❝ NAZLI SAYAR —

“I was Icarus, struck down by my sun and still dying to get closer. I was part wildfire, part wounded animal. Part sunlight, part slaughterhouse.” — 33 YEARS OLD. NATIVE. TASTING ROOM MANAGER AT KIRKLAND ESTATE WINERY AND VINEYARD.

[nazsayar]

❝ scattered cups of tea and the dregs of red wine staining the bottom of a glass, bitten lips, hot baths, dried tears on a pillow and open boxes of photographs; working overtime to avoid being alone, leaving texts on read and not answering the phone; gold jewelry, messy hair, forced smiles and vacant stares.

NAME: Nazli Sayar

NICKNAME(S): Naz

AGE: Thirty-three

RESIDENTIAL AREA: The Drive

OCCUPATION: Tasting Room Manager at Kirkland Estate Winery and Vineyard

LENGTH OF TIME IN VANCOUVER: Native, returned for 3 years

        BIOGRAPHY | CONNECTIONS | STATS | PINTEREST

basics.

BIRTHDAY: tbd bc i take zodiac signs too seriously to commit to anything yet

PLACE OF BIRTH: Vancouver, British Columbia

GENDER IDENTIFICATION: Cis Woman (she/her)

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Bisexual

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single

POSITIVE TRAITS: Capable and Empathetic

NEGATIVE TRAITS: Distancing and Haunted

family.

MOTHER: Neslihan Sayar

FATHER: Ishan Sayar

SIBLINGS: Defne Sayar (older sister, 34), Sanem Sayar (younger sister, 29), youngest sister (npc).

NIECES/NEPHEWS: tbd

OTHER: tbd

tldr.

although her family is originally from turkey, nazli was born and raised in the marpole neighborhood in south vancouver. her home life was neither good nor bad, but always falling somewhere in the gray between. 

her father left when she was six, heading off for better work except he never returned. despite the distance, her parents remained married on paper, and the longer he was gone the more her mother began to deteriorate. 

that left naz to help her grandparents around the house and look after her siblings, but the one bright spark was her next door neighbor, jake. 

(tw: death) what began as a solid friendship turned into young love, and the two of them were ultimately together for five years, going as far as to get engaged, before jake passed away in a climbing accident. 

losing him broke naz, and she inevitably skipped town when it all got to be too much. she stayed away for several years, avoiding the friends and family and spots around town that reminded her of him, until three years ago when she was persuaded home. 

now she works at the kirkland estate winery and vineyard as a manager in the tasting room, just passing the time while she tries to figure out how someone actually moves on with their life.

possible connections

childhood friends, co-workers at the winery, neighbors, family/friends of jake, the other three people who were out with him on the climb that day (future wc on the main), tinder dates, fwbs, etc. over the last three years since she’s moved home, maybe one relationship she had for however long in that timeframe before she self sabotaged and called it off, siblings (another future wc), cousins (must be of turkish descent), estranged friends she ha a falling out with after leaving town and cutting everyone out, friends she’s only met since coming home that don’t know much about what happened, etc.

[nazsayar]

❝ SILAS CODY —

for: @vancitystarters​

where: anywhere at all, get zany wid it 

capping at: ( 3/6. ) 

“Ayy, hatever the fuck that means, I’ll drink to it.”

—

“It means—” Actually, Nazli had no idea what point she’d been trying to make. Fortunately she never needed a legitimate reason or excuse to down another shot. “Nevermind.” With a clink of her tiny glass against his she threw the vodka back. “If you can tell a joke good enough to make me laugh I’ll buy next round.”

[nazsayar]

❝ MALACHI HOLMES —

status: open ( @vancitystarters​ ) location: wherever ur heart desires

“Anyone who says they’ve seen a ghost is straight up lying or conveniently forgetting to mention how they were on a buncha drugs.”

—

“Why do I get the feeling you either had a really shitty Halloween and are looking for a refund on your ghost tour experience, or have a bone to pick with your dealer for selling shitty product?”

[nazsayar]

❝ JACE EVANS —

CITY BREW PUB w/ @vancitystarters​

“Chocolate tequila? They really will make anything, won’t they?”

“Probably because dumb college co-eds will buy anything.” Then again, most people would argue so would she. Naz wasn’t all that picky when it came to what booze passed her lips. “It can’t be that bad, though. I mean... who doesn’t love chocolate and tequila? Maybe it’s the best of both worlds.”

[nazsayar]

❝ on the vancouver ghost tour with @valeriasoto​ —

A cloud of dust kicked up from the decrepit floorboards underneath her boots while Naz steered Val through the long abandoned room, arm in arm. “So assuming ghosts actually exist—” she was still a little torn on that possibility— “do you think they’re just floating orbs, or hazy blurs moving at the edge of your vision? Or do you think they’re no shit see through people?”

 Venturing toward the door of a cracked open closet she paused, just long enough to throw Val a smirk over the curve of her shoulder. “Do you think any of them are hot? I mean, if being fully alive one of your dealbreakers, or can I play cupid with Casper on your behalf?”

[nazsayar]

❝ SAWYER HARRIS —

starter for: @vancitystarters​ where: haunted hayride (medical tent), october 31st

“–like, I don’t know what they expected from a haunted maze. What did they think it was haunted by, corn?” Sawyer’s eyes rolled at the thought, her exasperation clear in her tone. “But, anyways, then the guy in the Jason mask pops out of the maze and totally scares the absolute shit out of the people behind me, and they just completely bulldoze past me, knock me to the ground, and basically trample me on the way out.” Hence, the scraped up hands and the bleeding knees, the former of which are extended palm up for the other to see, currently waiting to be tended to as she sat on the (quite uncomfortable) plastic chair of the medical tent. “They’re just lucky I didn’t get blood on this outfit, you wanna talk about scary.” Sawyer huffed. Her eyes caught sight of her hands once more, frowning at the stinging sensation as she lowered them to her lap. “But yeah, that’s my story. What’s yours?”

—

Nazli inspected the wounds from her own seat, and a wince tugged between her brows at the bloody sight. “Nothing so dramatic as that.” She had no tales of overly frightened crowds or stampedes in the middle of the darkened stalks. Just her own obliviousness and stupidity to blame for how she ended up in the med tent less than thirty minutes after arriving. 

“I was on the phone trying to figure out where my friends disappeared to and wasn’t paying enough attention.” Enter one apple core tossed to the ground from the food booths and two clumsy feet— the rest was sort of self-explanatory. “When I say I went down like a sack of bricks, I mean it.”

Quiet laughter chuffed out of Naz for a second. “Never thought I’d see the day when mostly eaten fruit almost took me to my grave.” No, she would’ve put her money on about a hundred other poor choices, but never that. “I may have to borrow a bit from your night, otherwise I’m in for a world of embarrassment when I admit what really happened.”

[nazsayar]

❝ JUDE MERCER —

It pulls a GENUINE chuckle out of him, all but dissipating the tension that had built up off the annoyance at his (ex-) date, and replacing it with RELIEF for being at least seated with another also by their lonesome. “Well, thank your shadow for sitting this one out, I’m indebted.” 

He relaxed back into his seat when the barrier came down sans the original stiffness he’d settled in with, looking over at his new companion as their chair began to ascend. “I’d DOUBT it. Few people I’ve met in my life as self-absorbed.” Though this whole episode might end up being a blessing in disguise, his chance to shake her. If she wasn’t waiting for him at the bottom of the wheel, that is. His brow raises, nodding contemplatively. “A fair negotiation. Alright, you’ve got yourself a DEAL — as long as you’re ready to make a run for it once we get down.” 

—

A small smile cut across her lips just as the Ferris Wheel set into motion, allowing the next pair of riders to board. “Let’s just call it an even trade, hmm?” He wasn’t the only one benefiting from their unexpected, impromptu ‘partnership’. Although, from the sound of it, perhaps the one benefiting more.

Eyebrows raised in way that fell somewhere between amused and baffled before she blurted, “Then why the fuck are you out on a date with her?” Not that it was any of her business. Naz just couldn’t wrap her head around intentionally wasting time with someone who only left misery in their wake. “You don’t have to answer that,” she reassured somewhat belatedly, “but luckily for you I have a pro membership card to the ‘duck and dodge’ club.”

Hell, she’d spent the last nine or so years actively going out of her way to avoid situations she’d rather not deal with. At one point, traveling as far as Toronto. For five whole years.

If anybody could assist in making it back off the ride without detection it was probably her. “I’m Nazli, by the way.” Might as well introduce themselves if they were about to become true partners in crime, right? “And you... own the Bone and Rattle?” She’d been in more than a few times, primarily on those nights she wanted to lose herself in a bottle in peace. 

“Or at least I think I’ve seen you in there before.” It’s the whole reason why she bartered for free drinks in the first place.

[nazsayar]

❝ ISLA CHASTAIN —

She didn’t know- Isla’s mouth opened a bit to insist she must know but closed it shortly after. She knew better than that- matters of the heart were hardly ever as simply as you wanted them to be, and God did Nazli have a complicated hand she was dealing with. “But you care about him.” Isla stated puffing her cheeks out and grabbing the bottle of vodka and pouring them each a drink she topped with mostly orange juice. She was properly drunk by this point, her chin rested in her palm as she sipped and sighed. “You care about what he’s done for you. What that means to you-” Isla suggested, “It doesn’t matter what’s not been said because what matters is between the lines. Am I right?” She asked with a frown knowing this sort of thing was already complicated enough, but tossing in the fact that Nick was Angelia’s ex and things suddenly became far more complicated and potentially devastating. “Liking the potential of someone isn’t really liking them, Naz. It’s not real.” Isla pointed out, “There are a million other ways to not be alone.” Isla softened reaching across and grabbing her friends hand. “You’re gorgeous and there are endless people in this city who would line up at a chance to keep you company.” People that weren’t tangled with Angelia, or any of their friends for that matter. “Is there anyone else you’ve seen between Nick?” Isla asked almost hopeful that there was someone else that Naz could fall into if it meant healing in her own way. “Stop it.” Isla said her words slurring only slightly, “I can forgive so much and understand a lot but I can’t let you talk about yourself this way, Nazli.” Isla huffed and pulled a muffin in half sliding half to Nazli, “How you feel matters. How you handled things with Kira sucks but how you feel matters you owe it to yourself and to your sister to reflect on it and find a better way to explain to her your feelings.” Isla insisted, “As for Angelia, you didn’t know at first.” She stressed, “But you know now and I can’t say what is the best thing to do here but you can’t lie to her. She wouldn’t lie to you.” Isla shook her head and slipped her hand around Nazli’s, “I’m very drunk Nazli so please hear me when I say that there is no scenario in which our lives are better without you home. You belong here. I can’t- I don’t ever want to imagine you leaving again. I love you. ” Isla assured and patted her hand, “Also you’re gonna stay the night. You can cuddle with Nimah and me.” Isla said as she ambled to pour them both some chilled water while searching for the asprin they’d undoubtedly need.

— THE END.

[nazsayar]

❝ SANEM SAYAR —

Sanem still felt awful for saying those things the way that she had. Her older sister hadn’t deserved that callousness from Sanem and so she still was pretty apologetic. For now though she nodded and finally reached forward, grasping the other’s hand gently. “I don’t blame you Naz, no one does,” she hoped the other could believe that because it was absolutely true. She and Kiraz may have been surprised by the extent of Naz’ reaction but that didn’t mean they hated her or something. “We’re sisters…that matters more than anything,” and they all knew this for one solid reason–they had been there for one another more times in their childhood than anyone else.

That was why she had to smile hesitantly at Nazli before wondering for yet another moment if there was something her sister wasn’t saying and if there was anything she could do or say to convince Naz of being honest with her. “I know it goes both ways…” she murmured as she continued looking back at her big sister, aware of how that gaze was meant to make her cower and admit to whatever was bothering her. 

The admittance of Nazli’s conversation with Nolan didn’t make her wary of anything–she knew her sister had been on speaking terms with the other man and was glad that despite everything with how Sanem and he had begun their relationship, she didn’t suddenly decide to be angry with him as well. “It was…nothing, honestly. Just stuff from the night of the blackout. I promise it’s all trivial.” But it wasn’t and yet in the grand scheme of everything her older sister and her younger sister were dealing with–it really was insignificant. Much like how Sanem felt. Irrespective of that, she managed to tug her sister close for a hug. “I promise you don’t need to worry–maybe I’ll mention it another time. But I promised to meet someone on the other deck so I’ve got to go..I’ll see you later though?” And with that parting statement, she quickly made her way to the other deck, hoping that her sister didn’t realize that she really was keeping something from her. 

FIN.

[nazsayar]

❝ at the haunted maze with @asrabxt —

Nazli didn’t typically consider herself someone who spooked easily, but she drew a semi-hard limit at dead lumberjacks that popped out of the darkened stalks ripping a chainsaw in front of her face. After a ten foot jump into the air she’d be mortified about later she back pedaled straight into the nearest body not doused in fake blood. 

It was only when she glanced up and locked eyes on a blessedly familiar face that she breathed a sigh of almost relief. “We’re going to pretend this never happened, but— I think it’s my turn to borrow you.”

[nazsayar]

❝ at horror night with @jjaspr —  

“Excuse me—” Nazli hissed, her fingers snagging in a vice like grip above Jasper’s elbow in an effort to reign him the fuck in. “You cannot just slink off into the night to go scare a bunch of idiot teenagers at every other jump scare.” Eyes full of mock disapproval speared him with a glare. “Not without at least telling me first so that I can follow behind and film.”

[nazsayar]

❝ MATTHEW SULLIVAN —

─── starter for @vancitystarters​ / capping at 4 replies

SAMHAIN FESTIVAL, SULLY’S TAVERN ─── Large beer mug in hand full of mead, Matt offered it with a grin. “Have you tried it yet?” The live music was going strong, people were dancing and celebrating the Celtic New Year with mead and feasts of food. It was loud inside, there was a lot going on outside as well in the back lot with the party tents up. Matt leaned in a bit to be heard over the noise, “it comes ‘round once a year. Enjoy.” The sweetish drink was from an ancient Celtic recipe and something Matt had ordered in masses for the festivities. Since his grandfather had opened the tavern long before Matt had been born the Samhain Festival had been an annual thing, and since he had taken over he’d tried his best to keep the traditions alive. Especially since they’d always been so popular. “Want to join me outside for some fresh air for a bit?”

—

“No—” not this year at least; she’d indulged throughout many others— “but since when have you known me to turn down a drink, Sully?” Never. That’s when. Naz swiped the large stein from his hands with a crooked grin and knocked back that first sip. A little sweet compared to her usual vice of choice, but she’d take it. 

Like he said... Samhain only came around once a year. When in Rome and all of that.

She somehow managed to nod throughout her next sip without pausing or spilling a drop, and then the pair eased their way outside where it was only somewhat less of a circus. Still, Naz took a deep, cleansing breath of the chilled evening air, feeling the breeze lick over flushed cheeks, before her eyes cut back. “So.” Her hip gently knocked against his side. “How’ve you been?”

“Staying out of more trouble than me, I hope.”

[nazsayar]

❝ JUDE MERCER —

⌊ anyone  |  fall harvest carnival ⌋  @vancitystarters ​

He’s chanting expletives under his breath because this is a family-friendly event and he still has at least THAT much self-control left; regardless of how short the queue has become and the fact that for whatever reason, the very person who’d tasked him with holding their place in line was STILL not back from getting her ‘desperately-needed’ corndog. Jude isn’t sure why he agreed to holding their spot while she was gone — isn’t fully sure why he’s here to BEGIN WITH, actually — but by the time he finally decides to just abandon ship and suffer his absent companion’s ire, he’s already getting herded onto the ride with the person behind him. There’s no turning back now. Jude’s expression is guilty as he takes his place, glancing back at the queue as if he could figure out if he’d stolen someone else’s ride partner. All in all — FAR from ideal.

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he mutters, now that the necessity against coarse language has been rendered obsolete. His tone is both irritated AND apologetic — if the other did want to board with someone else, it would probably take another half hour wait in line. “Hope I haven’t separated you from a friend or date or something. I was waiting for someone to get back.” He rubs a hand over his face. “With their fucking corndog.”

—

“Nothing to be sorry for, really.” The edge of her mouth pressed toward what might’ve been the hint of a smirk. “It was either you or my shadow.” With one sister already gone off with her boyfriend and the other avoiding the rides due to her delicate ‘condition’ Naz was essentially on her own. And that was fine - she typically thrived on her own - but she wouldn’t complain about the company.

As the Ferris Wheel bar clanged into place across their laps she settled in for the ride, none too fussed over whether or not he minded the intrusion. Perhaps she should’ve been, but the thought never even crossed her mind. “I really hope they were at least bringing you a corndog back, too,” Naz quipped offhandedly, “but if not I’ll happily trade you some carnival food for a round of free drinks the next time I stop through.”

[nazsayar]

Do you ever feel remorse for your actions?

"Okay, c’mon now. I get that sometimes I can be a selfish bitch but that doesn’t make me heartless.”

[nazsayar]

Do you want kids?

"I... used to. Now I’m not so sure. Maybe I think it’d just be nice to want to want kids and feel as if I’d actually be a decent enough mom to deserve having them. Or to feel like a real future, kids or not, is something even remotely still in the cards.”

[nazsayar]

What’s one thing you regret?

"Just one thing? Way to ask an impossible to answer question. I don’t know. I definitely regret the way I spoke to Kiraz a few weeks ago. Sometimes I regret letting grief and fear run me out of town when staying might have— well, I guess I’ll never know now so it doesn’t even matter. I regret letting my friends down. I regret lying to Ang for so long. I regret a lot of things, okay? Can we just leave it at that?” - featuring @kirazsayar and @angeliaparedes

[nazsayar]

What was something you realized you loved later in life?

“Uh. Maybe traveling? And maybe Josh. Maybe that part of me loved him more than just a friend all along. Not that I’ve done much of it, I’ve only ever really gone to Toronto and back, but it was nice to be somewhere for awhile where nobody knew me or looked at me like some sad little lost girl whose fiancé died.” - featuring @joshlincoln