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Janaina Medeiros
PR's Tumblrdome
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DEAR READER
hello vonnie
NASA
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Product Placement
styofa doing anything
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blake kathryn
Kiana Khansmith
Today's Document
trying on a metaphor
titsay
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taylor price
RMH
pixel skylines
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@nerdymuffinbonkcloud
reblog if you love ao3 exactly how it is and you don’t want it to “update” or change in any way♡
ao3 is not changing anything by the way! some people just want them to change for some reason. my guess is that these people just don't understand how the site works and refuse to actually learn how it works, so they blame the site because it's easier for them that way.
I've survived my first day on Tumblr
Achievements:
Don't shoot! I'm friendly!: Prove you're not a bot
AI dismemberment: Disable algorithm settings
Friends?: Gained a mutual
I recognize you: Follow someone you know from r/Tumblr
MY EYES!: Change the site palette
Great Idea: Reblog a post
They love me: Have a post reblogged
Oh boy oh boy you're gonna get a Rare achievement for this one
Containment Breach
I feel like I need to share this because idk if Europeans are familiar with the presence of Aldi in the US, but at least especially in my area they’ve been growing a lot recently. Like Aldi bought out some local failing grocery chains where I live (Louisiana) and have opened Aldis in all these somewhat rural communities and small towns, which for the record I’m fine with
But as a result of this they are advertising a lot more in my area and also in many cases, the people in these areas have never been confronted with Aldi or any European grocery store. So the ads that Aldi is pushing out to its new US customer base feature a cowboy shopping at Aldi who is explaining to new Aldi customers how Aldi works. Like this cowboy is explaining you gotta put a quarter in the shopping cart and why there are very little name brands. A cowboy is how they want to reach their American customer base. They gave us a cowboy
Here he is, the Aldi Cowboy
Thank god they decided to make more
Wow
Dolly Parton has really been hard at work
But In doing so…she created her biggest enemy…Jolene
World Heritage Post
I will not elaborate.
@sergle is correct
let's put Scooby and the gang in a genuine horror movie situation, i wanna see what these freaks are truly capable of
"didn't they already do this with—" no. put them in a slasher film. put them in a BLOODBATH. put this van full of weirdoes in a Texas Chainsaw Massacre scenario i have FAITH in them
THEY'D DO WELL IN SAW
okay I'm thinking about this
not Saw specifically but a slasher with a legit body count. Summer camp slashers are overplayed but I think it really works because it's the type of thing the Scooby gang WOULD get caught up in.
like some of the counselors didn't show up (got got) so the head counselor calls his younger cousin to see if him and his friends can fill in last minute. They show up and they're a bunch of nerds, one of them even has an anxiety dog, and they don't have a big role at first. It seems like the movie is setting them up as cannon fodder.
and then the deaths start and suddenly the nerds are locked the fuck in. The little one with the glasses actually fixed the phone line and is taking stock of all their supplies in case the vehicles go out. The counselor's cousin who seemed like a himbo has set up a perimeter and made makeshift alarms for all the doors and windows, knows all the entry points. The anxious one and his dog are keeping the mood up with the snacks and activities that were supposed to be for the kids, making sure nobody panics and starts making dumb decisions. Somebody tried to grab the redhead and she flipped him over and had him zip-tied before anybody noticed. Weren't they a D&D group or something? What is happening???
Fuck the slasher movie just effectively becomes Home Alone but with Four Kevin McAllisters
Bro's fucked.
art by Daviddv1202
at one point the kid with the anxiety dog says, "man, why does this keep happening? this is, like, the eighth time thid year!"
it's barely June. abruptly all the normal councilors understand a) why he has an anxiety dog, and b) why the dog has anxiety too.
The Centaurs, whenever someone from the press asks one of them to describe Ilya Rozanov.
does his fine plumage impress you?
Female Dwarves - With or without beards?
With beards
Without beard
Child Dwarves - With or without beards?
With beards
Without beards
Baby Dwarves - With or without beards?
With beards
Without beards
They shed their baby beards to make room for their adult beards. Like with baby teeth.
‘twas the night before the vampire lestat when all through the graves, the creatures were stirring they even were at raves. the tour bus was driving through the streets with care in hopes that the vampire lestat soon would be there
do u have a vibrator in ur pants or is ur penis just so scared
he’s tryin his best okay
the main post is getting giant and has so many threads on it already, but the idea of the first time shane has a contact reaction being AFTER ILYA KNOWS ABOUT THE ALLERGIES AND HAS TRIED SO HARD TO KEEP HIS HOUSE SAFE
during the literal YEARS of not knowing he could potentially kill shane? NO
THE ALLERGIES WAITED UNTIL HE FELT SAFE
he had fries or something while he was out at a bar with the team and didn't think about it because he didn't order them and was just absentmindedly grazing from the plate that got shared, but he goes home to shane, kiss kiss, starting to strip, and then shane just *increasingly frequent pauses to try and clear his throat* *realization about what's happening*
and after the terror is over and shane has been treated and is okay again, ilya is just ??? fucking SERIOUSly??? years and years of lucky breaks and it's a few random fucking fries cooked in peanut oil that do it??? what the FUCK
GOD post-outing but pre-knowing about shane's allergies, the team just assumes oh?? the bar must have said something homophobic or something??? cap must have been the only one who heard it?? and they're now like well FUCK that place >:( and start refusing to go there, too.
only to find out later it's because ilya blames it for making his kisses deadly to boyfriends with peanut allergies
RODNEY NOOOOOOO
rodney’s wife over here watching her husband of thirty years go through a one-sided breakup just like “babe. babe the bar is still doing fine this isn’t affecting our bottom line and i’m SURE it’s just a coincidence and boodram was having a bad day.” but rodney can’t and won’t hear it. the centaurs hate him, personally, and he is inconsolable about it.
fucking TEARS IN MY EYES laughing at this but also filled with so much real sympathy for this fake man.
i'm just picturing a long montage of rodney just fucking. looking at the pictures and sighing. looking out the window and sighing. looking at the table the cens usually sit at and sighing.
and meanwhile tanya is just, "?? why are you taking this harder than when the kids left for college??"
#heated rivalry#shallergies#the kicker is that if ANYONE talked about ANYTHING rodney would have anything peanut out of that bar IMMEDIATELY#GONE#GONE FROM HIS BAR#he would personally spit on every peanut he sees for the rest of his life if it would mean the return of his boys </3#GOD#after shane is in ottawa someone in passing mentions the bar#and it's kind of wistful but they're like 'good riddance for being shitty to cap though'#and ilya is just ?? 'what?? what are you talking about?'#'y-you hate that bar?'#'yes is bad place.'#'??? be-because?? someone said something shitty to you?'#'what? no? they made me poison hollander.'#shane from the side: 'what??? are you talking about???'#'the time i kissed you and you went into shock when you were visiting. is because i was at the bar and something had peanuts i didn't know.#the rest of the team: '...THAT'S WHY WE STOPPED GOING TO-'#and now shane is just 'ilya you can't swear off a bar forever because you accidentally cross-contaminated me'#'can and am and will hollander. no forgiveness.'#'ilya they didn't even fucking know. you're being ridiculous.'#now everyone on the team who has given rodney the cold shoulder is just 'o-oh no. oh god. oh fuck.'#them returning to the bar with a gift basket and having to be like 'soooo due to a misunderstanding and also peanuts-'#pffft oh my GOD roddy's bar ends up becoming one of the most allergy-safe bars in ottawa after this XD#rodney becomes fucking MILITANT about it#it takes like six times of the team going there and reporting back before ilya decides to trust it again#and rodney nearly sheds a tear the day it finally happens#meanwhile tanya is just 'you really couldn't have just like. bought a mustang or something?? if you were going to do the late life crisis?' (via op)
pen you can’t keep doing this to me you can’t keep dragging me into fandoms i’m not in and making me emotionally invested in characters who aren’t even in the source material! please i have a family!
IF HE HAD TO BE OTTAWANDA TO KEEP THE CENS AT HIS BAR, HE WOULD BE OTTAWANDA TO KEEP THE CENS AT HIS BAR.
i also love the idea of this older man who wasn't a homophobe but also wasn't like. an active outspoken queer ally because it just didn't occur to him as something to be. who is now AGGRESSIVELY inclusive in this bar. if you don't like it? get OUT. he lost the cens once, and it will NOT happen again. not on his watch! not while he lives!!! for every shitty comment, five new rainbow flags go up!! keep pushing him!!!
and the kids aren't, like...judging. but they are going to tanya and being like, "uuuuh, mom? is dad...trying to come out? in like. a really weird sideways way?"
and tanya just *heavy sigh* "honey i WISH it was that simple."
oh my GOD after the cens win their first cup, they take it to the bar and let rodney take a picture with it and the team.
he fucking CRIES from joy.
Dean Winchester was Castiels forbidden fruit
if dogs could use the internet and talk their incel communities would definitely have some insane shit to say about spaying and neutering [remembers this isn't normal to think about] the weather is warmer lately did anyone notice that
u think dogs would do misogyny? dogs??
just trust me i'm an empath
Yurifies your trolley problem <3
really among the most compelling elements of shallergies for me is the "you can't have what other people get without consequences, and the easiest path to processing that is just telling yourself you don't want it, and control is not only important: it's ESSENTIAL for you to be okay" of it all when it comes to shane
there is obviously angst in it, too, but shane putting mangoes and gay sex in the same mental category of "bad for me, but i want it" is SO goddamn funny to me
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