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[nhsbal-blog]

Why Even Though You Want A Bad Boy, You Should Go For The Good Guy Instead

I think I always imagined that my first love would be some tall dark and handsome guy that is just the right amount of sweet and bad all at the same time.

The moment I lock eyes with this sexy piece of dark chocolate goodness, I know I want him and what I want, I’ll most certainly get.

But let me tell you why as women we are infatuated with the bad boy.

We are infatuated with the idea that someone is able to bring out the right amount of excitement in us and is never a bore.

We never have to worry about this guy ever failing to keep us on our toes and if we are more on the introverted side, the bad boy will show us what we have been missing, not to mention take us to sexual heights we never even thought possible.

We fantasize and yearn for this type of love because we often believe it is the missing piece of our life that will complete us.

The bad boy isn’t ordinary, that will just say yes to your every need and feel intimidated by you as a woman.

I thought like this until the good guy came into my life and showed me what true love means and as corny as it may sound, true love is not all about looks and how good his game may be.

True love changes you as a person and touches you so deeply you are in awe that you were capable of falling in love ever so deeply.

And for a first love especially, it is a beautiful thing because a man that opens your heart initially should always be someone who genuinely cares about you and loves you sincerely for who you are through the good and the bad.

The good guy will sense that you aren’t okay and will tell you to call him immediately so you can just vent all of your worries and concerns to him right away.

He will remind you of your growth and progress in life and if there is a battle to be won, he will be with you in battle and won’t be afraid to fight with you until the end.

He’s honest with you and wants you to articulate your every need, wants and worries so you are both always on the same page.

He won’t stop reminding that you are beautiful and amazing and will pray with you and for you every second of every day.

He’s sincerely sweet, almost having a cute innocence about him, but his love for you is unquestionable and you feel like the luckiest woman in the world.

However, and most surprisingly, contrary to what you may have believed the nice guy isn’t a bore, makes you laugh, is incredibly sexy, and can keep you on your toes.

Sex with him is incredible, more than amazing even because not only do you both have indescribable chemistry, but his main concern is always to make sure you are pleased.

This guy makes you feel like no other could even if they tried and when you are ever in doubt of this love you always listen to the way you feel and the way he looks at you like you are the most important thing to him.

He’s authentic and his flaws remind you that true love isn’t about perfection, but acceptance.

He will go out of his way to make sure you are always okay and won’t stop until he is sure you are taken care of.

He will reason with you in every situation and remind you to always see the good.

You feel comfortable with him enough to share your darkest and deepest secrets without ever feeling judged because he always makes you feel safe.

The good guy will fight for your life when you are in the depths of darkness like it is his own and when you cry, the tears run from his eyes.

The good guy changed me and made me never regret the time I waited for love.

So, give the good guy a shot, because you won’t regret it and sometimes, it is exactly who you have needed all along.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

How to Listen to your Heart

1. First, quieten your rational mind as it has a tendency to hush, distort or quash the intuition of your heart.

2. Practice mindfulness. This is grounding yourself in the present moment, and being aware of all the sights, sounds and sensations that are happening in the here-and-now.

3. Go with the flow. Don’t try to force your heart to speak to you. Instead, simply “be” and allow your heart to speak in its own time, and in its own way.

4. Get into the habit of paying attention to every nudge and whisper from your intuition. We are taught to silence those inner tugs and pulls – so begin to notice, and to listen to, them.

5. Trust and act upon your intuition. It’s important to treat those inner messages as valid, and then follow your instincts – and notice where they lead you.  

You’ll find that life is more rewarding if you listen to your heart – as well as listening to your rational mind.

[thelovejournals]

When the right one comes along, you figure it out. You move mountains, you change your life and you do whatever it takes to keep them with you.

Jay Crownover, Jet (via thelovejournals)

[lovingregs]

When you ask me what’s wrong, I’m not sure what to say. Do you wanna hear how I wish I could crawl out of my own skin because it doesn’t feel much like home anymore? Do you wanna hear how I don’t mind the voices in my head or the ringing in my ears because then I know I’m not alone? Do you wanna hear how I can’t stand to look in the mirror anymore because I don’t know what self love is? Do you wanna hear about how I’m not sure what love is because it’s something so foreign to me? Do you wanna hear about how I cant sleep much anymore so I often find myself thinking about everything I wish I could change. Do you wanna hear about how I’m not even sure why I’m sad, I just know that this hole inside me shouldn’t be here. I know that these things are things you don’t need to hear, so instead I tell you I’m fine, just a little tired

(tired)

[nidhibhasin]

Our Silence

This silence we share is the most beautiful thing about us.Together, both of us, listening to the other breathe, feeling our hearts beating, for each other, having the warmth of your arms comfort my soul. I’d carefully listen to your silence and project thoughts and words onto it. It’s strange isn’t it? It’s very weird, this thing we share, as if I could hear you think, conveying myself to you is no longer dependent on the use of words. I know, I just know you so much, sometimes you fall short of words and a single kiss on my lips tells me all you are struggling to speak. And on days when I have nothing to say, nothing to talk about how accurately you know what to do, where to kiss, how tightly to hold my hand or the duration of your embrace.. its beautiful, whatever it is, I wonder if they have a name for this feeling..

I’ve never had someone understand me so well, so deeply, so accurately.

[thepowerwithin]

In your life, doors may close on you. People may leave you. Jobs may fail you. However, for every downfall there are ten more successes waiting for you to pursue them. For every step back there is always another ascension. Setbacks will always happen, however it’s up to you to decide how to react to them.

Nicole Addison @thepowerwithin (via thepowerwithin)

[islamicrays]

Know that the path to Allah is not a flat one. Your iman (faith) will go up and down. Your ability to worship will go up and down. But, know that for every dip, there is also a rise. Just stay patient, stay consistent, don’t lose hope and seek help in Allah. The path is hard. The path will have bumps and drops. But, like all things in this life, this path will come to an end. And that end will make it all worth it!

-Yasmin Mogahed, “Reclaim Your Heart” (via islamicrays)

[thelovejournals]

Some people bring out the worst in you, others bring out the best, and then there are those remarkably rare, addictive ones who bring out the most. Of everything. They make you feel so alive that you’d follow them straight into hell…

Karen Marie Moning, Shadowfever  (via thelovejournals)

[violentwavesofemotion-deactivat]

It wasn’t because of the pain that I was silent, it was because of the ugliness of that pain.

Marina Tsvetaeva, from a letter to Rainer Maria Rilke c. June 1926 (via violentwavesofemotion)

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

How to Trust Again

1. Recognize the benefits of trusting others, and building some meaningful relationships. If you never let others get close to you, then you’re likely to feel lonely and empty inside.

2. Remember that one person doesn’t have to meet your needs. We can trust different people with aspects of ourselves. Doing that can feel less risky, and a lot less scary.

3. Look at the actions of other people before you decide if you can trust them or not. If they are kind to others and they seem reliable, then it’s likely they will treat you in that same way, too. However, be wary of people who are mean or critical, or who talk about others, or are unpredictable.

4. Give trust slowly – let others prove themselves – and if they seem trustworthy then start to trust them more. Share a few small things before you share some bigger things.

5. Trust yourself to cope if someone lets you down. We’ve all been disappointed and betrayed by other people. Have the confidence to know that you will manage, and survive!!

6. Don’t pressurise yourself to give more than you are able. It’s hard to trust others if you’re feeling insecure, or if you’ve been hurt by others, or if trust is threatening. Decide to take it slowly and be patient with yourself.

[psych-facts]

Tips on How to Move Forward

1. Moving forward requires one step at a time. You don’t just one day suddenly feel alright at where you are and not get pulled/pushed back. It’s a gradual buildup of how you feel and the product of your hard work. So if you feel good one day, ask yourself what is it that makes you feel good and keep striving for the thing that makes you feel good. If compromises are necessary, do it anyways. Strategically weigh the prices you have to pay for the future that you desire vs the having to feel bad at this moment. 

2. Leave all baggages behind. If you are waiting for someone or hoping that someone would turn around, don’t. Put a closure to it. If you must intentionally destroy all chances you have with that person, do it and say everything you need to say ‘good or bad.’ Just don’t linger on any expectations. If something is meant to be, it will be. 

3. Always smile and have faith in your actions. Never question yourself and if what you do is right or not. Just believe in yourself and realize that you’re human. If you’re making mistakes towards your objective, don’t sweat it too much. The outcome will be the same regardless of how many mistakes you make as long as you are striving towards that ending you desire. 

4. If you’re lazy or your work habit is a mess, start putting effort into things. Get in touch with the feelings of discouragement, unsatisfactions, and guilt for not reaching your goals. They are your callings. Listen to them, and use them to be the driving force of your productivity. Only productivity can make you happy. 

5. Forget everything else. Put the less important stuff aside. Try to not procrastinate. Be conscious of your habits and slowly replace them with something else. For example, if you find yourself watching Anime instead of studying, while watching Anime, think about your work behind your head. Eventually all you’ll be thinking about is work.

6. Start slow. Don’t immediately throw everything aside, start small by working towards making greater and greater sacrifices. For example, don’t immediately decide that you are going to stop hanging out with friends, or stop watching Animes, instead, slowly remove one thing at a time. 

7. Should the day come when you finally succeed, then you can rest if you want to. At least, you’ve already lived your life to the fullest and will not have any more regrets. You’ll be eternally happy and carefree. 

[sxrvantofallah-deactivated20180]

Messenger of Allah (Peace be upon him) said:

❝If anyone continually asks forgiveness, Allah will appoint for him a way out of every distress, relief from anxiety, and will provide for him from where he never realized.❞

[Abu Dawood, Hadith 599]

[ukhtifr]

Astaghfirullah..

[notduaa-deactivated20190830]

Imam Shafi’i ‎رحمه الله said:

“If you want to fix your heart, or would like to see improvement in your child or friend, or anyone for that matter, then direct them to places where the Qur’an is recited and direct them to be in the company of the Qur’an.

Allaah will then cause them to become better, regardless of whether they want to or not!”

Source: Hilyat al-Awliya’ (v. 9, p. 123)

[quotewithasource]

At some time in your life, you probably had someone believe in you when you didn’t believe in yourself.

Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change (via quotewithasource)

[amortizing]

“I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.”

Douglas Adams (via amortizing)

[aboorayhaana-deactivated2018042]

وَوَجَدَكَ ضَالًّا فَهَدَىٰ

And He found you lost and guided [you]. (93:7)

[sodhya-deactivated20181218]

There is both pain and comfort in the fact that nothing lasts forever