Growing up Kitra never knew what it was like to feel loved. Having been abandoned by her parents she never got the maternal or paternal affection that a child needs, and the orphanage leaders certainly never provided any sort of care or affection to her. The only individualized attention she could get was either punishment or approval. So the positive emotion that came along with praise was her driving force. She did not know what it was to be loved, but the feeling of being recognized for her achievements was just nice enough to fill that void in her and make her assume that was what should be strived for.
When she joined the Alliance she was finally able to get a steady supply of approval that made her feel secure. Each kill was met with a “Well done” and those words alone were enough to sustain her starving soul. So she kills hundreds, each time striving for more praise, more titles, more acclaim because it could never be enough to fully take the place of the love that she was missing.
But upon joining the team she was forced into a situation where the lives of others depended on her. For so long it was her job to make sure her targets died, so the responsibility to keeping others people life in mind was completely unfamiliar to her. But with each failure she was met with forgiveness, and she began to understand what love is. Love is coming back for her, family means leaving no one behind.
When the team disbanded she lost her purpose and she lost that strange and wonderful feeling that had been growing in her chest. She thought it came from the hunt, searching for Ordair. But when she saw Ordair captured and in Alliance custody she knew that wasn’t the feeling she’d been seeking out.
And when she realized that she was the one who brought desolation to Roame she knew she could not leave that planet unless every civilian was safe. Kitra learned what love meant, and in her final day she learned how to share it: even with strangers. So looking up at the sky, she didn’t feel left behind, she felt like she was apart of something. Finally able to understand the love that was given to her and to use it to what was right. Her mission was complete, her family was safe, and she was not being abandoned this time. She chose to stay - to look up at the sky and see the people she loved and who loved her fly away knowing that she found what she’d been looking for when she came to Roame.