a ౨ৎ

the diary entries of a lovesick 18 year old girlblogger/poet

[mysacredsecrets]

[floralenthus1asm]

[eternaloptimistsphere]

start seeing everything as God, but keep it a secret

[strokeofserenity]

[itgirlmaterial]

[beinglily222]

[mysacredsecrets]

life is hard when it’s easier to succumb than to fight

if i want a good life, i must be strong

but courage does not take one day to build

i will get there one day

baby steps

i’m trying

because right now all i feel is the world swallowing me whole

the weight of my sin’s suffocating me into oblivion

i want to love myself

but i’m infamous for desiring things and never obtaining them. i’m completely unreliable, untrustworthy, and a liar to myself and others.

i want to get better

but each time i try i fall into this conniving cycle of failing and retrying and failing and hating myself. i don’t know how to get out. i’ve been trapped in the prison cell that is my brain for so long i see no way out i’ve forgotten what the outside world looks like. it’s so dark and miserable in here, what id give to experience life as it was before. anything for that sweet innocence. i wish i knew nothing. i wish i was stupid and carefree and happy and unaware.

i wish for so many things.

expect everything

receive nothing

disappointing every time

so should i have 0 expectations? for who? everyone or myself? i don’t know

[prinz-myshkin]

Bothersome beast, comforting friend

[mysacredsecrets]

[girlintodust]

[deletedun-deactivated20250504]

to marry someone, to me, how strong love can be, to marry one person, dedicate your life to her, to you, my angel, i didn't forget how much life your smile gives me light, or how much security your words enchanted my soul, knowing you, waking up to you.

'good morning' you said with your soft voice, I kiss you a thousand times

[sinwas]

Sylvia Plath

[anistonx]

[emilyfuckingb-deactivated202503]

[lgcbk]

fatima aamer bilal, from i mother it the absence of her, iii. i am not a person that can be loved for a very long time excerpt from moony moonless sky. ( full post in source ).

[lifeinpoetry]

“oh / I want something so beautiful I forget my life.”

— Melissa Stein, from “Aquarium,” Rough Honey

[lilita4ever]