past and about the present.
Warning! all of this right now are just theories.
So we didnāt had the opportunity to hear what Kim thinks the guys heās hanging out with are doing because that was the moment Nathaniel picked to make himself known.
But we do have an idea donāt we?
Personally I think heās a dealer. Hear me out.
In this game and the HS one we had a lot of hard topics. Lies, alcohol, abuse, Armin was arrested, Lys had an accident, there was cancer, dying dad and the bullying (might be even rape because Evan Iām sure you remember) so i would be not surprised if we touched the topic of drugs.
Nath: Just like that I needed to learn how to take care of things on my own. How to pay for everything, take care of my sister, and all the rest.
So I think that he lied to Candy about the money he has from his parents. I think his dad lost the job. He needed the money. And he needed them fast.
Cas: Oh, did I hit a soft spot? Everybody knows that where you can find junkies, you can find Nathā¦
So basically Cas confirms that heās selling drugs. I donāt think Castiel would say something like that if it wasnāt true. And after that Nathaniel gets angry. He didnāt want Candy to know. He picked the moment to go into the gym just before Kim could say anything. If he does this because of money or other reasons the fact stays the same. Nathaniel is probably selling drugs.
And itās so hard for him to accept any help even from Candy. Because he is independent. And he doesnāt need anybody. He takes care of everything and heās doing it alone. He managed to do that for many years even when she wasnāt here so this is an issue too.
Heās arc will be about getting help. Letting yourself to admit that you need help. About drugs and abuse. About angry issues because he is so full of rage.
Nath: And when you left after high school with your parentsā¦
That confirms that shit hit the fan for him when Candy left. Doesnāt that say a lot about his feelings for her? About what and who she is to him?
This boy is surprised that Candy cares for him. It hurts me to say that but he is shocked about somebody loving him. (Too dramatic? Might be)
He thought when she was back that she wouldnāt give a fuck about him because why? Nobody else, their own friends from high school didnāt so why should she?
This boy is so sad and alone and terrified and I justā¦
I only hope it will be worthwhile. Because these are some serious problems. Heās story will be the most interesting one.
Iām sorry if itās chaotic but fucking tumblr delated half of it three bloody times Iām so angry
(Iām just sorry for the girls that were his ex and picked someone else⦠he has a possessive streak now. He had it in high school so now itās probably worse. He will be so sad I canāt take this)