Nails

whatever whatever none of your business ✞ he/they ✞ 25

[nails-for-your-coffin]

DNI

✞ Minors.

✞ Clown haters.

✞ Clown enjoyers.

✞ Clowns.

✞ Lab interns. A hate you please die.

✞ Lab undergrads. I already have to deal with way too many of you irl.

✞ Lab postgrads. Wtf are you doing in here? Go back to your experiment, you're running out of time and it's due next semester. You're welcome for the reminder.

✞ Joe. You know what you did.

✞ My father. GO BACK TO PRISON SHITHEAD

✞ Ants.

✞ Fruit flies.

✞ Bugs in general.

✞ Taylor Swift fans. You're weird and smell bad.

✞ Taylor Swift haters. I don't care about that random blonde girl.

✞ Taylor Swift. Go steal someone else's style, basic.

✞ Pseudo Vikings. You guys are cringe.

✞ Coffin makers. I'm trying to run a business here.

✞ Green. You are a weirdo and a menace to society and gastronomy.

Don't test me, or you'll get in here as well.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Am I permitted to inquire about the clown hatred?

Yes you are, until this moment inquiring about clowns is not a part of my DNI.

Yet.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

I hate your DNI. Your DNI sucks also isn't your partner and friend Clowns? Actually, you're a clown yourself so you're breaking your own DNI. EDIT IT, BITCH.

Yes my partner is a clown and one of my best friends as well.

That does not make me a clown however.

You say a lot for an anom you know, have some corage and message me with your REAL account and let me see your DNI what about that huh huh

I bet YOU ARE A CLOWN

If you are

DO NOT INTERACT HERE FUCKASS

[nails-for-your-coffin]

You should take a page out of your partner's book and embrace the whimsy of clownery. You're so fucking emo coded it makes you boring to watch.

Be more fun!

There's enough clown bs on my daily life at the moment I don't think I have space for any more of that. Also do I look like a fucking tv show to you? If you want to distract yourself go touch grass or something.

[pudding-the-clown]

Are you guys gonna laugh at me if I quit my job?

[harry-the-worst]

Yep.

(I won’t. But… didn’t you just start working there?)

[nails-for-your-coffin]

They're not going back to that place.

[devils-oath]

every day i forget my age and every day i have to work it out again

[nails-for-your-coffin]

You're 82.

Old man. (neutral)

[devils-oath]

who the fuck are you

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Your grandkid.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Holy fuck, alright. So, things went to shit at the haunted house and @totallynotlondon will be offline because her phone is broken, so if you have any questions about this just send them to me and I'll ask her or something. Or wait until she fixes it. Just, please, be fucking resonable and give her some space, she needs to rest right now.

LISTEN THIS IS THE ONLY TIME I'LL ALLOW PEOPLE TO SEND ME ASKS OKAY?

Speaking of phones, pudding the STUPID DUMB clown dropped theirs in the toilet so that's why I couldn't grab a hold of them for the past few days. I was almost vomiting from anxiety thinking that motherfucker was being sold on the deep web for their orgarms or something, but nope! Turns out they were living large eating popcorn and watching a tv show when I arrived at home after a week at that hellhole.

I'll be landing them mine until their weird ass suspicious job finally pays them.

In other news, apparently now I can...do stuff. I'm not quite sure how to process this, and to be honest I still kind of think I'm imagining things and this is just me going insane from shock, so I'm not posting it on the internet yet.

BE CURIOUS I GUESS

Anyway, yeah.

[totallynotlondon]

hiii srry forgot 2 respond 2 this uh im booked in with a therapist i think? idk i gotta find some way 2 go down the hell hole cause its with some weird demon things. i need it. u probs need it 2. lmk if u do. just bring some rocks.

also dont act like i don't appear in ur ask box at random. i will never leave.

so jokes aside. we almost got our asses killed a few nights ago as i think i mentioned and i am not going near that place again any time soon. fuck those renovations, fuck those monsters i aint touching them. beatrice can do it. literally anyone else can. besides gaster. I know hes dead but fuck that bitch. anyways good pudz is okay. i think santa gave my dad a new-ish phone for christmas-- actually he gave it away :/ but we probably have an old phone or smthing somewhere if u need it. and hope the moneys enough nails.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Don't even worry about money now, alright? Actually, you can use it to get the therapy thing figure out if you want. We can go have some coffee whenever you are free, just please try to foccus on yourself a bit, Lon. I'll be here :)

Pudz said that if it isn't asking too much, they'll love to borrow the phone until they can get a new one. Their fuckass job is shaddy as hell and I already convinced them to quit it before I have to drag them out of a ice bath or something.

Holy shit.

[totallynotlondon]

nah i said i'd pay u so u get paid. also u can use it 4 ur own sessions. We both need it. and im focusing on myself plenty

It isn't at all. I'll drop it by your place later. With some burgers 2. Do u guys have any diet stuff or allergies?

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Alright, thanks Lon. You should stay for movies. Pudz said they're making dessert.

[croakerverse-lore]

Lore fact: After hours of gruelling research into Colter White’s (@the-muppet-joker) character, I have written what is objectively his most scientifically accurate characterisation in this fanfiction! (Minors DNI for this one!)

Published | Croakerverse

SOLD TO THE MUPPET JOKER X READER 18+ LEMON

“Y/N!” I heard my so called “mother” call me down. I grumbled in frustration and dissapointment. My life really isn’t that easy. Toda

[the-muppet-joker]

YOU WROTE A FANFICTION WHERE I TURN EMO????

[croakerverse-lore]

They what.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Color this goth surprised.

[devils-oath]

every day i forget my age and every day i have to work it out again

[nails-for-your-coffin]

You're 82.

Old man. (neutral)

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Holy fuck, alright. So, things went to shit at the haunted house and @totallynotlondon will be offline because her phone is broken, so if you have any questions about this just send them to me and I'll ask her or something. Or wait until she fixes it. Just, please, be fucking resonable and give her some space, she needs to rest right now.

LISTEN THIS IS THE ONLY TIME I'LL ALLOW PEOPLE TO SEND ME ASKS OKAY?

Speaking of phones, pudding the STUPID DUMB clown dropped theirs in the toilet so that's why I couldn't grab a hold of them for the past few days. I was almost vomiting from anxiety thinking that motherfucker was being sold on the deep web for their orgarms or something, but nope! Turns out they were living large eating popcorn and watching a tv show when I arrived at home after a week at that hellhole.

I'll be landing them mine until their weird ass suspicious job finally pays them.

In other news, apparently now I can...do stuff. I'm not quite sure how to process this, and to be honest I still kind of think I'm imagining things and this is just me going insane from shock, so I'm not posting it on the internet yet.

BE CURIOUS I GUESS

Anyway, yeah.

[totallynotlondon]

hiii srry forgot 2 respond 2 this uh im booked in with a therapist i think? idk i gotta find some way 2 go down the hell hole cause its with some weird demon things. i need it. u probs need it 2. lmk if u do. just bring some rocks.

also dont act like i don't appear in ur ask box at random. i will never leave.

so jokes aside. we almost got our asses killed a few nights ago as i think i mentioned and i am not going near that place again any time soon. fuck those renovations, fuck those monsters i aint touching them. beatrice can do it. literally anyone else can. besides gaster. I know hes dead but fuck that bitch. anyways good pudz is okay. i think santa gave my dad a new-ish phone for christmas-- actually he gave it away :/ but we probably have an old phone or smthing somewhere if u need it. and hope the moneys enough nails.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Don't even worry about money now, alright? Actually, you can use it to get the therapy thing figure out if you want. We can go have some coffee whenever you are free, just please try to foccus on yourself a bit, Lon. I'll be here :)

Pudz said that if it isn't asking too much, they'll love to borrow the phone until they can get a new one. Their fuckass job is shaddy as hell and I already convinced them to quit it before I have to drag them out of a ice bath or something.

Holy shit.

[totallynotlondon]

Hey, that whole situation was insane and really scary. I hope you are okay? I already told you this but, seriously, if you need anything please just let me know. I'll be here.

yk i talked 2 dad and he said i should b more honest and no no im not ok. i feel like actual shit

they literally

how

why

????????????????????????????????????

they fucking tried to kill me. thats the like. 3rd tiem something like that has happened.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

I'm so sorry Lon. I wish I could have done more to protect you.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

uhhhhh whastbrhee hell jappened?? are yotu good? is london ok?? did yaou get the anaimatrienics??

Hey, we're safe now, out of the house already. Replies are shit because I'm currently sharing my phone with my partner, but yeah. London is okay, coping I think? She's been through a lot. The animatronics just...? Became sentient? I have no idea, but apparently something around that weird ass game, you know? Someone relative of London's just showed up and helped us get out.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Holy fuck, alright. So, things went to shit at the haunted house and @totallynotlondon will be offline because her phone is broken, so if you have any questions about this just send them to me and I'll ask her or something. Or wait until she fixes it. Just, please, be fucking resonable and give her some space, she needs to rest right now.

LISTEN THIS IS THE ONLY TIME I'LL ALLOW PEOPLE TO SEND ME ASKS OKAY?

Speaking of phones, pudding the STUPID DUMB clown dropped theirs in the toilet so that's why I couldn't grab a hold of them for the past few days. I was almost vomiting from anxiety thinking that motherfucker was being sold on the deep web for their orgarms or something, but nope! Turns out they were living large eating popcorn and watching a tv show when I arrived at home after a week at that hellhole.

I'll be landing them mine until their weird ass suspicious job finally pays them.

In other news, apparently now I can...do stuff. I'm not quite sure how to process this, and to be honest I still kind of think I'm imagining things and this is just me going insane from shock, so I'm not posting it on the internet yet.

BE CURIOUS I GUESS

Anyway, yeah.

[nails-for-your-coffin]

@totallynotlondon we're going to be fine, alright? We're going to solve this somehow

[nails-for-your-coffin]

I'm currently in the camera room with London @totallynotlondon and the fucking robots are trashing the whole place and I can't get in touch with pudz and it's driving me insane we literally spend the whole afternoon painting that goddamn door and now it's all scratched by one of those fucking machines i swear i'm going to lose it why don't they answer the phone my god please let it be just their stupid ass forgeting the charger somewhere and not something bad please please please

[nails-for-your-coffin]

Please for the love of God please answer your phone @pudding-the-clown

[nails-for-your-coffin]

ATTENTION YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!

Does anyone that follows me on this godforsaken website knows any good information about Five Nights at Freddy's???

I'M BEING SERIOUS THIS IS NOT A DRILL

How do aniamtronics work?

Any good tips on how to defeat them?

Anything really.

SEND ME THE INFO RIGHT NOW