Self Satisfaction

Let's having friendship professionally without letting private feelings into it.

[nnianyaosu]

At appearance I might be happy.

But inside, I am in chaos.

My eternity enemy is definitely my mind and my ego :)

[nnianyaosu]

This love-hate relationship going to last till death do us part.

[nnianyaosu]

How to uncare.

I believe I have the capability to do this and that but slowly I have stopped caring about them. It is beyond my responsibilities. Lets just do what I can within my responsibility. Because they seem do not care about this too so lets just see how things unfold.

[nnianyaosu]

"I can not drink coffee and tea" by me, to everyone who offers me a drink.

[nnianyaosu]

Unplanned new activity, Kyūdō - 弓道

I dont think this is accidental since I randomly tried to apply this dojo in January 2026 and miraculously able to be the member of the dojo. Yes, I have been doing archery; kyudo, since this January 2026, which actually this activity was not in my 2026 plan.

After 4 times (since the keiko was once a week, so it was 4 weeks) I and the other 5 new members officially join the dojo. It is more relaxed than I thought to be. The senpais were nice and quite patient when teaching us.

So I have been two months practicing kyudo and I think I am going to keep this for years. I hope I can do well, have good relationship with other members, senpai and with other dojo as well. Since this sport also quite pricey, I hope this year I can complete everything necessary! Letsssgoooo!!!

2026.03.02 15:58

[incidentalcomics]

From my book THINKING ABOUT THINKING, published by Abrams ComicArts and available worldwide.

Thinking About Thinking Impossible Thoughts and Complicated Feelings

A playful examination of the way we think (and overthink) by cartoonist Grant Snider, creator of Incidental Comics, which appear regularly i

[nnianyaosu]

My first time of astrophotography.

Yeah last 2025 actually I was trying to get into new club related into astronomy and to be honest that was great time. Surrounded by environment and people that thinks positively about science, space etc was really a fresh experience for me after working for days. And astrophotography was expensive as hell. Yeah even common photography is expensive but astrophotography is much expensive since you will take photos with much further objects in the darkness.

My first experience was fun. People quite crowded and their excitement was quite high. I got to know few people but unfortunately due to my schedule I could not get into the club (they need minimum number of my attendance of their seminars). So now I am trying to attend their activities again. I hope I can become their member in 2026.

I took this photo with Iphone 13 pro with their telescope (I forgot what telescope I used). It was quite tricky but I think I got the hang of it.

So, 2026, I really should arrange my schedule better for able to join this club lol.

Photo taken on 2025, Aug 2nd.

2026.02.25 11:06

[nnianyaosu]

なんでもいいから、書こう。

って言いたいところだが、実は仕事でSNSが使えなくて、Tumblrだけが開けたので、じゃ少しずつ昔話や、思い出や、まぁ、色々更新したいと思う。

とくになぜか最近辛い思いがたくさんある気がする。自分が自分に不幸になるまで考えてしまう。自分が弱い人間だと思っていたが、ここまで生きていると人生は何とかなるもんだ。

残念なのは22年から写真を撮る趣味を戻っていて、インスタグラムで写真を上げて、自分が好きな音楽と合わせて、とてもいい気分だが、ここはそういうのはできないので、まさに残念。

写真を上がる予定なので、好きな歌詞載せるかな...

できろと言いなw

2026.02.04 10:45

[nnianyaosu]

「違いを愛して生きてゆこう」

That's the zatsudan's tittle Guiano live stream and unexpectedly he read and reacted to my marshmallow.

[nnianyaosu]

Second solo trip…. And joining open trip…もうめちゃくちゃ楽しかったんだ。他の参加者も明るくて優しい人だったし、自分が1人旅行思えないぐらいの楽しさ。予定遅れたり、寮変更したり、夜めちゃ暑かったのでよく眠らなかったりしたが、本当に久しぶりにこんなに自由と楽しさを経験できて、本当にありがたいです。

また1人旅行しようぜ。

[seekers-who-are-lovers]

Yana’s contribution for GFantasy’s 30th anniversary. Wowww! Ciel as an oyster.

[kuroshitsuji-indonesia]

Gfantasy April issue featuring Black Butler.

Yana Toboso note on Gfantasy cover: G Fantasy’s 30th Anniversary! Speaking of 30th Anniversary, Pearl Jubilee🦪! So here are Sebastian and Ciel in oyster and pearl accessories and dresses. Happy 30th anniversary, G-Fantasy!!!

Note from Yana Toboso about Ciel outfit: Draft of the clothing for the cover. Ciel’s clothes are often limited to one time only, so I adjusted them as I drew them, so this is really a draft. This time, the theme was “Clothes that look like oysters if you look at them from a distance”. I tried to express the striped pattern of a seashell with pleated frills, but readers couldn’t see it.

[nnianyaosu]

海にずっと逃げたかったので着いたらめちゃくちゃ嬉しかった！

[nnianyaosu]

人の感情って変わるものだから、怖いんだ。

[yan-wo]

David Axelbank

[yuumei-art]

Seeds For Tomorrow

Inspired by the brave Ukrainian woman who told the invading Russian soldier “Put sunflower seeds in your pocket so that sunflowers will grow when you die here.”

[nnianyaosu]

他の人の気持ちからやっとお別れでした。最初は嬉しかったけど、少し違和感があるけど正直に言うとほっとした。

自分の気持ちは自分のものだから、嘘はつきたくないし、他の人は知らなくてもいいんじゃないかなぁという考え方になってしまった。