nachito

side account where i repost and post random stuff mostly BCS & BRBA | ITA | she/her, 25 | age gap height gap power gap cartel yayoi between a reguetón dembow latino and a cumbia ranchera latino

[nachosjavelin]

guys if you see a profile named @a-thenais liking your BCS/BB stuff, it's ME, I don't understand why, even though I'm logged into this one account, it keeps liking stuff with that.

it's my writing/official account where i have to be mysterious and aesthetic for branding, but yeah, I mean, for BCS/BB related stuff, interact with this one plss

[nachosjavelin]

some girls ask their boyfriends for flowers or take them out on fun dates, i ask mine to be lalo salamanca so i can be nacho varga

[nachosjavelin]

I can't stop thinking about Nacho's childhood, teenage years, and early adulthood. I wish I had the strength to write all about it. Who knows, maybe a series of one shots. As if I don't have enough on my plate.

[nachosjavelin]

Now that my family is facing economic issues after years and my 60 year old dad is back at working a very physical job 8 hours a day, the only way I'm left to personally cope with the preoccupation, apart from therapy and knowing I'm doing as much as I can not to be a burden to them, is just reminiscing of when an even worse situation was happening when I was a teenager and just feeling very close to Nacho and my headcanons about his past.

Money struggle is something that very much defined my own childhood and teenage years, I hadn't realized how much it impacted me until it happened again recently and it just brought back all the inadequacy feelings, the guilt, the heaviness, and, now that I am an adult, the urge to act and provide.

My father is also an immigrant like Manuel Varga, and although he does have Italian citizenship and he knows the language very well, there's some parts and layers of meaning of being the daughter/son of a struggling immigrant that just add to the struggle.

I'm not trying to say I'm similar to Nacho, I am really not, and I don't want to be, and his situation is luckily 10 times worse than mine was, I'm just writing this to get out of the system that having characters I can relate to and who can help me externalize this particular heaviness is a blessing.

[nachosjavelin]

cute movie game! thanks to @2manystops for tagging me <3

rules without naming them, post 10 of your favorite films and then tag 10 people to do the same.

[lluvichan]

[nachosjavelin]

"No sé qué tienen las flores, llorona Las flores del campo santo No sé qué tienen las flores, llorona Las flores del campo santo Que cuando las mueve el viento, llorona Parece que están llorando Que cuando las mueve el viento, llorona Parece que están llorando".

("La Llorona", Chavela Vargas)

A small tribute to Nacho Varga under the cut.

An ofrenda uncharacteristically lit up during a hot May day. A red toy with peeling paint. An old dollar bill. A black and white picture of a cradle. A wide smile so rarely seen on a color one.

Manuel holds a uniform just like his own to his chest. It's the third time he has unfolded it and folded it, searching for fleeting remnants. But his baby boy's smell is gone. It had been gone for a long time. The only signs of his son ever having inhabited that pair of trousers and the shirt are the stains and holes in it, frozen in time forever like the pictures he's staring at with his lips pursed and his eyes shutting closed every time the smile and the eyes in the photograph begin to move.

Maybe it's his tears making them flicker. Maybe it's the desperate need to see something other than himself in that room move.

He touches the frame as if instead of red plastic he could find the rough edges of a face that resembled his, wanting to cradle it one last time.

The ofrenda is not the only thing haunted by the choir of furies that was his son. Children of different ages are looking down at him: babies clenching their tiny fists, boys with sewing machines and headphones, kids in the pool learning how to swim, young men who didn't want their picture taken anymore. They're all him, and they're all living on his walls for him not to forget his face.

Manuel Varga folds the black-and-white uniform one last time for that day, and puts it next to the ofrenda, hoping that wherever his Nacho is, he's not cold.

And he's loved.

And he's reachable.

[nachosjavelin]

spamming peter and vince with emails until they release the lacho shower scene

[themadknightuniverse]

Domingo is so patient with Nacho :)) ♦ Commission for @kyshkasa 💖

[nachosjavelin]

was watching the scene at the hospital where the twins order arturo and nacho to speak to héctor, had to share this iconic comment with y'all

[kyshkasa]

[slowburnout]

They’re making me go to work instead of drawing cartel yaoi

[themadknightuniverse]

feral Tuquito! Commission for @kyshkasa 💖

[nachosjavelin]

I can't stop thinking about Nacho's childhood, teenage years, and early adulthood. I wish I had the strength to write all about it. Who knows, maybe a series of one shots. As if I don't have enough on my plate.

[nachosjavelin]

worst kind of people: those who ask for feedback but then don't accept it because it's not positive

[kosmogrl]

how it feels when one of your hyperfixations comes back and stronger than ever

[ilynpilled]

how it feels when one of your hyperfixations comes back and stronger than ever

[pulim-v]

how it feels when one of your hyperfixations comes back and stronger than ever

[nachosjavelin]

whoever headcanons that lalo is ripped can't see the truth

[slowburnout]

He crosses his muscled forearms over his body and grabs the hem of his t-shirt, pulls it up revealing a trail of hair going up his soft belly from waistband to navel. His chest flexes when he pulls the shirt over his head and drops it on the floor.

Ch 13