It's Canon I Swear

A totally accurate recount of our favorite fox boy and all of his adventures

[narutobutitscanon]

Kakashi, after being told he can't give dogs the right to vote: This sucks. What does the Hokage even do?!

Gai: His best!

[narutobutitscanon]

Sakura: Going to Plan B?

Kakashi: Technically, that would be Plan G.

Naruto: How many plans do we have? Is there, like, a Plan M?

Kakashi: Yeah. Naruto dies in Plan M.

Sasuke: I like Plan M.

[narutobutitscanon]

Minato: The Hokage was going to give us an ANBU guard for when Kushina goes into labor, but I told him that wasn't necessary.

Minato: Then I gave Kushina a gun.

Minato:...I think we'll be fine.

*Later*

Kushina: YOU TAKE ONE STEP CLOSER AND ILL SHOOT YOUR ASS I MAY BE PUSHING A BABY OUT OF MY BODY BUT ILL ALSO PUSH YOUR SOUL INTO HELL IF YOU TEST ME

Obito: *running away* nopenopenopenope-

Minato, holding Kushina's hand: You're doing great, sweetheart.

[narutobutitscanon]

Hashirama: Madara, show yourself!

Madara, emerging from the smoke as just a silhouette: *laughing evilly* Alright alright. I have arriv-

Tobirama, teleporting right in Madara's face: Hi. Hello. What do you want?

Madara: *sarcastically* THANK YOU Tobirama I LOVE how you just RUINED my dramatic introduction.

Tobirama: Well, your face ruined my day.

Tobirama: So we'll call it even.

[narutobutitscanon]

Yamato: So, let's start by talking about some of the emotions you're feeling right now.

Sasuke: Stabbing.

Yamato: Stabbing isn't really an emotion. It's more of an activity. That I hope you don't do to me.

Yamato: See, an emotion is more of a feeling.

Sasuke: Well, maybe, I feel stabby.

[narutobutitscanon]

Rin: Are you sure that's a wise decision?

Obito: I never made a wise decision in my life, and never will.

[narutobutitscanon]

You can trust me because I don’t care enough about you to lie.

Ino Yamanaka

[narutobutitscanon]

Hashirama: I love how we're always on the same page.

Tobirama: Same page? We're not reading the same book! We're not even in the same library!

[narutobutitscanon]

Kakashi, seeing Naruto approaching from behind Sasuke: Sasuke, I'm going to ask you not to do anything violent.

Sasuke: What? What are you talking about? I only use violence as an appropriate response.

Naruto: Sasuke-teme!

Sasuke, eyes widening: *turns and punches Naruto directly in the face*

[narutobutitscanon]

Naruto: I’m glad you decided to turn good and all. What are your plans now?

Obito: Dying

Kakashi: That’s a mood

[submitted by @severnskull ]

[narutobutitscanon]

Obito: Okay, that Might Guy is incredibly weird.

Sakura: Obito-sensei, aren't you half a tree?

Obito: I'm not the one wearing green spandex and spouting about youth every 5 seconds.

[narutobutitscanon]

I’m fine. Sakura-chan said all my bleeding was internal. That’s where the blood’s supposed to be!

Naruto Uzumaki

[narutobutitscanon]

so! we’re gonna be adding incorrect quotes from other media more now recently, we’ve noticed that a lot of our content is original stuff. and while that’s all cool and good, it also leads us to burnouts! additionally, it limits us to only focusing on naruto and the content there. now, we love naruto, but sometimes you just really get into other series and you can’t help yourself.

All of this will be cited in the tags so check to see if it’s #original incorrect or #source: [media] to see the difference. If there’s neither then assume it’s original (and if it’s not original and there’s no source don’t be afraid to tell us!!) BASICALLY: there will still be original content like you’ve been seeing but also more incorrect quotes from books, tv shows, movies, etc. etc.

thank u and have a great day

[narutobutitscanon]

HELLO! I am sadly burnt out of quote ideas— I mean I’ll post whenever I can think of one, but in this time of empty braincells don’t forget you can submit your own quotes!!! I’m a bit of an actual idiot so I might forget to check the inbox for,,,, days at a time but-! I will get to all eventually & queue them up!!

— admin Sheeswee, with love

[narutobutitscanon]

also give love to admin sheeswee because i havent been on this blog (and really tumblr as a whole) in what feels like a year so what an icon we stan the only reason this thing is alive still

[narutobutitscanon]

Karin: oh wow your cologne smells amazing

Sasuke: it’s bug spray

[narutobutitscanon]

HELLO! I am sadly burnt out of quote ideas— I mean I’ll post whenever I can think of one, but in this time of empty braincells don’t forget you can submit your own quotes!!! I’m a bit of an actual idiot so I might forget to check the inbox for,,,, days at a time but-! I will get to all eventually & queue them up!!

— admin Sheeswee, with love

[narutobutitscanon]

Deidara: I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. A guy asked me what the Spanish word for tortilla was once and now I dream of kissing him under the moonlight.

Hidan: What kind of animal is the Pink Panther

Deidara, already taking off his clothes: Hidan you’re so fucking stupid