heartbreak is the national anthem

ella; twenty-6 semi-selective indie

[conscientes]

the shift of how upset she'd been to what she feels now is almost ironic. she knows she was upset, she knows she'd never been that angry, she remembers how horrible it felt to keep planning a wedding without her best friend by her side yet it all feels as if they were emotions that belonged to someone else because all ximena feels as he stands before her is gratitude. those two words would have sufficed, quite frankly she's sure it was all she needed but he keeps talking and it's as bricks hit her stomach.

she opens her mouth to protest but no sound comes out. she doesn't quite know what to say except blink at him with uncertainty radiating from her gaze. her love for peter. something that no longer feels as familiar but rather this strange concept that she's trying to understand, the meaning behind love and being in love. she knows she feels the former for her fiance but it's the later that's become tricky. eventually, she shakes her head at him, taking a step back as she tries to maintain her composure.

"kaan, please, not this again," she whispers.

[newrcmvntics]

he's acutely aware that he's testing boundaries. kaan should possess the wisdom to steer clear of ximena's doorstep, abstaining from dissuading her from proceeding with her wedding. a ceremony he had initially pledged to assist her with, now consumed by thoughts of halting it altogether. it might be an immature and self-indulgent impulse, but isn't that what love often entails?

a surge of panic courses through him the moment she swings the door open. he finds himself rendered speechless, grappling with the decision to either be candid or to offer a shallow apology and depart. the emotion emanating from her is palpable—anger, or perhaps a profound disappointment? it's become a blur to him. he pauses for a moment, contemplating the most prudent course of action. perhaps it's best to let her proceed, but what if she harbors the same reservations? what if she feels the same way?

"i understand, and i'm genuinely sorry, but i can't stand by and watch you marry him," he begins, exhaling deeply. "at least not without us having a conversation. if, after this discussion, you still choose him, then i'll respect your decision."

[conscientes]

"yeah," he agrees unsure of how to feel about it. he knows she means it, that despite everything they've been through, she wishes him well because it's exactly what he wants for her but he's spent so long trying to reclaim his life after her exit that he's not sure where this leaves them. "just a few, you know? life being life," he suggests, "what about you? are you back visiting?"

he doesn't miss the slight shift in her voice though there's not much he can do about it anymore. he shakes his head in disagreement, the notion of another lifetime flashing before him as he feels the comfort of what used to be envelop him for a fleeting moment. "it was totally not!" he protests through a hearty laugh. it was definitely his fault but he swore he'd never stray from his answer of being innocent. "thanks," he nods, "it's working pretty well though it should considering how much it cost us."

[newrcmvntics]

ceren listened to him speak, her heart heavy with a mixture of emotions. it was a bittersweet reunion, seeing him again after all this time. she could sense his uncertainty, his struggle to find his footing in this newfound interaction. she knew he understood her well-wishes, but there was an unspoken question hanging in the air. "no, well, for now, it's a permanent move. my mom needed the company but who knows in the future." the words 'give me a reason to stay' got stuck in her throat.

"sure, nico whatever you say," she replied, a hint of laughter in her voice. she despised how effortlessly she slipped back into their familiar banter, as though no time had elapsed, as though she hadn't shattered everything. her smile wavered when the word 'us' reached her ears. frantically, she searched for an excuse, but her racing heartbeat served as a harsh reminder that her worst fear might become a dreadful reality—a fear she had, quite selfishly, never truly contemplated. "oh, do you happen to have a roommate?" she inquired, desperately hoping for an affirmative response.

[conscientes]

its supposed to be the happiest day of her life. she's supposed to be counting down the days until she walks down the aisle and says "i do". she's supposed to be glowing and beaming, filled with whatever joy it is bride's feel right before their wedding. she should be feeling all these things and yet what she feels the most is dread, an unsettling notion creeping over her with what she's sure are signs from the universe telling her not to go through with it but ximena only double down on her decision despite everything.

if she were being honest with herself, she'd recognize why and when this unease began. kaan's question ringing in her mind ever since, unable to shake off how much she struggled to answer. it's just wedding day jitters, right? because she wouldn't be marrying someone she doesn't love. she wouldn't have said yes otherwise. she knows she wouldn't have or at least, she was sure of it until pretty recently. there's a struggle between real feelings and playing it safe, ximena not quite sure where she's landed at. the only thing she is certain of is how much easier this all was when kaan was around.

the knock on her door startles her but it's the voice behind it that causes her to pause as she sits up on her couch and listens to him. she's unsure of what to do as her heart races and she feels an impulse to rush to the door, forgetting that she was upset with him in the first place. instead, she waits for a moment, hesitating on what decision to make before she realizes that she had made one as her hand turns the knob to open the door.

[newrcmvntics]

kaan stood outside ximena's door, his heart pounding as he pondered the complexity of the situation. over the years, their friendship had been unwavering, a bond that had weathered the highs and lows of life. he'd always been the carefree playboy, never one to settle down, while she had chosen a different path leading to her impending marriage. the realization that he was in love with her had hit him like a bolt of lightning on the eve of her wedding.

perhaps his timing for this realization was selfish, considering it was meant to be the happiest time of her life. he had contemplated whether these emotions were merely a fleeting response to the fear of losing a friend. however, they ran deeper than that, and he regretfully acknowledged how he had taken them for granted.

hoping she would open the door, he gathered his courage and began to speak. "i'm sorry," he started, understanding that a simple apology might not suffice. "i know i've been acting poorly lately, and you've reminded me countless times of your love for peter, but…" he hesitated, uncertain whether his next words would help or worsen the situation. "please don't marry him."

[conscientes]

his lips purse together into a tight smile though it's kind and warm, nico trying his best to be friendly and encouraging. it is nice to see her though it comes with a mixture of other feelings, ones he thought he'd moved past but there's something about her that still sparks something in him, probably always will. "glad to hear that," he nods softly. it takes him a second to answer her question, how is he supposed to answer that anyway? "i've been good. new house, new job, new ..." he trails off, not sure how to end it. new love is what he's thinking but he's not quite sure how to tell her that. "a lot of new changes," he eventually finishes with.

he tries to match the light radiating from her but it doesn't quite reach his eyes and the smile feels almost forced. he knows he's not doing anything wrong but there's still something about it that makes him feel almost uncomfortable, as if he was doing something he shouldn't. "thanks," he answers as he sets back the other box, taking the suggestion. "uh, yeah," he nods, "something like that." her reminder suddenly sends him back to a different lifetime, washing away some of the tension as he lets out a genuine laugh. "i promise i've gotten much better though i still argue that that was more of a faulty stove than it was human error."

[newrcmvntics]

her heart flutters as she meets nico's warm smile, a mixture of emotions swirling within her. seeing him again is like stepping into a familiar, yet slightly unsettling, territory. there's an undeniable connection that time hasn't dulled, a spark that still lingers beneath the surface. "glad to hear that," ceren replies, her voice steady, though her curiosity is piqued by his hesitance. she treads carefully, not wanting to pry too deeply into his personal life. "sounds like you've had quite a few changes," she observes, aiming for a light, neutral tone.

there's a subtle discrepancy between his smile and his eyes, a hint of something unspoken. it leaves ceren feeling a touch uneasy as if she's glimpsing a side of him he's chosen not to reveal. "you're welcome," she says, her warmth tinged with a note of uncertainty. as he brings up their past cooking mishap, genuine laughter bubbles up within her. "ah, right," she chuckles, swept up in a wave of nostalgia. "i'd have you know that the stove was working perfectly." her tone is playful, an attempt to keep the conversation comfortable and lighthearted, masking the deeper currents of emotion swirling within her. "i hope your new stove is working perfectly, tho."

[newrcmvntics]

just 24 hours remained before ximena would commit her life to another man. inwardly, he wrestled with a blend of emotions. while he should be genuinely thrilled for his best friend's impending happiness, a more profound sentiment had recently unveiled itself – his love for ximena. these newfound feelings were as genuine as they were perplexing, and it was a source of frustration for him. he faced a pivotal decision: lay bare his emotions or suppress them and witness her marriage. over the past few weeks, his inner turmoil had driven him to contemplate various ways to disrupt the wedding. however, their friendship had taken a severe blow during her bachelorette party, and they hadn't communicated since. regardless of the path he chose, he was determined to initiate a conversation with her and heal the rift between them. standing outside her door, kaan felt uncertain about whether she would welcome him. he knocked gently, his voice filled with a mixture of regret and longing, "i understand you're still upset with me. i respect your choice if you'd rather not talk, but there's something i need to share with you. whether or not you open the door, i'll say it, but i truly hope to see you."

@conscientes

[conscientes]

"i'll go get the pasta," nico chuckles lightly as he gives alexis' hand a gentle squeeze before letting go and leaving his girlfriend in the produce section. the decision to make last minute penne rosa sounded promising until they realized they were missing most of the key ingredients to do so leaving them with the option of either ordering takeout or an impromptu grocery shopping trip.

except now he's stuck in aisle nine trying to figure out which penne to get. a sigh leaves his lips as he holds two different boxes in his hands, eyeing each back and forth as if the stakes were too high for him to make the wrong decision. he's about to pull his phone from his pocket to send a picture of both options to alexis to have her pick as a tap stops him and he turns expecting to see her and instead meeting ceren's eyes. "oh!" he all but gasps, ceren being the last person he expected to run into, "hey, ceren! i didn't expect to see you here." he offers her a nervous laugh, suddenly thrown off by the wave of emotions of seeing her again.

[newrcmvntics]

ceren's mind flashed back to their history together as she stood there in the grocery store aisle. the memories of their time as a couple and the painful breakup came rushing back. she couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for the choices she had made back then. nico's nervousness was palpable, and she could tell he was also wrestling with emotions from their shared past. "i've been… okay," she replied with a small, rueful smile, trying to keep her answer neutral. she didn't want to burden him with the weight of their past mistakes in such a public setting. "what about you?"

"i'd choose this one," she remarked, indicating one of the boxes, her warm smile radiating. though bidding farewell and resuming her shopping would have been the sensible choice, she found herself lingering in the moment. "cooking tonight?" she chuckled softly, aware of the absurdity of her question. "i trust you won't repeat the pasta incident. i'm still puzzled by how you managed that," she added.

[newrcmvntics]

the lingering unease of returning home proved inescapable for ceren. having been away from this town for so long, it served as a poignant reminder of all she had lost – her brother and nico. despite her best efforts to move beyond these painful memories, therapy's assistance notwithstanding, being back only resurfaced those emotional wounds. her mother had devised a scheme to ease her reintegration by sending her to the store, but ceren detested it. the piercing gazes and hushed conversations of onlookers were unbearable. she couldn't blame them; she had brought this scrutiny upon herself. ceren had adroitly avoided encountering nico, although a part of her earnestly yearned for a chance to speak with him, harboring a naive hope that reconciliation might be possible. her mixed emotions materialized as she turned into one of the store's aisles and beheld a remarkably familiar silhouette. the impulse to turn and retreat was overwhelming, yet instead, she mustered the courage to approach him and gently tapped his shoulder. "hey" she greeted with a coy smile.

@conscientes

[newrcmvntics]

WITH : nico alves ( @conscientes​ )

“hey,” she knocks lightly on the door before stepping in. it had been an impulsive decision to come but she couldn’t leave without saying goodbye to nico. “sorry for coming unannounced, i just wanted to say goodbye.” in all honesty, ceren didn’t think his mother would let her in but even if her former mother-in-law gave her a dirty look, she didn’t protest. “the funeral was yesterday and i’m leaving today.”

[newrcmvntics]

atlas & ellis

"yeah,” she scoffs, “the proudest.” the sarcasm evident though she’s can’t quite tell if it’s meant as a dig for her lack of one or how disappointed he’d probably be in her if he were actually around. it doesn’t end up mattering either way, as far as she’s concerned daddy dearest is simply one half of the reason why she’s around and that’s about it. “really, now?” she taunts with a smile, “that is such news to me. i would have guessed you had little minions running around that would tell you what to say.” her gaze narrows on him and she waits for whatever his next move is with this game she has no interest in playing. “and i’m genuinely not interested in answering that,” she shoots back, “go look at a tabloid magazine if you really want to find out.” she huffs, rolling her eyes at his response before taking a step closer to him, a hand setting on his chest as she taps a finger against him. “a. i would need a tetanus shot for that, b. what exactly is so damn irresistible about you? and c. moonlighting at a strip club sounds more exciting than spending time with you,” she smiles. 

.

her taunting words elicit a playful glint in his eyes. "minions, huh?" he muses, pretending to ponder the idea. "perhaps i should hire a few to keep me from interacting with you." he meets her narrowed gaze with an amused expression, refusing to let her intimidation affect him. he leans in closer, his tone filled with a hint of mischief. "unless you prefer direct contact with me.” he winks at her. her refusal to answer his question doesn't faze him; if anything, it only fuels his curiosity further. "tabloid magazines, you say?" he responds, his voice laced with mock surprise. "well, i suppose i could take a quick peek, just for research purposes, of course." he smirks, his eyes locked with hers, relishing in the game they're playing. as her hand rests on his chest, he feels a surge of electricity pass between them. her tapping finger only adds to the charged atmosphere. he leans in, his voice a low murmur against her ear. "a tetanus shot, huh?" he muses, a playful glimmer in his eyes. "i promise you, darling, i'm more electrifying than rusty metal." he leans back slightly, his smirk growing wider."ah, irresistible?" he muses, his voice carrying a hint of arrogance. "well, where do i begin? is it the charm, the wit, or perhaps the enigma that surrounds me?" he chuckles softly, the sound tinged with self-assuredness. "but strip clubs, huh? well, if that's what excites you, who am i to stand in the way of your adventurous spirit?" he tilts his head, his eyes sparkling mischievously.

[newrcmvntics]

louisa & mikel

"you know, i remember saying that once too and i wasn’t. i ended up with a concussion,” she points out as a matter of fact. there’s a sad smile on her face as she thinks back to that night and what it meant, how it changed their entire trajectory and despite the injury then and the heartbreak now, she wouldn’t change anything about how that night unfolded. “i’m sure you’ll be okay,” she takes a brief pause before adding,” but it’s better to be safe than sorry. just make sure you don’t stay alone, at least for the next twenty-four hours.” she knows he’s trying to ease that worry and the irony lies in the fact that it only bubbles that worry inside her even more. she nods softly, eyes locked on the gaze that once made up her world. the expression that stares back at her is one she feels in her bones, it’s heavy enough that she has to break away, dropping her gaze down to the ground. “yeah, i get that,” she whispers.

there’s a dry laugh that leaves her lips as she fidgets with her thumbs. heighten emotions mixed with alcohol never did fare well for her when it came to staying out of trouble. it usually enabled reckless decisions and a need to self-sabotage. though it doesn’t mean she didn’t appreciate his reminder any less knowing that despite everything, he still wanted her to be safe. his touch is unexpected and it freezes her for a moment. she knows there’s nothing to it other than him trying to reassure her but nonetheless, it still causes her heart to beat a little faster. she swallows dry, trying to keep any and all emotions at bay before looking back at him. “i think i’ve had more than an eventful night, i’m actually going to head home.” there’s a weak smile on her face as she finishes that sentence in her head, and cry. she nods once again before her focus shifts back to the point of injury trying to determine how bad it actually is. “do you want me to call them” she offers, “i just—you shouldn’t be left alone. i can wait at the doorway for your friend to come if you don’t want me here but you’re still bleeding, mikel.” she knows how it sounds, an excuse for her to stick around and as much as she doesn’t want to leave him out of selfish reasons, she truly doesn’t want him to be alone just in case of anything. she’d never forgive herself if something happened to him. 

.

mikel listens to her words, his gaze fixed on her as she speaks. memories flicker in his mind, the weight of past mistakes and regrets resurfacing. he understands the pain behind her sad smile, the profound impact that night had on their lives. it's a bittersweet realization, knowing that their paths diverged. “i know but i also i know you are way more stubborn than i am.” he’s unsure if it’s a joke, maybe he really suffered a concussion that was even affecting his sense of humor.  the weight of her gaze on him brings forth emotions he thought he had buried, but he remains composed, trying to be the steady presence she needs.

he takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself despite the discomfort. mikel's gaze lingers on her face, his heart torn between wanting her to stay and the realization that they need their own space to heal.  "as much as i appreciate your concern, you don't have to stay. i'll be alright. it's my own fault for getting involved." his voice carries a tinge of self-blame, knowing that he put himself in harm's way. he uses his own shirt as a way to stop the bleeding from his nose. mikel knows that louisa won’t leave that easily, he can see it in her eyes and it kills him to see her this worried. “can you call elyse?” he finally says, reaching to his pocket to give her his phone. “she’s in town and she can come and pick me up.” 

[newrcmvntics]

louisa & mikel

rosy lips purse together as they pull into a goofy grin. there’s a sudden warmth at her cheeks and she knows she’s blushing deeply. still, there’s something about his words that cause her eyes to sparkle as she looks up at him. it makes her feel beautiful, he makes her feel beautiful. “you’re not too bad yourself,” she whispers back. her gaze is locked on his, wide eyed and in awe as he speaks. she’s never believed anything more than the sentence that just left his lips. it’s almost surreal, the one eighty change between them but then again, isn’t it there a thin line between love and hate? one they both seemed to have crossed as the animosity between them morphed into something she can only describe as magical. how she spent all those years bickering with him, she isn’t too sure of anymore. not when they could have reached this conclusion much sooner if they hadn’t been so stubborn and dedicated in their insults. “endless adventures with you sounds perfect,” she replies. she quirks a brow, holding back a laugh before shaking her head lightly. “you forgot hottest too,” she smirks. “should i considering buying a lottery ticket since i seemed to have hit the jackpot with you?” she asks, trying to maintain a feigned matter-of-fact expression before bursting into laughter at how bad that joke was. she shakes her head in disgust, nose scrunched and lips pouting as she reluctantly eats the piece she just bit onto. “not great,” she answers, “i think i need water to cleanse my palette.” 

.

mikel's heart swells with joy as he watches rosy's radiant smile and blush. the way she looks at him, wide-eyed and filled with admiration, ignites a fire within him. he can't help but feel a sense of triumph, knowing that he's the one who brought such happiness to her. her words only fuel his desire to make her feel loved. her compliment strikes a chord deep within him, and he can't help but feel a surge of affection for her. it's as if all the animosity they once shared has melted away, leaving only love and admiration in its wake. mikel finds himself wondering how they wasted so much time bickering when they could have experienced this magic much sooner. her response fills him with warmth and excitement. the idea of endless adventures with her feels like a dream come true. he chuckles at her playful remark, appreciating her witty banter. "you're right," he says, grinning. "hottest definitely belongs on the list. consider it added.” as louisa reluctantly eats a piece and expresses her dissatisfaction, mikel grins mischievously. "not great, huh? well, we wouldn't want your palate to suffer. water, coming right up." he swiftly moves towards the cooler, grabbing a bottle.

[newrcmvntics]

giulia & emir

she stares at him for a moment in silence, letting the question spin in her mind before answering. “i don’t know,” she whsipers.

.

he doesn’t really care her reasons or what made her change her mind. all that matters is that she’s here, back with him. “i missed you.”

[newrcmvntics]

betty & james

the reassurance of it just being the two of them brightens the smile on her lips as she wraps her arms around him in an embrace from the excitement. “i can’t wait,” she beams. her mind already spinning with all the different ways to spend quality time and adventures to go on. there’s a limited number of days and she’s determined that they’re able to make the most of it, aching for a summer they’ll never forget. she squeezes his hand, finding comfort in his touch as she gives a small nod. “okay, then,” she laughs, “i’ll call them and see if any of them are free tonight and i’ll be sure to send you updates of whatever shenanigans we get into.”

.

james feels a heavy weight on his chest as he embraces her, trying to push aside the guilt that consumes him. as her arms wrap around him, he can't help but feel a pang of hypocrisy, knowing the betrayal he carries in his heart. the smile on her lips, full of innocent excitement, only intensifies his feelings of remorse. while she speaks of the upcoming adventures they'll share, james's mind drifts to the secret he keeps hidden. he wrestles with conflicting emotions, torn between the fear of losing her and the guilt of betraying her trust. each passing moment only deepens his internal turmoil. her hand in his provides a temporary solace, a fleeting comfort that briefly eases his guilty conscience. he squeezes her hand, desperately seeking reassurance and forgiveness that he knows he doesn't deserve. a small nod, a forced smile—it all feels like a charade, masking the truth that threatens to unravel their relationship. “i’ll be waiting for those updates, just have fun and don’t worry too much about me.”

[newrcmvntics]

bex & gael

she doesn’t realize how she’d been holding her breath until he confession what the kiss meant to him and there’s a loud exhale that leaves her lips. it comes as a relief as it does a problem. they shouldn’t have been kissing in the first place, bex shouldn’t have kissed him back, and she certainly shouldn’t be thinking of kissing him again. except, she is, and the fact that he admits that he’s also been thinking about it causes a smile to paint over her features. it’s small but the spark is there, the visual confirmation that she’s right in the same boat with him. she braces herself as his hand draws near only to be left disappointed as he pulls back. she nods, he brings up valid points, perhaps the third person invovled in this causing a dent: the boyfriend. he’s a distant memory, someone bex cares for but at a basic human being level. she’s at a loss of words as small sounds leave her lips for a few seconds as she opens and closes her mouth to try and say something, anything. “i do,” she starts, “but what if i don’t?” she shouldn’t have said that and in the split mili-second it takes her to regret it, she settles on actually meaning to ask that. maybe it’s the way he’s opening up for once, holding a conversation instead of snappy or awkward remark. “where does it leave us then?”

.

gael's heart races as he watches bex react to his confession. the relief mixed with concern is evident in her exhale, and he can't help but wonder what thoughts are racing through her mind. they both know deep down that their impulsive kiss was a mistake, but the fact that she's smiling at his words gives him a glimmer of hope. it reassures him that he's not alone in his feelings. as bex struggles to find the right words, gael waits patiently, his gaze locked on her. he can sense her internal battle, the conflicting emotions swirling within her. when she finally speaks, her question catches him off guard. gael's heart sinks for a moment, realizing the implications of her words. gael's fingers fidget slightly as he tries to find the right words to express himself. awkwardness settles in, causing his voice to stumble slightly as he continues, "i... uh... i'm not very good with these kinds of conversations, bex. but i want you to know that your happiness is important to me. i care about you deeply.” he looks down for a moment, gathering his thoughts before meeting her gaze again. "if being together is truly what you want, i won't deny that i feel the same way.

[newrcmvntics]

atlas & ellis

“i am,” she shoots back with a frown, “i’m just not particularly fond of heights, no matter the cause. but what i really want to know is why you aren’t doing it?”

“because i don’t feel like it,” he says with a shrug. “i’m just saying that everyone is expecting you to do it, you wouldn’t want to let them down, would you?”

[newrcmvntics]

giulia & emir

she gives him a small nod, dark eyes lingering on him for a second. there’s something about him that’s innately likable, charming and easy to carry a conversation with. he’s different than most tourists that come by and it’s refreshing to say the least. “winging it’s the only way to go,” she laughs, “it leads to the most memorable adventures.” she has no idea where to start but maybe that’s what’ll make it fun either way? she laughs a little brighter at his conclusion of the meeting spot. “you’re not doing bad so far.” there’s something about what he says that causes a rosy tint to flush on her cheeks and she has to look away. her night has definitely taken a surprising turn but she has absolutely no complaints about it. this by far has turned into one of her favorite shifts thus far. her head spins to turn to him at the compliment, there’s a hint of skepticism behind her eyes though she shoots him a small smile nonetheless. she remains serious for a moment, staring at him before she bursts out laughing. “no need to apologize, the compliment is appreciated.” she turns back to the task at hand as he turns away from her, wiping down a table as silence fills the air for a moment. “yeah!” she excitedly replies, it’s not often someone gets it and she’s glad he does.

.

emir observes her with a warm smile, captivated by her eyes that seem to hold a hint of intrigue. he appreciates her genuine laughter, finding her energy contagious. her comment about winging it excites him, a break from his usual well structured routine. her laughter brightens his own mood. he can't help but notice the delicate blush that graces her cheeks, causing him to glance away briefly, momentarily caught off guard by the effect he seems to have on her. it's a delightful surprise for him, and he cherishes the fact that their encounter has turned into a memorable experience for both of them. as she turns her head to face him, emir meets her gaze, acknowledging the skepticism behind her eyes. he maintains his sincerity, though, and offers her a reassuring smile. "i assure you, the compliment is well-deserved," he affirms, his voice filled with genuine admiration. emir continues with his task, wiping down a table, enjoying a brief moment of silence. as he hears her enthusiastic reply, he turns towards her, his eyes sparkling with shared excitement. “how long have you been living here?”

[newrcmvntics]

louisa & mikel

she feels silly, the way her cheeks start to hurt from how bright she’s smiling back at him. his reaction is infectious and the air around them feels so light and clear, unlike the usual tense and hostile environment that they’ve nurtured thus far. despite the initial awkwardness, she can feel herself letting go of that anxiety that was surrounding her since the kiss, finding herself in a more organic space. she holds onto his every word, hazel eyes lock on his as she looks at him wide eyed. she remains silent as she lets it all wash over her, never once parting her eyes from him. a small smile curves at the edge of her lips as she finally speaks. “so it wasn’t just a dream?” she teases. her stomach flutters as he tells her that he wants to explore the connection between them, her smile widening as she laughs lightly. she reaches out toward him as her hand settles on his arm. “i’d like, a lot,” she quips. 

.

mikel couldn't help but feel a surge of joy and relief wash over him as he witnessed her genuine and radiant smile. the tension that had plagued their interactions seemed to evaporate into thin air, replaced by an atmosphere of ease and clarity. it was a welcome change, a sign that perhaps they could transcend the barriers they had erected between them. her silence speaks volumes, and he finds himself caught up in the moment, savoring the connection they now shared. the smile that graces her lips only serves to deepen his own.when she playfully questions if it was all just a dream, mikel chuckles softly, his heart skipping a beat at the sound. "no, definitely not a dream," he replies, his voice filled with sincerity. "it was very real, and it meant a lot to me." he feels a surge of anticipation as she responds, her words echoing his own desires. her touch, her laughter, and her agreement send a rush of warmth through him. mikel reaches out, mirroring her action as his hand covers hers, intertwining their fingers. “i guess this is the part where i ask you out?”