I do not regret my choice
I do not regret leaving the way that I did
Having to uphold this standard of yours that I would never be for a man who would never reach mine
But ultimately I can’t understand how we ended up together in the first place
You were never what I wanted, yet I accepted you and chose to grow with you
Maybe. It was just weakness.
To love and to be loved is all I desired and you were there.
Sad thing is, now I realize it was never close to being love to begin with.
I live in remorse to all the time and opportunities I wasted in attempts to please you. I regret letting you control me the way you did.
I regret not standing up for myself sooner in fear that your anger would once again get the best of you.
I lived with your betrayals convincing myself that you would change. It was impossible for me to tear down our castle over a strong wind.
Eventually, it would pass.
I don’t understand anymore
I don’t understand if I am wrong
If I will ever truly understand how to continue a healthy relationship in my future I’ve stopped trying.
As much as my heart wishes for companishionship my mind understands that she is not ready for the turmoils and the distractions that would arise up ahead the road of betrayal and control
She is not ready. I am not ready.
For maybe the scars you caused are deeper than I allow myself to realize but... maybe one day. I’ll be shown the way.
I hope you are happy. I hope you keep her safe.
She is a beautiful creature all within her own and she suits you better than I ever will.
We came from two different worlds and thought the beauty of us was mixed between our differences. It is not.
I’m glad you found her. She will give you everything I could not. Please be good to her and learn from the pain you wrecklessly put me through. Be careful to opening doors that will lead you to dark paths.