Disclaimer - this story explores dark, unhealthy relationship dynamics. it is not intended to reflect or promote real-life standards of love, respect, or consent. it also does not promote or glamorize sugar daddy/sugar baby relationships. please excuse any errors or misspelling. let me know of any missed warnings!!
Gold Tastes Bitter Masterpost
⋆༺𓆩☠︎︎𓆪༻⋆
You froze, rooted to the spot.
Of all the scenarios you’d run through in your head, you hadn’t expected him to show up here. Not now. Not like this. The air felt thin in your lungs as your gaze locked with his, for the first time since that night. Words refused to come.
“Can I come in?” His voice was low, measured, but there was a weight behind it that made your stomach twist.
Your lips parted, but all you could manage was a whisper. “I… I don’t know.”
A flicker of frustration crossed his features, softened almost instantly by something else. A sigh.
“Y/n,” he said gently, “we need to talk.”
You closed your eyes for a moment, willing your pulse to slow. He was right. You couldn’t avoid this forever, no matter how much it scared you. Drawing in a shaky breath, you stepped aside, the quietest surrender, and allowed him into your apartment.
You closed the door quietly, trailing after him but keeping several careful steps between you.
“You haven’t answered any of my texts.” He turned, his gaze heavy, searching yours.
You exhaled sharply, folding your arms across your chest like armor.
“That’s the second time you’ve done that,” he murmured, eyes flicking to the defensive gesture.
Your voice was flat, edged. “Do any of those rules even matter anymore?”
Silence followed. Thick, weighted, and impossible to ignore. Because you were right. Neither of you needed to say it out loud. Too many lines had been crossed, but the biggest one loomed between you, unspoken, threatening to shatter everything.
“They should.” His voice was low, steady, as he stepped closer. “I’m sorry. For overstepping. For crossing that boundary.”
The words caught you off guard. An apology was the last thing you expected from him. And truthfully, you weren’t sure he even owed you one because you had let it happen too.
“Don’t,” you cut in quickly, before he could go on. “I let it happen. I’m just as much to blame.”
You brushed past him, the air thick between you, and sank onto the couch, needing the distance, needing the cushions beneath you to ground yourself.
“Look, I’m sorry.” You exhaled heavily, eyes flicking to him. “For talking to Landon. I shouldn’t have. I should’ve… followed your rule.”
Jake moved toward you slowly, deliberate in every step, before lowering himself onto the couch beside you. His arm stretched along the backrest, hovering close without quite touching you.
“I think we’ve both been guilty of breaking rules lately, don’t you?” he murmured.
When you turned to look at him, that faint, teasing smirk tugged at his lips. It was enough to crack through your nerves, and you found yourself smiling, a soft laugh slipping out before you could stop it.
Jake’s grin widened when he noticed you relaxing, but it didn’t last long. He shifted in his seat, and after a stretch of silence, the weight between you pressed in again.
“So… what happens now?” you asked softly, almost afraid of the answer.
Jake leaned back, shoulders rising in a nonchalant shrug. “That’s up to you.”
Your brows pulled together, confusion flickering across your face.
He held your gaze. “If you want to stick to the original arrangement, we can. If you want to set new rules, we can do that too. And if you want to end it all, I’ll respect that.”
The words settled over you like a heavy blanket. You chewed at the inside of your cheek, replaying them in your head. New rules.
You had an idea of what he meant, your stomach twisted just thinking about it but asking outright would mean dragging that night into the open. You weren’t sure you were ready to say it out loud.
“New rules,” you whispered, barely above a breath. “What… what do you mean by that?”
Jake let out a slow sigh, his expression tightening.
“If you want to completely disregard your no-sex rule.”
Your stomach sank, his bluntness hitting like a stone to your chest. The words stripped everything raw, leaving your nerves buzzing with fear and disappointment. Because to him, that’s all it sounded like. Just sex. Nothing more.
“Hey.”
Jake’s voice snapped you out of your spiraling thoughts. Before you could retreat further into your head, his hands found you, guiding you gently closer. Your body responded before your mind could catch up, drawn into his space as though it belonged there. He brushed a strand of hair back from your face, his thumb lingering against your cheek, warm and careful, like he was holding something fragile.
“Tell me what you’re thinking,” he murmured, his eyes locked on yours with unnerving intensity.
You hesitated, your thoughts twisting over themselves. You couldn’t bring yourself to tell him everything, not yet. Not until you knew where he stood. If he wanted to keep this going. If he wanted to go back to the way things were. If he wanted to erase the no-sex rule entirely. Or… if maybe, just maybe, there were feelings hiding beneath your arrangement, the same way they had begun to bloom inside you.
“What do you want?” you asked softly, your voice almost breaking.
Jake’s jaw tightened. “What I want doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, it does.”
His brow furrowed. “Why?”
“Because I need to know if you’re feeling what I am.” You shifted closer, steadying yourself as you climbed onto his lap, settling against him but leaving just enough space to breathe. Your gaze held his, unflinching. “Because I need to know if that night changed something for you… the way it did for me.”
For the first time, Jake looked unsettled. Nervous, even. Your words had caught him off guard, stripped away the control he always carried like armor. He wasn’t used to being cornered like this, wasn’t used to being asked to open himself up. His line of work didn’t allow for it. Neither did his arrangements. Feelings, in his world, were a liability.
And when you climbed onto his lap, the shock flickered across his face, brief but undeniable. Still, his arms rose almost instinctively, wrapping around you with a rare gentleness as though, despite himself, he couldn’t push you away.
And then, quietly, he admitted: “It did.” His hand tightened on your waist, grounding you both. His eyes softened. “You have. Beyond that night.”
Your breath hitched. Your chest ached in the best and worst way, your heart fluttering wildly. You almost didn’t believe him, but the sincerity in his voice, the way his gaze lingered on you, told you everything. He felt it too. That spark. That dangerous, undeniable connection.
“But…”
No. Not but. You knew whatever came after would never be good.
“…whatever these feelings are, they can’t go beyond the deal we made.”
And just like that, the air left your lungs. Your heart splintered into pieces, sharp and merciless. You wanted to cry, to scream, to demand more but you just sat there, stunned. He’d warned you from the beginning. He told you this couldn’t go beyond the deal. And yet, hearing him say it now, knowing he felt something for you too, was a pain unlike anything else.
“But why—”
“Because I said so.” His interruption was soft, almost kind, but no less cruel.
“No.” You shook your head firmly, tears brimming. “No, that isn’t good enough. I want to know why. The real reason.”
“That is the real reason.”
“No!” The word tore from your throat, raw and desperate. You grabbed onto his chest, clinging to him like he was the only thing holding you up. “No, you can’t possibly tell me you’re okay with this. With us going back to some stupid sugar arrangement, pretending like there isn’t something real here. You can’t.”
His grip on your waist tightened, the pressure almost warning, as if he was torn between holding you close and pushing you away.
“Jake, please…” you breathed, the sound breaking on a whimper as your hands framed his face, forcing him to look at you.
He exhaled sharply, chest rising and falling against yours. His jaw clenched, eyes burning with something raw, something you’d never seen in him before.
“God… what are you doing to me?” he whispered, the words trembling on the edge of control before his lips crashed into yours.
You kissed him back instantly, fingers digging into his hair, pulling him impossibly closer. The kiss was slow at first. Soft, tender, aching with everything unspoken. But the longer it lingered, the more it changed, unraveling into something hungry, something neither of you could restrain.
Jake’s arms slid fully around your waist, locking you against him as he shifted, guiding you down until your back met the cushions beneath. He hovered over you, never once letting his lips part from yours, devouring every sound you made.
His hands were urgent, tugging at the hem of your shorts and pulling them down your legs in one swift motion. The kiss broke only long enough for his lips to trail lower, pressing along the line of your jaw, then down your neck, each touch searing.
When his mouth found your stomach, you shivered beneath him, his kisses leaving a heated path across your skin. His fingers toyed with the hem of your shirt before shoving it upward, exposing your soft curves to his hungry gaze. He lingered at your stomach, kissing, tasting, worshipping, until he reached the delicate band of your panties, hovering there, a silent question in the air, his breath hot against you.
You shifted restlessly beneath him, your body speaking the words your lips couldn’t. The silent plea wasn’t lost on Jake. His mouth curved into a dark smirk before he dipped lower, sinking his teeth gently into the soft skin of your stomach. The sting made you gasp, your hands flying to his hair, but before the sound could fade he was already tugging your underwear down in one swift motion.
You barely had time to catch your breath before he settled between your thighs, eyes locked on you with a hunger that made your pulse race. His grip was unrelenting as he forced your thighs apart, spreading you wide open for him. He didn’t waste a second, his mouth crashed against your soaked core, tongue lapping at you with a hunger that made your head snap back against the cushions.
“Fuck, Jake!” you cried, your voice breaking as the rough drag of his tongue sent sparks ripping through you. Your back arched violently, but his hands pinned your hips down, keeping you right where he wanted you. He growled against you, the vibration shooting straight through your core, and you clutched at his hair, desperate, needy, but he only worked you harder, like a man starved.
Your body thrashed against the cushions, but there was no escaping the rough rhythm of his mouth. His growl vibrated against your core, dragging another cry from your lips. He wasn’t letting you go, wasn’t giving you mercy, every movement of his tongue, every harsh suck pulled you closer to the edge whether you were ready or not.
You were already spiraling, every nerve lit on fire under his mouth, but Jake only grew rougher. His tongue plunged deeper, his lips sealing around your clit with a hard, punishing suck that made you scream. Your hands flew down to push at his head, desperate for a break, but he just growled against you and pinned your wrists flat to your thighs, locking you wide open for him.
“Jake, please—“ your voice cracked, your body trembling violently under the assault of his mouth.
He didn’t stop. If anything, your pleading spurred him on. His tongue lashed over you in quick, ruthless strokes, his teeth grazing just enough to make you cry out again. His grip bruised your skin as he forced you still, dragging you closer and closer to the inevitable.
You shattered with a broken scream, your back arching off the couch as your orgasm ripped through you, overwhelming, unbearable. But Jake didn’t let go. He kept his mouth locked on you, tongue working mercilessly, swallowing every sound you made as you convulsed beneath him.
“Too much! Please!” you begged, tears pricking your eyes as your body shook uncontrollably. But Jake was relentless. He pinned you tighter, tongue moving with feral precision, drawing out every last wave until you were nothing but sobs and gasps, ruined and trembling.
By the time he finally pulled back, his mouth glistened with you, his chest heaving as he dragged his gaze up your wrecked body.
You were still trembling, trying to catch your breath, when Jake sat up and shoved his pants down, his cock already hard and aching for you.
“Come here,” he ordered, voice low and commanding as he leaned back against the couch.
You obeyed without hesitation, crawling into his lap. His hands were rough and sure, dragging you closer until you were straddling him. He didn’t give you time to think. One hand gripped your waist tight, the other wrapped around his length as he positioned himself at your entrance.
“Nice and slow …” he muttered, but the way he forced you down said otherwise. He guided you onto him inch by inch, stretching you open until the burn had you gasping.
Your nails dug into his shoulders, eyes locking with his as he filled you deeper, deeper, until you were seated fully on him, his cock buried to the hilt inside you.
“That’s it,” he rasped against your ear, his breath hot on your skin. “Take me, baby. All of me.”
A broken moan escaped your lips, your body shuddering around him as you tried to adjust. He didn’t let you. His hand tightened on your waist, holding you in place, making sure you felt every inch of him stretching you wide and claiming you completely.
Jake’s grip on your hips was iron as he set the pace, guiding you up and down on his cock with controlled force. His eyes never left yours, watching every twitch, every moan that slipped out of you as if he owned them. After a while, he loosened his hold, letting you take the rhythm he’d carved into you.
His fingers tugged at the hem of your shirt, voice rough.
“Take this off.”
You tried to keep moving, your hips rolling over him as your shaky hands fumbled with the fabric. He grew impatient, helping you rip it over your head until it was discarded on the floor. The moment your chest was bare, Jake pulled you closer until your breasts were right in his face.
You gasped, your pace faltering when his mouth latched onto your skin, trailing hot, wet kisses across the curve of your breast before his lips closed firmly around your nipple. He sucked hard, tongue flicking in maddening circles while his teeth scraped lightly, sending shocks straight through your body.
“Fuck, Jake,” you moaned, arching into him. One hand slid into his hair, tugging it back so you could see him, his lips wrapped tight around you, his eyes half-lidded with hunger.
He devoured you, biting, licking, sucking until the sensitive bud was swollen and raw with his attention. Then, without mercy, he moved to your other breast, giving it the same treatment, your cries growing louder with each pull of his mouth.
The mixture of sensations, his cock stretching you, the way he was claiming your chest with his mouth was too much. Heat pooled in your stomach, your thighs trembling as the familiar wave of your second climax began to build, threatening to crash over you hard and fast.
When he was satisfied, both your nipples swollen and sensitive from his mouth, Jake finally pulled back, chest heaving as his eyes dropped to the sight of you bouncing on his cock. The hunger in his stare made your body burn hotter. He wasn’t far behind you; you could feel the way he twitched inside, the tension in his muscles coiling like a spring.
“Fuck,” he groaned, the sound deep and raw, tilting his head back for a second before snapping forward again with a glare that pinned you in place. His hand slid to your ass, fingers digging into your flesh, and in the next breath he took control back, slamming his hips upward with brutal force.
You cried out, your rhythm breaking as his thrusts from below nearly lifted you off him. The rough, relentless pace stole the breath from your lungs, his cock driving into you deeper, harder than you could manage on your own. Every upward snap of his hips made your vision blur, your nails clawing at his shoulders for something to hold onto.
“Jake!” you gasped, overwhelmed by the way he was using every ounce of strength to fuck up into you, leaving you helpless to do anything but take it.
You leaned in closer, your forehead nearly brushing his, hot breaths tangling as your moans and whimpers spilled out uncontrollably. His eyes darkened at the sound, the raw need in them making your stomach twist even tighter.
“That’s it,” Jake growled, thrusting up into you harder, faster, his voice rough against your ear. “Give it to me. Let me feel you.”
That was all it took, your body snapped, pleasure tearing through you in a wave so sharp it made you collapse against his shoulder. You cried out against his skin as your climax ripped through you, stronger, harder than the first, your walls pulsing tight around him while he fucked you right through it.
“Fuck—” Jake’s voice broke, his pace faltering as his thrusts turned rough and desperate. Each snap of his hips grew sloppier, heavier, his breath hot and ragged against your neck. You could hear the low curses tumbling from his lips as he buried himself deep again and again, chasing that edge.
Then it hit him, his entire body tensing beneath you as he spilled inside, a guttural groan tearing from his chest. “Shiiiit…” he dragged out, voice thick with release, driving into you one last time before collapsing back against the couch. His chest heaved against yours, both of you sinking into the mess of sweat and shuddering breaths.
You lay against his shoulder, still trying to catch your breath. When his hands slipped from your hips, panic prickled your chest. Last time, this was when he shut down, when he turned cold and left you to sit in the silence alone. You almost didn’t dare to look at him, terrified that meeting his gaze would shatter whatever fragile spell still lingered between you.
But then his arms came back, wrapping firm and steady around your waist, and something inside you fluttered, hope.
“Hey.”
You finally looked up.
“Let’s get cleaned up, hm?”
Your brows lifted in surprise, but you nodded quickly.
He helped you off his lap and stood, fingers catching yours as he led you down the hall like he already knew the way. Without hesitation, he found your bathroom, flipped the light on, and tossed his shirt aside before turning the shower on.
“Hot or cold?”
“Hot.” Your voice was shy, barely above a whisper.
“Figures.” A soft chuckle rumbled from him.
When the water ran just right, he stepped in first, holding a hand out for you. You took it, letting him draw you under the spray. For a moment, you both just stood there, water rolling down your skin as if it could rinse away the weight between you. Jake’s hand found your cheek, his thumb brushing slowly as a faint smile tugged at his lips. Then, he leaned in and kissed you, unhurried, lingering, achingly tender.
You melted, humming softly against his mouth, drunk on the gentleness he rarely showed.
When he finally pulled back, he reached for your body wash and loofah. You blinked, stunned, watching him lather it up. He didn’t say a word as he began to wash you, each stroke deliberate, careful as though you were something precious in his hands.
It felt unreal. Like any second he’d shut off again, leave you cold and confused. But he didn’t. Not this time.
When the shower ended, you stepped out first, steam curling around your skin. Jake grabbed your robe, holding it open for you before reaching for a towel himself, wrapping it casually around his waist.
Without hesitation, he laced his fingers with yours again and led you into your bedroom. His eyes wandered briefly, taking in the space, before he slipped away. You frowned, the empty air where his hand had been suddenly cold. When he returned, he carried his shirt, wordlessly handing it to you.
You accepted it, cheeks warming as you clutched the fabric to your chest. Turning to your dresser, you fished out fresh panties, loosening the robe and letting it slide down to the floor. The cotton was cool against your skin as you slipped them on, then tugged his shirt over your head. It hung loose, swallowing you whole, and somehow made you feel more exposed than before.
But when you turned back, Jake was gone again.
Your stomach dropped. Fear seeped in like ice water. Had he left? Was this where it ended? You padded toward the door, only to freeze when he appeared in the doorway, now dressed only in his boxers. Relief rushed through you, leaving your knees a little weak.
“Was wondering where you went,” you murmured, a nervous little laugh breaking out of you.
Jake’s grin was easy, disarming. “Come on.”
He reached for your hand again, guiding you toward the bed. He slid in first, propping himself back against your pillows before opening an arm, inviting you in without a word.
You hesitated for only a beat before climbing in beside him. His arm came around you immediately, firm and protective, pulling you into the warmth of his chest.
A sigh slipped out of you, unbidden, as his hand slowly traced down your back, steady, soothing. For the first time in what felt like forever, you let yourself relax. Sleep tugged at you, but you fought it, clinging to the moment, afraid that if you drifted off, it would all vanish, that he’d vanish.
But in the end, the steady rhythm of his breathing, the weight of his arm around you, and the quiet safety of his presence lulled you under.
The next morning, you stirred awake to the cool stretch of an empty bed. Blinking against the soft light, you sat up slowly, scanning the room. The shirt on your body, the one he’d given you, kept you calm for a fleeting second. He wouldn’t have left. Not after last night.
But the silence in your apartment dragged on, heavy and unbroken, until fear clawed up your chest.
The door creaked, and you gasped when Jake stepped inside.
“Hey,” he said softly, a small smile tugging at his lips. “You’re up.”
You nodded quickly, taking him in. Jeans, shoes on, ready to go.
“Leaving?” Your voice was small, betraying more than you wanted it to.
He sighed, crossing the room to sit beside you, his presence steadying you instantly. “Duty calls.”
Your frown deepened, but before you could reply, he added, “I’ll be back later.”
Hope flickered in your chest, just enough to ease the sting.
His gaze dropped to the shirt hanging loose on your frame. “I do need my shirt back, though.”
You laughed softly, nervous. “What if I don’t want to give it back?”
Jake pushed to his feet, eyes glinting. “Alright, then. I’ll just leave like—”
“No!” You cut him off, scrambling onto your knees. “Alright.”
Slowly, you lifted the hem of the shirt, slipping it over your head, eyes locked on his the whole time. The air between you tightened.
Jake exhaled sharply, his gaze raking over your bare skin. “Fuck,” he muttered under his breath.
He slipped the shirt from your hands, tugging it back over his head.
“You’re gonna be the death of me,” he muttered, shaking his head with the faintest grin.
You giggled softly, the sound breaking the quiet tension. He leaned in, stealing a kiss. Slow, unhurried, lingering just long enough to make it hard for you to let him go.
“I’ll see you later,” he murmured against your lips.
You nodded, trying not to show how much you wanted him to stay.
“Breakfast will be delivered,” he added casually, already moving for the door. A moment later, you heard the front door open and click shut behind him.
You let out a dreamy sigh, sinking back onto your bed, staring at the ceiling, heart caught somewhere between hope and dread. Whatever this was, you wanted it to last but with Jake, you never knew if it would.
Jake jogged lightly down the apartment stairwell. For once, his chest didn’t feel so tight. Last night lingered in his bones like a rare kind of warmth, the kind he didn’t let himself feel often.
He exhaled a laugh under his breath, shaking his head. “The death of me,” he muttered again, but this time it wasn’t just a throwaway line. You really could be.
Stepping into the cool morning air, he crossed to his car. His good mood dipped the moment his eyes scanned the street, his instincts switching on without thought. Old habits, necessary ones. A man in his line of work didn’t get the luxury of distraction.
Sliding into the driver’s seat, Jake gripped the steering wheel and stared at his reflection in the rearview. He should’ve left it at the deal, kept it clean and simple. Now there were feelings tangled up in something that could never stay neat.
You didn’t know who he was. What he did when he wasn’t with you. And you couldn’t.
Jake started the engine, jaw tightening as the rumble filled the silence. For a fleeting moment, he let himself think about you waiting upstairs, maybe still in bed, maybe smiling to yourself. Then, with a sharp breath, he pushed the thought away. He had work to do.
I don't like the new single (don't get me wrong, the song's good, but the mix just completely ruins it... again); I LOVE Sam's new haircut; I just burned the onion I was frying while contemplating this and now I had to chop a new batch.
jacobvanloon
kianamaiart
izzy806
