[0v9]

I suffer from a disease called "can load the dishwasher correctly" it's incredibly rare, very few people have it

[shymagnolia]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[shymagnolia]

okay so i just got my dream job??? a week after applying to it?? and now i’m thinking….maybe this is the good luck post

[flagellant]

…..not even six hours later i got an offer of a well paying full time long-term job with free room and board in queens in nyc, allowing me independence and a way to escape an abusive situation and an unhealthy environment

likes charge reblogs cast, folks, this is the good luck post

[amy-santiagos]

[cozycreaturescorner]

[federalbureauofislam]

no offence but do i look like i understand anything

[pagetbrewstar]

me: *watches criminal minds for 9 hours* anything: *makes a noise* me: I’m looking for a white male between the ages of 25-45 probably a loner probably most definitely hates women probably drives a red late model dodge truck probably lives alone his moms name is Helen and his favorite color skittles are the red ones

[kotortwo]

literally obsessed with this tiktok (x)

[nultemp]

Godzilla

[ukulelekatie]

oh hi thanks for checking in I’m still a piece of garbage

[softlyshine]

REASONS TO DATE ME

im really pretty if im the only one in the room and theres no one to compare me to

really though i have nice hair and i’d let u play with it

also nice lips 

im very nice 

id probably never make you feel bad abt yourself and if i did i’d apologize for like 3000 yrs afterwards

i’ll laugh at ur jokes

i’ll always want to make out or be touching in some way

i wear lots of sweaters so im basically adorable

i’ll love u a lot

[velvet-thirst]

Imagine we get our first apartment. We put on music and dance stupidly around the empty space and boxes. So happy, finally, it feels like our life together can start.

[davisanthony]

I missed a “you up?” Text three years ago and haven’t gone to bed before 2 am since

[ampervadasz]

[skypig357]

Get your ass on the dance floor

[runwithskizzers]

this is already on my blog like five times and i honestly don’t even care

[theprettylittleblogger]

“I hate waking up with you on my mind and not in my bed.”

— (via difficult)

[thelovejandles]

[jakemorph]

in this essay i won’t

[thelighttasteslikelasagna]

hesitate, bitch

[jedthewolfdog]

does anyone ever do the opposite of dissociate?? where youre just suddenly and uncomfortably aware of your situation and reality 

[jedthewolfdog]

more to the point why do i get that feeling when im sitting on top of my kitchen table watching a velveeta mac and cheese pack spin in the microwave for three and a half minutes and im just like I Exist I Am Here And Theres Nothing I Can Do About It 

[jedthewolfdog]

okay this one wins, everyone can stop reblogging this now 

[fairycosmos]

i’m just a bitch with bad posture and an irregular sleeping schedule