Let me be radically, uncomfortably honest about what I'm searching for.
A partner who understands that love and kink aren't mutually exclusive….they're intertwined. I want someone who sees power exchange as intimacy, not performance. Someone who knows the difference between control and care. Someone who can hold space for my darkness without trying to fix it.
I'm looking for the kind of connection where we can laugh, cry, fight, fuck, and fall apart together…and still choose each other the next morning. The kind where submission is a gift, not a given. Where trust is built in the small moments, not just the big ones.
I want someone who understands that my body is a complicated landscape…one made and shaped by trauma, chronic illness, and survival. Someone who doesn't flinch at the scars, the limitations, the days I can't get out of bed. Someone who sees my fragility and doesn't mistake it for weakness.
What I'm NOT looking for:
I'm not looking for a caretaker. I'm not looking for someone to save me, fix me, or fund me. I'm looking for a partner…equal, even when the scales are uneven.
I'm not looking for someone who will resent my limitations. Who will grow tired of the cancellations, the low energy days, the reality of living with someone who is profoundly disabled. If you can't handle inconsistency, this won't work.
I'm not looking for someone who needs me to be the main income. I will never be able to carry that weight. My body and brain simply cannot. If that's a dealbreaker, I understand….but I won't apologize for it.
My timeline is different. I will likely die before you. That's not drama….its reality. Chronic illness has a way of shortening the road. If we build a future, it may not be as long as you imagined. I need someone who can hold that truth without running from it.
Some days I won't be able to keep up. Some days I'll be irritable, exhausted, grieving the life I wanted. I need someone who can sit in the mess with me….not fix it, just... stay.
I will die before you do. And I need you to be okay with that….or at least brave enough to love me anyway.
If any of this scares you off? Good. You weren't meant to stay.
If it doesn't? Let's talk.
#RadicalHonesty #KinkAndConnection #DisabledAndDeserving #ChronicIllness
