*This article has nothing to do with degradation play.*
Words can hurt, they can heal, and they can sustain. Words from your lips mean more than you could possibly realize. Your words can turn them on and turn them off. From āgood morningā to a declaration of love, each word carries the weight of your character.
All humans slip or fuck up. Sometimes we say things that are hurtful in the heat of a charged moment. That is why it is important to work on our own inner peace, self control, and ability to remain calm in stressful moments.
As a Dominant, we set the communications standard in the dynamic. We are held to a higher standard through the eyes of your submissive as we should be. Theyāve already submitted to you, so they regard you as someone theyāve deemed worthy of their trust.
Do not ever use your words as a weapon with someone you love or care for.
That is a small sample listing of things that can inflict irreparable damage.
Your words to them are from the Gospel of Dom. They can pierce and sink someoneās very soul. Words are wind and can be a gentle summer breeze, but sometimes, that wind can also be a tornado.
So, next time you feel frustrated or upset and you donāt think you have a grip on your self control enough to avoid saying something hurtful or stupid; take a deep breath, tell them everything is ok, but you need a moment and that you love them, and walk away. If you are texting, tell them you need a couple of minutes. Give an exact amount of time you think youāll need so you do not leave them wondering if youāre coming back. Never leave them wondering if youāre coming back. Even in a charged moment, reassure them because thatās your damn job.
When youāre ready to communicate calmly, deliberately, and with sensitive and open compassion, then return to the conversation. Even if they are still ramped up, it is YOU who needs to have themselves under control. They need to see you have control over yourself so that they know you can handle having control over them.
Your words can lift them up on high, melt their heart, and nourish their soul. Your words can devastate, create hate, and destroy trust. Your words matter. Treat your words as seeds for emotional and spiritual growth and not ammo.
Obviously this isnāt meant to be an all inclusive article covering this topic. Keep learning, reading, and growing.
